So, I've been writing this one for a while, after I spent like, three hours one day thinking about how the house elves do laundry. I have no life but I love this one and I hope you will too.
This is dedicated to MollyRaesly, who taught me the importance of timing in playful banter and BCDaily who taught me how to have fun with writing.
The first time Lily Evans wore James Potter's shirt was an accident.
Lily grabbed it from the clean laundry pile that the House Elves placed on her trunk the night before. She threw it over her head and as it slid down her face into place she realized how good the shirt smelled. She mused that when her clothes came back from the elves, they never smelled so...good.
She didn't notice it wasn't one of her Gryffindor shirts until the hem fell right above her knees like a very short dress. The soft cotton was well worn and soft against her bare skin, colored scarlet with a lion rearing on the front majestically. Lily pulled it off just as quickly as she'd put it on, checking the tag and seeing no name written in. When she flipped it over to view the back she was in luck.
Not only was she in luck of knowing whose shirt she'd just put on, Lily also knew exactly where to find the shirt's owner. The letters engraved in gold on the back spelled out the word POTTER in all capital letters. The gold glowed in the dim light from Lily's fire and Lily folded it back up.
Lily lifted the collar to her nose and sniffed.
Damn.
She'd have to ask James Potter what aftershave he used.
Or was that weird?
Lily grabbed the shirt once she was done changing with full intention to give it back to its owner…the boy next door.
One of the perks of being Head Girl was having her own room for her last year at Hogwarts. Lily's room was still in Gryffindor tower but instead of having to climb a staircase, her door was conveniently located behind a portrait of Godric Gryffindor's wife. Right next to her 'door' was a portrait of Godric Gryffindor himself and that's where James' private dorm was located. With their rooms being next door to each other, it was understandable that their Gryffindor themed shirts could be misplaced in the wrong pile.
Lily swung her leg out of the portrait hole just in time.
The Head Boy himself emerged from his room clad in scarlet quidditch robes. James' messy black hair was extra messy as it stuck up around the goggles he often wore then it was raining. The lanky seventeen year old closed his portrait door and turned to leave the common room.
"James." Lily called his name and he faltered as he turned himself around at the sound of her voice.
"Alright, Evans?" He asked kindly and Lily didn't miss the way his eyes gauged her playfully from the toes up.
They'd been having a lot of problems with staring at each other recently. Lily herself acknowledged how handsome he looked in his quidditch gear with his sleeves rolled up to his elbow and his hair wildly out of control like he'd already been flying. James' own eyes were calculating when she met them, like he was in Potions class trying to figure out a complex potion formula.
"Fine." She answered noncommittally, "Quidditch practice?"
She already knew the answer was yes. James spent every Sunday with his teammates at the Quidditch Pitch. James was the type of person who never did anything halfway. He was a star student, amazing Quidditch player, and an even better Head Boy than Lily had expected. She was positive he was going to rule the world one day.
James nodded and then pointed at her outfit, "Going to Hogsmede?"
Lily flattened her palms over her muggle jeans and shook her head, "No, just thought I'd switch it up."
She didn't miss the spark of mischief in his eyes when he said, "you should switch it up more often."
She wished that she had enough self-respect to not blush whenever he complimented her in his offhandedly way but her cheeks flushed either way. Lily stepped all the way out of the portrait hole. Moving towards him was always a gamble because he had no personal bubble and he always took advantage when she got close enough. To protect herself, Lily held the shirt up between their bodies with a half smile.
"They mixed up our clothes." She offered when he took the shirt from her with a quizzical look.
James lifted the shirt to her like he was toasting her find, "Cheers."
Then his eyes traveled over her once more before he left her standing in front of her portrait hole alone. Lily went about her Sunday with no changes. She spent a few hours planning out her charms essay, also known as gossiping with Mary McDonald while blank sheets of parchment sat in front of them. She broke up a fight in the charms hallway around three in the afternoon. Lily had dinner and chatted in the common room with her mates until about eight.
