The Tourists Guide to the Realm of the Avatar
(The Voyage of Eduard)
Chapter 1
Eduard had floated out in the cold northern currents of the Mid Atlantic for a week in a scarlet red Fiat 500 he had rented from the fine folks at Budget Rent A Car at the Reykjavik Airport. He had decided to visit Iceland as a part of his grand tour of Europe. He lived in Europe as the son of French music teacher (his father) and and ex patriot Estonian artist (his mother). His grand tour had consisted of seeing the bits of Europe he had not been dragged to see by parents interested in providing him with a well rounded education and that meant a romp through Iceland to see the savage volcanic landscapes and snowmobile on glaciers followed by a romp through Scandinavia.
No one had told him traveling alone through a volcanic country in spring in a small Italian designed compact car would prove dangerous until a mudslide set off by a small volcano washed his car out to see. The Fiat tumbled off the sole main highway that ran around the whole island, down a steep rocky embankment and landed in the ocean. The airbags detonated as Eduard hit the ocean and then the strong currents washed him out to sea.
He had spent a week bobbing up and down with the waves hoping some passing ship would pick him up and give him something other than Icelandic shark jerky to eat and a few pints of bottled water and Gatorade to drink. He had rehearsed the speech he would give when interviewed by the news media and he even threw in a special thanks for the British Navy in case they found him.
He had nearly run out of shark jerky which came as a relief. He decided to sleep since the salt water had taken out the electronics that made the radio and lights operate and the sky had begun to grow dark which usually meant night had begun to fall. In the North Atlantic that was not a given, however since the sky was always dark. Eduard had spent a week with nothing but rain and gray, dull, cloud overhead.
Eduard ate the last bit of shark jerky which had always tasted off. He had to try to fall asleep with the taste of jerked shark in his mouth which proved a more difficult task than he imagined. He wished for toothpaste and a toothbrush and understood why sharks ate people but it didn't work the other way around. He began to understand that just because one could eat another living thing without ill effect; it didn't mean one always should do so. It also explained that Iceland would not have a thriving shark export business.
Eduard woke up to find his Fiat life raft filling with water. He had seen Titanic in the theater as a kid and understood what his car had begun to do only without the help of the iceberg. He had left the window open so he could urinate out of it when the urge hit and he noticed he had arrived at some soret of large land mass covered in some kind of pine forest. If here were lucky, he would find himself dazed and confused in Norway or Scotland. If he were unlucky, he would find himself dazed and confused in Russia. He took a deep breath and jumped out the cold water stung when he struck it. He could never swim well on any account and all his muscles set like concrete and turned to knots that refused to obey his brain so he had to hope the current would carry him to shore. His car maid a vile hissing sound as the trunk sank below the surface.
"I'm totally screwed!" Eduard said in a pleasant European accented English. His father used French which his mother partly understood and his mother used Estonian which no one understood so Eduard ended up speaking English as a middling compromise.
Four men in a small metal patrol boat pulled up to him and tossed out a red life ring. Eduard didn't recognize the men as uniformed NATO troops or Norwegians and the flag fluttering in the gray sky was not Russian. It had a rather odd flame symbol on it and the soldiers wore a uniform of red and black. Eduard was cold and exhausted and in his state he assumed that oil rig workers had plucked him out of the North Sea. He passed out from exhaustion hoping that the workers worked for the huge Norwegian oil company Statoil since he had shares in that company
Azula stood over Eduard with her arms crossed. "I thought you'd be taking part in my father's meeting and I come here to find you packing." Azula tapped her fingers waiting for her answer.
Eduard folded a pair of red boxers. "I'll be coming with you and your brother to Ember Island."
"My father didn't request your presence at the meetings this weekend?"
"Fire Lord Ozai has never even spoken to me." Eduard said as he packed his clothing neatly into his knapsack. "He has no interest in listening to my practical difficulties as Minister of Production and doesn't trust me because I'm not Fire Nation. He can meet with his generals and when I return, I will find a stack of paper the height of you stacked on my desk asking for all kinds of outrageous things that the military thinks it needs."
Azula had suspected as much since her father regarded Eduard as a foreigner and doubted his true loyalties. At first, Azula had Eduard tossed into prison for a month and she kept him uninformed but comfortable and found his intellect sharp and his odd background compelling. "So you'll be coming with us to Ember Island?"
Karo folded a set of red pants neatly. He wore the uniform of a Fire Nation dignitary with a gold trimmed black vest. Azula had noted his neat and fussy nature which he reflected in his neat dress habits and flawless uniform. "The Fire Lord still regards me as an untrustworthy foreigner so I took this as a chance to leave the palace and look into buying a summer home so I can have an escape from this place."
