"No."
"What? Why not?"
"Never in a million years."
"What's wrong with it?"
"I am never calling my child by that name."
"Why not?"
"Don't you think it's a little intense?"
"No. Think about it Shrimp, who'd want to beat up a kid named after a badass dragon? Metalicanna Redfox, I think it has a great ring to it."
Levy gave her husband a look that could curdle milk. "No."
"Well, you got any other ideas?"
"Yes, and that's why the hat is filled with all of those little pieces of folded paper."
Gajeel plucked another slip from the fedora stationed on the coffee table while he sat cross-legged on the floor, leaning on the coffee table in boredom. Levy sat on the couch, one hand gently stroking her over-sized baby-bump.
"Shrimp, I can't even pronounce this one." He said as he held up the little piece of parchment. Levy squinted at her handwriting for a second before recognizing what it was.
"It's pronounced Ah-rail-lee-uh. It means gold in Latin."
"Nah, too hard to say. I do appreciate the metal reference though," he said as he pointed at her with a raised eyebrow. "Your turn Lev."
Levy struggled a bit to lean over and grab another folded paper strip.
"Pa- are you serious right now?- Pantherlily? You want to name our child Pantherlily?"
"Yeah, who'd want to mess with a kid with a name like that? Named after a badass cat."
Levy sighed, "Do you have any ideas that do not include naming our child after "badass" individuals in your life? Not to mention, we're having a girl, Gajeel. A GIRL."
"Hmmm." Gajeel pondered. "What if we just shortened it to Lilly then?"
The blue-haired script mage face-palmed in frustration. "Just pick another one." She said.
The Iron Dragon Slayer reached into the hat and pulled out a gently folded scrap of notebook paper. It was slightly larger than the rest, and the paper didn't match the kind Levy had so painstakingly trimmed to perfection. He opened it and began to read its contents.
'You should name your baby Haruka because it means spring and my name means summer and I get to be the godfather right? So I get to help pick the name right? Also, it has the same first two letters as Happy's name so its perfect. No need to thank me, just make me her godfather because that is such a cool name.'
Gajeel dropped his head to the table's surface and shook it back and forth.
"What's it say?" Levy inquired. Gajeel handed her the scrap of paper and she began to read it.
"That's not a bad name actually. Haruka is pretty cute."
"No," came the slightly muted response from the Dragon Slayer.
"Why not?"
"'Cause Salamander suggested it."
"That's really not a good excuse to ignore a perfectly lovely name you know."
"Your turn Shrimp," Gajeel said as she picked up the fedora and held it in her direction.
"Ugh, fine." She fished through the slips until she grabbed one she silently prayed would be "the one." Who knew that naming a child could be so tortuously frustrating.
"Makarov." Levy deadpanned. "Gajeel, seriously, you do know we're having a girl right?"
"Yeah, but think about it. Who'd want to..." Levy interrupted her husband to vent her irritation.
"What is your obsession with people messing with our kid? YOU are her father, and I am her mother. NOBODY is going to want to bring about the wrath of this baby's parents!"
She shoved her hand back into the hat and grabbed a handful of the little papers. One by one she went through them, tossing the rejects onto the floor.
"No...no...no...no...Metalicanna again!?"
"I still think its a good idea..."
Levy took a deep breath to keep herself calm, overcoming her hormonal desire to choke the living daylights out of the father of her child.
"Probably not for a girl," she explained with forced tranquility.
It was Gajeel's turn to sigh as he snatched another paper from the hat. "Vana."
"Its another reference to metal."
"Its not bad."
"Okay, put it in the keep pile."
"Where's that?"
"Make one." Levy reached in the hat yet again. "Aiko. See, was it so hard to choose a nice name like this one? Why aren't all of yours nice like this?"
"That's not mine Shrimp, look." He pointed at the heart that dotted the "i" in the name, a characteristic marking Lucy as the author.
"Oh. How did they manage to sneak their notes in here? Anyway, the next one says," Levy said as she unfolded another one. "Oh, this one's another one of mine. It's Kaida. It means little dragon."
"Keep."
"Yay!"
"Oi, we're on the last one already Shrimp." Gajeel pointed out as he picked up the final strip of folded parchment. He opened it and shot a devious look at his wife.
"What is it? What does it say?"
Handing her the paper he stood up and walked out of the room. Levy looked down at the scribbled name and screamed, "GAJEEL!"
She tossed the paper to the floor and huffed into the kitchen where her husband was innocently crunching into an apple. The paper landed face up to reveal a single word.
'Metalicanna.'
A/N: This was originally written as my entry for Gajevy Week 2015 "Metalicanna" prompt on Tumblr. There is a prequel drawing from the "Cooking" prompt, as well as a sequel to this story written by GlitterSpires! Awesome points to whoever can tell me what metals I referenced in this one-shot! Also, another shout out to GlitterSpires who gave me a few ideas and worked hard putting up with my antics while BETA reading this thing. Check out her sequel to this story on Tumblr. I love you all, thanks for all the follows, reviews, and comments.