Chapter 1: Meeting Akatsuki

There was a loud thumping in between my ears. What was this? I was stood in front of two cosplayers, who were dressed as Hidan and Kakuzu. But when I said their cosplay was good, they just stared at me blankly. The Hidan cosplayer laughed, and said;

'...Cosplay? What the fuck is that?'

This confused me. Then the Kakuzu cosplayer turned his head, and said; 'Jinkûriki.' I followed his gaze, and sure enough, there was another cosplayer, dressed as Naruto Uzumaki. "Hidan" Grinned.

'Let's get that baby.' He growled, and launched towards "Naruto", "Kakuzu" in suit. I blinked. This was getting way too weird. Naruto turned, his eyes wide. Then I noticed. Their eyes were the same as in the anime, just the person themselves seemed real. I shook my head. This wasn't happening. Naruto's eyes turned red, and cat-like.

Wait. How could someone just do that? His canine teeth grew and he bore his teeth.

'Take me to Sasuke.' He growled. Wait. Being an absolute Narutard, I knew full well they don't know where Sasuke is. Even Sasuke's older brother, Itachi, doesn't know.

Naruto grew two tails. Shit. I had to do something. I lunged forwards, running as fast as my legs could take me, and stood in between the two Akatsuki members and the Konoha Jinkûriki.

'Wait! Stop this!' I yelled, and Hidan rolled his eyes.

'What the fuck do you want...' He growled.

'Naruto!' I turned to him, and he seemed shocked I knew his name, and his tails had disappeared. 'The Akatsuki don't know where Sasuke are!' Kakuzu shot me a dark look, as Hidan just looked confused.

'How do you know us?' He growled, and I looked at him.

'I watch the Anime, and read the manga.' There was a pause.

'The what...?' Naruto murmured, turning back to normal and staring at me blankly. Realisation hit me.

'Of course...' I whispered. 'You don't know... Do you know where you guys are?' Hidan and Kakuzu looked at each other, then back at me.

'...No...' They murmured simultaneously. I sighed.

'Let me come with you.' I said to Hidan.

'Wh- WHAT?' Kakuzu Blurted. Naruto turned and walked off.

'DUDE!' Hidan laughed, a low, rumbling noise. 'Leader-Sama might approve of another chick in the Akat-s-u-k-i.' Kakuzu hit Hidan's shoulder.

'You idiot.' He growled. 'He'd bloody kill her.'

'Look, guys.' I sighed. 'I'll explain to Leader-Sama, okay? I have a lot of intelligence on Akatsuki, so I know all of your members.'

'Okay, try it.' Hidan grinned. 'Red hair, looks like a stupid kid.'

'Sasori-no-Danna.' I replied.

'Shit... Okay then... Black hair, eyes like-'

'Itachi-kun.'

'... Ginger-'

'Pain-Sama.'

'Venus Fly Trap.' He simply said.

'Zetsu.' I grinned. He sighed.

'OKAY THEN! BLONDE HAIR! STUBBORN-AS ATTITUDE! LITTLE FUCKING GIT!'

'D- Deidara...' I replied hesitantly. Hidan looked at me for a moment then laughed again.

'You've gone fucking red!'

'I HAVE NOT!' I turned away from him with a "hmph". Hidan chuckled.

'You're cool.'

'I what?' I looked at him through my fringe. He was smiling.

'You're cool. No. You're awesome.' He turned to Kakuzu. 'CAN WE KEEP HER KUZU-KUN?' His eyes were wide and sparkly. I growled and whacked him on the head, and he slunk to the floor. Kakuzu chuckled.

'If she can keep you under control, yes.' He looked back at me. 'Do you have any special ninjutsu?'

'I uh... Well...' I sighed. 'No... I'm simply a stupid human being with no ninja skills at all.'

'Don't worry.' Kakuzu said, turning away from me and dragging Hidan by his cloak. 'Leader-Sama will teach you ninjutsu.' I stared at his back as he walked away. He stopped, and turned his head to look at me.

'Well?' He murmured. 'Are you coming?'

'Wha? Oh, uh. Yeah!' I trotted up beside him and followed him to where ever the Akatsuki were.

