Cullen AIM!

Bella- StupidxLamb

Edward- MasochisticVlion

Emmett- toughteddybear

Rosalie- Hottiewithabody

Alice- Shortstopxshopper

Jasper- Doyoufeelit

Jacob- Wolfyduhduhduh

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Chapter 1:

Jacob, Emmett, Shoes, and Gangsters

StupidxLamb has signed on.

MasochisticVlion has signed on.

MasochisticVlion: Hey sweetheart!

StupidxLamb: Hey babe! What are you doing?

MasochisticVlion: Just thinking about you.

StupidxLamb: Aww. Me too! I love you!

MasochisticVlion: I love you, too!

Wolfyduhduhduh has signed on.

MasochisticVlion: sorry, mutt, but you are interrupting me and my girlfriend's conversation.

Wolfyduhduhduh: wow, sorry, leech. It's too bad I don't care.

StupidxLamb: Jake! just get outta here! You know what you did to me!

MasochisticVlion: Bella?! What did he do to you?!?!

StupidxLamb: He told me he'd rather me be dead than a vampire! than he threw my head against the wall!

MasochisticVlion: OH MY GOD!! DID YOU HURT HER, YOU DOG?! CAUSE IF YOU DID I SWEAR TO GOD I'LL FREAKING TEAR YOUR FURRY LEGS OFF!!!!!

Wolfyduhduhduh: I didn't hurt her! She was being bitchy to me!!

StupidxLamb: NO I WASN'T! I told you that I didn't love you the way I love Edward, and that I just wanted to be friends. Then, I told you Edward was gonna turn me into a vampire soon and you got all upset. I was just being truthful!

Wolfyduhduhduh: Whatever, bitch.

MasochisticVlion: DON'T CALL MY GIRLFRIEND THAT! SHUT THE HELL UP, YOU GOOD-FOR-NOTHING DOG!

Wolfyduhduhduh: Why don't you come over here and make me!

MasochisticVlion: you don't know who you're messing with!!!!

Wolfyduhduhduh has signed off.

MasochisticVlion: Thank god he left! Bella, did he hurt you?! Why didn't you tell me earlier?!?!?!

StupidxLamb: I'm sorry!!!!! I was just so stressed!

MasochisticVlion: Bella, you NEED to tell me when you're hurt!!!!!!

Stupidxlamb: I'm sorry!!!! *starts crying*

MasochisticVlion: Oh, Bella! Please don't cry, baby! I'm sorry I yelled!! It's just I love you so much and I want to know when you've been harmed.

toughteddybear has signed on.

toughteddybear: Why, hello, handsome children I call my family!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

StupidxLamb: Hey Emmett!

MasochisticVlion: Hey, Em, what are you doing?

toughteddybear: I'M EATING A LOTTTTT OF SUGAR!!!! ESME STOLE MY UNDERWEAR! I HAVE HAIR!!!! AAAAAAAHH!

StupidxLamb: Emmett, stop eating sugar! you're a vampie! your not supposed to eat!

toughteddybear: I BELIEVE I CAN FLY! I BELIEVE I CAN TOUCH THE SKY! ICE ICE BABY! IF I WERE A BOY!

MasochisticVlion: EMMETT! LOOK, IT'S TINKERBELL!

toughteddybear: WHERE!?!?!

MasochisticVlion: In your closet!

toughteddybear: *screams like a girl* *looks in closet* TINKY! TINKY! IT'S BEEN SO LONG!!!!!

StupidxLamb: poor guy's lost it...

toughteddybear: NOOO! TINKY FLEW AWAY!!! I'M GONNA HURT HER!!!! I FEEL SO UNTOUCHED!!!!!!!

MasochisticVlion: Then call Rosalie if you wanna be touched!!!!

toughteddybear: She's hunting!!! I'M ALL ALONE! THERE'S NO ONE HERE BESIDE ME!!! I'M ALL ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

StupidxLamb: thank you, emmett, for that wonderful song!

toughteddybear: I. Love. SHOES! SHOES! SHOES! OH MY GOD! SHOES!

StupidxLamb: LET'S GET SOME SHOES! LET'S GET SOME SHOES!

MasochisticVlion: THESE SHOES RULE! THESE SHOES SUCK! THESE SHOES RULE! THESE SHOES SUCK!

toughteddybear: These shoes are 300 dollars. these shoes are 300 dollars. these shoes are 300 f****ing dollars!

ALL: LET'S GET 'EM!

StupidxLamb: k, that's enough.

toughteddybear: DA NA NA NA NA! BATMAN!!!!

MasochisticVlion: Batman's gangster!

toughteddybear: YES! LET'S PRETEND WE'RE GANGSTERS!

StupidxLamb: That's sound a-ight, man!

MasochisticVlion: Yo, who's all up in da crib tonight?

toughteddy: yo, yo, yo! A-ight, check dis out! I'ma eat mo suga!

