All Of Me
Summary: One-shot for episode 5x20. What happens after Kurt and Blaine fight and Kurt leaves Blaine standing at the piano?
"Too bad I can't believe anything else you say."
Kurt turned around on his heels with a huff and took long strides across the room.
Blaine felt shattered by Kurt's abrasive reaction, but he couldn't blame his fiancé. He had felt bad about the lie the moment it had come out of his mouth a couple of weeks ago and he had known that Kurt wouldn't take it lightly if he was to find out about it. For a second Blaine was angry with June for rejecting the idea of Kurt partaking in the showcase so persistently. For all her applaudable philosophy of life, Blaine couldn't understand why she thought it would be best for them to break up. Why couldn't she accept that Blaine loved Kurt and that being with Kurt didn't hamper his chances of becoming famous at all.
Blaine stared at the keys of the piano helplessly as if the answer was written on them. Here he was, just one moment ago pouring his heart out by singing All Of Me and the next the love of his life was running away from him. One thing he knew for sure, he wouldn't let June ruin his chances with Kurt.
After this moment of consideration, Blaine ran after Kurt. He knew he should probably leave him alone for a while, but Blaine couldn't stand suffering through the next few hours knowing how much he had hurt his fiancé. "Wait! Kurt, please wait!" he called out when he saw Kurt hurrying down the hallway. When Kurt wouldn't stop, Blaine sprinted across the hall, dodging fellow students on the way.
"Kurt, just wait for a second!" At the top of the staircase he caught Kurt's arm and tried to stop him. Kurt yanked his arm free and held up a hand in warning to stop Blaine from trying to touch him again. When Kurt looked at him, his face was a contorted mask of anger mixed with hurt.
"Let me explain," Blaine begged, holding up both hands in defense.
Kurt crossed his arms. "You've got one minute," he said, and there was an unmistakable hitch in his voice and his eyes were glistening with unshed tears.
For a second Blaine was too shocked to say anything. He hated seeing Kurt like this. Vulnerable, defeated, and so, so sad. It broke Blaine's heart to see Kurt miserable like this and even worse knowing he'd caused this.
"Time's running," Kurt tapped his watch when Blaine didn't speak up.
"Kurt," Blaine took a deep breath. "I just felt so, so bad when June took a liking to me instead of you and-"
"You didn't even know who she was!" Kurt cut in, shaking his head, incredulously.
"Right," Blaine nodded. "If it wasn't for you I wouldn't even have been singing at the opening of the dance studio. It was such an honor that you were chosen to sing for her and I'm so grateful you shared your spot with me. And now I feel like I took your place. I told June over and over again that she'd love you if she only got to know you."
"It's only the first impression that counts in this business, Blaine," Kurt said gruffly. "Obviously she fell in love with you at first sight. I can't blame her for that."
"I wanted you to be part of the showcase," Blaine stressed. "I did everything to make her see how great you are, but June keeps refusing and I don't know what to do anymore to change her mind about you."
Kurt shrugged in fake nonchalance. "So she hates me, no big deal. Nothing I can't handle. But that's still no reason for you to lie to me."
"No, I know," Blaine nodded in agreement and steepled his fingers in pleading. "There's no excuse for the lie. But you have to know how sincere I am about you. I don't care about anything but you. You know that, right?"
Kurt didn't answer but looked away, wiping at his eyes as tears threatened to fall.
"You just heard me singing All Of Me in there," Blaine said softly. "That was meant for you, not for the stupid showcase. I couldn't lay my heart into a song like that without a reason."
Kurt still didn't say anything, but Blaine suspected it was because he was trying not to cry. Blaine noticed the curious looks their fellow students gave them in bypassing and he extended his hand to Kurt. "Please, let's go back to the piano room and talk."
Blaine felt a great wave of relief wash over him when Kurt accepted his hand. Blaine held on tightly and entwined their fingers, clearly stating with the gesture that he wasn't going to let go of Kurt. His heart beat wildly in his chest when Kurt tightened his grip on Blaine's hand as well, like a promise that they belonged together, no matter what would come between them.
However, Blaine knew that he wasn't forgiven yet.
They walked back to the room quietly and closed the door. Blaine settled on the piano bench and made Kurt sit next to him, refusing to let go of Kurt's hand. Before he could start to explain further, however, Kurt spoke up.
"I know that you didn't want to hurt my feelings and that's why you lied to me," he said in a low voice, looking at Blaine from underneath his eyeslashes. "But don't you see that you just made me feel even worse about myself than I already did?"
