Hello… (Nurse?) Angelica! (Hey, you are the one giving me the opening lines.) Oh, great; since when you developed that sense of humor? (Guess I'm spending too much time around Phil, Dil and Harold.) Maybe I should have them as assistants. (Maybe I should drop a piranha in your pants.) Okay, Miss Comedian, can you please say the disclaimer?
(Yes, of course. DISCLAIMER; Acosta doesn't own Rugrats or any related character… oh, come on, we really have to do this every time you do a story? Please, we already know you don't own any cartoon character and you'll never do!) Angie… (Yes, I know; legal stuff.)
Well, besides the whole copyright thing, we have to tell you people a good part of the story will be narrated. (Those parts will be on bold and italics, to avoid confusion.) That's right, and also the characters will be on their Rugrats age, so some words will be misspelled and have a few grammatical mistakes on purpose. (I like those stories, except for the babies' diapers… you can't get used to the smell no matter what.) Angelica, I just ate! (Oh, I'm making you sick… guess now I'll have to start the fic for you.) –sigh- Just do it, okay?
(Now, ladies and gentlemen, I, your favorite, most beautiful, graceful, marvelous…) Angelica, less than two lines, please. (Sure, ruin my fun. Okay, people, on with the show!)
Chuckson.
A Rugrats' story by Acosta Pérez José Ramiro.
- Sputter-Heroes.
"Oh, please, change the channel! Reptar's movie is about to start!" Lil said to Chuckie, who was the one using the remote control; being the oldest baby he was the only one who more or less knew how to operate it correctly. The DeVille girl had recognized the hour at the house's clock; the big hand pointing straight up and the little one pointing a little to its right.
"Okay… I think that Reptar is on the channel that has the number that looks like a stick and the other that looks like a donut." Chuckie started looking for those numbers when Tommy raised his little hand, him and the other babies sitting either at the couch or the floor, in front of the Pickles' TV, except Dil, who was currently with his mother.
"I like Reptar too, but I think the Non-Gang Turtles are about to start too!"
"Uh, well…" Chuckie was about to reply when Phil joined the debate.
"That program is good but I like Spidey-Man better. I want to see if he finally eats an insect."
"Uh, friends…" Chuckie was now cut by Kimi.
"Oh, can we see the Flower-Bangers? I like their toys and their colors are nice."
"Why all the sputter-heroes have to work at the same time?" Chuckie sighed. At that moment, Didi, carrying Dil, opened the door to let Angelica, Susie and Harold in, Charlotte following the children.
"You're taking care of Susie and Harold today, Charlotte?" Didi asked the blonde woman after greeting the three-year-old kids and telling them to go to the living room.
"Yes, Harold's mother asked me to keep an eye on him and, for some reason, Angelica always asks me to invite Susie whenever he comes home." Charlotte shrugged while walking to the kitchen with Didi. Of course, the reason Angelica asked for this was because, even if Harold was her friend, he could be quite annoying at times, and Angelica found easier to stand him when the Carmichael girl was around to help her.
The women entered the kitchen, where Boris and Minka, Didi's parents, were helping her prepare dinner.
"Hi, Charlotte; you brought Angelica?" Minka greeted the business woman, who nodded in reply.
"Yes; she's with Susie and her friend Harold watching TV with the babies."
"TV?" Boris rolled his eyes. "In my times, we had fun watching chicken races; they never stayed on the track but that made the races a lot more interesting."
"Oh, don't be so grumpy, Boris." Minka smirked at his husband. "You're the one who never misses 'Oprah'."
"Hey, some of the guests remind me our town's people. The one with the hairy back that married his horse and divorced two years later was exactly like my cousin Morty."
"Your family meetings must be quite fascinating." Charlotte whispered at Didi, who sighed and rolled her eyes.
"You have no idea." Didi then turned at her father. "Dad, can you go keep an eye on the children? We'll be a little busy here."
"Yeah, why not? I already finished smashing the potatoes, and that's the most I can cook without you having goat products at home." Boris said as walking out of the kitchen.
Meanwhile, the elder kids had joined the argument about what show to watch.
"Let's watch Dark King Duck. I like his entrance." Harold grinned and then tried to mimic the toon duck's voice. "I'm the… tenor that sings opera at night!"
"Yes, that's funny, but I like the show with the teenage robot better." Susie commented.
"Shows how little you know, Carmichael. The best sputter-heroes are the Powder-Puff Girls. I like the song." Angelica cleared her throat to sing. "Fighting mimes trying to say a word…"
"But their show isn't today, Angelica." Susie pointed, saving everyone's ears.