Lily didn't think anything else of James Potter's shirt until Monday night.
Lily was running late to her patrolling detail thanks to Anna Faith chatting Lily's ear off at dinner. Lily ran so fast up the steps of the main staircase that by the time she rounded the stairs to the third corridor she was completely out of breathe, her hair was disheveled, and her school skirt had risen two inches higher on her waist.
James was waiting for her. He was leaning so casually against the wall while his hazel eyes took in her disheveled look with quaint amusement. Where James' eyes dropped to her long legs, his hands reached for his hair disheveling it more. Lily stopped halfway to him, positively stunned at how a boy could look so positively full of trouble and yet so innocent at the same time. Lily took her time walking over to him but her heart was still pounding as she apologized profusely to him for being late. James didn't say anything about her tardiness and instead pushed himself up and off the wall so he could straighten her tie. His hands weren't shy as he brushed her tie from her shoulders so it fell against her chest. Next he used his hands to try and flatten her hair back into the wild bun atop her bed.
That was enough, Lily furiously pushed his hands away, "James, it's fine. I'll just be going to bed after this."
James smiled at her bother and wrinkled his nose, shoving his hands into his pockets, "Fine, but don't ever complain to me about my hair."
Lily eyed his extremely messy black tresses with scorn.
When they were kids she used to tease him terribly about not owning a hairbrush because his hair stuck up in every direction. When they were teens she used to bemoan about how he'd mess up his hair just so he'd look like he'd just gotten done a game of quidditch. Now, as adults, Lily didn't want to do anything more than run her own fingers through his hair for him.
Not that she'd ever tell him that because Merlin knew he'd let her and Lily had learned enough about James Potter to know she ought to stay away from him. As far as Lily's hormones were concerned, James was better than honeysuckle tea on a rainy day. As far as Lily's head was concerned, James was best to be kept far away from her hormones.
James started walking away and motioned for her to follow, "Come along Evans and don't dawdle, we have halls to patrol."
Even though she rolled her eyes, her smile didn't quite leave her face.
"Are you ready for snogging?"
James pulled a rubber band ball from his pocket and started to toss it up in the air and catch it as it fell back down. Lily kept her eyes on the little ball, always marveling at how such a lanky dork like James Potter could be so coordinated and never drop the ball on the floor. She waited until he caught the ball again before answering him.
"You?"
He laughed at her joke and threw the ball in the air again, catching it with ease despite twirling to wink at her once.
"Clever."
She smirked at his approval but kept her tone light as she replied openly, "Monday nights are not a heavy snogging night. We should have a pretty easy patrol."
They'd had gotten assigned the best patrolling corridor as far as Lily was concerned. The dungeons were the worst but luckily Professor McGonagall was patrolling the first floor and the Slytherin commons tonight. Professor Flitwick had taken the north towers. Lily knew the Prefects covered the rest of the assigned areas.
James called behind as they entered a long hall filled with suits of armor that stood lengthwise along the hall, "Where do you want to set up camp?"
"In the trophy room." Lily replied easily as her eyes swept around the suits of armor, lit red and orange from the torches.
James led the way into the trophy room, still throwing and catching his ball. Lily had a bag with parchment in it so she could start on her Advanced Charms essay. James fell to the floor and Lily sat down next to him, leaning her back against the case he'd sat under. James began bouncing the ball across the ground so that it'd hit the opposite case and come bouncing back to him. The sound of the ball bouncing back and forth didn't bother Lily as she worked on her paper; in fact the sound was soothing since she hated dead quiet.
All in all, it was a normal Monday night.
Monday nights, funnily enough, were Lily's favorites. James didn't expect anything from her and vies versa. They simply enjoyed each other's company and watched for trouble. Sometimes James would bring playing cards and they'd play games of exploding snap until midnight. Sometimes they walked the length of the dark dungeons and James walked directly next to her, entertaining her with stories of his youth. And sometimes…sometimes Lily felt like they were becoming something more than friends.
