Jill was sound asleep, her breathing deep and even, the only noise that mattered in the silent room. Chris was watching her face, his fingers touching the bruises on her hips delicately as he tensed for that moment when pain would alter her features - but it never happened. They were sickly green and purple under the moonlight, the mottled skin feeling slightly swollen under his palm. She hadn't made a single noise of agony, the exact opposite in fact, so Chris hadn't realized what exactly he had done until they both collapsed in a slump of exhaustion. The disfigured skin matched perfectly with the shapes of his fingers, his breath catching in his throat until he pulled his gaze away. Only then could he finally breathe. A pang of regret assaulted his heart, his hand moving to her shoulder. Pressing gently, he rolled the still sleeping woman on her back and wrapped his arms around her, his face resting against her shoulder.
"Chris?" Her voice hummed sleepily, her unpinned hand moving to rest against the back of his head. His response was a heavy sigh, his shoulders drooping with sorrow. "What's the matter, honey?" She was still mostly asleep, her voice a light whisper against his ear.
"I hurt you.." He responded in a shaky breath, arms tightening around her as he confessed. She was silent, unable to comprehend what he was speaking of. After a moment, he pulled away, brushing the hair back from her beautiful face. Her eyes were blue orbs of confusion as they met his.
"What are you talking about?" Her voice was sharper, her expression no longer dreamy but suddenly stern. Chris' heart leapt to his throat as he trailed his eyes downwards to the sheet now covering her all but nude form, pulling the obstruction slowly downwards until what needed to be seen was revealed. Taking the hint, Jill too lowered her gaze, watching the progress of the fabric. Her eyes widened slightly at the sight of her discolored skin, Chris waiting with bated breath for her response.
"Oh!" Jill gasped then suddenly giggled, adding to Chris' confusion. He stared at her with a bewildered expression only making her laugh harder. "Chris, relax."
"How can I?" He protested with a whine, throwing his hands down on the bed. Jill giggled once more, and placed a hand against his cheek. His reaction was so typical. The man was so caught up in making sure he never hurt her, often treating her more like a glass sculpture rather than the woman she was. At times, the overbearing protectiveness was enough to make her snap at him, but now was not the time for that – not immediately after they had been intimate. Chris had so little confidence as it was; Jill didn't want to ruin what gained ground that lay behind them.
"You didn't do it on purpose, love," He looked up from the bed, his visage torn as the pad of her thumb swept across the top of his cheek bone. "It doesn't hurt at all." He relaxed visibly against her, nestling down against the side of her body and lowering his head back to her shoulder. Sometimes, that was all it took. One simple little phrase of reassurance and he was fine, accepting that she wasn't hurt. Other times, he would argue the point, unwilling to be so easily forgiven.
Jill blamed their lifestyles. They were both constantly at risk, one little mistake often leading to the deaths of the innocent, themselves, or their squad mates. Perfection was nearly impossible to achieve but it didn't stop Chris from trying to be that way for her.
"I love you," He murmured huskily against her neck, his breath tickling her skin. Earlier that evening they had fought over the pain they were both feeling, and when it had fallen into the passionate tangle of limbs that involved the breaking of furniture, the couple decided it was time to return to the bed. He was leaving for China soon; only a short three days remained before they would be separated again. Jill's arm gripped him tightly, sorrow threatening to swallow her up. He returned the squeeze with a sharp exhale, surprised by the strength in her thin arms. "Ow, Jill, you have one helluva grip."
"Shut up, Chris," She groaned in mock frustration, planting a slow kiss on his waiting lips. He released her only to push her back against the bed with his hands wrapped around her forearms, holding them firmly to the mattress above her head. His smile was dark with mischief as his eyes roamed over her bare form illuminated by the moonlight filtering through the window above the headboard, the woman wriggling against him as his hips found hers. He returned the teasing gesture with an arched brow, releasing her arms to place his hands at her hips – careful of the bruised flesh there.
"Let me memorize you," He murmured, low and seductive in her ear. She shivered and tilted her head when he bent to kiss her neck, trailing damp kisses to the edge of her collar bone. There was a familiar heat building in the pit of her stomach, her heart racing in her chest as his tongue teased one of her nipples. His hips continued their slow motions against hers, the agonizing pleasure threatening to tear her apart. His mouth switched to her other breast, a hand drifting up and down her side.
"I wish I didn't have to leave for China," He whispered against her shoulder, his arm snaking around the small of Jill's back. She gasped when she felt his hardening length against her thigh, "I'd rather stay here with you and never leave this bedroom." Jill turned her head and captured his mouth in a kiss as he shifted back to rest on his knees, his arm hauling her with him. "Lavish you with all the attention you deserve."
"Lavish, huh?" His partner positioned herself around his thighs, ankles hooking around his back, "When did you become such a romantic?" He didn't respond as he lifted her, the tip of his member riding against her dripping sex. She gasped her body bowing against the ripple of ecstasy that shivered through her.
"Right now, I just want to fuck you silly, Miss Valentine," His voice was rough in the dark room, strained with desire as she pushed herself forward to meet his hips.
But it wasn't fucking. It was slow and painfully sweet, each kiss full of affection and tainted by impending loneliness. They both knew there was a chance he wouldn't come back, as there always was, but this time was different. Jill's groans of pleasure sounded more like cries of grief, head thrown back as her arms wrapped around his bare shoulders. Chris had his face hidden against her shoulder, hands gripping her hips tightly. He had stopped thrusting into her with a sigh of relief and pain, holding her shivering body as she descended from her climax.
"Promise me you'll come back, Chris." Jill murmured against his hair, cheek resting against the top of his head. He was still lying between her legs, knees hitched up around his hips. He was quiet for a long time; the only noise in the room was the ticking of the clock above the bedroom door. It whittled away time, counted down those precious minutes they had left. He hated that clock.
"I promise…" His voice was hitched in his throat, strangely warped by uncertainty. Jill's arms tightened around him again.
When Jill opened her eyes, Chris was fast asleep. On her bedside table, a note was scribbled out in his rough penmanship, a box perched on the corner. She reached for it, reading the note again and again.
Jillybean,
This will keep you safe.
It will let everyone know you're mine.
He didn't sign it with his name, but that didn't matter. She set the paper on her lap and reached for the box, smile on her face. Leave it to Chris to propose with a note.