"You're always looking for silly details." The blonde frowned at the African-American while Chuckie seemed ready for a collapse.
"Uh, friends, can you please choose a sputter-hero? If we keep like this we're not going to see anyone." The geeky baby finally said.
"Well… uh… what sputter-hero you want to see, Chuckie?" Kimi asked her brother.
"Yes, the one with the control is who chooses the program." Susie pointed. "It's like a law or something."
"Well… I like Soup-A-Man." Chuckie finally admitted. "He's very nice and when he needs to fight a bad guy he just removes his glasses and turns strong, brave and gets that red big cape that looks so great."
"Too bad that doesn't work with you, Finster." Angelica pointed mockingly. "You're more useless without your glasses than with them… and that's saying a lot."
Angelica's words, as usual, put Chuckie's mood down to underground level.
"That wasn't nice, Angelica." Tommy frowned at his cousin.
"Yes, that was a very mean insult." Lil added.
"That was an insult? Then Angelica insults me when she calls me 'useless'?" Harold got a puzzled look while Susie rolled her eyes. Even if he was her age, Harold could be way more naïve than the babies.
"Okay, okay, don't get a rash in your diapers." Angelica sighed and turned at Chuckie. "Finster, I'm very, very sorry…"
Chuckie started getting a little smile.
"… about that you're totally useless without these!" Angelica smirked and, in a quick move, grabbed Chuckie's glasses and moved away from the other children.
"My glasses!" Chuckie gasped while extending his hands. He wasn't totally blind without the glasses but his sight was severely diminished.
"Angelica, bring those glasses back!" Susie snapped at the blonde while the babies frowned at Angelica.
"Yes, even I know that's bad!" Harold pointed at the Pickles girl. He usually stood all Angelica's insults and pranks without even noticing but he wasn't that clueless when she did mean stuff on other children.
"Only if you can catch me…" Angelica started running yet froze when noticing Boris was approaching.
"Hi, children; what are you doing?"
"Uh… eh… nothing, Grandpa Boris," Angelica quickly thought about an excuse. "I was just playing with the babies; I was about to hide the glasses so they could go find them."
"Ah, she was just playing." Harold got a relieved look while Susie sighed and placed a hand on his shoulder.
"You are lucky for being so nice, Harold." The girl shook her head while Boris got the glasses from Angelica and walked to the living room, giving them back to Chuckie. Angelica was glad her lie had saved her from grounding, but got a surprised expression when Chuckie recovered his glasses and the first thing he did was glaring at her; obviously, the geeky baby was getting tired of her constant abuse.
"And what were you watching on the television?" Boris asked the older children while giving an affective patting to each baby's head and sitting himself at the couch right next to Chuckie.
"We were trying to decide that, Mister Boris." Susie replied.
"Yes, we want to see a sputter-heroes show." Harold added.
Boris, more or less used to kids misspelling words, deduced what they really meant.
"Oh, yes, super heroes are very interesting and they do very awesome things. Back at home, our hero was Mister Stanislao."
"He could fly?" Angelica asked.
"No, but he could eat 20 pounds of cheese without taking a breath."
"Now he's my hero too." Harold chuckled while rubbing his belly; Phil, who didn't know what '20 pounds' meant but recognized when someone mentioned a large amount of food, did the same as the fatty boy.
"Then he's not a real sputter-hero." Angelica frowned. "Sputter-heroes have cool toys to fight bad guys, or very colorful clothing, or have sputter-powers like flying, running very fast or lifting very heavy things like cars or Mrs. DeVille."
"Lifting heavy things, uh?" Boris got a sly smile while sitting Tommy on his lap. "Well, I know the story of a hero who could do that and more."
"What could he do?" Susie asked.
"Ah, he was the strongest man in the world."
"Like Soup-A-Man?" Harold asked, Chuckie becoming quite interested in the story.
"A hero made of soup? The things TV people think." Boris thought while rolling his eyes. "Well, let me tell you the story and you kids decide." The old man cleared his throat and started.
"The story starts many, many years ago, when God punished the Israelites by letting the Philistines, who were mean and powerful, to dominate them."
"Whoa. And I think my mom is strict when not letting me watch Tee Vee." Angelica thought as sitting with the other children to hear the story.
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
The Israelites had to do all kind of things for the Philistines, like paying tribute to them and obey their rules. When God decided they had enough punishment, he sent an angel to tell a man he would have a very powerful son who would free their people as long as the kid followed some rules.
The narration set the scene in the typical biblical little town, with lots of villagers keeping their heads down while several soldiers (the Philistines) give them smug looks and mock them. The scene then showed Chaz Finster, in according clothing, walking through a field and then Susie, playing the role of the angel, landed in front of him.
