Disclaimer: I do not own YGO 5Ds, this is a non-profit work of fiction.

A/N: The story of an adult(?) in a teenager's body, struggling to survive through everything that is fundamentally wrong with the Satellite and the 5D's world in general, trying to bring reason and logic into this anime.

I've always felt YuGiOh 5Ds had a lot of common-sense loopholes. Like how did three teenagers build half a bridge? If Sector Security could force the duel runners into a duel, why don't they just force the same runners to stop? And why was no other global powers interested in Momentum? The machine producing limitless energy and capable of massive destruction (think enhanced nuclear weapons). So I thought I'd have a little fun with this world.

Featuring lives of average Satellite residents, and adult themes such as employment, the importance of infrastructure to an emerging economy, and where food comes from. :P

Starts roughly 6 months before Fortune Cup. I will be using English rather than Japanese names. Contains references to the Abridged series because I can't resist.

Duels: No XYZ/Pendulum summons. Real cards only, except anime cards for their respective owners. I'm following the ban list in the Arc V-Tag Force game, which is the TGC July 2014 list. 4000LP, first turn draw. If you see any bugs with the duels or the rest of the story, please let me know.

***Spoiler, sort of. This is technically the full summary but it does contain a bit of spoiler for Chapter 17***

Complete Summary:

When Chance alone determines the hero's success or failure, when Fate rests on the draw of a single card, the world splits into two, one of light and one of darkness; one of victory, one of loss. Thus was the laws of this universe, something not even the Crimson Dragon could change.

Then things got worse.

The unstable Shadow Dimensions would inevitably invaded the Light, and when all four dimensions collided, matter would be no more.

Desperate to prevent the imminent destruction of the future of this dimension, the Crimson Dragon summoned a being from a higher plane, a being capable of defying Fate, a being on par with the Dragon's God.

Unfortunately, it got me.

A reasonable, pragmatic adult now stuck in a teenager's body, struggling to survive through everything that is fundamentally wrong with the Satellite and the 5D's world in general. Why do your police officers carry a gaming device? How do you shower if you live in a subway tunnel? And where can I get some chocolate in this dump?

Priorities: Food, water, laptop, WiFi; not necessarily in that order. Oh, and saving the world, right, probably.

...

So yeah. That's going to be part of the story. Basically saving the world, and creating a world worth saving, wreaking boundless havoc (no, no, we didn't just kill Kalin, but we did kidnap Crow, that's on me) and facing unspeakable terrors (what do you mean you don't have any conditioner?)in the process.

I'm really happy that I have finally gotten far enough in the story that I can post the complete summary here. Wasn't sure if I'd even get this far.

***End of Sort of Spoiler, Hope You Enjoy***

You know things are bad when you wake up in a universe involving repeated near-misses of destruction of the world, and your chief concern isn't the destruction of the world.

That's how I found myself waking up in the street at the heart of the Satellite of Domino City, trapped in the body of a 13-year-old girl. I guess there's an upside to this, I can't imagine my real body being otherwise intact in the real world (yes, I'm calling that world the real world). But, let's, let's not dwell on that, I shuddered at the memory of the crash and pushed it out of my mind.

I had inherited some memories, and little else, from the former occupant of this body, so I wasn't irrationally terrified about being somewhere entirely new - I knew exactly where I was- which was rational cause for terror.

You see, there were some details regarding the Satellite the anime conveniently forgot to mention.

Just the little things like its post-apocalyptic wasteland state, the utter absence of health care, education and infrastructure. Technically there is a police force, though the only role of Sector Security is guarding the Domino factories and keeping the satellites in the Satellite. Not surprisingly, there isn't an adequate social welfare system in the Satellite, Neo Dominos do provide rations, yes, rations, for minors, just enough to keep them alive. Shelter, clothing and other necessities not included.

The previous tenant of this body, best I can tell, had succumbed to illness and chronic malnutrition, which is why I found myself in one corner of an elaborate bomb shelter from WWIV, on a well-worn plastic table top that obviously served as a bed, hugging my knees, rocking back and forth, shivering from the cold, fear and grief.