James knew things about Lily she didn't share with many. He knew that she had trouble at home with her sister and sick mother. He knew she was trying to get into the potions department at the Ministry. He knew so many secrets that sometimes she wondered if maybe she told him too much but James was so easy to talk too, she couldn't stop talking. Even now, with the crystal trophy cases glimmering in the moonlight and his ball bouncing across the room, Lily was talking.
"How was practice yesterday?"
"Fine." James said, placing the rubber band ball between them and placing his head against the wooden cabinets behind them, "Anna Faith is struggling with her hawk dives, I got hit by a bludger in the back, and I think Anthony Hopkins is an idiot."
Lily leaned her head against the cabinets to mirror James' position. She turned her cheek so she could look at James. He was staring at the glass windows and the moon that shimmered outside. It was a half moon and was very beautiful. The only light in the trophy room came from the cases themselves, so James was bathed in a golden light, and Lily thought he was so handsome.
"Anna mentioned her dives were bad." Lily commented, trying to keep her mind off James' looks.
Suddenly, James turned his head so he was staring at her. They stared into each other's eyes for a moment. He got under her skin like no one else. It was like whenever she was near him she saw fighting a war just to keep her hands to herself. James cleared his throat and adjusted so his back was flatter against the cabinet.
"So, is your back pain related to why Anthony Hopkins an idiot?"
She really should've just gone back to essay.
"He fancies himself a ladies man." James grumbled, crossing one leg over the other in agitation.
Lily lifted her head and looked at James, "What?"
Anthony Hopkins was anything but a ladies man. The number of times Lily had found the Gryffindor beater getting told off by girls for being an absolute prick was uncountable. He liked to shag multiple women and had a thing for keeping tally's in his belts. Lily didn't quite despise him but she definitely avoided him in the hallways.
James pushed his glasses up his face, "He spent the entire practice talking about how he was going to get this one girl to go to Hogsmede with him in two weeks and when I told him to stuff it he shot the bludger at me and told me it was an accident."
"Why do you care who Anthony Hopkin's tries to shag at Hogsmede?" Lily snorted, "Don't you have better things to worry about?"
James unfolded his hands from behind his head, "Well normally I wouldn't care." He nudged her foot carefully with his ankle, "but this was different."
"Oh." She smiled and he noted her condescending voice.
"I broke my spine for you, never forget it."
James leaned off the cabinet and turned his back to her, lifting up his shirt to show a giant blue and black bruise on the lower half of his back. Immediately Lily placed her hand on his shoulder and he tensed under her touch. His skin burned against her cool fingertips and Lily bit her lip.
"Ouch." She muttered.
"Anthony Hopkins has a wicked aim." James said once she moved her hand away, "It's the only reason I didn't bury him on that field."
Lily reached for her bag and pulled out her wand from the open pouch.
"I can heal you." She murmured, "Just don't move, alright?"
He helped by holding up the sides to his shirt and pulling the shirt off she she was staring intimately at his back. Lily bit her tongue as he flung the shirt back at her and it flew onto her shoulder, accosting her senses with James' wicked aftershave. Instead of focusing on the fact that it was the second time that week she was wearing James' shirt, Lily focused on the bruise. She'd been working on healing charms and the bruise looked simple enough to fix. Lily's fingertips brushed against the bruise and James shifted under her touch.
Lily eyes flickered up to his head for a moment. She couldn't see his expression since he was faced away from her and she figured that not being able to look into his eyes was a saving grace. Lily was careful to only touch James' back with the tip of her wand during the rest of the healing process.
Lily ran her wand along the edges of the bruise and murmured, "Episky."
The blue and purple slowly faded away and transformed back into normal colored skin. James' muscles relaxed and contorted back to normal as well, allowing his shoulders to loosen. Lily pulled her wand away, happily assessing her work. James stretched dramatically and moaned happily as the muscles on his back rippled with his movement.
