"I dont know if i got to see what i wanted that day. If i expected him to look better or worse. All i know is that when i saw his eyes all of that went away. When i saw him there what did i expect to see? I did though and I matched his sadness with anger. Anger at him for leaving me ,anger at him for not saying goodbye. And anger at myself for not saying I love you. Soon enough."
This part was basically what i was trying to revolve the whole story around. It's her direct quote.
I walked to the other side of the house where Max and Amy were standing arguing.
"I think I might get going." She said dissapoited.
"Are you sure?" Amy asked.
"Yeah." She said.
Just then the door opened and Tyler was standing in the door way.
"Cinnamon." He said smiling recalling the old nickname. She couldn't even say anything. She just smiled back. She walked toward him slowly and cautiosly.
He hugged her and held her tight. She was crying embarrasingly.
When she pulled away she was surprised to see his eyes glazed over. She pulled her bangs out of her face and said,
"God." She lauged.
"I haven't seen you in like years." She said and he smiled.
Amy nudged Max smiling.
They all sat around talking and laughing for some hours.
When Manny looked at her watch she wasn't surprised to see it was late. She sighed.
"Crap,I think I should get going. I told the rents i'd be back by 7." I said. "Aw,Already." Max sad popping another beer open. I nodded. Then her phone rang. She sighed it was Lissa.
"Hello?" She answered.
"Manny where the heck are you? Your mother just called." Lissa said practically yelling. They had become better friends this year.
"What did you say?" She asked.
"I told her you and I were at wal-mart and you got lost. Turn on your cell she'll be phoning you any second." Lissa warned.
"Okay thanks." She said and hung up.
"Bingo." She said.
Amy put her arm around her and said, "Come back okay." Manny nodded. They hugged each other. Tyler got up. Windy got nervous not knowing how she was gonna say goodbye. He put his arm around her and asked, "Mind if I accompony you?"
I nodded.
"Catch you guys later." I said picking up my booksack.
"Bye." Max said.
They walked away his arm around her shoulders.
She sighed and looked down. Sad by this day having to end.
When they neered the bus station where the cabs were lined up. He sighed and wouldn't meet her eyes.
"What are you gonna do?" Tyler asked.
"I don't know yet. My parents would kill me after the whole 'wild stage'" she said smiling. "Sorry about that are you still on lockdown?'' He asked smiling. "Yeah." she said simply "Sorry." He apologized again.
"Don't be that was the most fun I've ever had." She said recalling that year when they'd gottan togethere. He changed her completly. She went from shy and reserved to wild and loud. That summer they ran off. No one knowing anything but Lissa. She had never felt so alive. She hadn't seen him since they got arrested that summer.
"Am I gonna see you again?" She asked.
"Do you want to?" Tyler asked.
"Yes." She said exasprated. The sun was setting.
"I missed you." He said.
"Me too." She said tears welling again.
"Tyler you have no idea how hard it was when you left. I've spent this whole year wondering if i was ever gonna see you again. " She said calmly. "Then I heard about what happened to you and it killed me that I couldn't be there with you." She practically yelled. He looked away.
"Im sorry. You know if I could I would've stayed but I couldn't let you ruin your life because of me. You needed to get your life back on track. " He said and turned to her.
"I care about you too much to see you ruin your life. I never stopped loving you." He said. She was crying.
"I love you." She said. She wiped her eyes and smiled. She nodded.
"I'll see you again okay?" He said and smiled at her. She nodded her throat was dry she wanted to cry.
He kissed her and all of the memories came flooding back.
"You will see me again." She said.
"Good."
They walked to the cabs. He opened her door and said.
"Take care."
"You too."
She sighed and closed the door. She looked back.
"Where to?'' the cab guy asked.
"Earline dr. in Brookes Village."
She said remembering Lissa's adress. There were tears in her eyes.
It was a 30 minute drive.
Her phone rung.
"Mom?" She said.
"Where are you?" her mom asked angrily.
" Wal-Mart." She said.
"What did I tell you?" She practically yelled.
"It's just wal-mart." She said agravated.
" Be back beefore 9. " He mom said and hung up.
It was 8 she was sure she had enough time.
"How much?" She asked the cab driver when they pulled up to Lissa's driveway.
"60." He said. She payed him and got out.
