AN: Hey! So this is a story I wrote a long time ago and I found it, and I figured now would be a good time to post it. I can't wait for new Gilmore Girls! 3 Happy Holidays! Hope you guys like this!
"This is stupid" Jess muttered to himself.
"Stop complaining" Luke gruffed back.
"Why should I? This is all your fault" Jess said looking down at all the Christmas lights surrounding them.
They were standing outside the Gilmore garage surrounded by all the Christmas decorations that the Gilmore girls were able to pull out of their packed garage. It mostly consisted of large tangled piles of Christmas lights.
"How is it my fault?" Luke asked irritated.
"You're the one who offered to help in the first place!"
"Yeah, I said I would help. So what are you doing here?"
Jess glared at his uncle, "Because last night I was visited by three ghosts," he began sarcastically "and I saw the error of my ways and found the real meaning of Christmas is standing outside in the freezing cold, putting up Christmas lights with my uncle."
Luke stared at Jess for a moment, "So Rory made you huh?" Jess didn't reply as he continued to untangle the pile of lights in front of him. Luke grinned as he also reached down to grab more lights to untangle. "Man, she has you wrapped around her finger."
"No more than Lorelai has you" Jess replied dully not looking up from untangling.
There was a pause. "Wow, now I feel pathetic" Jess added as he realized what he had just said.
"Let's just get this over with" Luke said rolling his eyes.
"Whatever."
Two hours later they had made no progress.
"Goddamn these freaking lights!" snapped Jess throwing down a tangled group of lights he had been working on.
"Keep trying!" Luke snapped back as he pulled roughly on a group of lights he was working on.
Jess glared at Luke and then back at the lights in front of him. He took a deep breath trying to calm himself. He roughly grabbed the light and began to work on them again.
Fifteen minutes of struggling and cursing later Jess was done.
"That's it" he mumbled darkly, again throwing down the lights. He stormed toward the Gilmore's door.
"Hey! Where are you going?" Luke called after his irate nephew, but Jess did not reply.
Jess stormed into the kitchen. Lorelai looked up startled from pouring her coffee as Jess charged in.
"Hi!" she greeted Jess cheerfully.
"Hey" Jess answered back lowly, walking right past her. He walked over to her rarely used silverware drawer, and after rifling through it, pulled out a very sharp knife.
"He- hey Jess…? Whatcha doing?" Lorelai asked slowly backing away from him, half-jokingly. "What are you gonna do with that knife?"
"Kill your Christmas lights," Jess said turning his dark eyes from the knife to Lorelai. "One. By. One."
"Uh-huh" mumbled Lorelai taking another step back. "RORY!" she called.
Rory walked out of her room alarmed at her mother's sudden yelling. "Is everything okay?" she asked.
"Your boyfriend is going full Norman Bates." Lorelai explained as she grabbed Rory and pulled her in front of her for protection. Rory looked between her mother and her boyfriend even more confused than when she had walked out of her room.
At the sight of his girlfriend Jess instantly calmed down and lowered his weapon. He sighed and put the knife on the table.
Lorelai grinned evilly, she pushed Rory toward Jess. "Here take Marion and leave my Christmas lights alone Norman!"
Jess caught Rory as she stumbled forward. As Lorelai walked out of the kitchen to give the two a moment, Jess pulled Rory into him. Rory blushed as she grinned up at him.
"How you doing Clark Griswold?" Rory asked reaching out a hand to caress Jess' cheek. Jess leaned into her touch as he smiled down at her while rolling his eyes.
"I think I prefer the Norman Bates comparison."
"Well that's concerning" Rory replied with a laugh.
Jess didn't reply he leaned forward and kissed Rory who happily responded.
Luke was looking at the jumble of lights on the snow covered ground in front of him, waiting for Jess to return from wherever he went. Lorelai slowly snuck up behind him and reached around to cover his eyes with her hands. Luke almost jumped out of his skin, "What the-?!" he yelped.