"You're welcome." She replied as he twisted to crack his back.
"I owe you one, Lily."
She tossed his shirt back to him and he caught it easily, throwing it back over his head until it covered him properly. He sighed and fell back against the case beside her, smiling at her like she was the moon.
"Anything for you James."
And she wasn't teasing and he wasn't smiling anymore.
He leaned closer and she knew what he wanted. It was the same thing she'd been wanting since sixth year ended and that's what scared Lily the most. She dropped her head and stared at her lap. James pulled away abruptly and sighed, throwing his hands behind his head, trying to act as if her rejection hadn't hurt him.
Her rejection hurt her the most, she supposed.
"Lily?"
Lily knew James was never playing around when he called her by her first name so she turned her head to look at him quizzically. James looked worried and he was staring at his fingers instead of her. Lily's fingers flexed at her side, wanting to reach out for him.
"What?" she finally asked.
She could feel her ears heat up under the pressure of his serious tone.
For a moment James struggled with the words and then, "I like spending time with you."
He captured her attention with those words and she felt her heart start to pound in her chest. He knew what he was doing, James was not as nervous as her, in fact he was ready to jump all in. Lily was afraid once she jumped in that she wouldn't be able to jump back out because she'd never want too. She was so afraid of losing him that she never liked to consider that she was losing herself when she avoided her feelings.
"I like it too, James." She told him truthfully.
The way his face lit up Lily would've thought someone had handed him the Quidditch Cup. James settled down right next to her and they remained quiet the rest of the night, caught up in their own thoughts. Lily was waiting for James to give up his chase and James was waiting for her feet to catch up to his race.
It was probably the rainiest week on record at Hogwarts. The rain was cold and came down in sheets. The Great Lake was overflowing into the woods. Outdoor classes were cancelled and moved indoors. Lily's only outdoor class was Care of Magical Creatures and she was relieved when they were told to meet at a first floor classroom...until the rainstorm prompted mad old Professor Kettleburn to take his students for walks along the flooding Great Lake. Professor Kettleburn was convinced they could find bow truckles for Professor Slughorn's second year Potions class but after only twenty minutes in the downpour he finally gave up and dismissed the class.
James' best mate Sirius took the class with Lily. Sirius had a witty attitude about him that Lily found amusing so she often hung around him for laughs. Naturally with the heavy rain came unhappy students and Sirius Black was one of those unhappy students. In fact, Sirius was livid.
"What fucking Professor tries to give his students hypothermia?" Sirius complained loudly as they raced for the castle steps where it was a mad run for the common rooms and hot showers. "I—I—don't know…"
Lily's teeth chattered as she followed Sirius up the main staircase.
Sirius was undoing the bun atop his head, letting his shoulder length hair fall. Sirius shook his head out like a dog and Lily scowled when water droplets hit her in the face. Sirius grinned sheepishly when he looked back and saw her annoyed look.
"Sorry, Lily." He apologized without much empathy.
"It's fine," she grumbled, squeezing out her robes, "It's not like I'm not already soaked to the bone."
They made it into the common room where everyone dry worked hard to avoid the students trampling in looking like they'd walked through a monsoon. Sirius acknowledged Lily for her company before disappearing up the boy's staircase. Lily walked over to her portrait hole and swung it open with desperation.
The first thing she did was unbutton her robes, thowing them to her floor in protest. Lily was just starting to take off her underclothes only to be interrupted from her wet sulking. Her portrait door swung open and Lily awkwardly pulled the straps of her bra back up quickly.
"What the hell?" she demanded.
"Light of my life!"
Even though she was soaked to the bone, even though her fingers were numb, and even though she wanted to scream…she still managed to feel a little warmth in the pit of her stomach as she turned towards James Potter's elated voice. James paused in his declaration, looking her up and down. Lily was still shivering, her red hair dripping and pooling puddles by her feet.