Blaine shook his head no. He had no clue what Kurt was referring to.
"I had accepted that June preferred you over me," Kurt explained. "By now I'm used to standing in your shadow. But why did you have to get my hopes up? Why did you pretend that June was okay with me being in the showcase? Just to drop the bomb on me today and tell me how much you tried to convince her and how vigorously she refused to have me on board? Apparently she despises me so much that she wouldn't even have me to do you a favor, no matter how much you pleaded with her."
"She doesn't hate you. She just doesn't get you," Blaine tried to mend. "And you're not standing in my shadow. When I look at you all I see is sunshine, so bright it's blinding me."
A small smile formed on Kurt's lips. "That's so sweet and so cheesy of you to say."
"It's the truth, Kurt. You are crazy talented. Don't let someone like June Dolloway tell you otherwise. I didn't want to tell you all the stuff she said about you, because she's wrong!"
"But she's right about you," Kurt pointed out. "Maybe you're just blind to my flaws, because you love me. Maybe I'm not as talented as I thought I was."
"No, Kurt, no. God, I hate her for making you doubt yourself!"
"Look, I'm proud to be with you, Blaine. That's the truth. You inspire me every day. I meant what I said the other day about how I want to share everything with you and I don't regret asking you to sing with me for June. We're a team. At least I thought we were. That's why it hurts so much to feel left out. I know I pushed you towards her, but I didn't think you'd forget about me along the way."
"I never forgot about you," Blaine instantly said. "I just didn't want to hurt your feelings by bragging about my days."
"It's not just that you don't tell me stuff. You're not including me in the decision making process. You're not asking for my opinion on song choices or dance moves like you used to. You're not even asking me to help you pick out a suit for the showcase. I feel like I'm no use to you anymore."
Blaine gripped Kurt's hand harder. He could see the pain in his fiancés eyes and now that Kurt voiced his concerns Blaine didn't know how he could have been so blind not to see them.
"I hardly get to see you anymore," Kurt went on with tears welling up again. "She's taking you away from me and there's nothing I can do about it. I can't even complain, because she's got so much to offer to you. I don't want my pride to be the reason you don't take an opportunity like this. I don't want to stand in your way. I just can't believe that she's even going so far as to telling you to break off our engagement."
Blaine paled. "Who told you that?"
Kurt pouted. "Sam. He let a hint slip and I poked him until he told me all about it."
"Kurt, I'm so, so sorry, I never wanted you to know about this."
"I'm sorry I overreacted and hit the lunch bag off the piano." He gestured weakly over to where the bag still lay abandoned on the floor. "But I hate how she makes me feel about us, as if I'm not good for you. As if being with me is counterproductive for you. And then you go and stop talking to me about what you're doing when you're with her and you lie to me. I'm scared that I'm going to lose you to her idea of what kind of future lies ahead of you without me. I'm scared that you'll start to see her point and break up with me."
"Never!"
"Did it never occur to you that maybe she's right and we shouldn't get married?" Kurt asked.
"No, of course not!" Blaine was shocked. "June is so wrong to even suggest such a thing. I'd never leave you. You mean so much more to me than a possible career."
"In a way it makes sense, you know," Kurt said with a slight shrug. "People will react differently to you when you're single. In the beginning it'll all be about attraction. You have what it takes, Blaine, not just the talent but also the incredible looks. People will fall in love with you immediately. I don't want to weigh you down."
"Kurt, I need you more than I need fame," Blaine said, softening his voice. "People will have to get used to the fact that I'm in love with my beautiful fiancé. I don't care if they like it or not."
"This isn't just about you," Kurt said with another sigh. "You're amazing, Blaine. I always knew you'd be a great star one day. I believe in you. But I'm not going to make my life about cheering you on. I have my own career to work on."
"Of course you have," Blaine agreed. "That's what I told June! I told her that the world needs to see your talent, too!"
Kurt gave Blaine a sad smile. "Thank you. I know you'd do anything to support me. And we'll always belong to each other." He squeezed Blaine's hand. "But perhaps we shouldn't broadcast our love into the world."
Blaine stared at Kurt unbelievingly. "What do you mean?"
Without a word Kurt slowly lifted his left hand, displaying the ring. Blaine felt like all of his inside was freezing and he felt sick to his stomach.
Kurt tried to slip the ring off his finger, but he had worn it for such a long time that it was stuck.
"No," Blaine reached out to stop Kurt's efforts.