The entire place smelt like mold and cat piss. Or as I later found out, it wasn't cat urine. A recent rainstorm did not cleanse the air in these shelters, rather it washed all the filth of the Satellite into these tunnels now doubling as sewers. I didn't dare venture into the shadows, for fear of finding humans, as well as their remnants and excrement. There was no lighting except for scattered sunlight cast through sewage grates in the ceiling of my new abode, which, in the absence of any electronics that I could see, was the source of heat and innumerable dangers in my current residence.

Looking through the gap in the grate from my position, I could just get a glimpse of the Kaiba Dome- how fitting that only a corporate symbol should be all that remains of a better time.

Eventually, even the heat subsided, as the sunlight dimmed and cast longer shadows over my still form. Pangs of hunger eventually prompted me get out of fetal position on the piece of plastic I was using as a bed, and crawl out of my hideout like a common sewer rat, under the guise of dusk in hopes of find scraps. Shielding my eyes from the sudden light, I looked out to either ends of the barren streets, with rows of abandoned houses on either end. I grimaced.

...

It took one look at the outside world for me to lose hope- you can learn a lot about a place just from the first glance, if you know what to look for.

Having a large number of abandoned houses while a significant percentage of the population still chose to live underground, adjacent to aforementioned housing, suggest poor security in this neighborhood. Cracked but still technically functional petroleum roads, despite having had no maintenance in the past 2 decades, suggest moderate climates and lack of motorized vehicles (which are heavier and thus creates more damage). The absence of even weeds on the ground is indicative of soil pollution levels.

Taken all together, maybe not the best neighborhood (unless it really was the best neighborhood in the Satellite, in which case I stand corrected).

I stared wistfully at my reflection in a pothole that was large enough to display my entire body, in all its neon-green-hair glory. Not the bluish-green 4Kids had considered a real hair color, no, this was Season 0 Seto Kaiba green, paired with eyes of the same color- with the right clothes, I'd look radioactive. An anemic teenager stared back at me from the water, displaying the scrawny pre-pubescent body of Season 1 Ryou Bakura, and Yugi Motou's height. On the plus side, that's like three main-character traits, though Ryou really shouldn't count. I stepped closer to the edge of the hole, stretching my neck over the edge to examine the boyish haircut that was obviously trimmed with convenience rather than appearance in mind, and the eyes that shone with despair.

...

"Hey, kid, you alright?" The approach of an older man interrupted me from my reverie, I say older, he was in his early twenties, the best I could tell. I struggled to study the man who just emerged from a dark alley and was standing against the setting sun. Greyish hair covering half his face obscured most of his features, a long black leather jacket covered most of his gaunt form despite the warm spring weather, a deliberate effort to stand against the light. This was no doubt a loner, as uncomfortable with the world as the world was with him. The only distinguishing mark was the geometric red marks on his face and the glistening duel disk attached to his left arm; I could see several deck holders on his belt. In the Satellite, that's as well off as you can get.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I nodded firmly. I regarded him with the caution an adult knows a teenage girl should have when faced with an older man in the shadier parts of town.

"Are you sure?" Seeing my alarm, he took a couple of steps back, I visibly relaxed.

"As fine as I can be in this messed up place." I sighed deeply, taking a breath of slightly fresher air than the dank underground shelter, "With no food, water or any chance of things getting better unless I do something about it." I desperately needed to vent.

"Couldn't have said it better myself," he smiled, a tired and twisted smile, not altogether unfriendly. Though in contrast, even my old pre-exam nervous-breakdown laughter would have seemed genuinely cheerful by comparison. "But you be careful kid, nobody's satisfied with things in the Satellite, and nobody has the guts to change anything," His quiet laughter reminded me of a YouTube video I saw of the wounded hyena being eaten alive by leopards, "and they would stab you in the back if you tried."

This laughing lunatic fits so well with the whole post-apocalypse theme I almost laughed with him. Maybe it's the shock of this world, or the ease of opening up to strangers, I offered half-jokingly, "either I change the world or I die trying, 'cause I sure as hell can't live in a place like this."

