Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Blizzard's other than the Battle Chest I own at home. If you try to sue me, all you will receive is the debts and bills I owe.
Author's note; "Dialogue"
/Thoughts to oneself/
Mindlink (if necessary
The Greatest Theft Ever
In the midst of the Blood Moor, a Necromancer was out exploring with his cousin and two of their friends; a sneakthief powerful and cunning enough to swipe the soulstone right out of the Dark Wanderer's head should he have wandered by. Besides the necromancer and his Rogue cousin, there was a Druid.
"Suro, I know this a very pretty spot, and that you're trying to sneak Cyra out from under my nose with the romantic setting; I can't help wondering it's really because you hid your stash around here."
"Guilty as charged, Xeo, on all counts. You can't blame me; she's the prettiest rogue in the camp."
"True," chimed in Rohaas, the druid, "but you don't see me trying to risk twenty arrowheads in the most uncomfortable places."
"I'd merely steal her quiver before I started to talk to her."
"So that's why my bow-strings have been dissappearing every time we come within a mile of a body of water."
"I can't help having a natural vice for once; I like to fish."
"You don't have to steal the rod just to go fishing every time you want to fish."
"Merely keeping in practice. We wouldn't want me to suddenly lose all capabilities because I haven't exercised the old talents in months?"
"Yes, we would."
"Rohass, what do you think? Rohaas? Now where'd he go?"
Rohaas had wandered over to the end of the camp; he had been sensing a large anomaly of demoic corruption nearby. That only meant one of two things; either there was a very powerful demon nearby, or there was a large gathering of lesser demons nearby. Either one was not preferable.
As Rohaas was deep in his thoughts, he stumbled upon a small chest, which looked like it was full to bursting.
/Hmm, free goodies…. I wonder if this is that old sneak's stash? He was always ultra-paranoid about people stealing from it./
As the druid went to open it, he noticed a person in dark robes standing by the chest. He had the look of a warrior; one who had seen tragedy beyond description.
"Who are you, and what are you? Answer quickly, demon. My better judgment and regards for the people of this land may overcome my curiousity at any second."
"That would be most unfortunate, Hero. You would regret it for all eternity."
"I'm certain..."
"Well, are we going to stand here all year bantering with the forces of Evil, or are we going to kick some demonic ass?"
"Wha…? Where did you come from, Suro?"
"I heard the shouting, and I noticed it was near my stash. I thought I would go see who was nice enough to alert me he was about to rob me."
"ahh, a thief. I haven't seen one of your kind in many years, almost a century, mortal."
"And I'm sure it was for the better all-around."
"Enough bantering, what do you want? Be quick, or the earth shall claim another of your foul brood."
"Very well, some fool of an agel named Tyreal thought he could steal back the Soulstones and uncorrupt them. He succeded with the first part; he obviously did not with the second."
"Ahh… then they are hidden in my stash. I wondered who had placed holy seals on it. I can't make them."
"If you do not release them to me, you and your pitiful plane will be crushed by my hand."
Suro began to shake in mock fear.
"Yes, oh mighty and terrible demon lord. Might we know whom we have the pleasure of betraying mankind to?"
"I am Diablo, mortal foo. Cower in terror before me!"
"Right. And I'm the Matriarch of the Amazon Isles."
At this point, the demon lord had obviously lost his patience; he began to concentrate a large quantity of mana into his hands for his trademark "L.B.O.D." (Lightning Blast Of Doom). Rohaas immediately sensed the mana and conjured a powerful wind, forcing it to coalesce around his boddy. He then began to glow, then was surrounded by a glowing mass of fire, right as the L.B.O.D. hit. When the smoke cleared, a gigantic mass of fur and muscles was standing there; a massive man-shape that resembled a bear. It growled meacingly, then charged in, extending its claws for a massive mauling strike.
"Pitiful druid, your skills are no match for mine! Surrender the Soulstones, or your little friends are dead!"
In response, Rohaas merely pressed his attack further, merely shrugging off Diablo's massive attacks.
Unfortunately, the attacks of the Prime Evil were leaving its toll; as the umpteenth wound was opened on Rohaas' tough Werebear hide, Rohaas tripped backwards, landing hard on his side.
As Diablo cackled and launched a massive hellfire barrage at Rohaas for the finishing strike, a massive form of flames ran up and began to hammer its clawed hands into Diablo's flanks, completely absorbing the damage.
"Are you all right, you miserable excuse for a throw rug?"
Rohaas merely grunted and shifted back to his human form. Then he began to call the winds to him, strengthening them into a massive gale; the cold was piercing.
"I like the light show, but now we end this!" shouted the thief, completely forgotten in the struggle of the hapless druid and the arrival of Xeo the necromancer to the rescue.
"Arrgghhh…. Annoying insects!"
"Yeah, and your mother was a saint!"
This insult made Diablo roar with anger, and he sent the largest nova of flames any of them had ever seen.
"Nice fireworks, but can you actually fight normally?" asked the sneakthief as he plunged a heavily poisoned dagger into where the heart of the warrior that harbored the Lord of Terror's spirit.
With a heart-rending scream, the Hell lord fell down, as the spirit relenquished its hold, dissapearring into the air and dissolving. Meanwhile, the last words of the warrior could be heard;
"Thank you, heroes. May you never face such a fate…."
And with those words, the threat of the Dark Wanderer was ended.
A/N: So, how was it? I know, it seems kinda random. I just happened to think of it; it was kinda a release for a dream I had.