"Thank you." she said.
She dialed Lissa's number.
"Hello?" She asked.
"Hey,Im outside." She said.
"Im comin. Bye." She hung up.
"Hey chick need a ride?" Lissa asked coming out. Manny nodded smiling.
"Let me get my mom's keys." She said and ran inside.
Manny sighed. She didn't know why but she was nervous about getting home. About telling Lissa what happened.
"Come on." Lissa said.
"So where ya been?'' She asked once they were in the car.
"If I tell you promise not to scream exitedly,yell at me agrily,or kill me?"
Manny asked.
"Can I ask questions?" Lissa asked confused.
"Depends on the questions." Manny said.
"Okay fine I promise. Now spill." Lissa said exitedly.
"I went down to Brownsville." Manny started.
"What! Why?" Lissa yelled.
"Lissa." Manny warned.
"I went to see Tyler." She said.
Lissa didn't say anything. Manny knew she wanted to yell.
She cleared her throat and asked,"What happened?"
"I found his sister and Max and him." She said catiously.
"Oh. Manny please can I scream?" She asked.
"Fine." She said and sighed.
"Oh my god. Oh my god!! How is he? What happened. Obviously your mom doesn't know! Oh my god!" She yelled her hand on the steering wheel. She let out long breath.
"Oh my god." She finished looking at her.
"He's fine mostly. Nothing happened we talked. Obviously my mom doesn't know! She'd kill me." She yelled.
"What are you gonna do?" Lissa asked.
"I don't know." Manny said quietly.
Lissa took a sharp turn and soon they were at Manny's house.
All the lights were on. Manny sighed and took off her seat belt.
"Gotta figure it out Manny. I'll talk to you tommorrow. Kay?" She said.
"Yep. Bye. Thanks for the ride." She said and got down.
She walked towards the door and sighed.
"Little late." Her dad said.
"I know sorry." She apologized and went to her room.
She turned on the music and TV. And went to her drawers she pulled out a black box that had been signed by everyone she knew last year. She opened it and sighed. Pictures of her and Lissa before she had dyed her hair black and red. Then there were pictures of her and Trsiten. Her and Adaire, Alexandra,Theresa,Maria,and some of the guys that were on the basketball team before she got togethere with Tyler. Then down at the bottom were pictures Tyler had drawn,lyrics to a song. Poems she had written. Pictures of them at a concert. Picures of them partying. Pictures that Lissa had taken of them togethere when they had crashed on her living room floor when they had all gone out partying. Then there was there notes that he had written her and the letter he had sent her after that summer. There was the necklace he had given her. She pulled out the letter and began reading.
Dear, Manny .Samantha. I don't have much to say but I miss you. I hope you get this. Im sorry about what happened. I know your probably in a hell lot of trouble. Manny. If I don't get to see you again I hope you know that I love you. Your the first person I've ever fallen in love with. I don't think I've ever cared about anyone more than I care about you. You need to get back to you life. I'll always love you no matter what. Princess.
Tyler.
She read it once. She cursed herself quietly then remebered that night after they had gotten caught.
Her parents dragged her out of the station almost immediatley her mom had started yelling.
She didn't say anything at the beggining.
"Calm down. Wait till we get home." Her dad had told her mom.
She was dreading going in. Jail had felt better than home did that night.
"Samantha Yoanna Jestra!" Her mom yelled.
Manny sat down on the couch she looked around her house had changed the 4 bedroom 2 story house was nothing she had missed.
"I don't know if you understand the gravity of the situation! You ran away with that boy! Got arrested! And who knows what else! Samantha you could've gotten yourself killed! Or worse! Where the hell were you!?" She yelled. Her dad didn't say anything.
"Are you gonna say anything!?" Her mom yelled.
Manny didn't say anything she didn't even blink.
"Okay then. Your grounded permanently till I say other wise. If you sneek out or anything else you wont even be in this city. Also your prohibited to see that boy. After school you come straight home."
"What!?" Manny yelled.
"You heard me!" Her mom countered.
"Im not gonna stop seeing Tyler!." She yelled.
"Yes you will or like I said you wont even be in this city! Do you want that?" Her mom yelled.
"I don't care." Samantha yelled.
"Go to your room!" Her mom yelled.
