Disclaimer; I do not own it, any of it, this is a product of a sleep deprived authoress on a coffee high.
Harry took a deep breath and pushed the needle into his arm, he relished in the pain. It was his only comfort, the minor high giving him relief.
I hurt myself today,
to see if I still feel.
Harry sighed his thoughts on the pain, he had hoped the high would make it fade, but it didn't.
I focus on the pain,
the only thing that's real.
He felt it, the high, what helped him get over the war.
The needle tears a hole,
the old familiar sting.
Then he cried, remembering her, she who had died in the war, his love, his Ginny. He thought of their wedding, their short romance.
Try to kill it all away,
but I remember everything.
He imagined he was talking to her, it was his fault, she died for him.She died to save him on that fateful day, on the last day of Voldemort's life.
What have I become,
my sweetest friend?
They had died, every one he cared for. Even though he had tried to prevent it, it was still his fault.
Everyone I know,
goes away in the end.
He prayed, saying;
You could have it all,
my empire of dirt.
"Just give them back.." He stopped sobbing deeply. 'It didn't matter,' he thought bitterly, 'knowing me would have killed them eventually anyway.'
I will let you down,
I will make you hurt.
But, he wasn't allowed to end it, he had to fight until the new Dark Lord died, or killed him. They had made him royalty, or a condemned man.
I wear this crown of thorns,
upon my liars chair.
He was going crazy, his once perfect strategies were failing. No matter what he tried every move he made was countered.
Full of broken thoughts,
I cannot repair.
After so long, he was numb to so much, but not to this. This needle was his last hope.
Beneath the stains of time,
the feelings disappear.
He was stuck, the new Dark Lord was advancing, and he could do nothing.
You are someone else,
I am still right here.
He sensed Lucius behind him and said;
What have I become,
my sweetest friend.
Everyone I know,
goes away in the end.
And you could have it all,
my empire of dirt.
He turned to Him, the second bane of his existence, the new Dark Lord, Lucius,
I will let you down,
I will make you hurt.
Lucius's smirked, "You poisoned yourself." It wasn't a question.
If I could start again,
a million miles away,
I would keep myself,
I would find away.
Harry smiled as death came, it was his only relief. He could see her, and with his last breath he whispered quietly, "I'm sorry my love, I just couldn't wait."
A/N; Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I love Johnny Cash, The music, not the man, (Sorry). I had to kill Harry but I couldn't let Luci win so...