Broken

Harry sighed as he saw Ginny enter the Gryffindor common room, wishing he knew how to put his chaotic feelings into words. He knew his life growing up with the Dursley's had left him totally unprepared to deal with anything that had to do with his feelings for the female sex.

With a pained expression, he watched as Ginny called out to some of her year-mates and laughed at something Colin Creevy said to her. She was smiling and chatting animately as she headed over to the table in the corner where she set her bag down, took out her books and began to work on her homework.

He felt his heart squeeze as he wished he could be sitting there with her and be talking to her as easily as others were able to do.

Without noticing the look of concern Hermione was giving him, he rose, and said softly, "I'm heading up to bed." Not waiting or caring if he got a reply.

Hermione watched him go, and her heart ached for her friend. She had pieced enough together to know that Harry didn't know how to go about approaching anyone, let alone Ginny who he was utterly taken with.

She had watched as he had become more and more taken with her, noticing his eyes tracking her whenever she was in the same room with him. She had seen the longing in his look as he tracked her every movement and the pained look that had come over his face, though she was sure he was unaware he was doing so.

Sighing, she glanced at Ron who she knew to be oblivious to what Harry was going through let alone that he was taken with Ron's sister.

Rolling her eyes as she shook her head, she said "Good night, Ron," her voice dripping with her disgust at his total lack of awareness.

"Huh?" Ron replied, his head snapping up. He saw Hermione rising and figured out what she had said. "Good night, Hermione."

As she entered her dorm, Hermione was deep in thought as to how she could help Harry without seeming to push him too much. She knew if she approached him directly he would just get all defensive and clam up tight on her and she'd get nowhere.

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Ginny sighed to herself, watching Harry head up to the boy's dorms, wishing that he would notice her as she so desperately wanted. She wasn't sure but she thought that he had been watching her for quite some time now, but she hadn't really caught him at it.

It was just that she had this feeling for the past few weeks that someone was watching her and the only one who seemed to be around every time it had happened was Harry.

For all her Gryffindor courage, she still found it hard to approach Harry, her brother Ron being the main reason. He had been a real prat about any of the boys she had dated and she didn't want that to happen between him and Harry, they had been best mates since their first year.

Glancing up as Harry was going up the stairs, she could have sworn that Harry's eyes had flitted her way before the raven haired boy had disappeared. Taking another deep breath, she let it out slowly, hoping against hope that she hadn't imagined the whole thing.

She noticed Hermione rising and heading up to girl's dorms and made a promise to herself to speak to the bushy haired girl to see if she couldn't get some insight about Harry from her.

Sighing once more, she turned her attention back to her Transfiguration essay, knowing that she had at least another couple hours work before she could quit for the night.

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Ginny was having the day from hell and it was driving her to the breaking point. It was as if nothing could go right and she prayed that the day would end quickly. So far she had gotten berated by Snape for messing up her potion, though she knew it had been better than just about anyone else's in her class.

Then came Charms and though she had been trying hard to pay attention to Flitwick, that stupid Ravenclaw girl had asked her to pass a note and though she really didn't want to, she had taken the damn thing before she realized it. Just her luck, that was the moment that Flitwick had turned towards her and caught her passing the note and of course the Ravenclaw denied that she was involved. Luckily it only cost her a few points and not a detention.

Lunch wasn't to bad, though she noticed Harry's eyes flitting her way and though it was something she wanted, she found it a bit irritating that he wouldn't gather up enough nerve to come and talk to her. Sighing she finished hurriedly and made her way to Transfiguration class.

Once again her luck held true to form and she found herself thinking about Harry and not paying attention to class. She was so deep in thought that it took several moments to realize that Professor McGonagall was calling her name.

The disapproving "Really Miss Weasley, where is your mind today?" stung along with costing Gryffindor another five points.

Then as she was leaving class, McGonagall stopped her and lectured her on proper classroom decorum, just adding to the "wonderful" day she was having. Colin's knowing smirk didn't help in the slightest either.