"Go swimming in the lake?" he joked, eyeing her soaked vest thankfully, "You forgot to invite me."
Lily crossed her arms over herself and glared at him, "Make it fast James, my goosebumps have goosebumps."
Lily's teeth chattered and James frowned.
Then, without any warning (not even a "here comes my shirt") James unbuttoned his robes, reached up and pulled his shirt off. Lily's jaw dropped as he tossed the red shirt over her head awkwardly. The warm fabric covered Lily's damp skin and she was engulfed in his cologne again. Lily was using every curse word in the book as her heart skipped a beat and her stomach flopped excitedly.
It was the third time she wore his shirt…in a week…and it was destroying her complex.
She closed her eyes, savoring the moment before she pulled the shirt down over herself and glared at him. He was laughing at her expression as he buttoned his robes back up over his bare chest, not even concerned.
"Why did you barge into my room, Potter?" she wasn't about to let him get away with anything, especially not while wrapped up in his clothes.
"Listen," James said, "I'm gonna need you to halt on the blankets and hot chocolate party."
"More like hot shower." Lily mumbled, thinking of her private bathroom where James could not enter.
They might have each other's passwords but she was considering changing it already, just so James couldn't barge in and brand them both topless in a matter of seconds. Lily wound her hair up at the nape of her neck and squeezed it so more water dripped onto her floor. James explained his remarkably impeccable timing.
"Some arse dropped milk in Savannah Long's tea and now she's in the infirmary throwing up buckets." James continued, pointedly ignoring her shower comment, "So keep my shirt on, follow me, and get ready for all night rounds Head Girl."
Lily moaned and grabbed her wand from off her bed before she grumpily followed James out of her warm room into the drafty commons. A few students turned to stare at them both but everyone else was gathered around the radio, listening to a popular wizard band play a set of their top hits live.
"James why." She lamented as her portrait door closed behind them.
Lily might've had his dry shirt on but her school skirt was still soaked and her shoes squeaked from the amount of water that leaked into them. Lily struggled to squeeze the rest of the water from her red hair.
"Because Long cheated on Michael Amoco and I'm pretty sure he poisoned her." James sniggered as she stomped into step with him.
Lily forgot about her wet skirt momentarily to gasp at James, "Someone finally told Michael about Savannah shagging George?"
"Savannah told Michael." James treated Lily to the school gossip as they exited the portrait hole of the Gryffindor commons into the dark Hogwarts hallways, "What were you doing in Transfiguration that you didn't see the weepy scene happening on the Ravenclaw side?"
Lily bit her lip and playfully side stepped away from James while singing, "Nothing."
He caught her aversion and he pointed his finger at her, "Ah, you're hiding something!" he called her out.
Lily sealed her lips and he snorted, reaching out to push her away. Lily laughed as she covered face to hide her blush. Lily would never admit that the reason she'd not noticed the drama between Long and Avoco was because she'd been too busy staring at James. He'd been doodling on his parchment all class; she just didn't get to see what he'd drawn.
Lily pulled her hands from her face to see he was staring down at her with a positively endearing look.
"You're a liar, Lily Evans."
"I didn't say anything!" she argued.
"You didn't have too." He rolled his eyes, "I've known you since we were eleven."
Lily countered his rolling of the eyes with an eye roll of her own. Their footsteps were in sync as they made their way from the Gryffindor common room to wherever Savannah Long had been assigned to patrol. Lily squeezed water from her skirt as they walked, ignoring the fact that James' shirt pretty much covered the skirt to begin with.
"So, where do you and Savannah normally patrol on Wednesdays?"
James sighed ominously, "The greenhouses."
"No!" Lily felt like crying as soon as he said the word greenhouse, "I have to go back outside?"
"Yes." He did look apologetic once he realized her discomfort, "That's why I didn't bother having you change."
