AUTHORS NOTE: This story hit me while I was dancing to the song Mr Brightside by The Killers in the nightclub with my friends. As Emma says, stories really do hit you in the weirdest of places!!
DISCLAIMER: I'm not the owner of these delightful characters – unfortunately.
***
[Open Your Eyes]
***
He remembered the night that it happened. It had started out with a kiss. The pair had been drunk. It was surely understandable. They'd been chilling out in one of the new clubs after a gruelling case and he had laughed as she started to complain that they were too old for these kinds of places when she had watched a young girl walk in wearing minimal clothing. He had found his hand laced into the soft brown hair that had been so many different styles in the different times that he had known her and yet he couldn't pick a favourite, he had loved them all. He had loved them all on her.
He had watched as her eyelids had fluttered shut, her expression peaceful as she leant into him. They both had wanted it. They had both needed the other as their lips had met, their body leaning into be closer as their lips mated. It had gone on from there. They'd hailed a cab, kissed in the back seats before getting out at the nearest flat – his – and struggling to get through the front door because they couldn't keep their hands off each other. Their love making had been passionate, wild and that you'd expect of a drunken one night stand.
He'd woken up the next morning and had reached out for her, a lazy smile on his face as the first thought was that he'd finally managed to capture her. He had managed to capture the woman of his dreams without even telling her how he felt. The smile had frozen. He'd sat up and looked around him. The room was empty and there was no sign of her ever being there. He had just buried his face back in his pillow and sighed.
That had been three months ago. They had worked on together as if nothing had happened even though there was tension between the pair, neither of them commented on it. Burke noticed though. This had resulted in Robbie becoming Stuart's new full time partner and Jackie, Burke's. The two only then had to be together when they were in the group meetings debating who the subject was. They did no questioning together, no alibi checking together, no interrogations together, no nothing together. They didn't even go out to the bar after a case together! One of them always gave an excuse and it always her.
She had a partner now. A rich banker called Louis and Robbie hated him. Had Robbie met the guy? No. He just hated him. He presumed that he was some rich son of a bitch that thought that he could run the joint and seduce Robbie's Jackie with money and expensive dates. He could tell that Jackie was happier now and he had eavesdropped into her conversations with Stuart when they were in the kitchenette. He had always told himself to stop listening because it killed him inside. He couldn't.
It was thanks to the information he learnt at night from listening to her conversations with Stuart that he found himself lying awake at night, his mind just mentally processing images. He could see their bodies close together, his hands on her body. He'd watch as they fall down on the bed, his hands attacking at her clothes because he wanted to be with her and she wanted to be with him. He could see the way her back arched as he entered her, her nails digging into his shoulders. He thought back to the pleasure that he and Jackie had shared and felt his heart break at the mere idea that she could be sharing it with someone else.
Why hadn't someone opened his eyes earlier?
Why hadn't someone shaken him and told him that the most important thing in the world was standing right there in front of him and all he had to do was grab hold of it?
Why hadn't he been smart enough to notice it himself?
He sighed as he ran his hands through his scruffy hair and decided that tomorrow would be the day. Tomorrow would be when he finally faced his fears and told Jackie how he felt about her and there would be no chickening out. Well there might be, he decided but he'd fight so damn hard to ignore the panic when he arrived.
***
He had gone all day without talking to her. They had ignored each other like their usual pattern had become but he had noticed that Jackie was more withdrawn than normal. He sighed with nerves when Burke said that they were free to go but they had to be back early in the morning. "Can I speak to you, Jackie?" She froze and turned to look at him.
"Of course you can, Robbie." She said sarcastically and he found himself wanting to ask what the hell her problem was but decided that probably wouldn't help his approach so he just smiled at her and ignore the bitchiness.
"Thank you, Jackie." He said in a short tone before looking at her. He knew that Stuart was staring at them but he realised that having Stuart there could work in his favour. She was less likely to take it as a joke if he said it in front of someone, right? "Jackie, why did you run out on me all those weeks ago?" She had gone back to tidying her desk after his short reply and once again, he watched her freeze and he knew she was thinking up an answer.