She threw him a glare that didn't have the desired effect, he just smiled all the more as they headed back to the common room.

Ginny managed to ignore everything else and headed right up to her dorm and flopped on her bed, groaning in frustration over the day she was having. Shaking her head, she silently hoped that her evening would go better.

Joining her dorm mates she headed down to dinner and as soon as she got to the common room, she felt someone watching her. Letting her eyes scan the room, she noticed Harry's eyes following her every move. With the way her day was going, she felt her anger rising. Gritting her teeth, she shook her head and went to dinner.

All through dinner, she could feel Harry watching her, and she could see him look away whenever she looked his way, further making her ire raise.

Things came to a head that evening, she had gone to the library to study, wanting to stay out of the common room, just to give herself a break from Harry's constant scrutiny.

Her study time went well, and she felt her anger was somewhat under control as she headed back to the common room. She had just left Luna and a couple of others and was walking down a deserted corridor when a hand came from nowhere and grasped her arm.

Appearing from seemingly nowhere was Harry and he had a hold of her arm.

Ginny's tenuous hold on her temper snapped and she turned to Harry. "What are you some kind of freak?" she yelled. "Creeping up on me like that!"

Barely noticing, she saw Harry recoil in horror, removing his hand from her arm as if he had been burnt.

Ginny turned slightly, and closed her eyes, fighting hard to get her temper under control. She knew it wasn't really Harry's fault, but just the accumulation of everything she had gone through during the day. Taking a deep breath, she turned back to Harry and said, "I'm sorry . . . ." but as her eyes opened, to her surprise, Harry had disappeared.

Sighing in frustration, she turned and headed back toward the common room, vowing to talk to Harry as soon as she could and explain to him that she hadn't meant to yell at him.

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The word "FREAK!" kept echoing through Harry's mind. Bringing all the suppressed abuse he had suffered from his relatives racing through his brain. Stumbling back from her, he swung his Invisibility Cloak over himself and he turned and fled.

He wasn't even aware of his surroundings as he made his way running through the halls, tears streaming down his face as his mind was taken over by the horrors that he had lived.

His Aunt's and his Uncle's words reverberating. "You're a Freak boy!" "No one will ever love someone like you!" "FREAK!" "You're a freak!"

Harry was barely aware as he stumbled up some little used stairs, leading out on to one of the lesser towers of the school. Falling down in one of the corners, he finally succumbed to the demons in his mind, sitting huddled under his cloak, lost in a world of his own.

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Ron awoke Friday morning and groaned as he stretched, grabbing his pillow and throwing it at Harry's bed to awaken him as he always did if Harry hadn't awoken him.

"Get up you git," he called out as he grabbed his towel and headed for the showers.

As he finished up, Ron was surprised that Harry hadn't showed up as Dean, Seamus and Neville had to get ready for the day. Shaking his head he headed back out to the dorm wondering why Harry would be having such a lay in, hoping his best mate wasn't sick.

To his surprise, Harry's bed was empty, showing no sign that it had been slept in. He knew Harry hadn't been there because his own pillow rested where he had thrown it to wake Harry up. Dressing hurriedly he headed down to the common room to see if anyone had seen Harry.

As he descended the stairs he swung his head toward the couches in front of the fire where they always met before heading down to breakfast but Hermione was the only one sitting there.

She looked questioningly as he came over. "Where's Harry?" she asked with concern.

Ron just shrugged, "I don't know," he replied softly, not wanting to draw attention to the fact that Harry was missing. They made there way to breakfast, hoping that he would show up there, but when it came time to leave for class he still hadn't shown up.

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Everyone sat in the Gryffindor common room, having been ordered there after dinner by Professor McGonagall.

Ginny looked around and took in who was there, the only ones missing seemed to be Ron, Hermione and Harry. She sighed and wondered what they had gotten up to now.

The rest of the Gryffindors seemed restless, wanting to get on with their evenings, some even grumbling about the missing three and what they could have done that all the Gryffindors needed to be called together.