"Jaaammmesssss." She stopped walking and leaned against the wall in protest.
He laughed at her childish practice and turned, shoving his hands into his robe pockets. He shook his head at her, like she was the funniest thing he'd ever seen and he couldn't believe it.
"I know," he understood, "Its shitty but I can assure you, I have no plans to walk outside the entire time. We'll patrol the insides. No one in their right mind would be outside on a night like this anyways."
James was at least right about that. Once they came upon the door that led outside to the greenhouses and Lily opened it, it was clear that the rain hadn't even slowed down. The rain sloshed into the hallway and Lily sent James an annoyed face that he laughed at.
"Don't be mad at me, be mad at Savannah Long."
James grabbed her hand and took off for the first greenhouse door they came upon. With a clever yank on the door handle James threw Lily inside the dark and humid glass house. Even though she'd only been in the rain for twenty seconds at most, raindrops had still pierced through James' shirt and her knees were soaking wet again. James shook out beside her and then grabbed his wand from his pocket. The rain had flattened his hair against his forehead and covered his glasses so that James couldn't see very well.
Lily stood there shivering in the darkness of the herbology classroom in Greenhouse One but she laughed as he sent a tickling hot breeze her way from the tip of his wand. Slowly the shirt and skirt that she wore were dry. Then James did the same to his own robes.
"Thanks."
"Anything for you Evans." Her countered with a wink before looking around them.
Lily looked around the dark and musty classroom. Random assorted pots were thrown all over and plants with long tentacle like arms stretched for them from the ceiling. James used his wand to light up their way as they left the classroom and entered the main Greenhouse where third years were raising a collection of Hestia; pretty white flowers with yellow middles. Lily let her fingers slide along the flowers resting next to the glass panes. The building was all glass and normally Lily thought the building was pretty but tonight with the wind coming down in sheets, nothing could be seen through the glass except black rain.
James found a spot for them to sit. Two overturned pots facing the Hestia proved the perfect spot for them to patrol from. Lily sat next to James, fanning her skirt over her legs and kicking off her shoes so that her toes could be free from restriction. James kept his wand out and made colorful bubbles trail through the dark air, magic of his own that could not be replicated. The bubbles changed colors as they danced around her face and she played a game with herself, trying to pop the bubbles before they floated out of her reach.
After an hour the game stopped and Lily slid from the overturned pot to the tiled floor. She extended her feet out under her and looked up to see that James was staring at her with an off expression.
"What?" she asked him with a smile.
He swallowed, "We're close right?"
Lily just stared at him. James licked his lip and slid off his own pot so that he could kneel beside Lily on the floor. Lily didn't quite know what to do when he slid into her space so readily. She kept her hands down, fingers gripping his shirt tightly. James' hazel eyes were hard to look away from and Lily thought she saw a flicker of a smile pass his face.
"Can I say something crazy?"
"You normally do anyways." She tried to be casual, unreadable, but James saw right through her façade.
"I'm about to be romantic so hold onto your bloody pride for a second, would you?"
"Fuck."
Instead of being offended by her blatant slip of the word James just cackled and plopped himself right beside her on the floor.
"I've got to be honest," he continued, "When you admitted to the House Elves switching up our clothes I spent the entire practice imagining what you'd look like in one of my shirts."
"Sorry to disappoint."
Her self deprecating tone only made him lean in closer, his long nose an inch from her cheek, "Ah, Evans. You look way hotter than I even imagined."
"We can't snog here James." Her voice cracked, "We're on rounds."
James sat back in shock then eyed her peculiarly, "But you aren't fully opposed to snogging me?"
Lily kept her eyes on the Hestia plants, "I'm not fully apposed to anything."
"Wait." James placed a hand on his heart, "You aren't fully opposed to anything?"
"No?" Lily looked at him, wondering where on earth he was going with his wicked little smirk and wandering hands.
"So if I were to say, snog you tomorrow," he calculated with a precise look, "You wouldn't fully oppose it?"
