Well, here it is. My first story. I really hope you all like. Thanks goes out to Takato the Dreamer, and Mr. Goosey Moose. They are truly wonderful writers who have helped me with the confidence to post these on here.

I do not own Digimon. I do not own the characters either.

The first thing Izzy always noticed was his eyes; those big brown orbs of warmth always greeted him when Tai approached. Izzy couldn't count how many times he had found himself becoming lost in them.

"Hey Tai?"

"Yeah Izzy?" They were both packing up from their last class. Izzy had really helped Tai in school. Tai had good grades, and was being considered for several colleges. Izzy of course, needed no tutoring, and had several offers coming his way. That is, when they became seniors next year. For now, they were just enjoying high school life.

"Can you come over after school? There's something I want to talk to you about." Izzy had realized about half a year ago that he was in love with his best friend. After about six months of waiting, and gathering his courage, he was going to tell Tai he loved him tonight. Tai didn't even know Izzy was gay. Actually, Izzy didn't know if Tai was gay or not. Tai never made any hints at being gay, but he didn't have a girlfriend either. Who was Izzy kidding? Tai was the Soccer team captain and one of the most sought after guys in school. Izzy had no chance in hell. Izzy looked down sadly. He felt a hand on his shoulder. Izzy looked up and his black eyes met Tai's brown ones looking at him in compassion.

"Izzy? Is something wrong?" Izzy shook his head and smiled.

"No, I'm fine."

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. And sure, I'll come over. Aren't your parents leaving this afternoon?" Izzy shook his head.

"No, they leave tomorrow and will also be gone Saturday and Sunday." Izzy's parents were going off by themselves on a weekend cruise. This was another reason why Izzy wanted to tell Tai tonight; because his parents could be there to support him if he needed it. Izzy didn't want anything bad to happen, but he didn't know what would occur.

"I'll see you there. I have to go home and get something. . ." Tai saw Sora and Matt walk down the hall. Izzy put his hand on his friend's arm. Tai smiled and nodded. Tai had been a bit bitter after Matt and Sora got together. Tai had not liked either one romantically, Izzy knew, but Tai felt betrayed. Matt and Sora were constantly with each other. Tai and Matt had been close, as well as Tai and Sora. Once Matt and Sora got together, though, Tai felt himself being pushed away. Tai was hurt. But Izzy wasn't complaining. It was the reason he and Tai became closer and eventually best friends.

"I'll see you Izzy." Tai left the room. Izzy watched him and sighed. One thing was for sure, tonight was going to be interesting.

… … … … …

"Hey Tai, come in." Ms. Izumi told Tai, holding the door open. Tai walked in, and took his shoes off.

"Hey Ms. Izumi." Tai had been to Izzy's house, many times. So much now that he practically lived there. If Tai's mom was wondering where he was, she always called The Izumis' house first. Most of the time, he was there.

"Izzy's in his room." Tai nodded, and started to walk back there. Ms. Izumi's smile faltered. He knew what Izzy was telling Tai tonight. She could only hope Tai felt the same. If not, she was ready to comfort her son. Tai knocked on the door.

"Come in." Izzy's voice came through. Tai went in, and then smiled. Izzy was typing away on his computer.

"Hey."

"Hey." Came the response. Tai walked over and sat on the bed. It was quite the big bedroom. It had a queen sized bed at the back; a whole desk set up, where Izzy was currently sitting; and even an attached bathroom. It was much bigger than his old room, as the Izumi's had moved a year ago.

"You wanted to talk?" Izzy looked up. He nodded, and shut his laptop. Tai sat up. He could see the seriousness that took over Izzy's form. Izzy looked very nervous. His eyes were darting. His breathing looked faster. Izzy's throat was tightening up from anxiety. Tai wondered why he noticed so many things about his friend. He never noticed these things with other people.

"Izzy? Are you okay?" Izzy hesitated and looked away. 'What is he so nervous about?' Tai wondered. Izzy walked over and sat beside the gogglehead on the bed. Tai put his hand on Izzy's shoulder again. Izzy's eyes met the brunette's.

"Izzy. You know you can tell me anything. We're best friends." Izzy nodded. He took a deep breath. It was now or never.

"Tai, I have something to tell you." Izzy said. Tai nodded.

"I . . . I love you." Tai stared at him uncomprehendingly.

"I love you too Izzy."

"No Tai. . . I 'love you' love you. I love you more than just friends." Izzy felt first relief at finally admitting that to his friend. But then he swallowed hard. He saw as Tai's face changed from humor, to surprise, to anger, and then. . . fury? Or was it fear?

