Disclaimer: "If you wanna be somebody else If you're tired of fighting battles With yourself If you wanna be somebody else Change your mind"

(An: I read a fic from Longshot's POV, and I figured it would be a lot of fun to write someone who couldn't actually speak. I'm going to use female pronouns for Smellerbee the whole way through because this is Longshot looking back, and of course he wouldn't think of her as a boy. So… yeah. He only thinks she's a boy for two scenes, anyway. Also, Iroh and Zuko get referred to as Mushi and Lee because… well, it's funny.)

When I first met her, I didn't know.

The Duke, coming back from scouting one night, told us he'd seen smoke on the horizon. Jet had nodded, his face solemn. I could tell the exact words he was thinking- Another village burned. He tossed his drink into the fire, and we left.

There were less of us then: just me, Jet, the Duke, and Pipsqueak. We hadn't named ourselves yet- back then, we were just a bunch of kids trailing after Jet. We had stopped a few Fire Nation raids, but it hadn't been enough to band us into the Freedom Fighters we would be one day.

The town was a smoking ruin, but most of the buildings were still standing. Pipsqueak and the Duke started putting out the fires, and Jet and I went to look for survivors outside the village.

I found her by a river. Her clothes were torn and burnt, and she was cutting her hair with a stone dagger. At the time, I thought she was a boy. She was about ten, so she hadn't started to… show, and it was normal for warriors to wear their hair in a wolftail or topknot.

I made sure to make a lot of nose when I approached; I didn't want to startle her into cutting herself, and it just didn't feel right to find her while she was doing something so private. Cutting off her hair meant she had lost her honor.

I snapped a twig, and she whirled, nearly dropping the knife. "Who's there?" She glanced around, eyes feral.

I stepped out of the forest, holding up my hands. I set down my bow, inclining my head.

She had wide, dark eyes, half-hidden beneath a blue bandana. Four raw burns marked her cheeks, twins on either side. "Who are you?" she demanded. Instead of putting down the dagger, she brandished it, daring me to challenge her.

I just stared back, walking over to sit by her.

She looked me over, still wary. "Can't you talk?"

I rolled my eyes with a mental sigh. Every time I got asked that it got more annoying. You'd think people would know not to ask.

She raised an eyebrow. "Can't or won't?"

I blinked. Ordinarily, people apologized for asking or offered a feeble quip. I far preferred her way.

She shrugged and started hacking at her hair again. When she finished, she looked down at her reflection in the water, the shaggy remnants of her hair hiding her face. I reached over and took the dagger from her shaking hands. She jerked away when I touched her and nicked my palm. Quietly, she ripped off a strip of her shirt and tied off the wound.

I liked her already. She didn't apologize, she just dealt with things. And, even better, she didn't feel the need to fill my silence. She just stood there, her shoulders shaking and her eyes closed.

There was a shrill whistle from the distance. I returned it. She glanced at me, looking suspicious, but I held up a hand, giving her back her dagger.

A few moments later, Jet arrived. He looked around. "No one else?" I shook my head.

"You shouldn't have bothered," the "boy" muttered. "I'm just here because I ran. The only others they let live were the benders and some of the women."

"Just like the Fire Nation," Jet muttered. He plucked a strand of grass and started to chew it, looking agitated. "My name's Jet, and this is Longshot." He looked at the "boy".

"Smellerbee," she muttered. I raised an eyebrow. She glared at me and pointed at the marks on her face. "The raiders thought it was pretty funny, too, so they gave me these. They said I should look the part… besides," she crossed her arms, "it's not any weirder than 'Longshot'." She looked back at Jet. "What do you want?"

Jet held out a hand. "I want you to join us."

Smellerbee wasn't impressed. "Who's 'us'?"

"Me, him, the Duke, and Pipsqueak. The Fire Nation left us homeless, too." Smellerbee winced. "We try to stop their attacks and help people they've affected."

"And you're asking me to join you? …Why?"

"I'm assuming you know how to use that," Jet replied, pointing at her dagger. "We could use another pair of eyes, anyway."

She looked at the ground, tracing the wounds on her cheeks. "But I ran," she whispered.

