"I don't have the strength to keep figuring the both of us out!" Peeta snaps, he leaves me standing in the middle of his room deep underground in district 13.
You push me, I don't have the strength to resist or control you. Take me down take me down. You hurt me but do I deserve this? You make me so nervous, calm me down calm me down.
This is how it has been for months, I push him away he pushes back, a never ending cycle of unnecessary pain. I am afraid to let him love me after the hijacking. This fight happens in some way every day, tonight it came to an ugly head. I may have finally pushed the boy with the bread too far. He always comes back, tonight could be different. I pace the floor for hours giving him the space he needs. I've grown tired and curl into his bed, sleeping in a shirt belonging to him.
Dreams taunt me with the things I should have said and images of him walking away forever. I'm shaken from the ugly dreams when the soft pressure of his weight hits the bed. He wraps the covers tight around us and once again my Peeta has returned. His hand caresses my cheek, as my eyes fight trying to stay open.
"I'm sorry, I'll never walk away again" He says, I know that tomorrow will bring a million more chances for him to break this promise.
Wake you up in the middle of the night to say I will never walk away again, I'm never gonna leave this bed. So come here and never leave this place, perfection of your face slows me down, slows me down
"I'm sorry too, Peeta." I whisper my eyes flutter as his head rests against my own.
His lips kiss a soft trail across my neck and face, until I turn and match my lips with his. This is how it always is, he comes back I forgive him. I say I'm sorry, and we kiss. I'm too afraid to let it go any further. That alone has sparked other problems with the boy I am in love with. I've harbored love for him for a long time, and it scared me. He's said he loves me multiple times, I've always failed him and never returned the words. Tonight has to be different I have to say something to him. This fight was the worst, the next one will break us.
He kisses me a little harder and I wrap my arms around his neck pulling him on top of me. I'm wide awake now, full of anticipation and emotion.
So fall down, I need you to trust me. Go easy don't rush me. Help me out, why don't you help me out.
He lips tease along my neck and shoulders, I crave more of him than I ever have before, "Peeta." I whisper.
He thinks this is where I've drawn the line, he sighs and buried his head in my shoulder.
"Peeta, look at me." I whisper pulling his face close to mine.
My eyes flutter shut as I kiss him softly, and end the kiss with all the passion in my body. What I am about to say to him as erupted a thousand butterflies in my stomach, nervous tears prick my eyes. I'm letting down my last barrier, there will be nothing protecting me after I say it.
"I love you." I whisper staring deeply into his eyes, "I love you so much."
His eyes light up brightly even in the darkness that surrounds us, "Darling, I love you too."
He kisses away the tears I've shed from my emotional reverie, and holds tight to me. I hook my leg over his hip and pull him closer to me, our kisses become more passionate. I've laid it all on the line, given all of my trust to him. My mind says, go easy don't rush this, but I've lost all ability to think straight.
His hands run circles all over my body in the heat of the moment.
So you say go, no it isn't worth it and I say no it isn't perfect. So I'll stay and still, never gonna leave this bed. Take it, take it all take all that I have. I'd give it all away just to get you back.
His hands break away from my body to hurl his shirt off, the heat between us is too much. His body collides back with mine, pressing me harder into the mattress. Our limbs tangled and frenzied. My hands glide down his chest and hook into the band of his underwear. He smirks and pushes my hands away. His hands slide up my legs around my hips and softly strip the shirt from my body. I lay before his exposed and more alive than ever, as his hands slide up my stomach. His lips crash into mine again, overcome with the need for contact. We've denied this feeling for so long, it seems surreal.
Peeta kisses a trail across my bare chest and back across my cheek, leaving me wanting more. He stares me deep in the eyes, pure happiness dances in the blue eyes I love so much. His eyes ask a question, and without hesitation I whisper yes. I've given my heart to the boy with the bread, now I was ready to give him my body.
His hips writhe against my own eliciting new feelings and sparking a fire between us. The give and take of our hips continues, our hands never stop moving. It seems like hours until I feel his hands graze down my torso to the edge of my underwear. I nuzzle his shoulder begging him to continue. Before I can even register my own hands have removed the last of his clothing. His hands slide up my legs as his knees push my own apart. I'm closer to him then every before, our skin melting together.
I kiss him harder my mind reeling in the thought of what we are doing. Take it all, Peeta. It's all that I have to give you, and I hope that it is enough. I love him so much it hurts, and I deserve it for the hurt I've caused him. His eyes show no sign of those feelings, only the burden of the passion he's holding back. I tell him go easy, and I'm nervous. My body trembles as his lips leave searing kisses on my neck and collarbone. His eyes still say he sorry for leaving, long after I've looked past it.
Take it, take it all take all that I have. Take it, take it all take all that I have. Never gonna leave this bed.
Neither of us can stand it any longer, anticipation eating away at our trembling bodies. I can no longer resist him and I can tell he feels the same. I wrap my hands around his muscled back and kiss him deeply. All it takes is the slightest shift and we've finally started something that we've both wanted for so long.
You push me, I don't have the strength to resist or control you. Take me down take me down. You hurt me but do I deserve this? You make me so nervous, calm me down calm me down. Come here, and never leave this place. Perfection of your face slows me down, slows me down.
My mind loses all control with the sensations our bodies make together. His body rocks gently against my own, making me feel like I am flying. My hands scrape lines into his back as everything begins to feel more raw and needy. Peeta pulls my face to his and kisses me with more passion than I've ever felt before.
His head presses into crook of my neck and shoulder, ever gently biting when I least expect it. My name escapes his lips in deep groans, as his body moves with more need. Between deep gasps for air his name is all my lips can murmur, like they are telling my brain this is real. I feel my body roll and arch into his chest. I can't take the tension and anticipation any more. His hands, his body, his lips all have sent me into a frenzy. His eyes lock deep into my own and our bodies move frantically. He pulls my body tightly against his and I feel like I've been thrown off a cliff. The room disappears behind my fluttering eye lids and I begin to feel like I'm on fire.
Peeta's forehead rests against my own, my trembling hands pushing his sweaty hair back. Our lips are parted panting heavily, between soft kisses. Nothing needs to be said, we lay entwined just feeling and remembering. Peeta caresses my face, planting kisses every now and then.
"I love you." He whispers, as I curl into his arms and snuggle into the covers again.
"I love you, please don't leave again." I whisper, more tired than ever.
"Don't worry… I will never walk away. I'm never going to leave this bed as long as I share it with you."
Wake you up in the middle of the night to say I'll never walk away again. I'm never gonna leave this bed.