"What makes you think I'll let you out of my sight?" Azula said.
Eduard thought for a moment, "and you want me around the palace all of the time?" Eduard knew he didn't have the same trust as Fire Nation nobles and so he knew Azula could raise her objections to his plans to buy a summer house. He had not forgotten he lived under a dictatorship run under the oppressive fists of the Fire Lord but he had grown accustomed to such things and knew how to live within the limitations of his freedoms. He had no choice and since he knew little of the nature of his fate, he chose to adapt rather than fight his confinement. "I have no doubt you have ways of keeping tabs on me so I don't fall out of line. You have more reason to fear your brother Zuko's loyalty than mine."
Azula considered Eduard of great practical value but a person endowed with annoying habits. He whistled complex tunes that never followed a pattern, spoke in a dirty sounding accent and had no fear of her. She had found him a year and a half ago as a half starving, very gaunt, short Eduard a troop of Fire Nation soldiers had plucked out of the ocean just off the coast of the Northern Earth Kingdom. At first the soldiers took him into custody and held him prisoner but Azula saw a use for the odd, short strawberry blonde young man. Her father had banished her brother and she needed someone loyal to work in the palace. Eduard fit her needs nicely since he knew nothing at all about this world and she could manipulate him to suite her needs. She needed such an ally: Zuko had been banished, Azula shared the Fire Lord's great ambitions and Eduard could be shaped to fit her needs despite his flaws. He still spoke the Fire Lord's Chinese with a nearly unforgivable accent, looked far to foreign to trust and spoke with a detached formality.
Eduard had no choice in this: he didn't speak the language at first but in prison he understood the Princess held all of the keys to his life. He adapted as he needed to and worked to learn the language and culture through the distorted prism of the Fire Nation's propaganda. He disliked the arrangement and never could figure out how he had stumbled into his misfortune but he did what he had to in order to survive. He had not yet figured out if he had died that day in the North Tlantic when his car sank and this was his version of purgatory or if he had survived and stumbled upon some kind of strange Lost World. He preferred the idea of a Lost World since he didn't want to credit two thousand years of Christian tradition with being correct about purgatory.
By the standards of a person who had ridden on high speed rail and taken fast ferries; the large pink seal like creatures – some kind of sea mammal – went at a pace between dead slow and stop. Eduard passed the time sitting alone, whistling and drawing with a pencil in his sketch book. Zuko sat next to Eduard and tried to engage him in conversation. Zuko didn't dislike Eduard and Eduard didn't have the animosity that Azula had to her brother but they had little in common. Zuko reminded Eduard of the grumpy old men in the coffee shops of his homeland that griped endlessly about the state of the world, aches and pains and other matters for the sake of making conversation. Zuko didn't dislike Eduard and envied the short man's ability to keep an upbeat attitude in the face of life.
Eduard saw Zuko sit next to him on a large bench. At first Zuko said nothing but then as Eduard began to blow eraser crumbs off the paper, he decided to open up. "I thought you of all people would understand that we're being brushed off."
Uh – huh?" Eduard said in his stand offish manner but stopped drawing to show he would pay attention. "What course of action do you suggest we take? Your father wants to meet with his senior generals to prepare a plan for the rumored invasion planned for The Day of Black Sun. I don't count as one of the important people because I'm not Fire Nation. Don't you think it's a bit ambitious for an upstart prince to have delusions of his importance? You have only recently fallen back into favor with your father and I never had that favor: I'm an accountant."
Zuko had expected this kind of answer as Eduard didn't understand the importance of status and honor as Prince Zuko did. "Didn't you ever hope to earn respect in the eyes of your father?"
Eduard pondered this for a moment. "My father was an elementary school teacher so he didn't make the kinds of demands on me that your father did." Eduard could see the pale blue green outline of Ember Island on the horizon and the shape of the large cone that formed the volcano at its center. "I had to learn the piano and get good grades in school. Music wasn't my thing so I guess he had to live with my grades which were passable."
Zuko could see one of those odd cartoons taking shape on Eduard's drawing pad. Zuko lacked Eduard's delicate sense of humor or his desire to poke fun at the serious issues in life but Eduard showed some technical merit combined with a sense of satire. "I don't know if you should draw the Fire Nation generals with such disrespect."
"I have an eraser – see?" Eduard held up the rubber tip of his pencil then erased his drawing. "Even if I have to obey the orders of these people and do my duty; it doesn't mean I have to fear them. You have a far more difficult position since you're the Prince of the Fire Nation."
