hope you enjoy lmao this is funny well i think it is lol

disclaimer: i do not own twilight 'sigh' :(


Chapter One

Bpov

I Have Been A Vampire For Almost 2 Years Now And Man Are These Vampires Crazy I Thought They Were Bad When I Was Human Man Was I Ever Wrong The Things They Have Been Putting Me Threw Except For Of Course My Loving Husband Edward.

Man The Things I Love About Him. Its Almost To Good To Be True. Who Knew I Would Be Spending Everyday Of My Life With Such A Amazing Lover Oh And Was He Ever 'big.' I Started To Smile

To Myself When Alice Walked In

"hey Bells.. What You Doing" She Asked

"Nothing Just Thinking To Myself About Some things" I Smiled Then Started To Laugh She Looked At Me So Weird

"And What Were You Thinking Of " She Asked

Just To See Her Face I Started To Tell Her What About " Well I Was Just Thinking How I Could End Up With Such An Amazing Lover Like Edward" I Looked At Her, She Was Smiling At Me For Some Strange Reason

"what" I Asked Her

"well The Boys Get Back Tonight And I Was Thinking" She Paused

"yes" I Wanted To Know What The Hell She Was Thinking Knowing Alice It Could Be Anything Man Did I Know It.

"okay Well Don't Get Mad At Me But I Was Thinking We Could Go Out Clubbing Tonight It Would Be So Much Fun" She Smirked

" And Why Would We Do That" I Asked As If I Was Stupid Or Something Of Course She Would Want To Go Clubbing This Was Alice We Were Talking About And She Knew I Hate Dancing Even Though I Was Good At It Now For Some Strange Reason Being A Vampire And All

All Of A Sudden We Seen Rose Come Down The Stairs Yelling " Now What Is This About Clubbing I Hear" She Asked Excited

" Well I Was Thinking All Of Us Could Go Clubbing Tonight So We Could Party Then Come Home And" She Paused To Look At Me And Rose " See I Am Bored We Always Do The Same Things Over Again And Its Starting To Get One My Nerves So I Was Thinking We Haven't Had Any Fun In A While So I Wanted To Play A Couple Of Games" She Had The Biggest Smile On Her Face Man I Knew Where This Was Heading

" What Type Of Games" I Eyed Her Know I Was Not Going To Like What I Hear

" Spin The Bottle And Truth Or Dare"

" Alice You Know What Happened Last Time Right " Rose Asked

" Yeah I Wasn't Born Yesterday" She Smiled

" Yeah But It Was Fucking Funny Seeing The Guys Like That" Rose Started To Laugh

We All Looked At Each other Then Started To Laugh"and This Time We Are Going To Get Them Drunk" She Started To Laugh So Hard I Thought She Was Going To Explode

"Alice You Know Something That Sounds Like Fun" I Said

She Looked At Me Like I Was Crazy Then Started To Laugh Again

" So Call The Boys And Tell Them Were Going Out Then We Are Going To Go Get Dressed Into The Sexiest Outfits I Just Bought These New Clothes Oh Man Yummy " Rose Said And Started Laughing, Alice Clapped Her Hands And Jumped Up And Down " We Only Have 2 Hours Before They Get Home"

" Oh Shit Okay I Totally Forgot We Only Had 2 Hours I Hope That's Enough Time" She Paused " Yeah That Will Be Enough Time" She Laughed

"come On Bella We Have To Get Ready" Rose Said Why Pulling Me Off The Couch

Apov

I Picked Up My Cell Phone And Dialed Jasper's Number Hoping He Had His Phone On It Rang 3 Times Before He Picked It Up

"hey Babe" He Said

"hey I Just Wanted To Call You Guys To Tell You Were Going Clubbing Tonight And Then Were Are Going To Play Truth Or Dare And Spin The Bottle"i Said Smliing To Myself

"okay Um... Hold On" I Heard Him Yell At The Other 2 And They Agreed Knowing They Would I Started To Laugh

" Hello You Still There Stop Hitting Each other And Talk To Me" I Screamed Into The Phone

" Oh Sorry... Okay Were On Our Way Okay See You Soon I Love You"

"i Love You To" I Said As I Was Shutting The Phone

"man Is This Going To Be A Great Night" I Said To Myself Knowing That It Would Be I Ran Up The Stairs To Start To Get Ready.

Jpov

" Why Did We Agree To This" I Asked Looking At Edward And Emmett " We Do Know This Is Alice Wanted To Play God I Love Her But Remember What Happened Last Time"

I Could Feel The Worry In Them But Still Had Smirks On There Face "because We Didn't Think When You Ask Maybe You Should Of Realized Before You Asked Us" Edward Said

"well I Thinks It Is A Great Idea "Emmett Said And Started To Laughing" Hell It Will Be So Much Fun Maybe We Can Get Strip Poker In There Too" She Said And Started To Laugh Even Harder

" Yeah Cause Everyone Wants To See You Naked Right" I Said Sarcastically

"damn Straight Come On We All Know You Picture Me Naked When Alice Is Sucking Your Dick" He Laughed Even Harder

" You Wish Buddy I Rather See 2 Dogs Fucking Then See You Naked" Laughing To Myself

"Emmett Stop Picturing 2 Dogs Fucking Its Very Disturbing" Edward Said And Slapped Him Up Beside His Head I Could Fell Edward Was Very Disturbed By This So I Knew He Wasn't Lie

I Sighed To Myself Knowing This Was Going To Be A Long Night But Emmett Did Have A Good Idea About The Strip Poker Then We Could See Alice Naked Yes!! I Thought To Myself And Started To Picturing Alice Naked Bent Over The Couch

"Jasper" Edward Screamed " Stop Picturing Alice Bent Over The Couch I Don't Want To See My Sister Bent Over The Couch...thank You Very Much" He Stated And Started To Run Towards The Car.

Im sorry if you hate it but please review hehehehehe 2 dogs fucking lmao that's the funny shit right there lmao