A/N So, back somewhere around ch 70 of Crowded House, my 1000th review was posted by ForbiddenDusk. For her gift to me, I offered a gift to her...to write a one shot based on any "missing" scene from the story. She chose Jeff and Nick's reaction to Kurt pushing all the wrong buttons in his attempt to hang up the phone in Nick's car while he had a little fun with Blaine on the way home. Fortunately for Nick, Jeff knows how to push all the right buttons. For Marie Anne, and for every other kind soul who has left me a word or a novel, I appreciate that you read Crowded House and take the time to comment. :) Thank you! And I hope you enjoy!

"Jeff!" Nick hissed as quietly as possible. "Stop it! Hang up, you perv!" he grinned.

"No way in hell….I need to be able to raz the shit out of one or both of 'em, and have something in my back pocket to use as blackmail." Jeff laughed, still messing with the myriad of scarves he was ironing on Kurt's desk, using a small portable ironing board. Since Kurt was rarely in the loft, his desk was the only convenient raised, flat surface to use at the moment, and the scarves needed to be pressed and then hung for the show. "And there's no need to whisper, they can't here you, dummy!"

Clearly Kurt thought he'd hung up, but he hadn't, and Jeff muted Nick's cell phone when he supposedly "hung up" and set it on Kurt's desk between them. Nick rested his head back in Kurt's amazingly comfortable desk chair and rolled his eyes, shaking his head in amusement at his boyfriend.

"This is wrong on so many levels, Jeff!" He said softly, smiling, reminded that they couldn't hear him….but he was hearing an earful. He was beginning to feel a bit uncomfortable, actually…in his dress pants. The sounds coming from the phone, along with Jeff bending down to retrieve the scarves from the box one by one by one….well, the scenery was getting to him. Eyes still closed, he pressed the palm of his hand to his crotch and said to Jeff again, "baby…I think…just um…disconnect…ok?" He shifted in his seat again, eyes still closed.

When he felt the soft silk on his face, he sucked in a breath and smiled. It was Jeff, it had to be. They were the only ones still left in the loft, everyone else having gone home for the weekend already. Jeff, ever the overachiever, stayed behind to finish up and put things to rights after the hectic week behind them.

"Feels good, hmm?" He said, brushing the silk over Nick's jaw, draping it under his chin and fluttering the ends over his chest a little. When he tied it around Nick's eyes, he received a contented 'hmmmmmm' from him and a wicked smile.

"What're you doing?" Nick murmured.

"Playing. The soundtrack is…inspiring…yes?" Jeff said in response, trailing the ends of another scarf over Nick's arms as they rested on the arms of Kurt's office chair.

Jesus….God Almighty, Kurt, you are so fucking perfect at this…baby…so close….

"Inspiring…yes….very…." Nick murmured, his voice breathy, his palm now on his zipper again. "But it's certainly not Kurt's mouth I'm dreaming of…." He said, the breathy panting in the background making him think of things he'd really rather be doing with Jeff….even if it was right here, right now.

"Oh? You had something else in mind?" Jeff teased, wrapping the silk around the length of Nick's forearm and tying his wrist to the chair, firmly, but not too tightly.

"Jeffie…."

"Hmmm?"

gonna….nnnggghhhhh! uhhh….fuck….oh God….fuck fuck fuck….Kurt!

"Jefffff….." Nick breathed out again as Jeff tied his other arm down, his hips unable to be still now. He was a squirming mess. "You did this on purpose….you knew what it would do to me didn't- oh God…." Nick moaned, feeling Jeff straddle his lap, the blonde's knees on either side of Nick's thighs, and lean in to kiss his neck. He worked his way up to Nick's lips and played, nipping his bottom lip and then licking it to soothe. Jeff's fingers played with the buttons on Nick's shirt, popping them through the holes slowly, one at a time, kissing his way down his lover's chest as far as he could reach. Nick was full on panting now, and the evidence of his frustration was prodding at Jeff.

"Is that a banana in-"

"Do NOT even, Jeffrey…" Nick laughed.

"Not the words I thought I'd hear when I was grinding in your lap, baby." Jeff whispered in his ear.

"You know what I mean!"

"I dunno…you should be more specific, then. Clarify what you're trying to say, maybe?"

"I'm tied to a soft, comfortable chair, Jeff. I'm blindfolded, my wrists are wrapped and tied to the arms of said chair, and my delicious, sexy as hell boyfriend is straddling my lap. I am infinitely certain that I've not been this hard in a long, long time, and it's all your fault…so in conclusion, my forever love, I'm quite certain you know damn good and well what it is that I want….don't you?" Nick grinned wickedly.

