Quick SA thing I made during NaNoWriMo to catch up with word count. Can be seen as an SA that's to do with my fics Nowhere Left To Run and Without You I'm Not A Survivor, but can be seen as a separate SA if you want to!
"I had a great time out tonight." Tom smiled at my front door, playing with his own house keys. "I did too, though we were out at a premier, it still felt kinda date like." I agreed, we'd just been out see the latest Die Hard film, but it still felt like a date. "It did, I enjoyed it." Tom nodded, biting at his lip, "I should probably go though, we've got an early morning don't we?" he continued, sighing a bit. He had never stayed round mine in the four months we'd been dating, because he was self conscious, recovering from an eating disorder in fact, and he wasn't ready to share a bed yet. I was fine with that, as long as Tom felt comfortable with our relationship, knowing just how little experience he'd had with relationships.
"I did too, though I think we should go and see a film normally, just the two of us, no cameras or anything, whatya say?" I raised an eyebrow, leaning on my front door. "Yeah, sure, I'd like that." Tom agreed, making me smile. "Great, its a date... but yeah, I better get inside and go to bed, like you said, we'd got an early morning, unless you'd like to stay?" I gave him the opportunity to come in, in case he wanted to, but didn't know how to say it. "Erm, yeah, I'd like that. Maybe we could, y'know... bed share, for warmth, its cold tonight." Tom blushed bright red, making me laugh a little, he really had no idea on how to approach the situation, even though he did want it. I could tell by the way he was blushing, and the way he was asking about it. He'd never asked to share a bed, even when I'd offered a few times, always not feeling that good about it. But now, I could tell, he wanted to shared a bed with me, or at least try too.
"Alright, come in, I've got some spare pyjamas in the wardrobe for you if you want them." I let us in, leading us upstairs, the both of us getting ready, before hesitantly getting in together. I decided to take things slow, letting Tom curl up as close as he wanted to be, which was pretty close as it turned out. He curled up so close our legs were entangled, resting his head next to my chest. "Goodnight Tom, have a nice sleep." I gently kissed his head, enjoying the feeling of his warm body in my arms. "Goodnight, have a nice sleep too." Tom whispered, looking a bit scared and a bit awkward if I was honest. But, he did still manage to fall asleep, looking so adorable and relaxed in my arms, his hand fisting my tshirt.
I'd never seen just how cute Tom could be when he slept, after all that time we'd spent in hotels together, and in our parents houses when it had just been the two of us years ago, I'd never noticed just how cute Tom was. Maybe that was because he'd hidden underneath the duvet, refusing to move from there all night, but now, because he was laying there, exposed to me in my arms. He looked adorable, like a little child, it made me feel so much more in love with him. "Goodnight Tom, sweet dreams." I smiled, kissing his hair gently again, before falling asleep myself.
"N-N-No, please. No, I-I, I can't, no!" I was woken up by the sound of Tom moaning in his sleep, and not in a pleasant way. He sounded scared, really scared, like he was having a nightmare. "P-Please don't hurt me! Don't h-hurt me!" Tom whimpered again, writhing in the covers. "Tom, Tom, its a dream. Its all a dream. You're safe." I whispered gently, stroking his hair back calmingly. "No please! I don't, stop! Stop, please stop!" Tom cried out again, starting to shiver, and really worry me. What was he dreaming about? It looked really distressing, and I didn't know how to help him. "Tom its a nightmare, wake up! Please wake up, you're safe here!" I tried waking him up, this time succeeding, making Tom sit bolt upright, heaving in breath.
"What the hell was that all about? Are you alright?" I asked, rubbing his sweaty back gently, trying to calm him a little. "Yeah, yeah, I'm alright. I'm alright. Just a nightmare, only a nightmare." Tom nodded, heaving in his breath, flopping back down on the mattress again. "Are you sure you're okay, you look a little... well, ill." He did look ill, really pale and scared. "I'm fine, its just a nightmare, I'm used to it." Tom answered, calming down. "Used to it? Does this happen a lot?" I asked, I hadn't heard anything Tom having nightmares.
"Er... they happen sometimes. Not often," Tom bit his lip, a clear sign he was lying. "Really? How often?" I questioned, gently rubbing my back. "I dunno, 'bout once a week, I think. Isn't that normal?" Tom shrugged, looking up at me like I had the answers. "Erm, I don't think that's normal. I don't have that many nightmares." I didn't know what to say about it. It wasn't normal to be having that many nightmares, but at the same time I didn't want Tom to think that he wasn't normal. He still had low self esteem, I didn't want to make him feel any worse. "Oh... I didn't know that... sorry, if this makes sleeping in bed together awkward." Tom sighed, shifting in his sheets, like he wanted to get out.
