Well, you guys asked for this. DOWN TIME 2 ½! Because you all seemed to make a big deal over Down Time 1 and 2 and I thought, "Hey, give the readers what they want!"
So here you are. More random stuff involving your favorite Zelda peoples and places and situations and randomness. LET IT BEGIN!
THE TEMPLE OF TIME
"This Dominion Rod thing is awesome!" Link cheered, throwing the little yellow ball of light in all directions, letting it hit the wall, and then ducking as it sped back towards the Rod. "And this really burns calories!"
Midna sighed, once again cursing the Gods for choosing the most annoying person in all of Hyrule to be a hero. She floated to the floor and stood there, watching Link dodge the life-giving ball of light like it was fire.
"Link, sidi dison!" Midna finally said after about twenty minuets. "Nichaa!"
"In a minuet!" Link jumped over the ball of light and watched it hit the opposite wall and come rocketing back at him. He dived backwards and it just narrowly missed.
Midna gave Link the Death Glare but he didn't seem to notice, as he was preoccupied by the shiny little ball of light. He must have some degree of ADHD or ADD or something.
"Link, diweon sosd suwquo." Midna stated very firmly, knowing that that would get his attention.
"What? Zelda likes another guy?" Link's blue eyes got wide and the little ball of light smacked him upside the face before returning to the Rod.
Midna, of course, rolled with laughter at the sight of Link standing there wondering what the heck hit him. After about twenty seconds he realized what it was and he growled, "Ok, that's not funny anymore. Let's go and get through this freaking dungeon thing."
So get through this freaking dungeon thing they began to do…until they came to a slight probablem.
"Why is there a giant golden bell thing in the middle of this room?" Link asked, walking around what indeed appeared to be a giant golden bell. "Am I suppost to stand in it?"
He stood in the middle of it and looked up, but no alien technology came down to teleport him off to the Enterprise or anything. In fact, all he managed to do was allow Midna to say how dumb he looked standing there under a big bell.
"Ok, then, do you know how these work…if they even work at all?" Link asked, thoroughly annoyed.
"No." Midna shook her head, still smiling brightly. "Nusiw diyus ixyo?"
"I don't think you're suppost to throw anything up there… But maybe the Dominion Rod can do something!" Link pulled out his favorite item and flicked the end at the top of the bell. The little yellow ball hit the underside of the bell and rocketed back towards his head.
This is a recording on peper of what happened next:
EEEYYAAA-
THUNK…GOOOONG
VROOOOOM
EEH HEE HEE!
"Be quiet, Midna!" Link got up and rubbed the places on his head where the strangely dense ball of light had hit him and where he had fallen on the bell. The Dominion Rod continued with its strange humming/vrooming sound.
"So I guess that won't work." Link mumbled, glaring at the bell like he wanted nothing better than to turn into a wolf and bite it. He settled for kicking it as hard as he could instead.
THUNK…GOOOONG
EEEYYAAA!
EEH HEE HEE!
"BE QUIET, MIDNA!" Link wailed, hopping around on one foot. "THAT HURT! STUPID, WORTHLESS BELL THING! WHY I AUGHTA…"
He raised the Master Sword and brought it down on the bell's side.
CLANG…GOOOONG
CRACK
And thus this is how the Liberty Bell's crack was really made.
Midna, meanwhile, sat cross-legged on the ground and watched Link as he cursed the bell out when he knew perfectly well that it was inanimate and had no ears. Humans were so stupid sometimes; Midna wondered why the Gods bothered with them at all.
"Sokem, Link." She finally said, telling him to get a move on so they could get out of the bell-infested dungeon.
Link's face was red but he continued after her, occasionally mumbling things under his breath Midna was glad she couldn't hear. They entered into another room, this one also containing a bell.
"AAAGH THEY'RE EVERYWHERE! THIS TEMPLE IS TRYING TO KILL ME!"
Midna rolled her eyes and told Link to deal with it and move on.
