I deserve this
It had been few years since Tala's confession of his feelings for Bryan. But to Bryan it seemed only like yesterday. He still had times he when couldn't believe how the things turned out to be. How on earth he could be so lucky to have someone like Tala loving him?
Bryan thought back at the time. He still wasn't sure if he deserved the love Tala brought into his life. After so many years of being unloved, he still wanted to be loved. So bad it almost choked him whenever he let the mask fall. The mask he had been gripping on for so many years. It hurt like hell to let go. For the first time in his life he felt helplessly vulnerable. And he wasn't used it. There were times he feared he was going to fall apart from the hurt and pain. Most hurtful part was that he couldn't tell anyone. He didn't have the words for the swirlpool of pain inside him.
Thankfully, thought Bryan, the all swallowing darkness has lifted upon him. There little light here and there instead pitch black darkness that once dwelled inside Bryan. The light bubbling in his stomach whenever he watched into Tala's blue eyes. The way his heart almost exploded from happiness whenever Tala touched him. The hot rush that send flames through his entire body when he kissed Tala's lovely, mellow lips.
Bryan rubbed his burning neck. Window reflected his image almost as clearly as a mirror would. He couldn't have noticed the difference any clear. His entire appearance had changed so drastically he barely knew himself. Skin was pale and rosy, eye alight and confident. He looked healthier than ever. Happier than ever. Maybe, after all he was worthy of all the good things. Gazing through the window to beautiful scenery to the Ural, he finally allowed himself to take it all that destiny had laid in front of him. I deserve this, he told to his reflection.