"There're easier options," he said dismissively, there was something in his voice that I couldn't quite name.

"There really isn't," I rejected the idea outright.

My alternatives were to survive in the Satellite like this, or trick Rex Goodwin into letting me into Domino (without leading to global destruction). I didn't think I'd manage either.

"Whatever your choice in the Satellite, you'll die very quickly. The only difference is when you're buried." I'll be honest, this is not mine, it's a quote I read somewhere*. Not that he would know that, since most of the historical data before the 3rd World War has been lost.

He smiled again, a little wider this time. It really just looked like he was straining to pull up the corners of his lips to show as much teeth as he could. "Here," He threw something my way, I quickly dodged. A single duel monster card flew past me and landed on the dented cement.

"You're a jumpy one, aren't you?" He turned to walk away, "I heard that card was part of a great deck once, maybe you can get it back together."

He retreated back into one of the countless alleyways in the Satellite without further ado.

Had my thoughts not been clouded by hunger and resentment at this world, I might have recognized the conclusion of my first meeting with the ex-leader of the Enforcers- with me thinking he was a weird recluse, and him thinking he had just prevented me from killing myself. As it was, both parties returned back to their daily lives without a second thought.

...

Duel monster cards were more reliable than currency here, so I guess this was the modern (hah! modern!) equivalent of handing a homeless kid a twenty. Not much in and of itself, but very fortunate when you consider the income of your average Old Domino Dwellers. Maybe I can trade it for a meal.

I pulled my sleeves over my fingers to pick up the card, it was a trap card, Dimensional Prison, a staple in many decks, even in my reality several series after Synchro summoning. Only the name and the image were displayed, as was typical of duel monster cards in this world. Surely he didn't know the value of this card, or are trading card more affordable in this world than I presumed?

I wandered aimlessly for about an hour more, not daring to venture too far into the unknown for fear of getting lost and losing even my humble shelter. I retreated back underground like a rat. Sitting down on the cheap plastic table top that doubled as a bed, I sulked, I mean pondered the fate of this world, while moaning over hunger pains.

While having gained nothing but a duel monster's card, I was arguably lucky that time, had I met anybody who wanted me harm, I might be dead right now or worse.

I can't survive like this, I really can't. I didn't grow up pampered, but I did get accustomed to a standard of living above the poverty line, back when I didn't have to worry about death by starvation or hypothermia. I licked my lips anxiously, tasting blood from the cracked skin, and hungrily licked it off. I had little advantage, except my knowledge of the plot, aka destiny. That's got to come in handy, right? Hunger had already gotten the better of me. I sincerely debated going to Rex Goodwin. Evil manipulative asshole that he is, he would surely see the significance of whatever I chose to reveal to him. I kept that idea on the back burner and licked my lips again.

The only realistic approach to social mobility as everybody here seems to sincerely, unironically believe, is a trading card game.

Dueling though, might present a problem. I don't ride motorcycles. I can barely drive. I forgot how to parallel park the day I got my license, and have serious trouble backing into a parking space between two cars, and I always get nervous getting on and off the highway. The point being, I can't possibly duel on a motorbike going 200 miles/hr, or indeed any motorbike unless it was standing completely still. This entire world is based on the ridiculous notion of card games on motorcycles, an idea they had no doubt worked miracles with, but nothing can disguise the absurdity of the initial idea; I mean come on, card games on motorcycles, really?

More fundamentally. dueling was not a life-altering miracle as Satellite residents seem to believe. Yusei was an excellent duelist before the plot started, yet it took the Crimson Dragon for him to get an opportunity to improve his situation. Similarly, Jack Atlas did not get to Domino City via his dueling talents, he got there because he was a Signer.

There are, however, other ways. If you know the strengths and weaknesses of each major player in this upcoming debacle of a world domination attempt. In the growing darkness, I plotted silently. I can't live like this. For better or for worse, I will escape the Satellite

A/N:

*the original quote "Some people die at 25 and aren't buried until 75" is by Benjamin Franklin

That's it for the first chapter, please read and review, all feedback are welcome.