"It doesn't make it awkward at all. I'm sure we can figure something out to help out, is there anything you do usually that helps you sleep?" I hadn't heard of anything that Tom had done before when we'd shared rooms. But maybe he'd found something that helped, then again he'd never had any nightmares when we shared rooms, maybe this was a new thing, so he hadn't had the chance to figure something to help you out. "I, er... I don't want to put you out." Tom whispered, looking so painfully awkward as he shifted around. "It won't be putting me out, I promise. If it helps you sleep, I wanna know, you can't go on having nightmares all the time." I shrugged at him, it couldn't have been that ridiculous, and I could sleep through anything. So if Tom needed something, then I wanted to give it to him. I would have hated to know he was having nightmares, and there was nothing I could do to help.
"I erm, I usually sleep with the TV on." Tom whispered, he sounded ashamed of what he was saying. "Okay, I can deal with that, simple enough really." I grabbed the TV remote, switching on the TV. "Thanks." Tom flashed a smile, starting to relax a little. "Does this make you feel better then?" I rubbed his back gently, kissing his hair. "Yeah, yeah it does. It helps. The light, it keeps me safe, from things hiding in the dark." Tom shivered slightly, hugging my arm. "What things? Want to talk about it?" I offered him the chance to talk, knowing that he did sometimes need it. "Its stupid, really stupid." Tom bit his lip again, looking so self conscious.
"We all have stupid things we're scared of. Its a perfectly normal thing, and I'm not going to laugh at you for it either." I smiled at him encouragingly. "I guess. Erm, when I was little, my Dad, he told me stories of aliens hiding in the dark, and it scared me, a whole lot. And every since I was six, I haven't slept the whole night through without thinking about it. It terrifies me. I can't sleep out of fear some nights." Tom explained, facing the floor in shame. "Oh Tom, that sounds horrible." I sighed, feeling so sorry for him. I myself couldn't see the fear in that, but looking at fear on his face, I could tell that he was terrified of this. "It... It is yeah. That's why I have the TV on, the light... the light is on me, so the aliens and monsters can't get to me, because they can't get out of the dark." Tom nodded. "Makes sense. But yeah if you want to keep the TV on, I don't mind that. It keeps the nightmares away, so I don't see why we can't keep it on." I made him smile a little bit. "Thanks, it really helps. Really, really does." Tom smiled a bit bigger.
So, I turned on the TV, shuffling closer to Tom's side, watching Tom relax. "You good?" I asked, trailing my fingers over his back. "Yeah, yeah that's better, much better. And we can turn the sound down too, I usually have the sound down, so I can hear it, but it doesn't disturb my sleep." Tom nodded, sounding a bit desperate to keep me happy. "That's cool, we can do that too." I turned the sound down, so it was at minimal volume. We could still hear what was going on, but it was more background noise than anything else. "Thanks, it means a whole lot, it really does." Tom hugged me tight in thanks, and I could tell he was so grateful for this.
"No problem at all Tommy. No problem at all. If it helps you sleep, its all good with me, I usually sleep with music on anyway, so I'm used to the sound." I shrugged, not lying, I did usually sleep with music playing, so I wasn't used to it. "Are you sure? Cause we can turn the sound off, if you need to turn the sound off." Tom looked distressed again as we spoke, like he was desperate to make sure that I was okay with this. "Tom, honey, its fine, honestly. I sleep with music anyway, its fine." I kissed his hair gently, "Now is there anything else you need? Like the lamp on or anything else?" I continued, ready to wrap that conversation up.
"Er, no, the lamp and stuff doesn't need to be on. I only really need the TV, other than that, I'm good." Tom nodded, edging down the bed again, curling up completely underneath the covers, hiding his whole body, save for his head, underneath the duvet. "Awesome, but if you need anything, then I'll happily help you with it. Whatever you need, sleeping pills, TVs or lamps on, music, whatever it is. I'll happily go along with it." I slid down again, wrapping him in my arms, pulling him to lay on my chest. "Thanks, but honestly, its okay. I'm okay with this." Tom nodded, holding my arm gently.
"Alright, but never be afraid to tell me if you need anything from me." I kissed his shoulder, squeezing his waist tight. "Thank you." Tom smiled, relaxing against me, finally falling asleep properly, staying asleep the whole night through. Like he did for the rest of the time we slept in bed together, and he even got more confident, slowly his confidence up to a level where he could lay with me, the both of us completely naked, without him worrying about how he looked. Because he was perfect the way he was, and just because he had a slightly weird fear of aliens hiding in the dark, it didn't mean he wasn't still my Tom, who I would do anything for, just so he was comfortable.