"You mean . . . you're gay. . . and you. . . love me?" Tai asked, his face full of hate and disgust. Izzy could feel reality starting to slip.

"Tai. . . don't hate me. Please. . . If anything . . . please don't hate me. . ." A tear streamed down Izzy's cheek. Tai shook his head, and ran his hand through his thick bushy hair. Tai stood up and backed away from Izzy. Izzy stood slowly, and held out a hand, as if to stop Tai. Tai continued to back up until he hit the wall. Tai then physically flinched. He looked at Izzy then in revulsion, and turned to leave.

"Tai, wait!" Izzy ran over and grabbed Tai's arm. Tai swung his arm and sent Izzy back into the floor.

"God hates Fags." Tai's voice was low, and dull. "And so do I." With that he turned and left. Izzy felt his heart crack and shatter. It was as if a knife. . . no a sword had pierced him. At first, Izzy was too hurt to cry. He was to hurt to do anything, except sit there, and let it slowly sink in. Once it did, though, it became a torrential downpour. His heart cried out in anguish and betrayal. How dare he? How dare he just leave? How dare he go, when I need him most? Where do I go now? What do I do? Izzy collapsed, sobbing.

… … … … …

The one thing Izzy was not looking forward to was facing Tai the next day. Izzy had stopped crying early that morning. He looked horrible, and he dreaded what Tai had to say. But nothing could've prepared him. Tai was there, but he did not look at Izzy. He didn't even talk to him. This was the worst punishment Izzy could've received. Whereas Tai would have normally joked around with Izzy, he was silent. When Tai would've talked to him, Tai turned to others. And during group work, Tai kept to himself, and never made eye contact. Izzy felt terrible. He had ruined his friendship with Tai. It was over. Izzy just felt himself become slowly numb. He didn't feel anything. He didn't want to feel anything. He was dead inside. He wanted to talk to his parents more, but they left. They had thought about canceling, but Izzy insisted they leave. He didn't want them to be concerned over him. He would be fine. So they hesitantly left early that morning. It took all day for Izzy to die inside. Tai hated him. Izzy did not realize how much stock he had placed in that friendship, and now it was gone. There was only one thing left to do now. . .

Izzy left early. He had to prepare. He first opened a portal to the Digital World and talked with Tentomon and Gennai, who tried to dissuade him, but to no avail. Then he went over to a place he knew he would hate, but he went anyway. He knocked on the Kamiya apartment door.

"Hey Izzy!" Ms. Kamiya said, opening the door.

"Hi Ms. Kamiya." Izzy's voice sounded dull and uncaring.

"I'm sorry, but Tai's not here, he's at soccer practice."

"I know. I just had to drop something off for him." Izzy walked to Tai's room. It almost brought tears to his eyes to see a place he once found safe and fun now hostile and unfriendly. He placed the letter he had written on Tai's unmade bed. He chuckled sadly to himself and sadly left the room.

"I have to go now." He called out.

"Okay Izzy. Hey, are you okay?" Ms. Kamiya asked. Izzy forced a smile and turned to her.

"Everything's fine." Izzy said leaving. He turned as he got to the door.

"Hey, Ms. Kamiya?"

"Could you. . . make sure Tai stays happy and well, no matter what happens?"

"Uh. . . well sure Izzy."

"Thanks. Bye. . ."

"Bye Izzy. . ."

… … … … …

Tai burst through the door.

"Hey mom!"

"Hey Tai! You're home really early." Tai nodded.

"Yeah, soccer was canceled because it was starting to rain badly."

"Okay. . . oh Tai! Izzy was here earlier!" Tai's eyes widened.

"And?"

"Well, he said he had something to drop off, then he left. You need to talk to him. He looks kind of down. . ."

"Yeah. . ." Tai muttered under his breath. "I'll do that." He walked back to his room. He first saw the note. Tai may be a very disorganized person, but he could recognize something out of place. He opened the letter to see Izzy's handwriting.

Dear Tai,

I know your practice runs late into the afternoon, so by the time you read this, I'll have already succeeded in my plan. I want you to know, I do not take back what I said. I do love you, and I'm sorry you couldn't feel the same. But I just want you to keep moving forward with your life, no matter what. You are a very courageous and determined guy. It's one of the things I admire in you.

And though I will no longer be around to push you, I want you to still try and study for school. You have a good future ahead of you. Do not waste it.

