'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a single soul was stirring—but wait! What's that sound?
A shadowy figure slips in the door with care
In hopes that she doesn't disturb the girl who sleeps there
Alex was nestled very snug in her bed
While monologues and summations danced through her head
And Olivia laid her coat down, and quietly, with a snap
Wraps her newly bought present up with Christmas tree wrap
When out on the terrace there arose such a clatter
Alex springs from her bed to see what is the matter
Away, to the window, Liv runs with a dash
She tears open the shutters and draws a gun with a flash
The moon on the breast of New York's fallen snow
Gave the luster of mid-day to objects below
When, to Liv's eyes did appear
A wide eyed perp, holding an eight pack of beer
With twitchy movements, so lively and quick
Liv knew in a moment he was… hammered
More rapid than eagles his shouting did came
And he whistled, and shouted and screamed out some names
"Now Dasher! Now, Dancer! Now, Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! On, Cupid! On, Donner and Blitzen!
To the top of the porch! To the top of the wall!
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!"
As dry leaves that before a hurricane fly,
Alex was at the window too, shocked and sleepy-eyed
As the perp climbed the fire escape and tried to get inside
With his eight pack of beer (he reeked of urine too)
And then, in an instant, Alex let out a yelp
She glanced at Olivia and called Elliot for help
Olivia loaded her gun and was turning around
When the perp hopped through the window with a loud crashing sound
He was dressed in work clothes, from his head to his foot
And his clothes were all tarnished from the ally and soot
The eight pack of beer he flung over his back
(He broke Alex's favorite vase—she wasn't happy about that)
His eyes were very bloodshot and not very merry
His cheeks smeared with dirt, his nose wet and smeary
His droopy little mouth was crooked in a smile
And the scraggly white beard on his chin was as white as road-snow
Olivia tackled him and he gritted his teeth
"Who is this woman?! Get'er offa me!"
He had a broad face and an impressive beer belly
It shook when he struggled, like a bowlful of jelly
Liv cuffed him right proper, and sat him by the bookshelf
Alex laughed when she saw him, in spite of herself
A twinkle in her eye told Liv she had nothing to fear
Except perhaps, projectile beer
The perp spoke not a word when Elliot showed at the door
El winked at Liv and Alex, and helped sweep up the floor
And grabbing the drunkard up with a rather rough jerk,
He grinned at the lovers and dragged off the perp
Alex sprang from her spot into Olivia's arms
"Don't worry Alex; I'll keep you safe from harm."
Olivia handed her the gift she had wrapped
And Alex tore it open, surprised at the craft
Of a twisted silver necklace (L&A on the back)
She threw her arms 'round her girlfriend and kissed her
Saying "Merry Christmas, Olivia, I love you."
Goodnight.
Merry Christmas everyone! I hope you all have a great holiday, and are not disturbed by a drunken pseudo-Santa coming in your window. I had to use some slant rhymes here, hope you don't mind…
Merry Christmas again, and have a great time!
Love, Raine