Disclaimer: I no, I no, I don't own LOTR or any of the characters, though I
don't think that's a bad thing, could anyone stand being around with
someone who seems to have absolutely no personal hygiene, i'm talking bout
Aragorn, does that man ever wash, I don't have anything else against him.
Anyway I don't own anything Tolkein related.
This is my first fanfic so sorry if it's a bit slow to get started, it's basically coming of the top of my head.
Chapter one: The morning after
The council of Elrond, before the council. The night everyone celebrates Frodo's recovery, well the morning after, and fuzzy memorys.
Gandalf woke up, his body was in a half empty fountain and his arm was slung around Sam, who was sitting in what appeared to be the rest of the water that should have been in the fountain. At least Gandalf hoped it was water from the fountain.
He couldn't remember why he was in a fountain or even how he had got there, and he wasn't quite sure why he was using a hairy bolder as a foot rest. It took the wizard by surprise when the bolder moved.
He jumped to his feet, his hand searching for his staff.. "Stay back evil creature, dark magic shall not avail you!" He couldn't find his staff.
"ourch, you call me an evil creature, try waking up with those feet next to your nose, that is good old fashioned torture" The bolder spoke.
Gandalf still couldn't find his staff. "I'll have you know that while being kept captive by Saruman the White and forced to cook for his orks every day then foot hygiene becomes the least of your worries". The staff still didn't appear.
"if your looking for that staff of yours you won't have much luck, I vaguely remember two wee hobbits running off with it while you were telling Aragorn how much you hated him and then telling Lord Elrond how you were gonna sleep with his daughter, you were really pissed last night. The names Gimli by the way"
The hangover hit the wizard. He staggered a bit, he managed to regain control of body. "I, I told Elrond I was gonna sleep with Arwen, he doesn't even like the thought of Aragorn sleeping with her, and he's not old enough to be her great, great,great, well garandfather. Wait, two hobbits ran off with my staff, what did they look like.
Gimli yawned and stretched. "you know, small, a bit chubby, a bit like a dwarf with no hair, but better looking, one of them had a weird accent."
"Merry and that fool of a took, I might have known." He began to climb out of the fountain ignoring the dwarf who seemed to be hangover free. He would have managed it without a hangover but that wasn't the case. He tripped over his soggy robes and landed next to the sleeping hobbit who chose that exact moment to roll over and land on the wizard, but instead of waking up he just began to snore.
Gimli just laughed and climbed out of the fountain, instead of helping he just wandered off.
"Stupid dwatf. I knew this hobbit needed to go on a diet" Gandalf muttered.
I know it's short but I'll write more soon, I'll try to make it funnier. Reviews would be greatly appreciated, and if anyone wants to suggest ideas, I plan to put something about Frodo and Legolas diying their nose hair but im low on ideas.
This is my first fanfic so sorry if it's a bit slow to get started, it's basically coming of the top of my head.
Chapter one: The morning after
The council of Elrond, before the council. The night everyone celebrates Frodo's recovery, well the morning after, and fuzzy memorys.
Gandalf woke up, his body was in a half empty fountain and his arm was slung around Sam, who was sitting in what appeared to be the rest of the water that should have been in the fountain. At least Gandalf hoped it was water from the fountain.
He couldn't remember why he was in a fountain or even how he had got there, and he wasn't quite sure why he was using a hairy bolder as a foot rest. It took the wizard by surprise when the bolder moved.
He jumped to his feet, his hand searching for his staff.. "Stay back evil creature, dark magic shall not avail you!" He couldn't find his staff.
"ourch, you call me an evil creature, try waking up with those feet next to your nose, that is good old fashioned torture" The bolder spoke.
Gandalf still couldn't find his staff. "I'll have you know that while being kept captive by Saruman the White and forced to cook for his orks every day then foot hygiene becomes the least of your worries". The staff still didn't appear.
"if your looking for that staff of yours you won't have much luck, I vaguely remember two wee hobbits running off with it while you were telling Aragorn how much you hated him and then telling Lord Elrond how you were gonna sleep with his daughter, you were really pissed last night. The names Gimli by the way"
The hangover hit the wizard. He staggered a bit, he managed to regain control of body. "I, I told Elrond I was gonna sleep with Arwen, he doesn't even like the thought of Aragorn sleeping with her, and he's not old enough to be her great, great,great, well garandfather. Wait, two hobbits ran off with my staff, what did they look like.
Gimli yawned and stretched. "you know, small, a bit chubby, a bit like a dwarf with no hair, but better looking, one of them had a weird accent."
"Merry and that fool of a took, I might have known." He began to climb out of the fountain ignoring the dwarf who seemed to be hangover free. He would have managed it without a hangover but that wasn't the case. He tripped over his soggy robes and landed next to the sleeping hobbit who chose that exact moment to roll over and land on the wizard, but instead of waking up he just began to snore.
Gimli just laughed and climbed out of the fountain, instead of helping he just wandered off.
"Stupid dwatf. I knew this hobbit needed to go on a diet" Gandalf muttered.
I know it's short but I'll write more soon, I'll try to make it funnier. Reviews would be greatly appreciated, and if anyone wants to suggest ideas, I plan to put something about Frodo and Legolas diying their nose hair but im low on ideas.