Zuko knew Azula had to have some means of keeping her freethinker under control but doubted that she had seduced him. He suspected Eduard had some kind of medical condition as he had the look of someone who had frail health in childhood so perhaps Azula held control over him through his medication.
Eduard put his drawing pad on the seat next to him and hands behind his head. "You have the power and position so your actions get noticed. I survive by not having either: I hold a position most think is uninteresting and I have a middling amount of influence and power so there you go."
Eduard picked up his drawing pad and retrieved a pencil he had placed behind his ear and began sketching the island he saw growing in the distance. Zuko walked off to sulk with Mai and left Eduard to himself.
A half hour later the ferry landed at a dock in Ember Island. Azula walked up to Eduard as he put his drawing pad away in his knapsack and hefted it on his back. "Your father could have sprung for an inn. I had expected something a little less squalid and less like a hostel?"
"Won't you be joining us?" Azula walked along with Eduard down the gangway.
"I can spring for an inn," Eduard said decisively. "and I will. I have my own business anyhow. I have a visit to the Estate Agent's planned. I hope to purchase the old summer home of your family unless you object?"
"Knock yourself out." Azula raised her eyebrow. "How can you possibly afford a summer home on Ember Island? I know you'd never do anything rash like steal money from the treasury but I didn't think you earned enough to afford a house."
Eduard stood on the cobbled path that led up to the main road that circled the small village. "I have simple needs and I saved so I could one day afford one." Eduard bowed to Azula and Ty Lee who had followed them quietly. "I bid you all a farewell." Eduard turned and began walking up the path to the main road to make his appointment with the Estate Agent.
Azula glanced at Ty Lee who proved less than helpful in most decisions. She knew Eduard didn't steal but he did have a way of placing his own money in profitable places which was what made him so invaluable to her.
Eduard appeared on the beach a few hours later jingling a set of brass keys on his finger and hoisting a large metal post over his left shoulder. "Ty Lee has a large number of drones," Eduard stood between the beach towels of Azula and Zuko and Mai and watched three young teenage boys fussing over her and serving her every wish. "I bought your family summer house for a song." Eduard reached into his vest and produced the deed to the place and the beachfront property. "Not literally a song since music isn't my thing but at a substantial bargain. I love the smell of freshly inked deeds in the mid afternoon."
"You're rambling." Azula sounded a bit ticked off. "Ty Lee!"
Eduard grimaced at Azula's shrill voice.
"Do you know how to play Kuai Ball?" Zuko asked politely.
Eduard had no use for organized sports and stood almost a head shorter than any of his Fire Nation friends and feared for his life. "Does it look like it?" Eduard said to Zuko. "I would laugh out loud but I have better things to do with my afternoon and one of them involves an eviction."
"Eviction?" Mai asked as she stood up.
"Zoology doesn't count as one of my areas of expertise," Eduard confessed, "but upon inspecting the house I purchased, I discovered two large and hissing green lizards with yellow stripes on their backs. I don't think we can form a lasting relationship."
"You didn't dress for the beach." Zuko noticed Eduard stood out in his black vest and red clothes.
"I didn't come to hang out on the beach. I didn't come to kill lizards so we don't always pick our duties." Eduard rambled. Azula hated this trait of his. She had hoped she could shape him into a more suitable Fire Nation noble but he never quite grasped formality or the exact way his rambling made him appear socially inept. She realized that she could make him dress like a Fire Nation noble, she even had taught him some rudimentary fire bending moves but she couldn't make him think as someone from the Fire Nation.
"Ty Lee!" Azula yelled louder.
"How will you get rid of mongoose lizards?" Zuko asked.
Eduard gave that a thoughtful look. "Fire bending? Azula did teach me a few basic moves." Eduard gave another thoughtful look at Mai. "Given my lack of accuracy and the desire not to burn down my new house, perhaps I'll stab them with a metal pole."
Azula fumed at Ty Lee's lack of attention. "Eduard?" She asked the young man. "Can you tell Ty Lee we need her as a fourth for a Kuai Ball team?" She looked on with disgust as one of Ty Lee's drones began rubbing coconut oil over her back.
"Sure," Eduard sauntered off toward Ty Lee's staked out territory on the beach. "do you want me to whack one of those guys in the back of the head with this metal pole?"
"No!"
"In the event I should whack one of them in the head; would you object?"
"No!" Azula hated Eduard's calm sarcasm most of all since she couldn't match his ability to quietly state things in a cynical manner with no regard for the social impact. She had enough of Eduard and gently pushed him on the back and hoped that with his short attention span; he would remember the Kuai Ball game.