"If you haven't noticed I don't care what you say anymore. If I did I would've come home a long time ago."She yelled. Her mom didn't say anything.
"Hey. Hey!" Her dad yelled.
"That's enough." He said.
She didn't know what to do she didn't wanna stay home.
She got up and went to the door.
"You walk out that door and I swear to you Samantha you'll be in boaridng school faster than you can say anything." Her mom warned.
She considered it for a second but decided she wasn't staying. She was not gonna let her parnts run her life.
She walked out. Leaving her mom speechless.
"She'll be back. That boys still in prison and she has nowhere to go." Her dad said.
Manny ran out of the Villa. She stopped when she neared the street where cars were passing by. The city lights ilumanated the whole place. She went by the school. The only place she knew would be alone and slumped against the school bulduing. She started crying. She didn't know what she was doing or what she was gonna do. She didn't know if she was ever gonna see Tyler again or what was gonna happen with her after that night. She didn't go home that night. She stayed behind the builduing until she saw the sun rising. She flipped open her phone and dialed Lissa. The only person she had called while she was with Tyler.
"Hello?" A sleeppy Lissa answered.
"Lissa?" Manny said.
"Oh my god !Hi! Where are you? Are you okay? You haven't called me in weeks!" Lissa said now fully awake.
"Yeah,Im fine. I guess. I got arrested and dragged home." She exlained.
"So your home?" Lissa asked dissapointed.
"No. I ran out. I don't know what do." She said her voice calm.
"It sounds so movie. Come to my house? My parents are gone. Wait let me make sure." Lissa said and went downstairs to find the house empty. She sighed she had practically spent the whole summer alone or with friends.
"Yepp. Im alone." She said.
"Thanks Lissa." She said and hung up.
She picked herself up and walked all the way to Lissa wich was actually farther than she expeceted.
She rung the doorbell Lissa was still in her shorts and tank that she slept in.
"Oh my god hi!" She said and hugged her.
"Missed me?" Manny asked.
"Yes!" Lissa yelled practically.
"Come on." She said and Manny followed her up. Her house was about as big as Manny's but it was practically a replica of the Italian home Lissa's parents owned in Italy.
They talked for awhile knowing that Manny needed to disrtact herself. They finnally sat in by the counter in the home bar they had. Lissa brought cereal and then she asked, "What are you gonna do Manny? I mean you just got back theres like 4 weeks till school starts I don't wanna start with out you. So it would suck if you got shipped off."
"If I go back Im dead." She said.
"They'll send the cops again." Lissa warned.
"I know. Don't worry I wont get you in trouble." Manny said.
"Im not." Lissa said.
"I guess Im just gonna stick it out till the 48 hours are up and the cops show up at my house." Manny said.
"Good luck." Lissa said.
"Do I have any clothes here?" Manny asked.
"Oh yeah. You have your own closet space." Lissa said laughing.
"Thanks. Can I-?" Lissa interrupted her.
"Bathrooms all yours. Leme show you where your stuff is." Lissa said and got up.
"I don't know how I got so lucky to have a friend like you." Manny said walking up the stairs behind Lissa.
"Neither do I." She said and laughed.
Time passed faster then it should've she decided to go home earlier than she had decided of.
"You know could've stayed here." Lissa said.
"I know. Thank you Lissa." She said and hugged her.
"Anytime. Good luck kay?" She said.
"Thanks." She left.
It was 8 a'clock. The summer air made it harder for her to breath. She started walking home wich wasn't that far.
She was surprised to see cop cars outside. She knew it wasn't regualtion to look for a missing person after 48 hours.
She sighed and entered. All eyes were on her. 2 cops were standing and her mom was sitting down in a chair.
"Samantha." Her mom said and stood up.
"This is your daughter?" The cop said her mom nodded.
"Mind sitting down." One of the cops said.
"Can I stand up?" She asked.
"Away from the door please." The other one said.
She groaned and rolled her eyes.
" Fine." She said and sat down.
"Samantha what are you thinking?" Her mom asked clamly.
"That Im tired of you running my life." She said.
"Okay, ma'm usually when runaways are reported they are arrested." The officer explained.
Manny didnt say anything. She just stared wondering if her mother would actually let her get thrown in jail.
"Considering this is her second offense. We're gonna need to take her in." He added.