The ring came off. Kurt held it in his palm and looked down at it with a solemn and resolute expression.
"No, Kurt," Blaine said, slowly shaking his head. "Don't do this. I'm begging you."
Kurt tried to take Blaine's hand to give the ring to him, but Blaine tucked his hands firmly underneath his arm pits, refusing to take it back.
With an unhappy and pitiful look on his beautiful face, Kurt placed the ring on the top of the piano.
"You can give it back to me someday," Kurt said in a low voice. "If you'll still want me to have it."
"This is stupid, Kurt!" Blaine exclaimed, angry and desperate. "I'm not letting a bitter old lady tell me I couldn't be with you. If it was up to me I'd marry you today. You're all I need, Kurt!"
"You can't depend your happiness soley on me," Kurt replied softly. "I love you, Blaine. But maybe we shouldn't let our relationship get in the way of career opportunities. You can't tell June no. She's offering you this huge opportunity and—"
"You've just waited for this moment, haven't you?" Blaine asked, now fighting with tears of his own. "You've waited for a chance to call off the engagement! Do you think I haven't noticed? All this talk about enjoying a long engagement and— oh God, please don't do this."
"I'm not breaking up with you," Kurt clarified. "No way I'm going to do that. I want to be with you, Blaine, and someday I know we're going to be married and have everything we've dreamed of, everything we always talked about. I'm just saying that maybe June's right about this."
"Are you afraid that being engaged to me will corrupt your career chances? Because I can stand back. I don't need to pursue a career in the arts. I can do something completely different."
"Do you really think I want you to give up the stage for me? I told you I'm proud of what you do. I don't want you to change for me. You inspire me to work harder on myself. I want you to be as successful as you can be, because I won't hold back, either. I just hope that we'll manage not to lose one another along the way."
"I would have never agreed to even talk to June if I'd known it would lead to this," Blaine said with tears choking him. He picked up the engagement ring and held it out to Kurt. "You don't have to feel compelled to do this, Kurt. I will call off the showcase. I don't want it anymore. I'm serious. I can call June right now and tell her to mind her own damn business and leave me alone, Kurt, just please don't-" Blaine's voice broke and he hung his head as a sudden wave of misery washed over him. He captured Kurt's left hand and placed the ring in his palm, then he clutched Kurt's hand to his chest as if wanting him to feel his heart beat.
"It's all right, Blaine, it's okay," Kurt pulled him close with his free hand and tried to soothe him by rubbing his back and shoulders. "It was a stupid suggestion and I'm sorry."
Blaine buried his face into the crook of Kurt's neck and Kurt rested his cheek on top of Blaine's head.
For a moment neither of them spoke, they just enjoyed the comfort of being close to each other.
After a moment, Kurt's right hand reached out to play a simple melody on the keys. In an instant Blaine was spell-bound. He opened his eyes to watch Kurt's long slender fingers dance over the keys. Kurt played the piano well, but he didn't play it often. It wasn't a passion for him like it was for Blaine. Suddenly a realization struck Blaine. Didn't Kurt play in front of him, because he thought Blaine was better and he didn't want to be compared? It made Blaine sad to think that Kurt probably felt this way around him. He didn't want Kurt to feel inferior to him. He wanted them to be equals.
Then Blaine recognized the first few notes of I Have Nothing and melted away.
"I loved when you sang that song for me," he admitted in a quiet voice.
"I chose the song not just because it's one of Whitney's most challenging songs and I was obviously predestinated to sing it," Kurt said with a gentle smile.
"Obviously," Blaine agreed with a smile in return and lifted his head to meet Kurt's eyes. There was so much love and tenderness and sincerity in those blue eyes that Blaine was taken aback by the intensitiy of it.
"I chose to sing it to you, because I meant it," Kurt emphasized. "What is all the success in the world good for, if I didn't have you to share it with?"
"I feel the same way about you," Blaine replied eagerly. "There's something June Dolloway can't give me; no one else but you can give me."
Kurt chuckled. "Oh, I'm sure plenty of gay boys will glady give their all to you once you're famous."
"I'm not talking about sex," Blaine chided and pulled a face. "I don't want cheap sex with someone who worships me just because he's seen me sing on a stage. I want something real. You've been through everything with me, Kurt. You love me with all my flaws and mistakes and you'll continue loving me even if I end up a nobody, homeless in the streets with no money and fame." Blaine gave him a hopeful glance.
"True," Kurt confirmed with a grin. "Although I think we don't have to worry about your future in that regard."