"I didn't want to wake up beside you and have to listen to the same short changed excuses that you give all your other bimbos, Robbie. I'm better than that. I'm obviously still stupid enough to fall into your bed after a drink or two but I'm not desperate for you to tell me that you're "not in a good place right now"." And by god, she actually used her fingers to air quote him as if she thought he had actually ever said that to a woman. He stared at her for a second before saying,
"What?"
"You know exactly what I mean, Robbie. You didn't mean for us to end up in bed there was too much drink between us and..." She didn't have chance to finish her sentence because Robbie interrupted her.
"I love you!" He said in exasperation staring at him and then he watched as her face started to crumble.
"You know I had always thought you were a prick but to listen to one of mine and Stuart's conversations and then use that against me is harsh!" She said through her tears before excusing herself and leaving. Robbie stared after her speechless before turning to look at Stuart.
"You know that totally had a definitely had a different outcome in my head." He pointed out causing Stuart to sigh as he moved over and realised that Robbie hadn't actually been listening into the conversation that the pair had been sharing earlier because he knew Robbie wasn't that heartless. He was a prick like she had pointed out but not a heartless one. He rested a hand on Robbie's shoulder before shaking his head.
"It was simply bad timing." He looked over at the door where Jackie had just exited before deciding that he could break her confidence every once in a while. "Louis finished her last night with the excuse that she wasn't loveable material hence why she got upset when you said you loved her because to be fair, that would be pretty good revenge for what she did to you."
"I don't want revenge for what she did to me! She didn't do anything to me! I can understand her fear! I am a prick!" He realised at the end and looked at Stuart before sighing. "Wow. We're a bonny pair."
"You know what I was just thinking that and do you know what else I was thinking."
"What?" Robbie asked in a bored tone of voice as he realised that he didn't have a back up plan. Jackie had simply burnt him out and that was the end of the conversation.
"Why you are still sat here moping with me when you could have ran after her and demanded that she speak to you about this?" Robbie turned his attention to Stuart then, his lips pursed as he realised that the man sat in front of him had a point. He should have chased after her and demanded to know what she was talking about, he should have demanded that she listen to him and more importantly, should have demanded that she gave him a chance.
"Stuart, would you get the wrong impression if I kissed you right now?"
"No but I'd kick your arse for wasting time kissing me rather than running after her!" He practically shouted pushing at Robbie so that he would leave.
***
Thankfully had a long time tradition of stopping at the coffeehouse for something to drink before going home and Robbie managed to catch up with her. She looked at him and rolled her eyes before starting to walk towards a table deciding that attempting to walk past him would fail. "I suppose you've come to finish your ridiculous conversation with me." He sat down across from her and saw that her eyes were red. She'd been crying.
"I do want to finish that conversation but I also want you to realise that I didn't say anything spitefully, Jackie! I said it because I actually love you! I thought I finally had you that night when we were drunk at the bar but you disappeared and then was cold with me..."
"I thought being cold with you would make me move on quicker. It just hurt much more." She explained without him even asking her to. He smiled as he reached over and held her hand.
"I thought that night, I had everything I wanted and I wouldn't ever have to say the one thing I'm afraid to tell you." He saw the confusion in her face and he took hold of her hand. "Louis is the prick in this situation, Jackie. He told you that you were unlovable but I can tell you that's bullshit because I love you."
"What?" She said again and he just laughed.
"I love you, Jackie. I always have and I always will even if you walk out of my bedroom again in the middle of night with no explanation, I will always love you and beg for you to forgive me. I am a prick and I realise that but it's not going to change how I feel about you. Why are you shaking your head?"
"You might be a prick, Robbie." She whispered and he glowered at her wanting to say thanks for making him feel good about himself but she just laughed, "but you're my prick."
She leant over on the table and pressed her lips to his. Robbie smiled against her lips as he realised that he had needed Stuart all along to be the one to open his eyes as well as Jackie and then maybe just a little bit of a push from himself. He'd never have to imagine her dress being taken off by another man now, he thought as he stroked his hand through her brown hair. He pulled away from the kiss and looked at her.
"What's wrong?" She asked.
"I just wanted to make if perfectly clear that I don't find the term prick a friendly pet name so..." She just laughed as she kissed him again. Oh how she loved him.