"I understand officers." She said and faked sadness. She could tell.
Manny got up. The officers quickly looked at her.
"Just get it over with." She said to them and then looked at her mom. The officer grabbed his handcuffs.
"Against the wall." He told her. The officer handcuffed her and grabbed her arm.
"Samantha." Her mom said and shook her head.
"Like you care." Manny let slip out.
"That's enough." The officer said.
"You'll be informed of her court date." He told her.
He led her outside towards the car. She wasn't afraid. She was madder than scared. She knew the drill. Her court date was set for 2 weeks.
There she was sentenced to house arrest for 6 weeks and 2 weeks in the juvenile dilenquent center.
She came out if with hatred towards her mom. She sighed. She hated remebering that.
Manny went downstairs to see if if there was anything to eat. She was surprised to see her dad reading the newspaper in the kitchen.
"Dad." She said
"Hey. What are you looking for?" He asked
"Food ." She said simply. He nodded.
She made herself a sandwich and sat down across her from her dad. She almost never talked to her dad.
"Why'd you get home so late?" He asked
"I got lost in Wal-Mart." She said and took a bite of her sadwich.
He nodded.
"How are you doing in school?" He asked.
"Badly." She said defeated.
"Why?" He asked.
"I don't know." She said simply.
"Manny you have to get into college." He said.
"Dad,can I ask you something and promise me not to get mad?" She asked.
He nodded and put the newspaper down.
"I don't know if I wanna go straight to college. I haven't even figured out what Im gonna do." She said.
"Manny you know what your mom thinks about that." He said.
"Yes,I know but I don't want to go." She said carefully.
He sighed.
"Manny after this past year I don't really think there's much room for arguing." He said.
"Dad,I did that for the same reasons. Im tired of mom controlling my life." She argued quietly.
"You took it too far, Manny you have to agree though." He said.
"A bit too far." She agreed.
"Manny, decide what your gonna do then tell me. I'll be behind you with everything you do." He said.
"Thanks dad." She said and finished her sandwich.
"Mm-hmm." He said and picked up his newspaper again.
She got up and went back to her room. The music blaring she slid down her closed door.
She put her head down and sighed. Tears were welling up in her eyes.
The day kept repeating in her mind. She remebered when Amy had called her and told her about Tyler almost killing himself. A drug overdose apparently. It had almost killed her not being able to be with him. Her mom prohibited her from even stepping out of the house it had take 2 months for her to be able to go friends houses. She still couldn't drive and mail was diretly brought to her mother. She felt like she was in prison. Juvenile had felt better.
Her phone rang it was Alexandra.
"Hello?" She answered.
"Hey, Sam what are doing?" Alexandra asked .
Manny stood up and turned down the music.
"Nothing just here. You?"
"Same. What you doin tonight?" She asked.
"Probably nothing. Im still on curfew remeber?" Manny said.
"Oh right never mind. Ima see you Monday. Bye chick." Alexandra said.
"Bye.'' She said and hung up.
She had never been the kind to fall in love. She laughed at the others who did. She had never been the kind to care about other people or what other people thought about her. Partially from what her mom had taught her. She didn't have much affection growing up and showing it other people was hard. She never changed for anyone. She was her own person. She was always thought of as the good girl,the quiet girl,the smart one,or the brat,the spoiled one that didn't give most people even the time of day.She had been trying to change that since she was in middle school but never could.
Then came Tyler. The guy that had spent a year in Juvenile. The guy that ignored all the preps and all the emo wannabes and for some reason looked at her. She had ignored him knowing that he was proably just toying with her and just wanting to get laid. She wasn't gonna let him have the satisfaction. She ignored him and for some reason he kept coming back.
Tyler was different he didn't fit in. He was too wild to be one of the emo boys not to mention his hair was completly different. He had relativley long hair kind of that rocker look. He was too laid back to be one of the stoner ones. He did some drugs though. He didn't like the preppy girls for some reason. Every guy drooled over the preps no matter how emo they were. He was way too dark though. He was always reading but he was far from smart.
"Rumor has it Tyler has a thing for you." Madeline one of the preps came over one day to where her, Lissa and Alexandra were sitting talking.
She looked up.
"Yeah. Who says that?" She asked.
"Well I can tell." She said.
