Title: Someone
Author: Annaliesegrace
Rating: Whatever the lowest one is.
Disclaimer: I dont own them.
Summary: Quick one shot based on Adele's "Someone Like You."
AN: At the end this time.
I hate to turn up out of the blue, uninvited
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it
I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me, it isn't over
Never mind, I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you, too
Don't forget me, I begged, I remember you said
Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead
Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead
Adele, Someone Like You
The first time he saw her, he wasn't sure if he was seeing things. The odds were astronomical that in a city of X millions of people, he would stumble across Kensi Blye. After years away from LA, he had returned a mere six months ago. It was in the back of his head while he moved that she could be here, that she probably was here but again…the odds.
Clearly the odds were against him, because there she was, sitting on the beach in the pre-dawn light, her knees drawn up to her chest, staring out into the waves. Slowly he continued his path toward the beach, stopping just off to her right, maybe fifty yards behind her. And his heart clenched at seeing her again, even after all the years and all the heartache. For a brief moment he thought he was going to be sick, the crush of emotion upon seeing her almost too much.
He could just make out the ghost of a smile on her face, almost wistful. She was just as beautiful as he remembered. Dark hair hanging loose down her back, longer than he remembered, and sun-kissed with streaks of lighter brown through it; wearing dark wash jeans and a loose white t-shirt.
Sudden guilt flooded him and he resisted the urge to flee in the other direction and pretend he was never there. Seeing her had simply reminded him of what he had let go of, even if it wasn't completely within his control. Ending what they had had nearly killed him, she had been his rock. She had been everything to him.
Everything.
And he had left her because he had to, not because he wanted to, he could only hope that she knew that.
For a long while after the relationship ended he held out (delusional) hope that one day, after he straightened his head out, they could be together again; that they could repair the damage done. Eventually he realized that they couldn't, the damage that had been done was beyond anything they could repair. So he did his best to forget her, and he had been successful, until opportunity brought him back to Los Angeles and fate to this beach.
Watching her now as she continued to look out into the ocean, he wondered how life had turned out for her. Was she happy? Did she find someone else? And some demented part of him longed to know how badly he had hurt her, how long it took her to move on. Thiers was a relationship that was never easy, not at the start and certainly not at the end.
Because damn it, she was the best thing that ever happened to him.
But he was the worst thing that had ever happened to her.
And he knew that, and he accepted it.
So now he stood, watching her from afar, unsure what to do. Approach and start a conversation that was years too late? Or walk away? For some reason the urge to approach was winning despite is brain telling him it was a terrible idea, that he should leave her be and leave old wounds closed. But part of him wanted – no needed – to see her again up close, to touch her skin, talk to her. That was the part that desperately needed closure for himself. Because he could tell himself that she was fine, make up some world where she lived happily ever after with someone else but there was always part of him that would insist that wasn't true, that she had suffered at his hands and he needed to apologize for it.
Or maybe he was a selfish bastard and he needed make himself feel better.
The thoughts and feelings were rushing through him so fast he couldn't grab onto one idea long enough to put rational thought behind it.
But above all that, above the noises in his head and his heart pounding in his chest and blood rushing through his veins, he realized he just wanted to see her happy.
And if nothing else, he needed to make sure she was, if only for his own sanity. Besides, the odds had granted him the opportunity to talk to her, he might as well take advantage.
So he moved closer, pushing his feet into motion and he took five steps toward her and onto the beach when he finally realized that she was not sitting alone. Seated patiently on her other side was a mangy looking dog.
And then he realized she wasn't looking aimlessly into the ocean. She was watching someone.
A surfer came out of the water and headed straight towards her with a broad grin covering his face. As the man got closer, the dog jumped up and ran toward him, tail wagging furiously at what was obviously its owner. Kensi's smile broadened in a way he had never seen in his time with her, and she stood as well but didn't move, instead waiting for the shaggy blonde to approach.
After placing the surfboard soundly in the sand next to her, the other man suddenly wrapped his dripping wet arms around Kensi and pulled her into a bear hug against his equally soaked body and she squealed with laughter as he pulled her off her feet and turned them 180 degrees so she was now facing the sidewalk.
And Jack froze in fear at being noticed, which didn't last long as it quickly became obvious she only had eyes for the blonde. She looked at him with such love and adoration that a part of Jack's heart broke because that open love was not one they ever shared. It was clear that this man had opened her in ways Jack never could. Probably because most of their relationship consisted of her trying to help him through the PTSD, with him giving her nothing in return.
Suddenly she wrapped her arms around the blonde and gave him a deep kiss, which he returned. And suddenly Jack felt uncomfortable watching them, so he backtracked and walked away from the couple who were now walking hand in hand toward the parking lot, the dog following happily, barking at them.
While he'd hoped to talk to her at least, Jack was content with the idea that she had found someone better than him. Someone who brought out the best in her.
That gave him hope that maybe one day he would find someone like her.
The second time he saw her, Jack was seated at one of the finer restaurants in town, deep into a business dinner. It had been five months since the near run in at the beach. Five months of wondering.
And well, technically, he had seen him. The blonde.
The man had been standing in the waiting area; his shock of hair immediately caught Jacks attention even from halfway across the restaurant. He was standing with his hands in his pants pockets, bouncing on the balls of his feet, clearly waiting.
That's when she appeared to his left and the other man turned and smiled at her. This time the smile they shared was something deeper than the ones he had witnessed at the beach. A quick glance at her body, in a figure flattering black dress, gave away the reason.
