A/N: This is a two part story and my first High School Musical fic. I have had this story in my head ever since seeing the first movie, and I just had to write it the way I originally planned, it's pre-HSM2.
Part One
When Gabriella Montez came to East High, Chad hated her. And he hated the damn school musical. Because both things had Troy slipping further and further away from him. He was extremely jealous that Troy was spending all of his time with Gabriella rather than the team…than him.
Of course, his excuse for his escalating resentment was that he was concerned about the team. And everyone else bought this because, when was Chad ever concerned about anything but basketball?
The thing was, Chad didn't only care about basketball…he cared about Troy. Basketball was something that kept him close to Troy, and that was why he revelled in it. But when he saw Troy lose his concentration, he got scared. He didn't want to lose his best friend.
So he tried to sabotage his best friend's relationship with Gabriella. And he succeeded. And he was overjoyed he had his friend back by his side. But his euphoria didn't last long, because he knew Troy, and he knew Troy wasn't happy.
When Chad saw the sad look on Troy's face when he wouldn't sit with Chad at lunch that day, he knew he had done the wrong thing. He had been selfish. He hadn't cared about Troy's feelings…just his own.
Chad loved his best friend. Chad was in love with his best friend. And that day he realised that he would never have him. He realised no matter what he did to try and keep Troy away from Gabriella, it wouldn't make a single bit of difference if Troy didn't love him in return.
All Chad had accomplished was making his best friend hurt. And he knew that he would rather see Troy happy and with Gabriella, than not happy…and with no-one.
-
Chad had asked Taylor out, in the hope that it would help him get over his impending homosexuality, and more importantly the crush he had on his unattainable best friend.
However, he came to very much regret this decision. He liked Taylor well enough…but she just wasn't him. He and Taylor both knew that they didn't have a future. They had no chemistry. They were just two friends that kept each other company…because neither of them liked the left out feeling they had when Troy and Gabriella started dating.
Chad especially disliked all the free time he had once Troy started rehearsing for 'Twinkle Towne'. Even Taylor was often too busy to hang out with him. However much he despised them, he found himself looking forward to his ritual Saturday night double dates with Taylor, Troy and Gabriella. It was the only quality time he got to spend with Troy.
Chad found himself alone a lot of the time…which meant he often found himself in the state of self reflection. Something he previously had avoided at all costs. And even though Chad knew he couldn't have him…the more he fell for his best friend.
-
One day after school, Chad had just finished saying goodbye to Troy and was watching him walk down the deserted corridor toward the theatre; he was so enthralled with Troy's graceful stroll that he failed to notice that a completely different boy was standing behind him.
"You're wasting your time, you know," said the voice fluidly.
Chad whipped his head around and came face to face with Ryan Evans. "What are you talking about?" Chad demanded, feigning complete ignorance.
"Troy. He is absolutely smitten with Gabriella Montez," said Ryan matter-of-factly. Being from the theatre he was immune to Chad's amateur acting skills.
"So, what do I care?" Chad continued in the vain hope that Ryan would believe his lies.
Ryan raised his eyebrows annoyingly, and Chad felt himself going red. This boy could see right through him and it was unnerving. Was he that obvious? Or did Ryan just have some kind of sixth sense?
"I can't believe you of all people are trying to imply that I am gay!" Chad snarled.
"You said it, not me." Ryan replied.
Chad huffed incredulously.
Ryan continued, "I have never tried to deny my sexuality, whereas you obviously are." He paused and watched Chad's face start to distort with rage, and decided to try a different tactic. "Look, despite what you might think, I just want to help you. If you ever want to talk about it, I am willing to listen." And he turned on his heel and made his way down the hall.
Something about this offer left Chad feeling quite defeated. Ryan definitely wasn't scholastic decathlon material…but he wasn't a fool. And Chad realised he needed him. "Ryan…wait!" Chad called out.
Chad expected Ryan to have some sort of Evans-ish smirk on his face when he turned back to face him…but he didn't. He looked friendly.