"You aren't running now," Jet replied with a shrug. He cocked his head, hearing two calls that hadn't been made by birds. "There's the others. Are you with us?" Smellerbee nodded slowly, and Jet clapped her on the back. "Good man." Smellerbee made a face for no apparent reason as we walked away.

O-o-O-o-O

Anyone from her village would never have recognized the Smellerbee of a month later. Her gender was hidden beneath a chestplate, her hair was cropped and messy, and the scars on her cheeks were covered with red facepaint. We were friends by that point. She was the only one but Jet who always understood me.

O-o-O-o-O

I didn't find out for two years. It was in the middle of the night. We had established our tree haven and earned our name by then, and I had to awaken her for her turn on watch.

When I peered into her room, I saw her curled up in a moonbeam. I froze. The person laying there couldn't be Smellerbee. She was too perfect, too lovely, too… female. Without the chestplate, it was kind of obvious she wasn't a boy. Her face, while not exactly happy, was more peaceful- in sleep, she lost her "Mess with me, I dare you" expression.

I took a step forward, and a floorboard creaked. Smellerbee, always tense, stirred; her hand crept under her pillow to a dagger before her eyes opened. She sat up, squinting, and spotted me.

I was still gaping. I just couldn't seem to accept it- Smellerbee, a girl? I'd never met anyone so masculine.

She set down the dagger when she recognized me, turning red even as her brows snapped together in her usual defiant stare. "Are you just going to gawk all night? What do you want?"

I blinked and gestured vaguely outside. Despite her "Keep staring and you die" glare, I couldn't look away.

"Oh, right, my turn for watch." She got up, tugging her shirt closed around herself. She didn't seem embarrassed; she was blushing, but it was because she had been caught out, not from modesty. She strapped on her chestplate and tied her bandana, tucking her daggers into their sheathes. When she was fully dressed, she hesitated, her expression softening. "Longshot, I know I never said anything, but… I was afraid you all wouldn't take me seriously if I did... this isn't going to change things, right?"

I shook my head, but the odd feeling welling up in my chest begged to differ.

O-o-O-o-O

Despite my silent promise, things did change. She seemed more willing to relax around me because of my discovery. While she never prattled, I learned a lot about her in the year that followed.

One thing that surprised me was her insecurities. I had never seen her afraid, but here she was, telling me how nervous living with a bunch of boys made her.

"I mean, you don't bother me, Longshot," she murmured one night. "You get it- you always do. But I get the feeling that if I told anyone else, they'd either laugh or just kinda stare… you know?" She sighed, and I put an arm around her shoulders, trying to ignore the little thrill I felt when she leaned against me. "And it's just plain weird, being a girl. Like sometimes, when I look at Jet…" But she shook her head, the faintest tint of color in her cheeks.

I didn't let go because I knew she needed me, even though I wanted to move away. This was even more unfair than my previous reason for hiding my feelings- I had thought she was too young to understand. But now it was clear she understood very well, just not in the way I'd hoped.

I felt guilty, too- not just because of what I was hiding from her, but also because I could never be that open, even if she did usually know what I was trying to say.

O-o-O-o-O

Things went on that way for a long time. Smellerbee never spoke of her crush on Jet again, but I noticed that the only time she got short with me was when she felt he had ignored her. I, of course, never tried to make my feelings apparent; it would have been too hard, to know it was the only thing she would never understand. It was hard to find sure footing with her though, like when the Avatar came to our camp.

When we ate, Smellerbee's words were clipped. Ordinarily, dinner was when she talked the most- trading insults with the Duke, swearing at Pipsqueak when he stole her food, discussing tactics with Jet. But today she was quiet, glaring at her plate.

I nudged her, an eyebrow raised. She scowled at me. In retaliation, I took her apple, but she didn't seem to notice. Her eyes had strayed to Jet, talking with the Avatar and his companions. I nudged her again, trying not to let my amusement show. She glanced at me and made a face. "Would you leave me alone, Longshot?" she snapped. "I'm fine. There's absolutely nothing wrong." She got up and left without touching her food.

I let her stew for what seemed like an appropriate amount of time, tossing her apple from hand to hand, then went to find her.

