AN: Between work and cracking my head over deciding which university course to take, I managed to squeeze this one-shot out. Still not that great, probably has about as much substance as my last one-shot. Which makes this, uh, dark fluff? frowns 'Scuse the rambling. Anyway, enjoy. And review. And forgive any errors.
From the corner of his eye, Kenshin could see the way her eyes widened as she was splattered with blood.
He knew that he should not have allowed himself to be distracted by her. The situation at hand still wasn't completely settled, after all. But, as always, she had a way of commanding every bit of his attention, stealing it away from everything else that should have mattered. Even when she didn't mean to.
He watched as a whole series of emotions played out in her sapphire orbs. First, they glazed over with shock. And then horror, and disgust. Her already fair skin had gone even paler, and she looked like she was resisting the urge to vomit.
It bothered him to see her so shaken, so disturbed. The realization that it was his fault upset him even more. But he'd deal with that in a moment.
He turned his focus back to the man in front of him. His assailant had dropped his sword, and his arms wrapped around his stomach, as if trying to stem the blood gushing from his belly. Well, Kenshin observed dispassionately, it sure didn't seem to be working.
The man gave Kenshin one last, hate-filled glare, then his eyes rolled back in his head. He crumpled to the ground, blood still pouring from the slash Kenshin had made in his midsection. He twitched for a moment, and then went limp. If he wasn't dead yet, he would bleed to death soon enough. Kenshin turned back to face the woman standing next to him.
Kaoru's face was contorted as she attempted to suppress a sickened expression. Her eyes were fixed on the assassin that he'd just killed. He frowned when he saw that her face, her clothes, were peppered with droplets of red.
With blood. The realization finally sunk in. Oh, kami, no, she's covered with blood!
His eyes frantically assessed his beloved, becoming increasingly horrified with every speck of blood his spotted. Even in the near darkness of the night, the stains glowed far too clearly. She was covered with blood. This shouldn't have happened. This was never supposed to happen…
"Kenshin? Kenshin, are you alright?" Kaoru's voice, high-pitched with fright, cut through his thoughts. He looked up, startled.
"I'm fine." Instinctively, he reached a hand out towards her. "How about you?"
"I'm okay –" Her reply was cut off as her eyes abruptly went wide again. To his surprise, she hurriedly shrank away from his touch. Her expression was one of apparent fear.
Something stabbed into Kenshin's heart and twisted.
It must have shown on his face, because Kaoru immediately flushed red and muttered, "Gomen. But…your sword…"
Mutely, Kenshin glanced at the hand he had stretched out towards Kaoru.
He was still holding his dripping katana, he noticed with detached surprise. Blood had splashed onto his hands as well. He stared at his weapon, for a moment at a loss as to what to do with it.
He couldn't sheathe it, so he set in down on the road. But there was still the matter of his stained hands. He thought for a moment, and then removed his T-shirt.
"Kenshin!" He heard Kaoru cry out in alarm. "What do you think you're doing?" He felt a flicker of grim amusement as he detected a hint of embarrassment in her voice. Even in such a situation, she could still be so demure. He let his shirt soak up most of the blood on his hands, taking care to dirty only a small corner of it. Then, tentatively, reaching out with a clean end of the shirt, he moved towards Kaoru once more.
This time, she did not flinch, but shook her head.
"I can get cleaned up later," she said. Her expression, though, betrayed her distaste at having to remain in her current state. Her eyes scanned the alley, searching around and above them as she spoke, as if fearing that something else might jump out of the shadows of the night to attack them. "We should probably get out of here now. More of them could be around here."
It was a prudent suggestion, but Kenshin felt a powerful, irrational reluctance to leave the scene. Not while she was still..."Just let me get the blood of you," he muttered. "Please." He couldn't quite keep out the pleading tone from his voice.
She apparently heard it too. Kaoru's eyes regarded him, her expression a mix of suspicion and worry. He tried to meet her gaze as calmly as possibly. She didn't need to be worried about his state of mind right now. But his eyes kept straying towards a crimson droplet on her chin. It was large, and threatened to drip to the ground, but somehow managed to stubbornly cling onto her skin.
His hands itched to swipe it from her face, to remove any trace of it ever having been there. It shouldn't be there. It should never have dared to mar her.
Finally, Kaoru let out a sigh. "Fine."