I'm not sure what I was trying to do with this letter. I don't know. I was never good with goodbyes. I hope it makes sense to you. I'm not sure it does to me. but there's no more time for regrets anymore. Frankly, I can't find a good reason to care to. So goodbye, Tai.

Sincerely yours,

Izzy Izumi

Tai read and reread the letter many times. "Already succeeded in my plan" and "goodbyes" really stuck out in his mind. It meant something. But what could it mean? Tai shook his head, and ran his hands through his hair. Why was his thinking so confused when it came to Izzy? Why couldn't his friendships be clear cut? What was is about Izzy? Was it his warm, curious personality? Was it his smile? Or perhaps it was the way his eyes shone when Tai was talking to him. Or the way Izzy would blush. Tai realized he noticed a lot of little things about Izzy. Izzy was a big part of his life. He knew how Izzy thought, what he dreamed. His secrets, his ambitions, his hopes, his fears. . . Izzy was his best friend. No . . . Izzy was more than that. His day always was based on Izzy. No matter what, Izzy could lift his spirits. Izzy was the highlight of his day. Not to mention he was very cute. . . Wait what? Did he just say that? Was he attracted to Izzy? This was all new to him. Or . . . was it? Tai realized then that he loved his friend. He absolutely did. The fact hit him like a ton of bricks. Goodbye. . .

"He's going to. . . No . . ." Tai got up and ran out. He didn't even put on his shoes. He just ran as fast as he could to stop Izzy from making a terrible mistake.

"Must be going to Izzy's for the night." Ms. Kamiya said.

… … … … …

Izzy sat back in the tub. His letters to his parents were in place, and everything else was prepared. All he had to do now was. . . Well, it was easy in theory, hard in practice. Izzy carefully got out the blade he had found in his dad's room. It was a simple razor, but it was sharp enough to get the job done. Izzy went into the bathroom. He lied back into the tub. It was like a bath, but wearing his clothes. And blood instead of water. He sighed, and tried to think of reasons not to. His parents and Digimon would be upset. But that didn't matter. His classmates and friends would be sad. But that didn't matter. Tai would be. . . . Izzy wasn't sure what Tai would be. He hope Tai would be sad, but he couldn't be sure. This fact saddened Izzy even further than he thought he could be. Izzy brought the blade up, holding it over his arm. Biologically, he could cut, bleed out, and then die. It would be fitting. And he did not care.

"Goodbye. . ." He slashed the razor down.

… … … … ...

Tai was running as fast as he could. He knew he didn't have much time. Soccer practice was let out early, and for good reason. It was raining cats and dogs. It was terrible. But Tai ran, not caring. He had to stop Izzy. Thank God for soccer. . . he made it to the Izumi apartment. He knew Mr. or Ms. Izumi would not be home. He ran right in.

"Izzy!" He called, but it was more than a call. Tai was desperate. He had to find Izzy before he did it. He had to tell him how he felt.

"Izzy! Answer me!" Tai called, going further into the house. No. . . he was too late. . . NO! HE COULDN'T BE! Tai ran through the house. He got to Izzy's room. He heard a sound. It was a dripping sound. Tai's search stopped along with his heart.

"No. . ." He walked into the bathroom, and opened the door. There by the bathtub, Tai could see the blood pooling. Tai sunk to his knees.

"No. . . Izzy. . . no . . ." It was over. Tai had lost. . . everything. . .Izzy was dead. . . Wait. . . Where was the body. . .?

"Tai?" The brunette heard. He turned around.

"Izzy!" Tai exclaimed, picking the red head up in a hug and swinging him around. Tai was overjoyed that Izzy was alive. He put Izzy down, and looked into his eyes.

"Izzy, I love you. I'm sorry I said those horrible things to you. I realize now that I do love you. I have for a long time now, but I was afraid to admit it. Can you please forgive me?" Tai asked. Tears sprang to Izzy's eyes, as Izzy's heart started to beat again.

"I forgive you Tai. . ." he whispered. Tai hugged him once more, even though Tai was soaking wet. Tai pulled back once more.

"I thought you had. . . done it." Izzy shook his head.

"I wanted to, or rather, I wanted to want to. But I couldn't. I just couldn't kill myself. . ."

"The blood?" Tai asked. Izzy looked behind him.

"I accidentally spilled some red shampoo when I got out of the tub. So I went into the back to get a mop to clean it up. Then you came in." Tai looked over and saw the shampoo bottle, still dripping the bright red liquid onto the floor. He laughed at his own Naiveté. He turned to Izzy.

"Izzy, will you. . . be my boyfriend?" Tai asked. Izzy smiled at him.

