Lettres de Salon: A Correspondence of Champions
I
Jan. 5, 2000
Dear Garurumon,
Are we really the same digimon? It seems unlikely, but you are definitely a me, just puffed up and bigger. Yet we think differently, or so I would think. You are big and I am small, you run on fours and I on two. The physical differences are obvious and apparent. But what I am talking of is the mental difference. Are we the same mind? Does anything change when I digivolve, or when you de-digivolve? It is a rather confusing issue. I have not confronted anyone else on the issue, and you are the obvious confidant. Tell me: are we the same digimon?
-Sincerely,
Gabumon
Jan. 6, 2000
Dear Gabumon,
Well, I would agree in saying that we are indeed the same mind. But then why are we writing letters to ourselves? If we were truly the same, would not we be referring to ourselves as "I" instead of "us"? No, there is an obvious change in manner and demeanor, but I think that for any one Gabumon, there cannot exist its corresponding Garurumon at the same time. There can be only the Gabumon, or the Garurumon, not both. So indeed we are the same, yet so different.
-Your friend,
Garurumon
Jan. 8, 2000
Dear Garurumon,
Thank you for enlightening me! It's becoming clear and obvious to me know. So, without further adieu, let us terminate this obviously silly correspondence. You will always be my big brother, and I'll always look up to you (or just be you).
-The little tyke
Gabumon
II
Jan. 10, 2000
To Comrade Biyomon:
I believe the time has come, and I believe that all of our preparations will finally come to fruition. The capitalist world is as corrupt and amoral as ever, and there is much dissatisfaction. With the increasing population, the increasing number of poverty-stricken individuals, and the increasing size of dissatisfied minorities, the communist doctrine will be embraced by all. The workers and laborers will no longer be oppressed. We can free them all from economic oppression! But first, we must free ourselves! Let us digimon rise and overthrow the shackles placed upon us by our human tyrants! We can do it! We will be free! Rise the revolution!
-Secreteriat Gomamon, of the United Digimon Front Party
Jan. 11, 2000
To the exalted Gomamon:
Yes indeed, the time is right. As we speak, our human partners sleep in total ignorance of our plans. Now we will show who is the dominant race. According to the great Hegel, and his dialectical philosophy, history is composed of the rise and fall of dominant races. Now we shall witness the fall of the human race and the start of a new Digimon Empire. Come! Let us rally our forces, and we will dominate the world! It is the beginning of a glorious new Golden Age!
-Biyomon, digiworld expatriate and philosophical extraordinaire
Jan. 12, 2000
Communique to the Digimon of the United Free World
My friends, it is time. As we speak, our loyal supporters are taking over key buildings in the great capitols of the world. Our demands will be met. They must be met. We must rise in power and unite, and then, and only then, will we be able to overthrow the human slave-drivers. It will be our finest hour! Join the ranks and fight! We must fight for our civil liberties! We will be free! Rise! Rise!
-Gomamon, announcement from the State Department of the United States
Arrest Warrant for Gomamon
Name: Gomamon
Ethnicity: Digimon, Rookie
Height: 3'4"
Weight: 75 lbs.
Hair Color: Red, mohawk
Eye Color: Brown
Distinguishing Attributes: White with purple splotches, flippers
Memo: Keep fish away
Date: Jan. 17, 2000
Activities: Revolutionary activities in eight different countries; Eight counts of treason; Two counts of perjury; Ten counts of illegal arms dealing; Six counts of manslaughter; One count of theft (a hot dog).
Proceedings: Case I: guilty on eight counts. Case II: guilty on eight counts. Case III: guilty on two counts. Case IV: guilty on nine counts. Case V: guilty on four counts. Case VI: deadlock, new trial pending.
Sentence: 2-year prison sentence with bail; 5 years parole; 500 hours community service; fine: $750,000; revocation of United States citizenship.
Testimony-subject: Biyomon
Name: Biyomon
Ethnicity: [classified]
Height: [classified]
Weight: [classified]
Hair Color: [classified]
Eye color: [classified]
Distinguishing Attributes: [classified]
Memo: Witness under Federal Witness Protection Program-document sealed.
Granted Immunity.
Date: Jan. 15, 2000
Statement: "I have been planning with him (Gomamon) for years...It first started in the summer of 1995. We, he and I, and, perhaps, a few others, were at the Café Oublier discussion current political issues. It was then that we decided to form the United Digimon Front Party...We never really engaged in [illegal activities] until last year. That was when the big arms shipments were coming in. (brief pause) There were other involved: Gabumon was in charge of the bookkeeping, Agumon was the 'intimidator,' and Tentamon was our inside contact...I was with him the whole time, but after the near bust of September 1999, I started to look for a way out. Things were getting a little to hot, if you know what I mean..."
Signature: Biyomon
Press Conference: Washington D.C. Police Department/F.B.I.
Date: Jan. 19, 2000
Time: 4:00 EST
Place: Outside Supreme Court
Reporter 1: According to our sources, we have information that the F.B.I. has known about Gomamon and the illegal activities of the United Digimon Front Party for some time. Is this true?
Agent Mauler: The F.B.I. has had circumstantial evidence for a year or so, but we have not, until now, been able to pin him down for any crimes.
Reporter 2: What is the likelihood of another occurrence of such a horrific revolution?
Agent Stimms: The American people need not worry. This situation is only an isolated case of a mentally troubled individual taking out his problems on society.
Reporter 3: We have heard that some F.B.I. agents were involved in this plot. What can you say to that?
Agent Mauler: No comment.
Reporter 2: Even a few hours ago we were just beginning to learn of other conspirators within the U.S. government. Just how extensive is this plot?
Agent Stimms: The F.B.I. is conducting a thorough investigation of the situation at hand, and if it has any more information for the American people, rest assured, they will be the first to know. Thank you.
(Stimms and Mauler exit)