"Um…What would Sharpay say if she knew you were offering me…friendship, right now?" Chad asked, staring down at his feet.
"Friendship?" said Ryan, the predicted smirk appearing at his lips, "Who said anything about friendship?"
Again, Chad blushed. But Ryan soon put him out of his misery as he started giggling, "I'm just kidding!"
Chad gave Ryan a wary look, and wondered what he was getting himself into. "Ha Ha," he said dryly, "So what about Sharpay?"
Ryan looked slightly perturbed at Chad's insistence of an answer. He thought for a minute before saying, "She doesn't own me," though he didn't seem so confident with his reply.
He studied Chad for another moment before pulling his cell phone from his bag, and asking Chad for his number. As the boys exchanged numbers Chad knew that his life was about to change. He didn't know what this unusual alliance with the Evans boy was, or what it meant. But he knew it was important.
-
Soon Chad was spending the free time he would ordinarily be spending with Troy, with Ryan. Ryan had plenty of spare time too as he wasn't the lead in the musical this year. However Ryan wasn't holding a grudge about this the way his sister was, and so was able to take an objective view on Chad's predicament.
Chad could tell Ryan anything without feeling judged. He actually felt quite relieved to be letting out his deepest secrets. Things he had never told anyone. And he felt surprisingly comfortable doing so.
Chad supposed Ryan was such a great listener probably because his sister never let him say anything. But the fact that Ryan hardly ever spoke about himself did not go unnoticed by Chad.
At first they only ever talked about Chad and his problems. But Chad eventually noticed that they never talked about Ryan. Chad had never before considered Ryan to be anything other than 'The Drama King' or 'Sharpay's brother'. But the more he hung out with Ryan the more he came to like him, and so the more he wanted to know about him.
Ryan always seemed to change the subject whenever their conversations turned to him, however. And Chad had officially made it one of his goals to learn as much as he could about the more submissive Evans child when…Troy and Gabriella had a fight.
And Troy all of a sudden was interested in Chad again. Chad couldn't deny that he wasn't pleased to be spending so much time with his best friend again. But he also felt guilty when he started turning down Ryan's invitations to hang out together. Chad knew he wasn't being fair to Ryan, especially after the promise he had made to himself about the blonde boy, but his ever growing lusts towards Troy were clouding his judgement.
-
One Friday afternoon, as Chad was removing unopened textbooks from his locker unenthusiastically telling himself he must study over the weekend, Ryan appeared beside him in that all too familiar way.
"What's up?" he asked.
"Ryan! Oh, hi. Nothing, how bout you?" Chad asked absentmindedly as he searched his locker for anything else he might need for the weekend.
"Not much. Wanna hang out tonight?" Ryan asked eagerly.
"Sorry, dude. I can't, Troy and I are practicing at his house," Chad said.
"Oh," said Ryan, obviously disappointed.
Chad turned to Ryan to say something reassuring…his stomach squirming at the downcast look upon Ryan's face. He was just about to say something, when they were joined by another boy with floppy brown hair.
"Hey Chad!" said Troy, slapping his best friend on the back. "Hi Ryan," he added after noticing who Chad was talking to.
"Hi," said Ryan shortly, "See you later Chad."
Chad watched Ryan walk off, his back uncharacteristically slouched. And Chad still had that squirming feeling in his stomach.
All afternoon Chad was distracted. He felt terrible for neglecting Ryan. And the thing was he knew what it felt like, because only a week ago Troy had been doing the same thing to him.
But that night something happened that Chad was not expecting, and his guilty feelings about Ryan were smothered by something else.
Troy and Chad went to Troy's bedroom to watch a movie. Chad, of course, wasn't paying much attention as he was either fretting over Ryan or nervously watching Troy and despising himself for liking his best friend.
He was in a trance of self loathing when something shocked him back into a deformed reality. Something that was not meant to be happening – was. Something he never thought possible. Troy Bolton was kissing him.