Fortunately their wait wasn't long as the portrait hole opened and Professor McGonagall came in, preceded by a very worried looking Ron and Hermione.

As Ginny was taking that in, her thoughts were brought back to focus by McGonagall who cleared her throat, silencing the room.

"Has anyone seen Mr. Potter recently?" the Professor asked.

Everyone looked at one another, and low talking ranged around the room.

Several people said how they had seen him at lunch and dinner the previous day and Ginny felt her heart squeeze as she realized that she had probably seen him last.

"Professor," she said softly. "I saw him right before curfew last night."

Ginny flinched as the Professor's gaze landed on her, seemingly piercing right through her, holding her gaze for several moments before she looked around the room and said "Did anyone see him after that?"

When no one spoke, McGonagall turned her attention back to Ginny and said "Please come with me Miss Weasley."

As Ginny went to join her, the Professor said, "The rest of you are dismissed."

Ginny was surprised at the pace that their head of house set as they made their way to her office and she realized there was a sense of urgency to the Professor's actions.

For the first time, Ginny felt afraid for Harry, the hurt look that had flashed over his face when she had snapped at him coming into focus for the first time. Shaking her head, she chided herself for not recalling it sooner, somehow she knew she had done something terrible without realizing it.

The Professor had Ginny sit down and quickly took her seat, facing her she got right to the point. "Please tell me when and where you last saw Harry?" she asked.

Though McGonagall tried to sound calm, Ginny could hear the sense of urgency that underlay the request.

"I was coming back from the Library when Harry startled me," Ginny said softly, not being able to meet the Professor's eyes.

When Ginny paused, McGonagall pressed her for more information, "Then what, Miss Weasley?"

Ginny closed her eyes and cringed, "I yelled at him," she replied. "See, I'd been having a bad day and . . ."

McGonagall cut her off, "What did you say to him?"

"I yelled at him asking was he some kind of a freak for the way he was acting," Ginny said in a whisper.

Ginny heard McGonagall's sharp intake of breath, "Oh Ginny, you didn't."

Ginny's first reaction was to try and justify her reaction, but even as the thought's formed in her mind, she let them die. Something in McGonagall's voice, and the use of her first name tore at her heart and she realized she had done something to hurt Harry.

"I'm sorry," she whispered as she shut her eyes, feeling her heart squeeze tight.

Instead of being reprimanded, she felt the Professor's hand gently pat hers.

"Can you show me where you were?" the Professor asked.

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Ron and Hermione sat waiting by the fireplace, worried about Harry and wondering what Ginny could tell them about his disappearance.

They didn't need to wait long, when Ginny came back into the common room, her head down and a very concerned look upon her face.

It appeared that she was going to go right past them when Ron sprang up. "Ginny!" he yelled at his sister.

Ginny glanced at her brother and then hurried past him, heading right up to her dorm.

Hermione noticed the forlorn look on Ginny's face and she rose to follow. "Let me talk to her," she said to Ron.

Ron threw up his hands and with an exasperated look he sat back down. "Fine," he said in disgust. "Just let me know what's going on, if you don't mind."

Hermione rolled her eyes but didn't comment, instead she headed off after Ginny. She found her sitting on the edge of her bed, head down and looking very troubled.

"What's wrong?" she asked softly.

"It's all my fault," Ginny whispered.

"How do you come to that conclusion?" Hermione asked as she came over and sat down next to Ginny.

Ginny glanced at Hermione several times, ashamed at what she had learned from McGonagall.

"I, I, . . well see, I yelled at Harry when he startled me," Ginny began. When Hermione went to say something, Ginny cut her off. "I called him a freak," she said lowly.

Hermione's shoulders sagged, "Oh Ginny, you didn't." she said in despair.

"I know," Ginny responded, "at least now. McGonagall told me some about Harry's childhood and then it made sense."

Hermione nodded, deciding not to further chastise the disheartened young red-head.

For the next hour Ginny and Hermione sat and discussed Harry's childhood and what they surmised about his life growing up at the Dursley's. In the end, Hermione went to fill Ron in on what had happened, leaving a spent Ginny, curled up on her bed.