"Ah-" he put finger on her mouth to stop her from speaking.
"Shhh," he whispered blissfully, "Don't answer that."
"Oh Merlin." She muttered against his finger before he pulled it away excitedly. She glared at him with all her might, "You wouldn't do it anyways."
James arched an eyebrow at her, "You don't think I'd kiss you?"
Lily crossed her arms, "No." she raised an eyebrow at him, "You wouldn't because you'd be afraid."
"Afraid of what?" James scoffed.
Lily's chest felt like it would cave in under the pressure of his stare, "Afraid of what would happen."
James lost his smile and frowned, "That's the pot calling the kettle black."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Lily huffed.
James pushed his glasses up his nose as he glared at her, "Obviously that if there's anyone in this entire fucking castle afraid of what would happen if we stepped over our boundaries, it's you." He waved his hand at her, "I've never seen someone blatantly push me away so effortlessly since Remus Lupin in my third year when I called him out for being an prick."
Lily opened and closed her mouth twice before answering with hurt in her voice, "I'm not pushing you away."
James rolled his eyes and stood up, "Yeah, sure Lily."
Lily watched as he walked over to the Hestia and examined one of the pots beside it. She was not pushing him away; was she? Everything about James Potter drew her in like a wave gets pulled to the shore. If anything, he was the one pushing.
Only he was pushing her closer and closer into his arms.
Lily sighed in defeat and stood up, brushing off James' shirt and smiling to herself when she noticed it was the same one she'd found in her pile of clothes on Sunday. Lily went to go stand next to James over the flowers, pointedly keeping herself a good distance away from him.
"Listen, James," she murmured, "Clearly we've still got some issues to work out…"
"Issues?" James sounded sarcastic and she winced, "Lily, my only issue is how badly I have it for you."
Lily froze, one hand on the flowers, head tilted sideways at him. James' left hand lifted to his hair when he turned his head and found her just standing there staring at him stupidly. He suddenly looked sheepish, like he hadn't meant to say exactly that. James' eyes, almost black in the dark, traced her body from her toes up.
"Nothing to say to that?" he commented, almost breathlessly.
Lily answered truthfully, "I don't know."
James shook his head and leaned against the table holding the flowers. He continued staring at her as she fiddled with the edges of his shirt and stared at the ground. She had no idea how to tell him exactly how she felt because she didn't even know why her stomach rolled when she saw him or why her heart picked up when he said her name. Lily couldn't explain how much she had come to need him around for her own personal reasons or how she loved his laughter.
"Okay." James muttered, almost sounding frustrated as he turned his back away from her, "Alright."
"James." Lily begged, "Don't be mad—"
James' shoulders dropped and he shot a look behind, "I'm not mad, I just wish you'd stop questioning what you see in me."
James was the kindest, funniest, best guy she'd ever known. She wasn't at all questioning what she saw in him, she was questioning what James saw in her. What was so special about the girl from Cokesworth that James literally spent half their time knowing each other, adoring her? Lily was afraid when they broke through the glass wall between them that James would wake up and realize Lily was nobody special. She was the daughter of two muggles, proud and clever, but secretly insecure about her skills, her life, and her friends.
James didn't pester her anymore about feelings, in fact he didn't pester her at all as they finished their rounds and headed back to the common room. The common room was silent and empty at one in the morning. James was slightly ahead of her, keeping his thoughts to himself and she hated it. Normally he was an open book but now he was keeping himself shut off. They'd come so far as friends and she knew that he wanted more.
She did too.
Lily stopped following him and stood still, placing a hand on the couch for some support. James looked over his shoulder and when their eyes met, for a minute Lily was able to think clearly. James' glasses were sliding down his nose as he examined her frozen stance by the couch. Even though he was mad at her and she was frustrated with herself, he only had eyes for her.
"I'm not questioning what I see in you." She said, capturing his attention enough that he fully turned to face her, "I'm questioning what you see in me."