"Whoa! Either you're an angel, or the last Philistine that hit my head did it too hard." Chaz said while rubbing his eyes.
"No. You're not seeing things." Susie replied. "I came here with a message from the big boss himself. You see, he decided you Israelites had enough, so he's sending a warrior that can get rid of the Philistines and help your people. He'll be your son."
"But I have no sons." Chaz said, confused, and then a baby cry is heard at a distance.
"Now you do. Go back home." Susie told the awed man while giving him a sheet of paper. "Oh, and before I forget, he has to do the things on this list. Basically, raise him to be a good kid, and, and never forget this, never cut his hair even if he wants to look like the last sensation boy band."
The man obeyed the angel, and so the kid, who was called Samson, was raised according to the instructions he received.
Then, the scene changed to a house where Kira is trying to comb Chuckie's hair; like everyone else, they also have the right clothing for the time and age but still conserve their glasses. Kira is wearing a white dress that covers most of her body while Chuckie wears brown vest and pants, black sandals and blue wristbands.
"I think this will be enough." Kira smiled at her handwork but, a split second later, Chuckie's hair is back to its usual messy self. "Oh, I give up!"
"What's wrong, dear?" Chaz, carrying Kimi, entered the room.
"His hair; I know we aren't supposed to cut it, but trying to comb it is a pain. Worse of all is that hair gel hadn't been invented yet." Kira sighed while the kid shrugged at her.
"Well, you remember what the angel said; he can't get his hair cut no matter what or he'll not be able to free us from the Philistines." Chaz pointed while putting Kimi on the floor, her brother joining the girl immediately to play with her.
"Yes, I know… but the moment after he does it, he is going to the stylist." Kira cleared before smiling and giving her husband a little kiss; she then took out a blue headband and put it on her son's head. "Oh, well, this must work on the meantime."
The adults started doing their chores while the kids walked out to the backyard and, being a biblical town, the backyard basically consists on pure open space all the way to the town's limits. The siblings walk where Tommy, Phil and Lil are taking care of some chicken and lambs while Dil looks at them.
"Hi. Are you new?" Kimi greeted them.
"Yes. The Philistines destroyed our house so we had to move here." Tommy told her.
"They are so bad that sometimes want to change my name." Phil groaned.
"And who are you?" Lil asked.
"I'm Kimi, and he's my big brother, Samson, but we all call him Chuckie because our daddy's name is Chaz so I don't know why calling him Sam's son." Kimi shrugged.
"Yes, but I like the two names." Chuckie shrugged. "You guys need help with your aminals?"
"A little; the lambs don't want to go back to their corral." Lil said. Chuckie nodded at her and then, without making any effort, carried two lambs, one under each arm, back to their corral. The kid repeated the operation several times without breaking a sweat.
"Whoa! You're very strong, Samson." Phil said in awe.
"Thanks. I've been that way since I can remember. Sometimes I carry my daddy when he's too tired to carry me." Chuckie replied in a good humored way.
"And he always lifts the couch when my ball rolls under it so I can get it back." Kimi added.
"It must be very nice to be so strong." Lil said while Chuckie sighed.
"Not that much. When I learned to grab things, I broke many of them by accident. And sometimes I still have accidents." Then, in a perfect cue, Chuckie tripped with a rock and, to stop his fall, extended his hand to grab a nearby tree; it worked but, due his strength, the tree was ripped from the ground, roots and all.
"Oops. Sorry." Chuckie gave everyone a sheepish smile and then replanted the tree, the other kids looking at him in awe.
"Guess we're lucky our only accidents happen when we drink too much water before bedtime." Phil commented.
"Well, I still think you're a nice guy. You want to play with us?" Tommy invited the geeky baby, who smiled in reply and joined them.
A while later the kids were playing with a ball, except Dil who's looking at them. Tommy kicks it to Phil and he throws it to Kimi, who passes to Lil who passes to Chuckie, who kicks it and goes up, up, up… and away.
"Maybe I hit it too hard." Chuckie sighed. "I'll go get it."
The boy ran in the direction he sent the ball while his friends wait for him. The kid, after running for a while, stopped when finding a sign reading 'Construction Site' and a destroyed tower, with lots of people emerging from the debris.
"And here I thought the Babel Tower would last forever." One man complained while emerging with the ball. "And a simple ball takes it down… I'm so going to sue the architect."
Chuckie gulped and got a sheepish smile. The man dropped the ball and then, without anyone noticing, the redhead grabbed it and left while whistling.