Disclaimer: I don't own Friends (unless you count the seasons on DVD, which I do own).
A/n: Hey all! This is my very 'Friends' fic ever. I've been wanting to write one for a while but didn't really get hit with any specific inspiration that I felt the burning desire to write, until this idea came along. So, this wee one-shot takes place the day Ross announces his engagement to Emily. Rachel's face got me and inspired this. Although I use the phrase, "This is how a heart breaks" a couple of times, this is not actually inspired by the Rob Thomas song (which is an awesome song!). I just happen to be using that same line. :) And, this is also a little experimentally abstract-ish.
This is how a heart breaks, she thought.
He announced his engagement to Emily, loud and proud for everyone to hear at once. She was in another room. Her breathing stopped and she numbly moved to stand in the doorway, certain she'd misheard – praying she'd misheard.
But she hadn't.
As if physically happening before her eyes, she saw her heart break. She imagined a perfectly shaped heart, sculpted from beautiful clear glass with swirling engravings across it's surface. There were some scratches and cracks, places where the heart had been repaired or temporarily welded back together. It was fragile and trying to become break-free again. Now it hit a solid concrete wall with incredible force and a deafening crash. It shattered, so completely that the pieces flew in every direction, seemingly never to be found or repaired again. She wondered why no one heard the smash. She wondered if they could hear the pieces falling to the ground around her. She could. She could hear them, see them, feel them, too.
He turned to face her, a little apprehensively it seemed, with his arm around Emily's shoulder.
She didn't know why it hurt so bad, why she cared, why her heart now lay in ruins, why she was suddenly willing to give anything in the world to be Emily at that moment. She had Joshua. She really, really liked Joshua and had for some time now. She broke up with Ross so long ago. He'd dated other women, she'd dated other men. They had agreed to move on. They had.
No, he moved on. She thought. I was still stuck thinking that someday we'd get over ourselves and get back together…
She knows she would dump Joshua in a heart beat if it meant being with Ross. She knows that now, for sure, without a doubt.
She doesn't want to let him know she still loves him. Not now, maybe not ever. Especially not when he just announced his engagement to someone else.
She quickly forces her face into a wide smile and throws her arms in the air. "Congratulations!" she squeals. She sounds completely fake, even to her own ears and desperately hopes no one notices. She tells him she's so happy for him and hates herself for lying so blatantly. She prays her lying isn't painfully obvious to him and Emily. She hugs him and blinks the stinging hot tears back before they pull apart.
After he leaves, she goes into her room and sinks down onto the bed. She gingerly puts a hand to her chest, wondering if she'll be able to feel a heartbeat. She doubts it, since her heart is a million tiny pieces spread across the ground, crunching under foot whenever she takes a step. She holds her hand over the spot where he heart used to be as several tears slide uninvited and unbidden down her cheeks.
This is how a heart breaks.
A/n: There we are. Someday I plan to write some more 'Friends' fics, but for now, this little Ross/Rachel one-shot is all I got. Thanks for reading, and of course reviews are always super appreciated. Later! :D