James' stone cold face shifted and became warm and comforting, "Have I ever given you a reason to question how I feel about you?"
"No but—"
"This ought to be good."
"What if you get sick of me?"
"I've never heard anything more ridiculous."
"Savannah Long got sick of Michael Amoco."
James rolled his eyes at her; "Don't even try to compare what we have to those idiots." Then he stammered, "Wait, are you afraid that you'd get sick of me?"
Lily furrowed her brows together at him angrily, "Of course not!"
James half laughed, half moaned, "Then why are you making this so difficult?"
"I'm making it difficult?" she asked, puzzled.
James' eyes went a bit hazy, "Lily Evans. You don't even know." He shook his finger at her, "The past few months I've had to deal with your continual stares in the classroom. I've had to hold my breath anytime you get closer than you are now because you smell amazing. I've literally avoided Hogsmede so I wouldn't get jealous if you went out with any other bloke. I've had to tell myself not to snog you when you do or say anything remotely sexy."
"Sorry." She grumbled, like a kid put in time out.
"I'm barely functioning Evans, you drive me mad!"
"The feelings quite mutual." She muttered nonsensically.
He actually laughed at that one, a real laugh that she felt down to her toes. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and she smiled, a usual reaction to his laughter. She was surprised when James placed two hands on her shoulders, forcing her to look up at him. His eyes were soft again and she felt herself relaxing under his adoring smile.
"And Merlin Evans," he whispered, "Nothings ever driven me quite as mad as seeing you wear my shirt all night."
Lily saw the look in his eyes, the same one she'd been avoiding all year. In that moment, Lily decided not to ignore his looks anymore. Lily leaned up on her tiptoes and surprised James when she pressed her lips against his. It took all of three seconds for James to respond by pushing her back against the couch and returning her kiss with a playful nip to her lower lip. His kissing was persistent and rushed, likely all the pent up energy he'd been holding back.
Lily loved everything about it.
She leaned into the back of the couch, meeting his kisses with a pathetic attempt to slow them down. James' hands were in her hair, on her waist, all over her body really. It did no good, Lily decided, avoiding James for so long. Kissing him was like pulling the trigger of a gun and it set her off. Her hands were tangled in his robes and his glasses were pushing into her nose.
Lily didn't want to be caught snogging in the common room like a fifth year so she broke the kiss and grabbed his hand with earnest, pulling him to the farthest corner of the common room. James kissed her hand as she pulled him along until they were behind the boy's staircase, then he put his lips to better use. He pushed her back into the castle wall and she was enveloped in him, becoming attached with each lingering second.
He broke away and her chest rose and fell as she stared at him in wonder. She was kissing James Potter in the common room while wearing his shirt after running around in the rain with him. James' lips were darker from kissing her and his hands kept tracing up and down her arms. He was staring at her like she was going to depart and then he grinned roguishly.
"What?" Lily smiled nervously, not trusting the smirk.
"Would you be fully opposed to becoming my girlfriend?" he asked cleverly.
She laughed and he took that as a no, swallowing her laugh with another kiss that led into another kiss, which led into being so wound up in James that she felt lightheaded. When they finally broke apart Lily's hair was pulled to one side of her neck and James' black hair was so flyaway that it looked like he had been in a wind tunnel. Lily licked her swollen lips and stayed leaning against the bookshelf, just smiling at James.
He smiled down at her too, looking mighty proud of himself, "I'd better be getting to bed." He murmured, pausing only to run a finger across her cheek, "Before I can't leave you standing here looking lovelier than anything."
Lily nodded and reached to take the shirt off but James stopped her hands and tightened the shirt around her hips with a wink.
"Keep it." He told her, "The look suits you."
It wasn't the first time Lily Evans wore James Potter's shirt and it certainly wouldn't be the last.
Thanks for reading! Please tell me what you think!
xxx
Petals