Pairing: DeanxSam

Genre: Slash, Angst, AU

Notes: Unbeta'ed. AU from the end of "On the head of a pin".

Finding my way back to you - Prologue

Castiel left the hospital room with feeling strange, not used to the mysterious feeling echoing in his soul, like it could grip his heart, if he had a human one. He walked trough the corridors, invisible once again, observing the sick people around him. After their little chat, Dean slept once again, drained by the revelations and the painkillers. The angel bit his bottom lip, still wondering why he had the desire to walk towards Dean and hug him. Maybe involve him with his wings, protecting this human from anymore harm.

This beautiful, beautiful human.

He went towards the exit when something caught his eyes. He stopped on his track, tracing his path back to the entrance of a small chapel, the only light coming from the candles from the altar. Sam's form was drawing shadows among the walls. Castiel approached cautiously, not knowing if he would be invisible to Sam now that he had such dangerous powers. A flare of anger lightened up inside him, making the angel want to grab Sam and shake him, demand why he was not beside his brother's when he arrived at the room.

He shook his head, trying to will away those feelings, approaching Sam even more. When he stood in front of him, his eyes widened.

Sam had his head bent low, whispering something, his hands clasped together, the knuckles resting against his forehead, eyes closed.

Sam was praying.

Castiel approached more, using his powers cautiously, trying to hear the prayer, curious as to why Sam was recurring to their father.

"Forgive me father for I have sinned. So many, many times."

The angel was surprised. He could hear tears in the human's voice.

"Since I'm little, all I know is Dean. Even if I ran away for better, he always was my everything. I had to bury the old Sam when he was gone, so I could stand being here without him. But now…" Castiel could hear the hitch on the boy's breathing. "Now all I seen to do is disappoint him. I want him to fight, I want him angry and getting back at Lilith, like I thought he would do. But he changed, just like I did, I guess. And it hurts me."

Sam stopped when the first sob broke loose. He wiped the tears with the back of his hand, but they kept coming.

"And I can't hate him for it, because I love him so much. So much more than a brother should." Sam hid his face between his hands. "I sin everyday, every time I feel this love inside of me but I can't stop it. I want him so much but I fear that this is gonna be the last straw that is gonna drive him away. I…don't know what to do."

Castiel lowered his hand against the boy's head, sending his peaceful energy towards him. Sam started crying fully now but the angel could see that the dark, anguished energy around him was clearing, little by little.

As he walked out of the hospital, minutes later, he made a decision. He just looked at the sky.

"Anna, I need your help."

As the female angel appeared before him, he told her about his plan. She just smiled kindly, touching his hand.

"It's difficult to see people in love hurting so much, isn't it? That's the beauty of the mankind. They love each other so deeply and still they are so afraid of this feeling."

Castiel nodded, agreeing.

"That's why we need to find a way of making them see. Without knowing we interfered, otherwise they won't believe it."

"I have an idea."

Blue eyes looked at her.

"Do you think this is gonna work?"

Anna smiled once more.

"If their love is strong enough, it will. If it doesn't…well, that will be for the better."

Castiel nodded. He thought that if only to take that hurt expression from Dean's face. To make him smile again.

But now, after the scene he witnessed, it was for Sam too. To never see him crying in that way again.

TBC