Eduard knew Ty Lee well enough and it proved to him that some things remained constant across realities. Ty Lee had great beauty, had great combat stealth, acrobatic skills (and what teenage boy wouldn't find a woman who could bend backward and touch her feet intriguing) as well as a saccharine personality the opposite of Eduard's. The young teenage boys all hoped to get lucky and score; Eduard knew they didn't stand a chance because that was how things worked in his own Universe.
"Hi, Eduard." Ty Lee said as he approached with the metal pole that had once had an estate's agent's name hung from it.
"I bought a house." The agreeable man said as he nearly speared the tall teenager fanning the circus woman. "Azula told me something she wanted you to know.
"Watch out with that thing." The young man protested.
"No," Eduard said quietly in that absent minded way that convinced Mai he was Ty Lee's cousin, "at least I don't recall coming here with a thing to watch."
"You nearly stabbed me with the metal pole!"
Eduard worked back in his mind. 'Lizards – No', he thought 'something about Kuai Ball?' "Oh, sorry!" Eduard stuck the pole in the sand. "Azula wants you to play the fourth in Kuai ball."
"Ty Lee! Get over here." Azula yelled.
Ty Lee did a quick flip and walked down the beach on her hands.
"Now you must admit that she's gorgeous." The tall boy who had applied the sunscreen almost whistled.
"Me?" Eduard pointed at himself, "I admit to nothing. If you three have stopped deluding yourselves about dating Ty Lee can I ask you if you know how to kill mongoose lizards?" Eduard picked up the metal signpost and swung it around his shoulder and nearly impaled the shorter man who had also aided in fanning Ty Lee. "I'll take your silence as a no then."
Eduard left the trio scratching their heads. Eduard looked about their age but his odd behavior and his obvious delusions that as young teenage boys with functional circulatory systems, they weren't the most appealing males in the world struck them as rude, standoffish and in a way it nudged one of their deeply held insecurities to the surface. They watched the small, odd man walk away whistling an odd tune with a syncopated rhythm and wondered 'what if I can't ever find a date and end up like him?'
Bang!
Crash!
Eduard tried to stealthily cross the attic with his sign post and utterly failed as a very expensive looking tea set with bright Fire Nation logos and gold trim resting on a box smashed to the floor of the attic and blew apart into a thousand fragments. 'Why did that idiot put a tea set on a pile of boxes where I could knock it down,' Eduard thought to himself. 'Anything that used logic', realized Eduard, 'could be outsmarted by something that could think as logically.' The lizards had a gift for strategy that Eduard had to admit, he lacked. He had hoped to sneak up on the lizards and dash their brains out with the metal pole and it had never occurred to Eduard who had grown up in a temporal climate and knew no reptiles by sight that evolution could have shaped lizards to think.
Eduard saw a shadow move and tried to land the sign post on it.
Azula grabbed the sign post as she climbed the wooden ladder into the attic. "If you want to succeed as a great fire bender," Azula spoke as if delivering a sermon, "you'll have to show much more brute strength than that."
Eduard quietly put down the metal sign post. "What about bashing random objects in the attic and hoping for the best? What makes you think anything in my comfortable life has ever prepared me for lizards?"
Azula sat on the edge of the attic hatch in the gloom and humid heat of the attic. "We have an invitation to a big party with all the teenagers on Ember Island or at least those who count."
"Teenage party?" Eduard leaned on a set of heavy boxes. "This a warning to me to go to minimum safe distance?"
Azula said nothing for a moment then as if ignoring Eduard's sarcastic comment explained further, "I intimidate men and asked for an invitation after the two guys hosting it had invited Ty Lee. I never do well at parties."
"I have..." Eduard turned his head because he thought he heard hissing, "never known you to fear anything." Eduard had never feared parties but he didn't much like them much because he didn't function as a social animal. If the host had a nice television and a capable cable box; Eduard spent his time watching movies or sports on television which often turned out to become a very popular activity among other guests. He knew Azula lacked that option but imagined a well made Pai Sho table could function in much the same way.
"What does one do for an entire evening with teenagers?" Azula asked' "Guys find me intimidating and I have nothing to talk with when I meet girls."
Eduard thought of something profound but a mongoose lizard hip ran out from a pile of wooden crates and gave him a forceful body check into a post supporting the roof hissing as it knocked Eduard off his feet.
Eduard crumpled for a second but Azula took no time in sending a focused blue fire bolt at the lizard and incinerated its back. The lizard made a pathetic hiss and then squealed helplessly as if caught in the murk of a tar pit. Azula sent a second fire bolt at the lizard and it collapsed in a smoldering heap of flesh. It continued breathing for a few moments and then expired.