She was pregnant.
Very pregnant.
Not that Jack was an expert in the subject, but he'd had plenty of friends who'd had kids, enough to know she was fairly close to the end.
And now a real rush of jealously flooded him, which he quickly tamped down with rationalism. Yes, Jack had promised her a family and the white picket fence and happily ever after, but he had been unable to deliver on any of the promises he had made to her. Not one.
His mind made up (he was not going to miss this opportunity as well), Jack excused himself from the table, standing and adjusting his tie as he strode across the restaurant, her in his sights.
As he made the last ten feet, she suddenly looked away from the blonde and at him, as if she knew he was coming, and she froze in place.
When he came to a complete stop in front of her, she stared at him as if he was a figment of her imagination (he certainly knew that feeling). The other man regarded him with thinly veiled concern and hostility. The blonde's hand even came up and crossed in front of her body pushing her slightly behind him in a protective gesture, which almost had Jack laughing, Kensi Blye never needed a man to protect her. Though he couldn't blame the other man, he had no idea who Jack was, just that a strange person had approached his pregnant girlfriend (wife?) and she'd reacted.
After what seemed like minutes, but was probably only seconds, Kensi breathed out, "Jack".
And the other man's armed dropped from its protective position – allowing her to move forward - but his blue eyes hardened with anger.
"Kens," the blonde started with a harsh tone, but she reached up and touched his bicep gently, which apparently was all the other man needed because instantly he relaxed his stance and merely glared.
"It's ok, Deeks," she said quietly and now Jack knew the other man's name. Deeks. Man, he hoped that was his last name.
Suddenly Jack realized he wasn't sure how to start this, and it must have showed because Kensi spoke again. "Jack Kelly, this is Marty Deeks. Deeks…Jack."
"Yeah, I got that," Deeks bit out and now her hand squeezed his arm.
Taking the high road, Jack held out a hand and smiled. "It's nice to meet you."
Deeks regarded Jack with such force that Jack nearly recoiled, but he maintained his neutral expression. Eventually Deeks pressed his hand into the other mans and quickly shook. Clearly he was still wary of Jack's presence, but was humoring him for now.
"I've heard a lot about you." The words were genial, but the tone was anything but. It was obvious Deeks was still unsure of Jacks sudden presence.
Upon first seeing the man at the beach, Jack assumed him to be a laid back, loose kinda guy. Obviously he had assumed wrong, if the expression Deeks face was still in was any indication. And suddenly the thought that the other man could do him harm briefly reared its head; behind those blue eyes was something hard and territorial.
And Kensi was clearly used to the behavior because she let out a long suffering sigh then muttered, "Deeks, knock it off."
"So…"
"So…"
Kensi and Jack started simultaneously then laughed.
Finally Jack indicated her protruding abdomen. "When are you due?"
She smiled and placed both hands on her belly. "Four weeks."
"Congratulations Kensi, really."
"Thanks."
Jack looked at the pair quickly and observed no rings. "Married?"
This time Deeks replied with a short, "No."
"We didn't see a reason to," Kensi continued and shrugged; Jack sensed this was a sensitive issue. She continued, "When did you get back to LA?"
"Almost a year ago, work brought me back."
She tilted her head. "What kind of work?"
"International security."
Now she smiled broadly. "That sounds like you."
"Been doing it for three years. I get to see the world on someone else's dime. Not a bad deal. You?"
"I'm an Agent with NCIS."
His eyes widened. "Now that sounds like you, Kensi. What office?"
Kensi and Deeks shared a look before she answered. "It's classified."
Confusion crossed his face before realization. Jack had been a Marine, he could read between the lines. "Both of you?"
"Yep." Deeks answered this time with a fond smile. And he could read between that line as well; they met at NCIS. And he was doubly impressed with Deeks, because the absolutely last think Jack would have pegged his as was a federal agent. And now the protective gesture made even more sense, if she was part of the elite group that frequently handled international issues and went undercover, Jack easily could have been someone out to harm her.
Quickly he glanced back to the table he had departed and noticed the other two men staring at him. "Could we get together one day? Talk?"
When she looked down at the floor, he had his answer. "I don't think that's a good idea."
While the words stung hard, he understood, she had moved on and talking to him would only cause more pain than it was worth to her.
"Ok, ok. It was good to see you Kensi.
She smiled at him. "It was good to see you too, Jack."
"I just…can I ask you one thing?"
"Sure."
"Are you happy? Really happy?"
Another broad smile crossed her face and she grabbed Deeks' hand. "Very."
Then he risked life and limb and leaned over, kissing her gently on the temple. "That's all I ever wanted."
"Jack…" her voice was impossibly quiet and for a second he thought he saw tears shimmering in her eyes. "I only ever wished the best for you."
And that's what he needed, release from his guilt and the fear he had done permanent damage to the woman he loved so much. A weight he hadn't realized he had been carrying around for five months suddenly lifted and he gave her a genuine smile.
"Goodbye, Kensi."
"Goodbye, Jack."
END
So there you have it, I hope you enjoyed; please review on the way out. It's been a rough couple weeks for me personally (which is why I haven't updated In Time) but this one was screaming in my head after I started listening to Adele over and over and over. This can be read as an "Insert" of sorts for "The Call" (events here happened in The Call, they just werent written), and if I ever get around to doing a fill in the blanks for that one, this one will probably be referenced.
Anyway, see you in the next one. And I highly recommend DLing "Someone Like You."