Without hesitation, Kenshin began to clean the blood from her face. The tightness in his chest began to fade as the blood began to disappear from her face. It bothered him though, that there was nothing he could do about her clothes, which were stained as well. Maybe he could persuade her to leave the sweater behind.
As he went about his task, he whispered an apology, and she forced a brave smile in response. "It's alright," she replied. "My fault for not getting away in time. If you hadn't…acted when you did, I would have…" She trailed off again, without completing the thought, to his relief. It was a possibility he could not bear to consider. "It's alright," she repeated instead.
But it wasn't. How could it be alright? It was bad enough that he had tainted his own self with blood...
They were both silent as he worked, as quickly as he could without betraying the frantic need he felt. Soon he was almost done, but except for a trace of red on her cheek. He ran the cloth over it. It faded, but did not quite disappear. He could still make out a hint of red.
Panic began to well up inside him and he rubbed at it again, more forcefully this time.
"Kenshin!" Surprised, Kaoru laid her hand over his, the one that held his shirt, halting his motions. "That hurt!"
"Sorry," Kenshin muttered. He stopped, but his eyes were still fixated on the spot on the cheek. The smudged bloodstain still remained, still clearly visible to his eyes. It stood out starkly against the pale hue of Kaoru's skin, even in the dim lighting of the alley, as if mocking all his efforts to remove it. He resisted the urge to scrub at it once more. "But – it won't come off…"
His voice had risen in pitch, and he could not prevent his tone from betraying the desperation that he felt. It had to come off, now. She shouldn't – couldn't – be stained. Not her.
But the infuriating smudge remained on her cheek, a cruel reminder. It was his fault. This was all his fault. And he couldn't erase it.
"Kenshin." When he only continued to stare at her cheek, she called him again, her voice more forceful this time. "Kenshin. It's alright. Leave it. Let's just go." She began to pry his hand away from her cheek.
At that moment, something inside Kenshin snapped.
"It's not!" He burst out suddenly, surprising her. Before he could stop himself, the words rushed out of his mouth. "It's not alright! I – I got you stained too. You're not supposed to – not you too – it's my fault –"
He stopped. Burning with shame, he directed his gaze to the ground. He didn't deserve it, but he suddenly, powerfully, he wanted, needed her to see. To comprehend the magnitude of his sin, and his guilt for what he had done to her. But the words would not come.
The long, awful moments of deafening silence seemed to stretch forever. Kenshin kept his eyes fixed on the road.
I'm sorry. I'm so sorry…
"Kenshin."
He finally looked up to meet her gaze. He did not know what she saw in his eyes, but it evidently pained her, and in turn pained him as well. Her expression did not change, but it became suffused with a subtle sadness.
She gripped his hand, the one that was wiping her cheek. "Kenshin," she repeated again, her voice more gentle this time. Her eyes gazed imploringly into his. "It's alright."
When he didn't react, she paused for a moment, considering. Then, she hesitatingly, she licked one of her fingers, which were free of blood, and then ran it across her cheek, where the blood stain was. The smudge came off on her moistened finger, which she wiped clean on his shirt. Almost as an afterthought, she removed her bloodied sweater.
"Better?"
"Better," he echoed. She was virtually free of blood now. He felt an immense sense of relief at that. Now that he couldn't see it, it was a little less horrible.
She smiled, a small sad quirk of her lips, and then took his shirt from him. "Let me have that for a moment."
He did not protest as she began to clean the blood of him. Somehow, he sensed that she, too, needed to do this, almost as much as he had.
She wiped his face first, then his hands. Occasionally, shyly at first but with increasing ease, she would pause to wet a finger with her mouth and rub it against his skin, taking the blood on him onto her hands, before wiping her finger clean. It should have seemed wrong, but…He relished her cleansing touch, and a sort of peace came over him.
"You know," he heard her whisper as she labored, almost as if to herself, "if I had my way, you'd never have any blood on you either."
As he had often done, Kenshin wondered what gods could have been so benevolent so as to have blessed him with Kaoru, yet were cruel enough to doom her to a life with him.
When she was finished, she dropped the soiled shirt, and then took his hand. "Come on," she said, in that same, soothing tone. "Let's get out of here." He nodded.
He went to retrieve his katana, wiping it on the discarded shirt before sheathing it. He took Kaoru's hand once more before leading her away from the alley.
As they ran, Kenshin sneaked a last glance at his free hand. She'd done a good job of removing all traces of blood from it, as with his other hand. He stuck it into his pocket.
They still felt sticky, though.