Eduard coughed in the smoke and acrid smell of cooked reptile. "Where I came from..." he panted, "we would have given him a yellow card."
An hour later, Eduard sat in his kitchen wondering what to do with a dead, cooked lizard in his attic. Azula had solved one problem while creating a bigger problem which consisted of a hundred kilograms of congealed reptilian protein and that would quickly begin to turn bad in the heat of the attic. Eduard decided the brute force plan worked out best in his mind: find a long length of rope somewhere in the house and drag the purifying corpse of the reptile out to the steep drop off and roll him into the ocean.
Eduard hunted through the dim house with a lantern but after a long search found no rope. As the shadows of the trees grew longer, Eduard went out into the stone garden she and found an old length of rope. He tromped back to the house with a length of hemp rope ready to solve the next problem: How would he haul a hundred kilogram lizard down two flights of stairs and outside?
He figured gravity would kick in at some point.
The lizard Eduard had seen had a bulk of muscle behind its neck and Eduard winched as he threaded the rope around it to prevent the rope from slipping off. Bits of green baked lizard skin came off as he threaded the rope around the dead animal's neck and made a knot. Eduard began to drag the lizard which proved easier than he had thought since the lizard had cooked and a slick layer of grease formed under it.
"What in my comfortable existence ever prepared me for this?" Eduard uttered his motto as he let go of the rope and let the lizard fall through the attic hatch. It landed on the wooden floor with a greasy thump. Eduard followed behind it taking care not to slip on its supponofied fat. "Lizards and platypus bears – oh my!" Eduard dragged the lizard to the stairs and kicked it down to the first floor. Eduard worked out the shortest distance to the back door and dragged the lizard to the door, opened the latch that locked the door from the inside. He dragged the lizard through and then kicked it down the stairs; with a loud bang he closed the door and locked the bolt. He sat on the back door steps thinking about his next job. He gave up and decided to wash his hands in the kitchen sink and have some tea: the lizard wasn't likely to go anywhere.
The house had a front door, a back door and a large set of two heavy wooden double doors that lead out onto a stone paved courtyard about the size of a tennis court surrounded by a large wooden porch surrounding it. At least it didn't require mowing. Eduard had to wait until the gas utility had turned on the gas to have fuel for cooking and lighting. The sun had begun to set and he found himself wandering the house and sorting through old Royal Family belongings. He had noticed he smelled like a dead whale after handling the dead lizard and decided to take a shower and don his night robe.
The house had running water fed from a spring further up the side of the hill. Eduard opened the door to the bathroom and placed the lantern on the cabinet next to the sink. He let the shower run for several minutes to clear out the stale water and clean the shower. He went to his knapsack in the kitchen and brought out a large towel. He went back in the bathroom to the smell of boric acid and lithium from some hideous combination of minerals that came out in the warm spring water. He stepped into the pink marble tiled shower and could taste the foul metals in the water.
The shower allowed the small fire bender to relax. He had not become a master fire bender by any means but knew how to keep the shower water warm enough to make it tolerable. He had found as much freedom from his masters possible but as he showered, he knew Azula had no plans to grant him more. She saw value in his intelligence and isolation; while he had no knowledge of this world and relied on her to keep him alive and healthy. As a modern European, he had no idea what constituted food in this odd land, no idea what they used for medicine and he no knowledge of poisonous snakes, spiders or dangerous animals. Azula knew she had a use for him, something to trade and he had to comply or risk isolation as a helpless stranger.
Eduard found this bothered him less than he had imagined. He still harbored the colonial outlook of his homeland. The Fire Nation had become the leading industrial and economic power in the world and in Eduard's mind that meant they had a right to saunter around the world and stomp on the Earth Kingdom or other less advanced nations. Europe had abandoned this but Eduard understood the history behind it and like most Europeans; saw no reason to apologize to those nations they had abused. Indeed it had been a much needed push to advance the world. The Fire Nation in Eduard's eyes didn't look all that different that the great European powers. He often enjoyed thinking during showers and a so this shower took a half an hour until the minerals in the water began to wrinkle the skin in his hands and feet.
Eduard stepped out of the shower, donned a set of comfortable boxers and his fine red night robe with gold trip and decided to explore the house. He picked up the lantern and began to explore. The house needed work – hence the reason he got it at a bargain. He had to restore the water and gas, needed a new roof and a few walls needed repair. In spite of its abandonment, the basic structure remained very solid. He opened the door to a study. He disliked the red wallpaper and a large ivy had grown over the window and blocked out most of the light. Eduard had long wondered why the stately homes of the nobility had interiors better suited to coal mines. They loved dark interiors and did anything to suck up any light. Any light that managed to tunnel in, soon left to light up something with more taste.