She was hiding in one of the taller trees, where she knew no one would bother her. Except me, of course. She didn't glare at me or call me something obscene when I approached, she just continued staring out at the canopy. She accepted her apple, taking a thoughtful bite as I sat beside her. "Quit giving me that look," she said after a while. "I am not jealous."

I raised an eyebrow, unaware I'd suggested any such thing… even if I had been thinking it.

Smellerbee crossed her arms and grimaced. "Ok, maybe I am. So what?" She sighed, resting her head on her arms. "I'm not jealous like that-" she clasped her hands beneath her chin and fluttered her eyelashes, "-I'm just…" She shrugged. "That girl Katara is everything I'm not, and it's obvious who he prefers." She groaned in disgust. "I don't even know why it's bothering me. I like who I am. What is it about him that makes me want to change?"

I shrugged. I knew what she meant. Nobody made me want to break my silence like she did.

She studied me, then asked, "You don't want me to change, do you, Longshot?"

I could only blink for a second. It was amazing how often she pulled the rug out from under my feet. I shook my head vehemently. Never, I wanted to say, never, never, never. I put an arm around her shoulders and pulled her close, realizing with a start that what I really wanted to do was kiss her.

But this gesture was far more brotherly, and that was all I'd ever be to her.

She surprised me by hugging back and burying her face in my chest. "Why am I even bothered?" she asked. "Jet doesn't know I'm a girl, and I like it that way!" I prodded her gently, and she looked up. "Why haven't I told him?" She shrugged, leaning against me again. "I guess I'm afraid he won't respect me as much or something." I rubbed her back. "I know I've proved myself, I just… I don't like change." Now I hugged her. I understood that very well. She glanced up again, her dark eyes innocuous. "Are you all right? Your heart's going that fast…"

Damn. So she had noticed. I raised and lowered a shoulder in a one-armed shrug and played with a strand of her hair, trying to look unbothered by the question. I wished she was still a foot shorter than me; since she had caught up to me in height, the temptation to close the inches between our lips was unbearable.

"What is it?" she asked. Could she really not know?

There was a conspicuously loud bang from somewhere down the hall. Both of us jumped at the sound, and the moment (much to my relief) was broken. She let go of me and stepped away. "Pipsqueak," she muttered. She sighed and looked out the window again.

O-o-O-o-O

After the flooding of the town, we found Jet frozen to a tree. He was straining for a hayseed just beyond his reach. "There you guys are!" Smellerbee crossed her arms. "Are you going to help me or what?" he asked after a moment.

I held back because of the intense look on Smellerbee's face. "Things need to change, Jet," she said, after a moment.

Jet paused, a frown settling over his face. "What do you mean?"

"I did a lot of thinking, and Ponytail actually had a point. We did the wrong thing here. You're always going on about how the Fire Nation left us homeless, but we just did the same to those people!" Jet opened his mouth. "No! I'm not listening to you anymore." She drew her dagger. "Longshot and I are getting out of here." I looked at her; I hadn't been aware of this. She hadn't spoken to me all day, even when I'd gotten her down from the trap. She gave me an "of course you are" look. She did have a point. Jet's fiery words and our old wounds meant little when faced with people left in our situation. She added, "The Duke and Sneers have already left."

Jet blinked. "What about Pipsqueak?"

"He's up a tree," Smellerbee replied, with a hint of a smirk; I had pointedly ignored him when I'd freed her. She shook herself. "But that's not the point! We'll let you come with us if you promise that this is the end."

"Of what?"

"Of the Freedom Fighters! We went too far. What about next time?" She glared at him. "Where does it stop, Jet?"

Jet glared back. He knew his usual flash wouldn't work. Although stubborn and obsessive, Jet wasn't stupid. He still had one last tack to try, though. "You went along with it."

Now I scowled. I put an arm around Smellerbee and started to lead her away.

"Wait!" Jet hung his head and sighed. "Do I at least get to know where we're going?"

Smellerbee rolled her eyes and started chipping at the ice. "Probably Ba Sing Se. No Fire Nation there. We can start over."

Jet frowned but kept his mouth shut.

(Click onward for the other half… It's not that long to me, but I cut it up in case someone wanted a break.)