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Saturday rolled into Sunday and though the staff, ghosts and other residents of Hogwarts had all been told to look for Harry, he couldn't be found.

Dumbledore's instruments could only tell him that Harry was still within the confines of Hogwarts but could not pinpoint him any further than that.

He was getting constant updates from the denizens of the Castle but to no avail, Harry remained missing.

Sighing to himself, he turned his attention back to the mountain of parchments on his desk and though he tried to concentrate on them, he found his attention kept going back to the poor missing boy and not for the first time he wondered if he had been mistaken to keep sending him back to his relatives every summer.

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Sunday morning dawned bright but cold and Ginny was beside herself with guilt. She sighed as she walked up the narrow staircase, her mind more on her thoughts of Harry than where she was actually going. She let herself out on the top of the tower and stared off into the distance, not really seeing the scenery, lost in her own thoughts.

Shaking her head, she tried hard to get a grip on her chaotic thoughts. "Why is it so hard?" she asked herself.

"Did I really cause Harry to disappear? Was it what I said?" She was beside herself in grief, and that grief turned to anger at herself for not realizing just how damaged and fragile Harry really was.

"I'm to blame," she thought. "I need to find him and make it up to him some way. How could I be so stupid!" she chided herself.

She got no answer other than the chill wind blowing her hair around and she wrapped her arms tightly around herself, trying to keep as warm as possible. She didn't feel ready to head back to the Gryffindor common room just yet.

Ginny thought hard about what Hermione and McGonagall had both said. Why hadn't she seen how horribly his relatives had treated him. She was supposed to be the one who was so enamoured with the boy, how could she have missed it?

Time slipped by without notice as Ginny went over everything she could remember about Harry and his life as she knew it. Now in hindsight it was all there to see, the lack of outwardly expressing his feelings, his awkwardness with others, especially females. How he never initiated any form of physical contact, how he'd hardly ever meet ones eyes when speaking.

"Oh, Harry," she cried out softly. "Why was I so blind?" she said, a tear forming, slowly making it's way down her check.

The wind swirled around her making her shiver violently and she heard a low moaning sound she took to be the wind. Ginny shook herself and turned towards the door, wanting nothing more than to get back in front of the fire to warm herself after standing out in the cold for almost the whole afternoon.

Just as she reached for the door handle, she heard another soft moaning sound. Only this time the wind had dropped and she knew it hadn't been making the sound.

Ginny turned and looked around the confines of the top of the tower, wondering if her ears had played tricks on her.

Then she noticed something by the back edge, tucked in the lengthening shadow of the roof top, there was a small . . . something, that seemed to be moving or shaking.

Drawing her wand she crept closer to see what it was. At first she couldn't make out what her eyes were resting on and it wasn't till she almost right on top of it that she realized that it was the edge of a shoe, and something seemed to be rippling over it, making it appear and partially disappear.

Her mind took a moment and then she realized that the only thing that could be doing that was if something was making it disappear, something like Harry's Invisibility Cloak.

Ginny darted the last few feet and dropped to her knees, gently reaching out and grasping at the spot where the partial shoe was. Though it seemed like she was grasping nothing, her fingers felt the smooth silkiness of cloth. She lifted it up and a body slowly came into view.

There curled up, shivering so violently his body was actually bouncing on the hard cold surface of the tower, was Harry.

Ginny couldn't believe her eyes as she took in the sight of him. His skin was literally blue and his normally vibrant green eyes looked frosted and dull. His teeth were chattering so loudly she could hear them over the wind.

"Harry!" she called out in shock.

If she was expecting a response, she was disappointed as he lay there unresponsive to her entreaty.

Ginny looked around wildly, wondering how she was going to get help when Harry's body gave out a deep rattling breath, his body slumping, and it fell completely still. It took just a moment for her to realize that Harry had ceased breathing.