Eduard peered onto a few boxes of books and examined the empty shelves and knew a clean up was in order and made a mental note to hire some local help. He walked into the large kitchen which had a double sink, a gas range and oven as well as more cupboard room than he would find useful. Ember Island had a town gas plant – they heated coal to drive off the flammable fumes and piped it into houses to provide light and heat for cooking. Eduard made a note to have the gas service restored as he found stumbling in a dark house with a lantern quite unnerving. On the whole, he felt proud he had purchased a nice house at such a good price and that most of the work could be done over a period of a few months. He placed the old chain and lock around the front door. He knew Ember Island had little crime but he viewed it prudent to not to take chances and placed the chain with its lock around the doors so he's remember to lock the front door.
He returned to the study where he had found the crates of books and found a dusty old couch that had withstood the years quite well. It had a solid dark oak frame and soft velvet upholstery and reminded Eduard of the kind of couches used in therapists offices. He went to the window and found the crank to open it worked but the strong vines of the heavy ivy kept the window from opening but a crack. He lay back on the couch and relaxed as he went through a list of the things that needed doing to turn this old house into a home.
Eduard let himself drift into a relaxed state – for him the closest he got to meditation. He woke up to a loud banging. Some time had past and it had grown dark outside. In the few seconds it took him to rouse his senses and grab the lantern; the front door smashed in and landed against the far wall of the porch with a thud. Eduard blew out the lantern and let his eyes adapt to the dark. Azula had schooled him in the arts of fire bending and he slowly opened the door without making a sound.
"Prince Zuko?" He muttered as he saw a figure in the dark hallway. The figure lingered at a stand in the hallway for a few moments and then Eduard heard the voice of Azula calling out from outside. The prince turned away from the stand and walked out. Eduard watched the two figures in the dim light of the evening. They left and Eduard approached the stand which had a plaster cast of a child's hand. Eduard shrugged and wondered why Zuko had taken to breaking into the house to steal from him.
Eduard had another item on his list – repair a front door. He reminded himself to speak with Zuko about this matter because he could think of better things to do in the mid morning paradise of Ember Island than fix a door. Eduard had not locked the chain and saw no reason for the hot headed Prince Zuko to bash in his front door.
Eduard struggled with the heavy front door. Azula, Mai and Ty Lee came walking up the gravel road that lead to the house from the beach and watched in amusement as Eduard dragged the door into place just to have the heave door drop with a dull thud and slide down the stairs. The physical comedy of it made Ty Lee laugh out loud.
Eduard looked up at the three girls. "Hello?" He stood up and bowed in his polite way. "As I see it, Zuko should have come with you on this visit." Eduard looked at the door and then to the three girls. "I had some very loud yelling planned for him as he broke down the door to my house late last night. I enjoy yelling as it cleanses my soul."
"He's been at the wrong end of your temper so he decided to sleep in." Azula said. Eduard had a temper that Azula had seen detonate. He disliked Prince Zuko and considered him a colossal grumbler and they didn't get along. Azula could use this and decided it served her interests to keep the hostility going.
"Uncaring ass!" Eduard snapped. "I don't know how to fix a door and I had hoped he would turn up before we left this evening to help me repair it." Eduard ripped a leaf off a low growing palm on the side of the large stairs that led to the front door. "I need a door," He crumpled the leaves and tossed it to the side, "at least the people who are experts in houses recommend one. If I don't get this fixed then when I come next weekend I'm likely to half the wildlife of the island and some hobos living in my basement!"
That Monday found Zuko pacing outside of Eduard's office door. Zuko hadn't yet had enough time to come to know the young man who had become Minister of Production but his reputation preceded him when Mai cautioned the young prince to fear Eduard's temper. Zuko knocked on the office door.
"Please enter," Eduard said loudly but politely.
Zuko opened the door with a quiet click and walked into the room. "Good morning Eduard."
"My door?" Eduard sat at his desk as he worked through the piles of papers on his desk. "Would you kick down the door of my office?" Eduard held a piece of paper in one hand and a stamp with red ink in the other. "As a matter of policy do you kick in a closed door like a footballer trying for a goal? I thought I'd ask because I'd hate to think a Prince of the Realm had trouble controlling his temper."
"I'm sorry." Zuko apologized, "I have not felt myself in recent weeks since I returned from my banishment."
Eduard stamped the paper and wrote a few characters on a piece of paper with a quill pen. "I had to have my door fixed so I trust you will see fit to pay the costs." Eduard handed Zuko a receipt on a yellow piece of paper.