StupidxLamb: Na na na, man! You caint do dat! You all gon' be hypa and stuff.

toughteddy: Well, aint dat da point, dawg?

MasochisticVlion: Yo, Em! Listen to ma babe, yo' caint eat no suga no more.

toughteddybear: Fine! I'ma bounce! I'll holla at ya'll lata!

toughteddybear has signed off.

StupidxLamb has signed off.

MasochisticVlion has signed off.

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Shortstopxshopper has signed on.

StupidxLamb has signed on.

Shortstopxshopper: Bella! Wanna go shopping with me tomorrow?!

StupidxLamb: NO! PLEASE, DON'T MAKE ME GO!

Shortstopxshopper: Why not, its just for a couple hours! please?!?! *pouts*

StupidxLamb: Alice! you know I cant handle pouting!

MasochisticVlion has signed on.

Doyoufeelit has signed on.

StupidxLamb: EDWARD!

MasochisticVlion: Hello, love. Hey Jasper and Alice.

Doyoufeelit: Hey peeps. What were you girls talking about?

Shortstopxshopper: BELLA WON'T COME SHOPPING WITH ME!

MasochisticVlion: Alice, you can't make Bella go shopping with you.

Shortstopxshopper: WHY NOT?!

Doyoufeelit: Honey, if bella doesn't wanna go than she doesn't have to.

StupidxLamb: Yes, thank you Jasper.

MasochisticVlion: HEY! I HELPED!

StupidxLamb: okay! thank you Edward! I love you!

MasochisticVlion: I love you too!

Shortstopxshopper: aww! you guys are soooo cute!

toughteddybear has signed on.

toughteddybear: CHOCOLATE! AAAAHH!!

Doyoufeelit: EMMETT! stop eating chocolate!

toughteddybear: I can't!!! IT'S MAGICALLY DELICIOUS!

MasochisticVlion: That's lucky charms!

toughteddybear: I can dream!

StupidxLamb: actually, no, you can't! where's rose?

toughteddybear: right next to me. STEALING MY CHOCOLATE! DIE! DIE!!!!! MURDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Doyoufeelit: Poor guy...

Shortstopxshopper: EMMETT! stop acting like a child!

toughteddybear: WHAT?!?! just cause I wanna see the hannah montana movie makes me a child?!?!?!

MasochisticVlion: HAHHAHA!!! EMMETT'S GOT A CRUSH ON HANNY MONTANY!

toughteddybear: no I don't!!!!! I just wanna see the movie!!!!! I like the song 'the climb' ALWAYS GONNA BE ANOTHER MOUNTAIN!!!!!!! I SEE YOUR DIRTY FACE HIDE BEHIND YOUR COLLAR!!!!!!! CHOCOLATE!! WHAT? WHAT DID HE SAY!?!?

StupidxLamb: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!

toughteddybear: STOP PRESSURING ME!!!!!!!!! I CAN'T BREATHE!!!!!!! CANT....BREATHE!!!!!!!

MasochisticVlion: you're a vampire!!!! you don't have to breathe!!!!!!!

toughteddybear: NOO!!!!!!! ROSE THREW WATER AT ME!!! IT'S SEEPING THROUGH MY SKIN!!!! HANNAH!!! SAVE ME!!!!!

Doyoufeelit: EMMETT!! Do you want us to lock you in the closet again?!?!

toughteddybear: NO!!!!!!! IT'S DARK AND SCARY!!!! KINDA LIKE A WART!!!!!!

Shortstopxshopper: THAN SHUT UP!!!!

StupidxLamb: Wait, what happened in a closet.

MasochisticVlion: One day, Emmett wouldn't shut up, so we locked him in his closet for a whole 3 minutes.

toughteddybear: I WAS SO SCARED!!!!! I WANTED DARTH VADER TO SAVE ME WITH MY NIGHT SABER NIGHT LIGHT!!

Doyoufeelit: Emmett, you don't have a light saber night light!

toughteddybear: THAN I'M BUYING ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shortstopxshopper: whatever you want, emmett. *rolls eyes*

toughteddybear: HEY! NO ONE ROLLS THEIR EYES AT ME! EXCEPT ROSE! AND ESME! AND CARLSILE! AND EDWARD! AND BELLA! AND JASPER! BUT NO, NOT ALICE!

StupidxLamb: Edward, your brother's scaring me.

MasochisticVlion: it's okay, baby, I'll protect you. *puts arm around Bella*

StupidxLamb: Thanks, Edward. I love you!

MasochisticVlion: I love you, too!

toughteddybear: YOU 2 SOUND LIKE AN OLD MARRIED COUPLE! OOH! SPEAKING OF MARRIED COUPLES, I HAVE TO GO FEED THE SQUIRREL!