"Guess who?" Lorelai said cheerfully, grinning at Luke's reaction.
"A hyperactive caffeine junkie" guessed Luke turning toward Lorelai.
"Yep!" Lorelai replied. "Hi," she added as their eyes met.
Luke pulled her into a kiss.
"What was that for?" Lorelai asked breathlessly as they pulled apart.
"Just in case Jess goes crazy and kills us all tonight." Luke replied.
"I called out Rory to calm him down."
"Good call."
Twenty minutes later as Luke finished the tea Lorelai had brought out to him, he turned to her and said "you better go break them apart. It's starting to get late and Jess and I've made almost no progress."
"Yeah and we've probably left them alone in there too long for their own good," Lorelai added getting up and walking into the house. "Rory! Jess! Where are you two? Adult walking in!" she called as she entered the house.
Rory and Jess had made their way from the kitchen to the couch in the living room. They pulled apart quickly. Jess practically flying to the other side of the couch as he pushed himself off Rory. Rory pulled herself upright and fixed her hair looking guiltily at her mom. Lorelai raised an eyebrow at the nervous teens.
"Alright Romeo back to work with you" Lorelai announced breaking the awkward tension in the room. Jess stood up and walked toward the door.
"Yeah, yeah I'm going." He mumbled walking past Lorelai
"Finally" Jess sighed almost two hours later as he looked up at the Gilmore house where he and Luke had just finished putting up all the lights. "Okay, plug them in!" Jess called toward Luke.
Luke plugged in the lights and the house instantly lit up. All the lights suddenly began to blink rapidly. Luke walked over to where Jess stood in front of the house.
"Are they supposed to be blinking like that?" Jess asked.
"Of course," said Luke "I think…" The pair looked up at the blinking lights for another moment. "Well, I guess we should get the girls."
"Whatever" Jess replied as he walked toward the house.
Moments later Lorelai and Rory ran out of their house pulling on their jackets as they ran through the snow. Jess followed slowly behind them.
"They're beautiful!" Rory said grinning from ear to ear looking at the lights with shining eyes. She grinned proudly up at Jess, who only rolled his eyes with a small smile as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders.
Lorelai nodded in agreement, "they are, but…"
"But what?" asked Luke.
"They're not supposed to be blinking"
"They're not?" asked Luke exasperated.
"No, I've never had a desire to give my neighbors a seizure" Lorelai joked.
"What about carolers?" asked Jess, "because I think this might be a great investment. Kirk won't be able to come near your house for once" Jess tried to sell the blinking lights.
"But they could cause a blackout or electrocute us if they're not supposed to be blinking" Rory said looking up apologetically at Jess.
Jess sighed "fine."
"Okay now what?" Jess asked looking up at the blinking lights. Rory and Lorelai had gone back into the house with the promise of cookies. Luke and Jess were both weary of the cookie.
"I have no idea" Luke replied looking up at the lights.
Jess walked up to some of the lights on the porch. He tapped on one of the blinking bulbs, and then like dominos they all went out. "What the hell?!"
"What did you do?" yelled Luke rushing up to Jess.
"All I did was tap the bulb!" Jess explained glaring at the culprit bulb.
"Great job Jess" Luke said sarcastically.
"Well why did they all go out?!"
"Because Jess when one goes out they all go out!"
"Well what freaking genius came up with that idea!"
Thirty minutes Luke and Jess were ready to try again. "Okay Luke, go ahead." Luke plugged in the lights…and nothing happened. "This is ridiculous" muttered Jess. Luke pulled out the plug , licked his fingers and put them to the plug, feeling the charge, Luke put the plug back in the outlet. Sparks flew, Luke fell back, and there was a giant flash. The outlet caught on fire.
"Shit!" Luke yelped jumping up, grabbing snow and throwing it onto the small flames. Jess ran over to help, but by the time he got there Luke had it all under control.
"Wow, that was pretty cool."