He sat frozen on the bed as Troy kissed him. He wanted so badly just to melt into the kiss, but for some strange reason he found that he couldn't. He watched Troy kiss him, the other boy had his eyes closed and seemed thoroughly content with what was happening. But to Chad…it felt wrong and he didn't know why.
Finally Troy pulled away and looked into Chad's eyes. "I know you like me Chad," he whispered.
"How…how do you know?" Chad stammered in reply.
"I um…overheard you and Ryan talking about it," Troy answered uncomfortably.
"When?!" demanded Chad.
"The other day…anyway…it doesn't matter. We can be together," he said leaning in for another kiss.
But Chad pulled away. He didn't know why he couldn't kiss Troy at that moment, because he wanted to, but something was telling him not to. And that something felt a lot like the guilty feeling he had associated with Ryan.
Everything that Chad wanted had just been handed to him on a silver platter. Yet he wasn't sure that it was what he wanted anymore.
"I need to think about this," he told Troy before bolting from his room.
-
All weekend Chad ignored the calls and text messages he received from both Troy and Ryan. A week ago if Troy had kissed him the first thing he would have done (after kissing Troy back hungrily, of course) would be to tell Ryan about it. But he kept his kiss with Troy to himself. He felt like he couldn't tell Ryan about this. He wasn't sure why, but that was nothing new, he wasn't sure about a lot of things.
Again, he felt like he was all alone.
-
Chad avoided facing his problem (and Troy and Ryan) all week long, until after basketball practice on Thursday he was cornered by Troy.
"Make up your mind," he said before disappearing into the showers.
But Chad didn't make his mind up, and again he spent his whole weekend alone. He actually got some studying done
-
On Monday afternoon they had another basketball practice. Troy was waiting for Chad after he had finished his shower. He could no longer escape. He quickly got dressed, trying to cover himself with his towel, something he never had done before. However Troy sat with his back to him waiting until he was clothed, to speak.
"Chad? I really need to know," Troy said in the less demanding voice he had used on Thursday, this time his tone was more pleading. They were both standing very close to each other against the lockers.
"Why?" Chad asked, well aware that he sounded like a spoilt little child.
"I thought you wanted me?" Troy asked quietly.
"I do! I …did. I don't know!" cried Chad shrilly.
"Well, I am not waiting around forever for you to figure out if you want me or not!" Troy said indignantly, "Gabriella wants me back…and if you don't make up your mind soon, I'm going back to her."
"So you're not even gay?" Chad hissed.
"I…well…I guess I'm bi? I still like girls. But I want you more Chad…" he said, leaning in to kiss him.
"No!" Chad squeaked, pushing his best friend away. "I still don't know. Besides I don't want you if you are only half interested in me!"
"It's not like that! You know it's you I want! But I can't wait around forever. You have until seven o'clock tonight." Troy said, and again, leaned in to kiss Chad, and that time Chad accepted it.
He had to admit he was lost in that kiss. He had wanted it so badly for so long. He passionately sucked at Troy's lips, pulling the other boy's body to his own. Troy pushed Chad against the lockers. He unzipped Chad's jeans and thrust his hand down the front, running his hand over Chad's soft underwear that were still slightly damp, as Chad had neglected to dry himself properly in his haste to dress after his shower. Chad moaned at the sensation and moved his head away from Troy, exposing his neck, which Troy quickly took advantage of, sucking and biting at the flesh.
And then Troy was gone. And Chad was left leaning against the locker panting and desperately wanting more. He wondered if Troy had done that on purpose.
Chad was extremely confused by Troy's actions. He knew that if he didn't go to Troy then they would probably lose their friendship and if they got together it would either be really great…or a disaster and they would lose their friendship that way. Chad was mad at himself for ever falling for his best friend, it was probably the worst thing he could have possibly done.
But after their talk Chad realised there was a lot he didn't actually know about Troy. He would never have expected Troy to…blackmail him in that way. The pressure of the deadline made him feel nauseous. And when he thought about what Troy had said about Gabriella…that he would go back to her if Chad rejected him. He wondered if that was just to add pressure to him, or if Troy would actually do that. Chad didn't agree with that at all and wasn't sure if he wanted to be with a guy that would do that.