"Great. " She said sarcastically.
"So you want me to get you two together?" She asked.
Manny shook her head.
"No. Im not interested in anyone right now." She explained.
"Kay." Madeline said and walked away flipping her blonde hair.
"He likes you Sam." Alexandra said.
"Yeah, Manny he seems cool. I've talked to him he's wild kinda like you." Lissa said.
"Me?" She asked and laughed at the thought.
"Give him a chance." Alexandra said.
She shook her head.
"I'll think about it." She lied.
Nex day in class Tyler attempted to talk to her.
He sat behind her in Algebra.
"Samantha stop doodling and pay attention." The algebra teacher said.
"Samantha. Nice name." He said whispering behind her. He had a deep voice it almost gave her goosebumps.
"Thanks." She said sarcastically.
"Time of day?" He asked.
"Tyler is it?" She asked smiling sincerly.
"Yeah." He answered slowly. She looked at him accusingly.
"Im not trying to agravate you. Intentionally that is. " He said and smiled.
She sighed.
"Must I repeat my name?" She asked smiling.
"No need princess." He said then the bell rung. She shoved her books in her bag.
"I hate it when people call me that." She said and zipped her bag.
"Sorry." He said.
"That's okay it's not the first time." She said agravated.
"So what am I gonna see you around?" He asked.
He was putting an effort to get to know her she gave him that.
"Probably." She said and smiled roliing her eyes as she walked away.
How dumb did he think she was?
She got up from the floor and picked up the phone. She was dialed Maria's number. An old friend whom shed known since kindergraden.
"Hello?" A voice said after only two rings.
"Maria?" Manny asked carefully.
"No friggin way!" Maria yelped instantly recognising Manny's voice.
Manny laughed nervously and said,
"Whats up?"
"Nothing just here. This is so weird I haven't heard from you in ages. Or years. What have you been up to?" She asked exited.
"Oh nothing much just here. Theres so much I wanna tell you." Manny said.
"Well spill." Maria urged.
Manny sighed and then started,
"Well this summer I got arrested for running away with this guy that i think im in love with and then i got sent to juvenile for running away for like a day and now im confused because i think i love him but i don't want to believe that i love him because i think im too young to fall in love." Manny said her voice desperate.
"Aw,sweetie that's um,wow. And why didn't you call me any sooner?
Everyone has to fall in love Sammy. Atleast once in their lives but your time seems a bit complicated. What's his last name?" Maria said quickly.
Manny chuckled,
"Sorry but I've been pretty caught up for awhile now. He's not society wise and thats one of my problems." Manny said quietly
now.
"That sucks but you like him alot? And...
that's all i could come up wit so far..
review and be brutal
"Relapsing"
Last call at the hospital
You slept through it all
And these four walls warn you
That your surgery, it might not be the key
To fix the memory of you and me
Doctor I don't know what I've done
There's more to this than my
Ex-love and my ex-limbs could ever in my life begin to explain
Everytime I think of her and what went on that night
I don't see it, instead i hear it
A song so awful and so perfect
Last call at the hospital
You slept through it all
And these four walls warn you
That your surgery, it might not be the key
To fix the memory of you and me
Doctor I don't know what im gonna do
I need this song to be shouted out
And to be heard by everyone
Its like each word and every chord refuses to be ignored
This is bigger than me
But with no hands and even less skill
I don't know how it ever will come out
Doctor I think it's her I hear
It's always been
But if this pain can be arranged
In such a way to bring out beauty
Then, well, who am I to stop it?
I'll bring her back and I won't stop until it's done
Until this nightmare's undone
I need her
Last call at the hospital
You slept through it all
And these four walls warn you
That your surgery, it might not be the key
To fix the memory of you and me
I need her
I need this
The saddest songs can sing themselves, and just sing along
So if death's the answer, then the question is the trigger
And I'm just the firing pin.
Yeah I'm just a messenger
So if death's the answer, then the question is the trigger
And I'm just the firing pin.
And I'm just a messenger
Doomed to detonate on delivery
Last call at the hospital
You slept through it all
And these four walls warn you
That your surgery, it might not be the key
To fix the memory of you and me
Last call at the hospital
You slept through it all
And these four walls warn you
That your surgery, it might not be the key
To fix the memory of you and me.