"What?!" barked Luke, not in any mood for Jess' snark. "Are you kidding me?! I was almost electrocuted and you say "cool." What is wrong with you?"
"Uncle Luke it was great, I saw your skeleton."
Luke glared at him "Jess I am so not in the mood for your ever so witty humor right now. Let's just keep going and get this over with." Both men turned toward the outlet and seemed to consider their options for a moment.
"Alright, go for it" Jess finally said.
"You do it"
"No."
"Come on Jess, you think its "cool" remember?"
"You really think I'm gonna risk getting electrocuted? You do it. It's too late for you anyway."
"What? Just do it Jess! This is for your girlfriend too."
"That's child abuse and I will call the hot line Uncle Luke."
"Are you kidding me?"
"No, I know to call for help, they care for me there, and the abuse will only get worse if I don't call and get help." Jess continued sarcastically.
"You're a real pain. I don't know how Rory deals with you."
"Well, it probably helps that I don't try and set her house on fire."
Luke ignored Jess and picked the plug up again. As he was about to try plugging it in again Jess stopped him.
"Just in case, Luke I want you to know, I'll miss you and thanks for everything."
Luke glared at him "ha ha ha" he muttered angrily.
Jess shrugged a smirk playing on his lips, "I just thought you should know" he continued.
Luke didn't reply and plugged the lights back in, and all the lights flashed on! And didn't blink! Luke's anger vanished as he grinned up at the lights.
Jess sighed again "thank god." And after he uttered those words the lights all went out again. Luke turned his glare toward Jess.
"What is wrong with you Jess?!" Luke snapped turning toward the teen. "Does your negative energy kill the Christmas lights?!"
"What are you talking about?" Jess demanded.
"The lights all went out when you touched them. And again when you spoke!"
"Oh the lights can hear me now?"
"Apparently they can sense your black soul!"
"Well sorry I'm not freaking Tiny Tim! And I can't control my evil Christmas light killing powers!"
"This is impossible!" Luke shouted unplugging the lights again and throwing the plug down onto the ground.
"Well maybe if you're girlfriend had Christmas lights from before the 1980s"
"Hey!" snapped Luke pointing a finger at Jess "they're your girlfriend's lights too!"
Jess rolled his eyes and picked up the discarded plug. Luke scoffed. Jess ignored him and plugged the lights in again. Again they all flashed on. They stayed on for a moment, not blinking or anything. Luke looked up at the house in amazement, but Jess stared at it suspiciously. And after a solid minute all the lights went dark again. Jess glared daggers at the house and instantly the lights turned back on. They stared at the house in silence. After two minutes had passed in silence and the lights seemed steady, Jess slowly opened his mouth to speak, eyes never leaving the house.
"Are we done?" he asked slowly and quietly. The pair stared at the house, as if waiting for it to answer. When the lights didn't turn off or start blinking they took that as a response. Luke slowly nodded and the two slowly moved away from the house.
"Finally!"
"You're done!" Rory exclaimed happily coming to stand next to Jess again in front of the house. Lorelai took her place next to Luke smiling sweetly up at him.
The four stood in front of the beautifully lit house for a moment before, all the lights went out.
"Oh no! What happened?" Rory exclaimed.
"Your house is evil" Jess explained calmly as he glared at the house.
"Our house is not evil" denied Lorelai. The lights turned back on. "See?" Lorelai said delighted. Then there was crackling sounds, more sparks flew, and all the light on the street went out. The group stood in the dark neighborhood as it began to snow.
"I'm getting you new Christmas lights" Luke said as he grabbed Lorelai's hand and pulled her toward his truck. "We'll be right back" he called to the teens as he opened Lorelai's car door and she hopped in with a grin on her face.
Rory and Jess watched the older couple drive away. Jess put his arm around Rory's waist and pulled her close. They shared a sweet kiss before they began their way to the dark house.
"So how are those cookies coming?" he asked with a smirk.
Rory blushed a little as she replied, "slowly, we're having issues with the oven."