Ginny's eyes widened in shock and she was frozen in place for a moment, her breath coming in sharp rasps. Fighting the sense of panic, Ginny knew she had just moments or Harry would be lost forever.

"Oh, please!" she pleaded softly, "Oh please, no."

She rolled him flat and tore at his robes and shirt, opening them up so she could get to his chest. Closing her eyes and concentrating with all of her might, she laid her hands on the cold still form before her.

"Ego tribuo vos meus vita" she cried out desperately.

Ginny felt the magic build within her and she became aware of a feeling of warmth come to the cold flesh that laid beneath her hands. Unseen by her a brilliant blue light enveloped her, flowing down her arms and through her hands into Harry's body. She was dimly cognizant of Harry's chest rising and she smiled briefly, then blackness took her.

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Professor McGonagall entered the Gryffindor common room, looking for Ginny Weasley, as far as she could determine, she had been the last to see Harry. No one else had reported seeing him in the last two days and she hoped that the young red-head might be able to give her something more to go on.

Sighing, she looked around the room, hoping to spot the young Gryffindor amongst the assembled students.

"Has anyone seen Miss Weasley?" she called out.

Everyone stopped what they were doing, glanced around before looking at one another.

"Um, I saw her just after lunch," Colin Creevy said hesitantly.

"Do you know where she went?" the Professor asked.

Colin look uncomfortable, "Not really, Professor," he replied.

When he saw the annoyed look on her face he added apologetically, "She said she needed to think about some things and headed off." He winced when he watched McGonagall's lips narrow into a sharp line and she breathed out in displeasure.

"All I know is that when she goes off to think, I'm pretty sure she heads to one of the towers. Her hair is usually wind blown when she comes back," the slight young boy said softly.

"Thank you Mr. Creevy," the staid Professor replied before spinning on her heel and stalking out of the room.

Colin sighed in relief and collapsed back into his chair, glad he was no longer the object of their stern professor's attention.

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Ginny awoke and looked around her, puzzled at where she was. Nothing look familiar and it was obvious to her that she wasn't at Hogwarts any longer.

The terrain was a dull, broken landscape, with a few stunted bushes and trees being the only things that broke the expanse of her surroundings. The sky was an ugly slate greyish colour, the low pressing clouds turning and tumbling slowly making everything take on a muted cast.

With a frown, Ginny began to walk forward, feeling compelled to move for some inexplicable reason. She hadn't been walking for very long when she noticed something before her in the distance, its subtle motion drawing her eyes.

As she walked closer she shook her head, not being able to make out what it was at first. It wasn't till she was almost to it when she figured out is was a small figure, huddled under a tattered, threadbare blanket.

Pulling up short, she realized the person was shaking and trying to cover themselves up as if they didn't want to be noticed.

"Excuse me," Ginny said softly, not wanting to startle the person.

Ginny was surprised as the form jerked at her words as if they had been struck, huddling tighter under the blanket in what Ginny could tell was fear.

"I won't hurt you," Ginny said kindly, keeping her voice soft and non-threatening.

"Stay away," said a small voice, as the figure pulled the remnants of the blanket still tighter.

Ginny pulled up short, about five feet from the huddled boy, his voice telling her that he was male. Thinking hard, Ginny hunched down, sitting on her heels, trying to be as non-threatening as possible. "My name is Ginny. What's yours?" she asked softly.

"Go away," the boy said, his voice tinged with his fear.

Ginny watched in frustration as the boy turned his back to her and scooted a little farther from her. Taking a deep breath, she carefully made her way around till she was facing the youth. Once again she sat on her heals so that she was down at his level.

"I promise I won't hurt you," she all but whispered, her heart going out to the frightened boy.

The boy whimpered and huddled tighter into himself.

Slowly she watched as the boys head came up and there peeking out of the tattered blanket that he had tightly wrapped around himself were two of the most amazing eyes she had ever seen.

Ginny stared, wide-eyed in shock. For staring back at her were the emerald eyes she knew belonged to none other than Harry Potter.

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A/N:

Ego tribuo vos meus vita – I give you my life