"You didn't tell my father?"
"You want me to? Do you think he needs to know?" Eduard asked, "more to the point, would he care?"
"I mean...nevermind." Zuko blushed.
"I'm not on a first name basis with the Fire Lord." Edurad said frankly, "so pay for the door and we'll call it even."
Zuko bowed and began to leave.
"The Day of Black Sun." Eduard said enigmatically. "The day we expect the enemies of the Fire Nation to attack the city."
Zuko stopped and turned around. "How do you know?"
"Every time your father plans a military operation, it brings our nation that much closer to the financial brink. I receive many requisitions for many very expensive and unnecessary things because the warlords that run this country plan operations and make demands with no idea of the practical difficulties." Eduard fanned a yellow folder of paperwork. "We built The Drill at huge cost and it sits at the edge of Ba Sing Se to this day. After the conquest of Ba Sing Se, Princess Azula ordered the Dai Lee to bury it at the bottom of a very deep pit to preserve its secrets."
"What secrets?" Zuko asked.
Eduard shrugged. "I have no idea. I wanted the materials recycled because The Drill cost so much and took so long to build but no one listened to me – so there you go. Princess Azula had it buried in a pit rather than dismantle it."
Zuko paced Eduard's office. "Why tell me this?" The Prince spoke quietly as if he feared being overheard.
"I have my misgivings about the course Fire Lord Ozai has set before us." Eduard mused, "Pride goes before a fall and the waste and excess of the War worries me greatly. We can repel the invaders on the Day of Black Sun as the rebels are nowhere near strong enough to defeat us."
"Isn't that good?"
"I fear not." Eduard said earnestly. "Fire Lord Ozai and Princess Azula have no idea of the scale of the Earth Kingdom – it's not a kingdom, it's a continent. It spans thirteen time zones and has an area of fifty million square kilometers or more. By my numbers, that makes the Earth Kingdom two hundred times larger than the Fire Nation in area. We conquered Omashu and Ba Sing Se and that leaves us forty nine million eight hundred thousand more square miles to hold."
"Why tell me?" Zuko said sadly as if acknowledging the truth of Eduard's words.
Eduard folded his hands neatly on the desk. "The Fire Nation in the Earth Kingdom is like a huge saber toothed moose lion in a field of ants. The moose lion will kill thousands or million but in the end the ants will eat the moose lion to the bone. I no longer sleep well and I can't find happiness. I feel ill and tired. If you have a moral conscience, I hope you will help us out of this trap."
Zuko said nothing for a few moments. "Why do you keep working for the Fire Lord? Why keep doing your paperwork and duties."
"My will to live still remains?" Eduard said enigmatically, "I have a heart defect and without medication I could die. Your sister knows this and she controls the supply of my medication and if I defy her; she'll cut me off and I'll die a painful death. She uses this to keep me in line." Eduard opened up his hands, "so there you go."
Eduard went on a walk late that afternoon and wandered through the Fire Nation Palace gardens and stopped to examine the flowers. Azula knew Eduard had a schedule and stuck to it as a stubborn routine and decided to meet up with him as he turned past the crimson colored bush of rhododendrons that seemed to so captivate him.
"I had not expected this from you." Azula said as Eduard held a rhododendron blossom in his hand. "I hear that you have grave concerns about our fortunes in the War."
Eduard might have found this surprising but he didn't show any signs of surprise. He half expected Azula to have spooks listening in on him. He gently let go of the blossom. "I thought the walls might have ears. If I have to censor every word I say, I'll never say anything remotely useful."
Azula looked at him impatiently. "The Fire Nation will lose the War? Remotely useful?"
"Why did you have The Drill buried?" Eduard said as he faced Azula. "We spent a huge sum building that machine – more than all the naval ships we built in ten years – and you made no attempt to recover the thing? It lies buried at the bottom of a pit at the western walls of Ba Sing Se. We have begun to run out of steel, oil and coal to carry our war efforts forward."
"The Drill held vital state secrets," Azula replied, "and we could not let its secrets fall into the wrong hands."
Eduard didn't believe a word of this lie. "That thing lay outside of the walls of Ba Sing Se for almost two months before the city fell. I have no doubt the Earth Kingdom had a chance to crawl all over the thing and examine its secrets." Eduard put his hands behind his back as he faced Azula. "I can see only two reasons to bury the thing in a deep pit. The Fire Nation has secrets to hide from the world and something about the manner in which you built that thing made it impossible to recover."
Azula glared at Eduard. "You're on the edge of becoming insubordinate." She put her hand on his back and patted him. "The Drill holds a dark secret but the Avatar bears the reason for it's final destruction." Her voice dripped with contempt.