I wonder what Ryan would do…Ryan! Chad finally decided it was time to talk to Ryan about his dilemma.
-
Chad was in luck. He found Ryan in the auditorium. He had been helping with the set design. Ryan seemed surprised to see him, but didn't hesitate to go outside with him to talk.
Chad wondered for a minute if Ryan would be mad at him for not speaking to him in over a week. But if he was angry he didn't say anything about it and Chad was grateful. He wasn't sure if he could handle Ryan being upset with him on top of everything else.
They chose a spot to sit under a big tree. Chad spilled out everything. And Ryan listened with superb attention, the way he always did. I should have known I could rely on Ryan.
"What do you think I should do?" Chad finally asked.
"Chad! You know I can't answer that for you!" Ryan said, and Chad was quite mystified to see the pale boy blush.
"Yeah I know," Chad replied, "But…it's just so hard!" He checked his watch, "I only have two and a half hours left!"
"You deserve someone who appreciates you," Ryan said, "If you think Troy is that person, then…I guess you should go for it."
Chad thought about this for a moment. He had always thought Troy was perfect, and if Chad was ever lucky enough to have him, he would be the undeserving one. He had finally seen Troy's flaws, but that didn't mean that he didn't deserve Chad, did it? Chad, himself had many flaws.
Before he could contemplate this further, Ryan had leaned in and kissed him. Chad reacted much the same way as he had the first time Troy had kissed him, but this time he noticed Ryan also had his eyes open. Ryan was obviously as scared as he was…he wasn't as confident as Troy. Troy was comfortable with closing his eyes because, well, he was Troy Bolton he probably never opened his eyes when kissing anyone. Chad felt very close to Ryan in that moment…as he stared into those bright blue eyes.
Ryan was the first to pull away, and he whispered into Chad's ear, "You should know how I feel about you before you make your decision."
And then he was gone, and Chad's situation had become even more complex.
-
As soon as Chad had gotten home he had slumped on his bed, and had not moved an inch since. His mind had been racing the whole time.
He had wanted Troy for so long, Troy who knew so much about him. His best friend…wasn't this just meant to happen? Hadn't his prayers been answered?
And then there was Ryan. Ryan had kissed him. Ryan liked him…he supposed he should have seen that coming, but he had never been that perceptive. Had Ryan Evans really been falling for him the whole time he had been whining about Troy?
But if he had Troy it could be magical. He had already experienced how Troy could make him feel physically. And he had liked it a lot. And wasn't it just an obvious next step up from the relationship they already had?
But maybe it was Ryan who he was meant to be with? Ryan who had been right under his nose the whole time? But he still didn't actually know anything about Ryan.
But Troy… he had to seize this opportunity to be with him didn't he?
Chad glanced at his alarm clock. It was 6.34. He still had enough time. He remained staring at the ceiling for another few minutes before rising from his bed. It had been light when he had arrived home but it was now dark. Chad hadn't even noticed his room turn black over the hours because he had been so wrapped up in his thoughts. He turned on his bedroom light then proceeded to put on his shoes and jacket.
After a quick bathroom stop he left his house and started walking down the dark street. The air was quite chilly and stung his face in a refreshing way…he felt alert, and extraordinarily sure of what he was doing.
He knew. He knew what he wanted. He was walking to his house.
Chad checked his watch. 6.49.
A gust of wind swept across his face and pulled his unruly hair in several different directions. He smiled to himself and continued walking.
He reached his destination and looked up at the house. He checked his watch. 6.58.
He opened the gate and made his way up the footpath; he climbed the steps of the porch and rang the doorbell. He was surprisingly free of nerves.
Chad checked his watch. 6.59
The door opened and there stood….
To be continued….
A/N: Rating may go up in next chapter. Troy may be a little bit out of character in this fic (but come on, no-one can be that nice all the time!) I didn't do it intentionally it just turned out that way. I hope you liked it anyway!