"No." Izzy said, sadly.

"What? Why?" Tai asked, confused.

"Just because I forgave you doesn't mean I can be with you. You hurt me Tai. You broke my heart. I can't expose myself like that again."

"Izzy, I know I hurt you, but I love you. I promise to make it up to you, even if it takes me my whole life." Tai promised. Izzy shook his head.

"I'm sorry." Izzy started to leave.

"Izzy please! Don't do this! Please don't make me regret it for the rest of my life because I realized too late!" Tai pleaded. Izzy hesitated. Tai could see his chance slipping away. Izzy was trying to excise Tai from his heart. He needed to speak in logic terms; or Tai's version of logic, at least. Tai got down on his knees in front of a surprised Izzy, and bowed his head. Tai had never done that to anyone. It showed Tai's level of commitment and humility he was willing to give to Izzy.

"Izzy, you once said you loved me. If now that is not true, and love is that fickle, then I will go into that bathroom, and slit my wrists. I don't want to live if love is not that strong." Tai looked up. Izzy had tears in his eyes, but didn't say anything.

"So be it." Tai said. He got up and solemnly went to the bathroom. He picked up the blade. Right before he was about to slash, he saw a hand reach out and grab his arm. He dropped the blade. The hand swung Tai around. Tai couldn't meet Izzy's eyes.

"Tai, look at me." Izzy commanded. Tai's gaze lifted to meet Izzy's. Both boys were crying. Hesitantly, he placed his other hand on Tai's cheek. They both could feel their hearts slowing down and speeding up at the same time. It was euphoria. Izzy leaned in and kissed Tai. It was a passionate kiss. It told each boy how much the other cared. It was a desperate kiss, and it was a loving kiss. They parted, and Tai looked into Izzy's dark gaze.

"Izzy?" Tai managed to get out.

"You said. . ." Izzy's voice sounded rough right then. "That God hates fags." Tai nodded, remembering.

"If so, then let me go to Hell. But it doesn't matter, as long as your there with me." Any other time, Tai would've caught how cheesy that was; but not now. Not with so much at stake.

"Izzy?" Tai repeated. Izzy hesitated.

"Every piece of logic I have tells me to run away. To leave you and not do this. . ." Tai looked down. "But I can't. I love you Tai Kamiya, and there's not a damn thing I can or am willing to do about it." Izzy kissed Tai again.

"Will you be mine Izzy Izumi?" Tai asked. This time, it was Tai putting himself up for hurt and rejection. Tai knew now it was what he wanted.

"I will Tai Kamiya." Izzy responded, then he smiled. That's when Tai knew Izzy had completely forgiven him. That Izzy wasn't afraid of Tai hurting him anymore. He always knew what Izzy was thinking. They were the perfect match. Izzy found himself lost in Tai's eyes again. They were a symbol of warmth, friendship, and now love.

"Stay here tonight." Izzy pleaded, suddenly tired. Tai nodded, then looked down.

"I'm kind of soaked." Tai said. Izzy nodded. He went over, and got Tai's spare set of clothing and gave it to him. Tai changed in the bathroom, while Izzy changed too. Izzy then climbed into the queen sized bed. Tai climbed in after him. Tai removed his shirt. Izzy soon followed suit. Tai wrapped his arms around Izzy as they kissed, and reveled in the feeling of their bare torsos pressing together. Izzy felt. . . safe. In Tai's arms, nothing could harm him. All he felt was love. Tai ran his tongue along Izzy's lips, begging for entrance. Izzy parted, and let Tai's tongue explore his mouth, and dominate over his tongue. After a while, they parted from kissing, and Tai just held him. from behind, pulling Izzy impossibly closer to him.

"Izzy. . . I . . . I was scared."

"I know Tai."

"But I don't know what I'd do without you."

"I know Tai."

"I promise that one day I will make it up to you." Izzy turned to face Tai.

"Just hold me. . . and promise to never let anything hurt me. Other than that, we'll figure the rest out." So Tai held him tight, in a warm embrace, safe from the outside. Tai had only one question:

"What about the others?" Izzy sighed.

"What about them?"

"We'll have to tell them." Izzy hesitated.

"Fine, but later." Tai nodded, sleepily.

"Ai shiteru Kou-koi."

"Ai shiteru Tai-koi." They then fell into the blissful oblivion of sleep within each other's arms.

Well, tell me what you think! I hope you liked! Review and alert if you want to see more.

All Flamers are thanked for making sure the review button works. Flames will be used to light the fire I write these stories by. Thanks!