Doyoufeelit: WE DON'T HAVE A SQUIRREL!

toughteddybear: THAN I'M BUYING ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shortstopxshopper: someone control the toddler!

toughteddybear: I AM NOT A TODDLER! JUST BECAUSE I LIKE HANNAH MONTANA, AM SCARED OF THE DARK, AND WANT A NIGHT SABER NIGHT LIGHT DOES NOT MAKE ME A TODDLER!!!!

MasochisticVlion: you also love tinker bell.

toughteddybear: NOT ANYMORE! TINKY FLEW AWAY, NOW I UPSET!!!!!!!!!

StupidxLamb: Emmett, you need to gh4i8.i9

Doyoufeelit: What does that mean?!

StupidxLamb: sorry, I fell off my chair, and my hands just flew over the keys! AND NOW MY HAND HURTS!

MasochisticVlion: Oh, Bella, sweetheart!! are you alright?!

StupidxLamb: Yeah, I'm good.

toughteddybear: god, Eddie-monkey. why are you so protective?!

MasochisticVlion: because I love Bella and I don't want her to get hurt.

Doyoufeelit: HAHAHAH!!!! EDDIE-MONKEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

toughteddybear: I got a name for you too, Jazzy-Panda!!!!

Shortstopxshopper: *holds back laughter* I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

StupidxLamb: JAZZY-PANDA!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

toughteddybear: te-he, I made you giggle. : )

MasochisticVlion: I like that word. giggle.

Doyoufeelit: do ya, EDDIE-MONKEY?!?! HAHAHAHA

toughteddybear: AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THERE'S A WORM IN THE SOFA!!!!!! GET IT OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HATE WORMS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shortstopxshopper: emmett, just squish it and it'll die!!

toughteddybear: NO! THEN IT'S POOPY WILL GET ALL ON ME!!!!!

MasochisticVlion: Emmett, you are such a child.

Hottiewithabody has signed on.

StupidxLamb: ROSALIE! CONTROL YOUR HUSBAND!!!!!!

Hottiewithabody: EMMETT! I TOLD YOU NOT TO EAT CHOCOLATE!!!

toughteddybear: I CAN'T HELP IT!!!!!!! ROSALIE, KILL THE WORM!! NOW!!!!!!! UGG BOOTS!!! UGG BOOTS!!!!!!!!

Doyoufeelit: OH MY GOD, SHUT UP!!!!!!!!

Hottiewithabody has signed off.

toughteddybear: NO!!!!!!!! SHE LEFT!!!!!!!! I'M GONNA CRY MYSELF TO SLEEP TONIGHT!!!!!

MasochisticVlion: emmett, you're a vampire!!!! YOU. DON'T. SLEEP!!!!!!!

toughteddy: STOP YELLING AT ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LEBRON JAMES IS GONNA HIT YOU WITH A BLUE SWORD!!!!!!!

Shortstopxshopper: that won't hurt us!!!!!!!

StupidxLamb: IT'LL HURT ME!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!! EDWARD SAVE ME!!!

MasochisticVlion: I'll always be saving you, love.

toughteddybear: why are you guys always mushy-gushy!!!

MasochisticVlion has signed off.

StupidxLamb has signed off.

Doyoufeelit has signed off.

Shortstopxshopper has signed off.

toughteddybear: THIS IS EMMETT CULLEN SIGNING OFF! THANK YOU, AND DRIVE SAFE!!!

toughteddybear has signed off.

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MasochisticVlion has signed on

toughteddybear has signed on

toughteddybear: hey, edward! I'M NOT EATING CHOCOLATEEE!!! I'M ON A DIET!!

MasochisticVlion: k, than why are you all hyper?

toughteddybear: I'm Emmett...

MasochisticVlion: oh yeah...

StupidxLamb has signed on.

StupidxLamb: EDWARD!!!!

MasochisticVlion: lol, hey sweetie.

StupidxLamb: and... EMMETT!

toughteddybear: BELLA! girlfriend, it's been so long!! kisses! *kisses both of Bella's cheeks*

Stupidxlamb: oh, doll face!

MasochisticVlion: I FEEL SO UNLOVED!

StupidxLamb: I love you Edward!

MasochisticVlion: I love you too!

toughteddybear: WINTER TIME! MAPLE TREES! PANCAKES! FLYING SQUIRRELS! MAH-JONGG!

StupidxLamb: hahaa!

MasochisticVlion: Is Sugar-Emmy hyper again?

StupidxLamb: HAHAHAHA! SUGAR-EMMY!!! GOOD ONE, BABE!

toughteddybear: YOU GUYS ARE HURTING MY FEELINGS! CUT! CUT! *runs into the emo corner* I HAVE NO FRIENDS!

MasochisticVlion: hahaha, this is fun!