Eduard took this as typical Fire Nation paranoia as he had seen the plans for The Drill and nothing except its scale offered anything new. As a terror weapon, it failed and turned into the largest heap of scrap metal anyone had ever tried to power with a steam engine. He decided to remain silent about this.
Azula motioned to Eduard to follow her. "I remind you that you speak far too freely. I don't like to think you have become a freethinker."
Eduard spent his first weekend at the new house. The contractors had repaired the door and begun working on the roof. He smelled no funk and hoped the gardener's he'd hired to straighten things up had done away with the dead lizard. He found the crates he had sent over the previous day neatly stacked on the front porch with a crowbar place on top of the largest one by the movers. Eduard retrieved his mail and as he passed through the front door cast a glance around the house to check for anyone lurking in the bushes. He made his way to the kitchen and found the gas and water service had been restored as promised. He placed his bags on the table and pulled out a can of tea and with a small flick of his fingers, turned the knob of the stove and lit the flame. He turned it off and decided to open the crates on the front porch and begin unpacking.
The house still had little natural light and Eduard had to admit he awaited the time when he had the interior repainted. He sorted his dishes and tea supplies into the cupboards. He had a delicate tea set with roses on a white glaze and he placed the tea pot on the old stove and lit the burner.
He heard a knock at the door. The knock had the kind of urgency and authority and Eduard expected to see Azula on his front porch.
"I had not expected to see you," Eduard said politely and bowed.
Azula held up a sign Eduard had in one of his crates. "Golgatha – The Place of the Skull?"
"Là est votre salut." Eduard laughed quietly.
Azula had come to understand some of Eduard's strange language and returned with a translation. "Happiness waits for you there." She waited for a look of surprise and found a hint of one just barely slinking across Eduard's face. "May I come in?"
"By all means," Eduard motioned to invite Azula into the house. "I've made tea."
Azula followed Eduard to the dim dining room. She smiled slightly but Eduard never noticed. "I came to see you because I have a serious issue to discuss with you."
"I see." Eduard said quietly as he held the tea strainer and filled it with tea.
Eduard had no dining room table so Azula leaned against the near wall and looked at her fingernails. "My father has decided to have Prince Zuko executed."
Eduard had a look of fear not surprise on his face.
"If you let news of this leak beyond this room; I will have you killed as well." Azula growled. "After The Day of Black Sun, we will have my brother arrested and tried for treason, then he will die. We know the Avatar lives. Zuko knew this but told no one so he will die for his treason."
Eduard held the tea pot but his hand visibly shook. "Why tell me?" He had reason to fear for his own life as he waited with his hands shaking.
"You have become a liability," Azula crossed her arms. "I have reason to believe you would side with my brother and so I've decided to have you executed on the same day. Unlike Zuko, I have decided to have you tossed in prison now so you can suffer."
Eduard nodded.
Azula had hoped to have the thrill of running Eduard down and snaring him as he tried to flee in fear but Eduard showed no emotion as he turned the stove off. Azula cautiously approached Eduard but thought to herself 'I have nothing to fear from this small man'. She watched him carefully as she walked toward him anticipating a fire bending attack but he did nothing. She put her hand on his back and he obediently walked down the hall.
Eduard relied on good old fashioned guile. He knew Azula expected a fire bending attack but he hip checked her against a solid wall and then elbowed her in the nose. Eduard knew she could beat him with fire bending but not with hockey violence. Eduard had officiated hockey since in his world, his heart problem was not a health threat and knew all the best ways to earn a penalty.
Azula crumpled and caught her nose. "Guys!" She stood up with blood dripping down her nose and ran after Eduard. "Get him!"
Eduard leaped down the stone steps of the front porch. He knew he couldn't escape and expected Azula to cut him down or her guards would trap him in a net. He refused to make arresting him an easy affair. He heard knives whistling through the air. He had heard pucks make much the same sound and he moved with agility to avoid them. The knives flew into the bushes having missed their target. 'It would be rude to interfere with play.' He thought to himself as he felt a sting in his right side as he hit the bottom of the porch steps. He felt his body hit the ground and he could not get up.
Ty Lee stood over him as he fell to the stone path with a tear in her eye – Eduard had not expected this. Mai had a deeply sad look on her face as she stood over Eduard but said nothing.
Eduard tried to warn Mai of the plans for Zuko but he found he could not speak.
Azula stood over him as blood dripped out of her nose accompanied by two Fire Nation guards. "Get him out of my sight." She kicked him hard in the side of the head and his vision faded.