Blaine let go of Kurt's hand and collected the ring out of its palm. Blaine climbed on the bench with one knee, hovering over Kurt and presenting the ring to him.
"Kurt Hummel, my one and only true love," he said with a solemn look on his face. "Do you accept this ring once more as symbol of my promise to love you eternally?"
Kurt let out a relieved sigh and a giggle. "Oh, just give me my ring back already!"
Blaine put the ring on Kurt's finger, then he framed his face with both hands and kissed him lovingly and decidedly.
They parted with a smacking sound and Kurt blinked up at him dreamily.
"I love when you kiss me like that."
"Like what?" Blaine asked squinting.
"Like the first time," Kurt smiled sheepishly and gave a shrug.
Blaine raised his hand to cup Kurt's cheek, stroking his thumb along the jaw line. "What are we going to do about the showcase?"
"Tell you what," Kurt said with a grin and rested his hands on Blaine's waist, hooking his thumbs into the waistline of his pants. "I'm going to sit in the audience, worshipping you like a crazy groupie and offering you cheap sex afterwards, because I'll be so blown away by your performance. And you'll return the favor the next time I'm going to be the star on a stage."
"Deal," Blaine grinned back, exhilarated by the mischiveous glint in Kurt's eyes. "But I promise you I'll think of something. I won't give in to June just like that. This showcase is about me and I wouldn't be a true diva if I didn't get my way one way or another."
"Uh," Kurt let out a low moan and tightened his grip on Blaine's waist. "This rebellious talk kind of turns me on."
"Really?" Blaine's grin spread across his face.
"Uhu," Kurt said, slipping his fingers into the back of Blaine's pants while Blaine was still towering over him. "Now kiss me like you want to take me right here on the piano."
"Whatever you want," Blaine grabbed Kurt's face again, meeting Kurt's open mouth with his own and kissing him deeply. Kurt craned his neck to return his kiss passionately while his hands got busy pulling Blaine's shirt out of his pants and grope at his exposed skin.
"I love you, Blaine," the urgency in Kurt's voice was contagious.
"I don't ever want to be without you, Kurt," Blaine murmured between kisses. The way he said Kurt's name was like begging him to get closer. Blaine sat back down, now straddling the bench and linking one leg across Kurt's lap, without breaking their kiss.
"Blaine, hold on," Kurt paused to take a breath. "If we go on like this, we either should be heading home real fast or I'm afraid we're actually going to have to misuse the piano and risk someone walking in on us."
They stared at each other with indecision for a second, then jumped up and ran for the door in a haste.
"We can catch the next subway if we hurry!"
"Screw the subway, I'll pay for a cab!"
"Wait up!" Blaine ran across the room to retrieve the abused lunch bag from the floor. "I always get hungry afterwards."
Kurt grabbed Blaine's hand to pull him along and speed things up. "We have two glorious hours before Rachel comes home."
"Mercedes' apartment is closer and she and Sam are out shopping today. I'll text Sam not to come home before eight at the very least."
"Perfect!" Kurt beamed. "What will you tell him why they can't come home?"
"We have a code," Blaine admitted with a grin.
"It's not 'Bros helping bros', is it?" Kurt joked.
"No, it's something along the lines of busy at the love shack."
Kurt laughed. "You can bet your sweet little butt that I'll keep you busy."
They pushed the doors open and stepped outside into the sunshine, still hand in hand while raising their free arms to hail a cab. Kurt even put two fingers in his mouth and whistled impatiently.
"Kurt," Blaine said and looked at his fiancé, absolutely love struck. "I so can't wait to get married and tell everyone that you're my husband. People will be so jealous that I'm the only one who gets to tap this."
Kurt turned his gaze into the sky as if considering Blaine's words. "True," he concluded with a grin, and then ran a finger down his body, singing, "Because all of me loves all of you."
Blaine laughed and playfully hit him with the lunch bag. "I sing you a song to express my undying love for you and you make fun of me!"
"You didn't actually sing it to me," Kurt pointed out. "I came in when you were almost finished, so it doesn't count."
"Okay, I'll make sure to get you an invitation next time I'm planning to serenade you and-"
"No, no, no!" Kurt waggled a finger at him. "Every time you sing to me it makes me want to join in, but I'm bound to sit and watch. So next time it's going to be a duet and something more upbeat and fun, you know? Something like, You'll be my American Boy," he sang.
Blaine grinned as an idea formed in his head. "Sounds about right!"
THE END
Thank you for reading!