Doyoufeelit has signed on

Doyoufeelit: guys, why is emmett sitting in the corner with his laptop, playing with Alice's old barbies, and screaming CHARGE! and then the barbies attack each other?!

StupidxLamb: HAHAHAHAHAHHAAH!!!!!!!!!!

MasochisticVlion: hahaha!!!! yeah that's our fault...

toughteddybear: OMG! AN ADD FOR THE NEW POWER RANGER LUNCH BOX SET JUST POPPED UP!!!!! THEYRE SELLING AT WAL-MART!

Doyoufeelit: omg, no way! *rolls eyes*

toughteddybear: CRANK DAT SOULJA BOY, GIRLFRIEND!!!! BRING DOWN THE CLOUDS!!!!! WHAT?! WHAT DID HE SAY?!

StupidxLamb: Someone get this kid help!

Wolfyduhduhduh has signed on.

MasochisticVlion: What do you want, mutt?

Wolfyduhduhduh: I was hoping Bella would be on so I could apologize.

StupidxLamb: Well I don't accept! Jacob, just go away.

toughteddybear: peek-a-boo! I see you! woooops, gotta go potty!

Doyoufeelit: EMMETT, STOP!

Wolfyduhduhduh: bye, weirdos.

Wolfyduhduhduh has signed off

MasochisticVlion: for once, Em, I'm grateful! You got Jacob away so he couldn't talk to Bella.

StupidxLamb: what if I wanted to talk to Jacob?

MasochisticVlion: uh...um...I'm...sorry?

StupidxLamb: Edward, I was just kidding.

toughteddybear: yeah edward, don't cry! HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!

Doyoufeelit: Emmett, it's JANUARY!

toughteddybear: WHERE'S ROSALIE?!

MasochisticVlion: shopping with Esme and Alice

toughteddybear: I NEED HER!

StupidxLamb: YOUR ANNOYING!

Doyoufeelit: Emmett, why aren't my calm waves working?!?!

toughteddybear: I WANT MY DADDY!!!!! HE USED TO FEED ME SAUERKROUT!

MasochisticVlion: thanks for sharing.

toughteddybear: *goes into gangsta mode* ya'll welcome, dawg

Doyoufeelit: oh god.

Doyoufeelit has signed off.

StupidxLamb: EDWARD!

MasochisticVlion: BELLA!

StupidxLamb: EDWARD!

MasochisticVlion: BELLA!

StupidxLamb: EDWARD!

MasochisticVlion: BELLA!

toughteddybear: SACKAJEWIA!

MasochisticVlion: sackajewia?! why are you talking about her?!

toughteddybear: cause! she went on that cool expedition with Cloius and Lark!

MasochisticVlion: its Loius and Clark, idiot!

toughteddybear: IDIOT WENT TO?!

MasochisticVlion: god help this child...

toughteddybear: HEHE!

MasochisticVlion: you think your annoyingness is funny?

toughteddybear: yeah, kinda. Isn't it, Bella?

*****15 seconds later*****

MasochisticVlion: Bella? Are you there, sweetheart?

**10 seconds later**

toughteddybear: Belly button?

**30 seconds later**

MasochisticVlion: BELLA! SAY SOMETHING!

StupidxLamb: CALM YOURSELVES!! What, I'm not aloud to get cereal?

MasochisticVlion: Sorry sweetie. I thought you might have fallen off your chair...again.

StupidxLamb: are you making fun of me?!?! you don't love me?!?!?!

MasochisticVlion: no, bella, I still love you! I wasn't trying to make fun of you either, I'm sorry!!

toughteddybear: aww hehehehe.

StupidxLamb: edward, I was just kidding. Lol, you got so upset babe.

MasochisticVlion: I thought you were mad at me! *puppy dog face*

StupidxLamb: awwww! I love your puppy dog face!

toughteddybear: SHUSH GIRL! SHUT YO LIPS! DO THE HELLAN KELLER, AND TALK WITH YOUR HIPS!

StupidxLamb: I love that song! She wants to touch me, whoaa! She wants to love me, whoaa! She'll never leave me whoaa whoaa!

MasochisticVlion: don't trust a hoe, never trust a hoe, don't trust a hoe, won't trust me!!!!!!

toughteddybear: yayy! we're great singers!!!

StupidxLamb: tell your boyfriend, if he says he's got beef!

MasochisticVlion: That I'm a vegetarian

toughteddybear: and I ain't fuckin scared of him!

StupidxLamb: yay! I'm listening to that song right now! hehe : )

toughteddybear: NO ONE CARES!!!!!

MasochisticVlion: Emmett! don't be mean to Bella!

toughteddybear: WHATEVER!

toughteddybear has signed off

MasochisticVlion: Bella, do you wanna come over?

StupidxLamb: ok, I'll be over soon! I love you!

MasochisticVlion: I love you too!

StupidxLamb has signed off

MasochisticVlion has signed off