We stood in a field, and Hidan was sat in a high tree.

'Hey, guys?' He murmured, and me and Kakuzu looked up.

'What is it, fool?' Kakuzu growled.

'I don't see the Lair anywhere.' Hidan whispered, jumping out the tree.

'No, but when you see a ginger ninja, it's a little obvious, is it not?' I murmured, and pointed north, where there was a hill. On top of that hill, stood Leader-Sama, his cloak blowing in the direction of the wind. Hidan's eyes widened.

'LEADER-SAMA!' He yelled, and bounded like a small child who had just seen a cute puppy. Me and Kakuzu walked towards Pain slowly.

'He seems full of energy now.' I said to Kakuzu. Kakuzu grunted.

'It's because he made a friend.' He grinned at me from under his mask. 'It's not often Hidan gets one of those.' I laughed, and then we approached Pain.

'Leader-Sama.' Kakuzu murmured, and made a hand gesture towards me, even though we were stood behind him. 'This girl... She knows about Akatsuki.'

'Is that so...' Pain murmured, his back to us. His voice was deep and silky, and it sounded rather seductive. 'What is her name...?'

'U- Uhh...' I hesitated. 'R- Renai, sir...' (A/N: It's said Ren-Ay. Like how you would say "Hey". People always call me Ren-Eye. XD) What else was I meant to call him? I couldn't call him Leader!

'Renai...' Pain turned his head a little, but I couldn't see his face. 'Interesting...'

'Urm. Leader.' Hidan murmured. 'She has no ninjutsu or any of the likes. Could you teach her?' Pain turned his head and glared at Hidan.

'We are in more catastrophic moments than this.'

'Leader-Sama?' Kakuzu urged him.

'For one thing, we don't know where the hell we are.' Pain said, and now I could see half of his face. He was staring at me intently. 'And the other... Deidara's missing.'

'WHAT?' I blurted, then instantly covered my mouth. 'I- I mean...'

'Hahaha.' Hidan grinned. 'Sorry, Leader. I think Little Renai-Kun here has a little crush on Dei-Dei-Chan...'

'I DO NOT!' I roared, and aimed a punch at him, but I missed. 'And "kun"?'

'Your hair...' He wound my short, auburn, spiky hair around his finger. 'Is like a boys... Also...' He pointed at my chest. 'You're rather flat-chested.' I punched him around the face, this time succeeding.

'You bastard...' I growled. 'And Deidara Is... A boy...' I panted from my quick movement. It had apparently startled my body. Hidan stared at me.

'You're also... extremely strong...' He turned his head, and spat out a tooth.

'Whoops.' I murmured, and knelt down to him, as he was sat on the floor. 'Did I seriously hit you that hard?' He grinned at me.

'Okay then...' Pain murmured, and looked down at me. 'Renai... I will teach you ninjutsu.' I nodded, and Hidan's grin turned broader. 'Hidan... Kakuzu... You go off and search for Deidara.' Kakuzu nodded, then poofed. Hidan did the same after a few seconds. Pain turned to me and I stood up.

'Right...' He murmured. 'I'm not going to go easy on you.' I nodded.

'Understandable.'

'Good. Now. Punch me.'

'What?' I asked. This had confused me.

'Punch me. You won't hurt me.' Pain murmured. I hesitated, then threw a punch at him, but he ducked.

'You hesitated.' He pointed out. 'You must not hesitate when-' He stopped talking, because I had swung my leg round and aimed a kick at him. He caught my leg, though. He stared at me blankly and I smirked.

'You had your guard down.' I murmured, and put my foot back on the floor. 'Best time to strike.' Pain stared at me, then the corner of his mouth twitched.

'Good. How much do you know?'

'Not much. I know the hand signs for a fire-ball jutsu...' I pondered. 'And maybe a few others.'

'Fire-Ball Jutsu?' Pain mused. 'Only Uchiha can perform that perfectly.'

'Yeah...' I sighed. 'It's in their blood. If you're not Uchiha, it won't be as great.'