All was well until they came to a giant statue blocking their path. Link tried in vain to push it aside, shove it aside, kick it aside, curse it aside, and finally…bang his head on it aside.
Luckily Midna shoved him away from the statue before he could really do some damage to himself. "Dominion Rod, Link." She sighed.
"I hate that thing now." Link muttered.
Midna then proceeded to grab the Rod and whack Link fifty times over the head with it until he overcame the strange fear and began to fear her instead.
"Ok! Ok! Stop! Ow!" He wailed, shielding himself with the now slightly cracked Rod. He backed up and flung the yellow orb at the statue.
It ignited the small flame of life in its chest and it began to follow Link's every move. He had a lot of fun teaching a statue how to square dance, much to Midna's horror.
"Sokem, Link!" Midna narrowed her eye and barred her teeth in a snarl.
"Ok, ok! Come on, best buddy statue of mine! Let's go explore this crazy temple thing!" Link announced, and then they were off.
The next room consisted of enemies and Link easily disposed of them, but that wasn't the bad part. They found a treasure chest and upon opening it, found a Red Rupee; still, that wasn't the bad part. Link did a happy dance on account of the Rupee and technically this qualifies as bad…but for right now it's unimportant. Ignore that, please. The author had a long day at school.
Anyway, after Link completed the Happy Dance of Horror, they discovered….
The wall.
The wall was blocking their paths from one room to the next; and all the weapons Link had didn't seem like enough to blast through it. Midna tapped on the wall to see if it was really as solid as it looked and nearly broke her knuckles. Yep, they were going to be stuck there for a while.
"Now what?" Link asked out loud as Midna cursed loudly and waved her hand everywhere. "I don't think bomb arrows will be able to blast through this."
Midna thought of all the English she actually knew and shouted, "OH, REALLY?"
"Yeah. Oh, well. I needed a break anyway." Link slumped against the wall and pulled out an Ocarina and began to play a sad tune.
Midna's hand eventually began to return to normal and she sat on the statue's head and listened to the song. It was sad, long and beautiful, like a lone bird's flight through the skies. When Link finished the song, Midna was shocked. It ended so abruptly.
"Wikco?" She asked.
"I wrote that." Link said proudly. "Took a while, but I plan to play this to Zelda at some point. To show her how much I really care for her and how our love will never diminish…"
Midna rolled her eyes.
"Anyway, I got the inspiration from watching that hawk in Ordon flying around. When I was a wolf a while back…you remember this, I think…he told me how lonely it was to fly around day after day after day with nowhere to go."
Midna only remembered all too well. The bird's story was so sad…and then Link told it that it should write poetry that rivaled Edgar Allen Poe.
"Ok, anyway, I'm ready to figure out the mystery of why a wall is just randomly in the room like this!" Link got up and put the Ocarina away and eyed the wall. "Hmm…"
With that, he bent down and retrieved the Dominion Rod, lined the walking statue up next to the wall, and swung the Rod downwards.
The statue's arms reacted almost similar to his own and the hammer it had smashed into the top of the wall, offering a way through the room. Link began to dance in circles, the statue mimicking him.
"Yes, Midna! We did it! I love this thing!"
Midna rolled her eyes and wondered what she would do if she had never met this kid. All of the possibilities were positive and involved kicking Zant and Ganondorf's butts.
So the statue followed behind Link and into the next room, with Midna floating along beside them.
"AAAGH! A CREEPY THING!" Link wailed, holding the Dominion rod in front of him as a creepy thing crossed his path. "SAVE ME, STATUE BUDDY!" And he swung the Rod down, forgetting that the statue was standing directly behind him.
With a loud CRACK the hammer hit Link on the head and he passed out.
Midna then couldn't get the song Can't Touch This by MC Hammer out of her head as she laughed so hard she got hiccups combined with a terribly sore throat.
And that's what I did at the Temple of Time. I made a new buddy, Statue! He was nice until he tried to club me unconscious. Then I ditched him and moved on. Anyway, more Down Time to come!