'Okay, so, give it a try.' Pain said softly. I could swear he was more vicious than this in the Anime... I nodded, and went through the numerous hand signs, then took in a deep breath, felt the chakra (That I had all of sudden) build into my chest, and released it all in one big blow. When I ran out of breath, thank god not chakra, I opened my eyes again, because they were squinted shut, and looked at Pain. He was staring at me slightly bemused.

'Are you sure you're not Uchiha?'

'I don't know...' I whispered, and looked down. 'I didn't even know I had chakra... That I was capable of that...' Pain stood in front of me, and lifted my chin up with his hand, then looked into my eyes, incredibly closely. My heart started beating faster. Thank god Konan wasn't here.

'Hmm.' He leant away again. Phew. I thought he was going to kiss me or something! 'Your eyes are black.'

'They are?'

'Yes.' He stared at me more. 'I think you have Uchiha blood in you. Best to get Itachi for that.' He turned away from me. 'Stay here.'

So I did so. I waited for about 10 minutes, and then Itachi sauntered across to me.

'Hello.' He said darkly. I looked at him in silence before whispering a faint "hi".

'So... Pain tells me that you might have Uchiha Blood in you...' He murmured. I stared at him. His eyes were black. That meant no genjutsu. Phew.

'I have no idea.' I murmured. If I was Uchiha, would I be related to Itachi? More importantly, how? 'I only just discovered I have chakra, let alone being Uchiha.' Itachi raised his head slightly.

'Do you know how to activate your sharingan if you have one?' He asked. I blinked at this. I actually didn't know.

'N- no... I don't.' Itachi's mouth twitched. Was he holding back a smile?

'Okay, close your eyes.' He murmured, his voice silky. I did so, and then I felt his hand on my shoulder. After a few seconds, I felt powerful. 'Open them.'

I opened my eyes, and Itachi's sharingan looked straight into mine. More importantly, I saw his chakra.

'Wh- Whoa.' I say in awe.

'Yes...' Itachi sighs. ;You have a Sharingan... You're Uchiha.'

'Oh my...' I whisper, and retract my sharingan. I look up at Itachi, and ask; 'What happened to Deidara?' Itachi's expression becomes slightly annoyed.

'I don't know.' He growled. 'Don't change the subject.'

'S- Sorry...' I whisper, and look away. 'I'm just curious, that's all...' Itachi sighs again.

'If you get better at ninja skills, perhaps you can help search for him.'

'He could be anywhere!' I yelp. 'He could be dead for all we know!'

'As I seem to remember;' Itachi's voice rose a fraction. 'You are not yet part of Akatsuki! That means Deidara shouldn't even be of your concern!' I look at the floor, and then Pain walked up behind Itachi.

'Relax.' He murmured. 'Renai, come with me.' I glance up at him, then nod and follow Pain.

'We found the lair...' Hidan murmured as we approached him. 'Well. Closest we'd get the fucking thing.'

'Hidan, watch your language.' Konan snapped. Hidan pulled a face, and Konan approached me.

'Hey.' She smiled. 'Ignore Hidan. He has no respect for anyone but himself.'

'And Jashin.' Hidan growled, turning into the large lair. Konan glared after him, then looked back to me.

'Well. Welcome to Akatsuki.' She murmured. 'I know you're not a proper member, but I expect as time goes by and you get better at Jutsu's and skills, you'll be one of us.' I smiled at her. At least she was nice.

So, for first impressions, Pain and Konan are the nicest people. Itachi's just dull and appears to hate me because I'm Uchiha. (I still find that strange to say.) and Hidan's mental. Kakuzu's nice, but he's easy to piss off. Pain led me into the lair, and took me up a set of stairs. He opened a door, and My eyes widened.

'You'll have to stay in here.' He murmured. 'Deidara's absent, so you can use his room. If he comes back, there's two beds, so there's no hassle.' I glanced down the hall briefly, and saw Kisame. He saw me, too.

'Do I know you?' He murmured, and I shook my head.

'Most likely not.' I decided I wanted to freak him out. Kisame's a nice guy, though. 'But... I know you.'

'Really...?' Kisame murmured. 'How so? Give me my own information.' He gave me a toothy grin.

'Okay then.' I grinned back at him. 'Kisame Hoshigaki, Comes from the Hidden Mist. Specialises in Water jutsu's, and that sword thing on your back has a name.' Kisame smirked.

'What's his name, then?' He murmured.

'Him? "it" would be more applicable. And it's name is Samehada.' Kisame laughed.

'Nice one, kiddo.' He looked at me softly. 'I think you'll be a great friend of-'

'KISAME SEMPAI!' Kisame's face dulled.

'Ah, hell no.' I turned, and immediately recognised the annoying childish man in an orange mask bounce towards us.

'Oh god.' I simply said. And Kisame laughed.

'Ooowwhhh!' Tobi Stared at me. 'Who are you, Sempai?'

'My name's Renai.' I murmured. 'You're Tobi, so don't bother introducing yourself to me.'

'YAY!' Tobi bounced on the spot. It's so hard to believe this fool is Madara... 'RENAI-SEMPAI KNOWS TOBI!' I sighed, and Kisame Face Palmed. Pain coughed.

'Tobi, stay with Renai.' He murmured, and whispered a quick "sorry" to me. 'Renai, I know you're not skilled, but Tobi is in fact rather powerful, and can teach you difficult ninjutsu. Plus, we need someone to step in for Deidara.' I nodded.

'No worries.' I hesitated. 'Same room?' I pointed into the disappeared artist's room.

'If it's okay with you.'

'Yep.'

Kisame smirked.

'I feel sorry for you, Rennie.'

'Rennie?' I laughed. Kisame grinned, but he was blushing.

'Y- yeah. I like to give people nick-names.'

'Oh.' I smiled. 'Can I call you Kisa-kun?' Kisame stared at me, then grinned again.

'Sure!'

Later on that evening, I was laid on my bed, apparently previously Deidara's, I knew this, because there were small chunks of wood missing from the bed. I rolled onto my side, and picked up one of the clay creatures on the bedside table. He was such a talented artist... I never considered it when watching the anime. It made me suddenly wonder if we had caught up with Shippuden, and Deidara had fought against Sasuke, and he self-destructed.

'Renai-Sempai?' Tobi murmured from across the room. I looked over at him. He had his back to me, and he was sat on the other bed with his head bowed.

'Yes, Tobi?' I answered, putting the creature back onto the table and sitting upright.

'Do... Do you think Deidara Sempai's coming back?' He murmured. I walked over to him, and sat next to him.

'I won't lie to you by saying he will.' I murmured, and he looked up at me. 'But I don't know. I don't even know his last name...'

'Sempai never told us.' Tobi replied. I looked at him, and despite he had a mask on, I could tell he was sad.

'Hey, don't fret.' I smiled at the masked man. 'Deidara's fine, I'm sure of it.' Tobi raised his head a little.

'You think so?' He murmured.

'Of course!' My gaze turns soft, and I stare at a clay bird on a shelf. 'He's probably just out getting inspiration for his art.'

'Boy...' Tobi said, standing up. 'You sure know a lot about Deidara.'

'Yeah...' I hesitated. 'I also know a lot about you, so you can cut the Tobi act, yeah?' I looked up at the older man, and he stared down at me.

'What do you mean?' He asked. I knew he was going to be tough. I lowered my voice, and stood beside him, leaning next to his head and whispering into his ear.

'Like I know that you're just pulling an act on Akatsuki. You're lying to them.'

'Tobi doesn't lie.' He growled, but his voice was deeper. I was apparently winning.

'Tobi? Tobi's a fake.' I stepped away from him, and tapped his mask. 'Under this mask is none other than-' A knock on the door interrupted me.

'Rennie?' I turned, and Kisame popped his head around the door.

'Kisa-kun?' I murmured. Kisame grinned at me.

'I think we're on Deidara's tail.'

'W- Whoa. That fast?' Tobi murmured.

'We haven't found him yet.' Kisame continued. 'but it's looking good. Our Akatsuki dog has caught onto his scent.'

'Whoa. Wait. Akatsuki Dog?' I chuckled. Kisame laughed.

'Yeah.' Kisame smirked. 'Come on, you two.'