"Ride or blow, baby?"

"Both, and not necessarily in that order."

"As you wish….sir."

"FUCK! Jeffie…." Nick growled as Jeff slid from his lap to the floor in front of him, his body all but hidden under Kurt's desk, his head nuzzling into Nick's crotch.

"So happy to see me, it seems…." Jeff teased, unzipping Nick's pants.

More, B….please…almost there…c'mon… Blaine….get me there…

Between the panting on the phone and the panting from above him, Jeff was so turned on he could barely function. Kurt's begging and Blaine's murmurs of love and teasing were titillating, but Nick's straining hips were sending him over the edge. When he slipped Nick out of the slit in his boxers and sucked him between his lips, he cried out with such ecstasy that Jeff nearly came in his own jeans then and there.

"Do I need to gag you, Sir?" Jeff paused to say.

"G-God, Jeff, don't tease….please…your mouth…pl—oh God….ohgod ohgod ohgod…. Jeff….not gonna last long…." Nick whined as Jeff bobbed in his lap, sucking, licking and teasing him until he thought he'd pass out. "Gonna come, Jeff…please….please don't stop…." He whined.

"No…no, baby, you're not. Not yet." Jeff told him, removing his mouth and watching Nick grimace in agony…sweet, delicious agony.

"What the hell…damn it…God, Jeff, I was RIGHT THERE!" he moaned, sad that Jeff had stopped, yet knowing his blonde bombshell was nowhere near finished.

"Oh I know you were…I've mastered the signs, babe."

Nick heard the swish of fabric and stopped fidgeting to listen. Was Jeff…was he taking his pants off? Completely off? He felt the chair dip and Jeff's skin rubbing his legs now, the boy straddling his lap once more and resting his ass on Nick's thighs.

"Hi…" he murmured softly.

"Hello, Love…" Nick whispered back. "Kiss me…." Jeff wasted no time in obliging, tasting him and nipping his lips, his jaw, his collarbone. Every little moan, every little gasp from Nick was like lightning on his skin and he was thrumming from it.

I need…w-want…yes….p-please…please…Blaine…shit…oh shitshitshit

"Baby…turn it off. I don't want to hear anymore…I want you…only you. Please…" Nick whined. Jeff reached behind him and disconnected, praying it wouldn't make a sound on the other end, but not nearly as worried about that as he was the desperate panting of the fine, fine man whose lap he was now seated on. "Ride me, baby…please…don't make me beg?"

"For my Master, anything he wishes…" Jeff teased again, leaning in to lick over Nick's bottom lip before pulling back. "Oh…well, I'm sorry, Sir, but I think it'll have to wait. It seems I don't have a condom with me any-"

"WALLET….Christ Jesus, Jeffrey, please, I'm dying here!" Nick ground out, his teeth set and his forehead beginning to sweat. He raised his butt from the chair just enough for Jeff to nudge his pants down to his knees, then reach behind and grab Nick's wallet, opening it to search out his little latex friend. The sheer number of bills peeking out from said wallet was enough to set Jeff back a pace, but when he found what he was looking for, he wasted no time. Throwing Nick's wallet down on the desk, he tore the packet open and slid the condom over Nick as if he'd done it a thousand times. Nick's strangled cry when Jeff's fist slicked the condom on was music to his ears and he raised himself up and rested back down to slip onto Nick's cock in one fluid motion.

"Sir…I hope you're ready?" he panted out, feeling so full and satisfied even just sitting there, still and content.

"Jeff…you didn't…but you're all…where'd you get lube?" Nick asked, still grinding his teeth and panting, but surprised. "No stretching or- Shit yeah…." He paused, when Jeff raised up and slid back down.

"Why waste time with that now when I could do it before you arrived?"

"Jeff….you…you knew…you planned to do this, didn't you? You little vixen…oh fuck…faster, baby…" Nick chanted as Jeff picked up his pace, begging him not to stop this time.

"I knew you were coming, I knew …oh God Nicky….. I knew I wanted you….wouldn't be able to wait to get home….wanted to please my Master…" he added with a sultry moan.

Nick went a bit wild, bucking his hips up and crying out when Jeff attached himself to his neck. He could feel Jeff's hand between them, stroking his own cock in time with his rise and fall on Nick's lap. He was in heaven and he didn't want it to ever stop…but soon he was dying to come and so, so very close.

"B-Baby…close…Jeff…'m gonna come….gonna come…don't stop, please…begging you…please…" he cried, as Jeff sped up his hand and his hips at once, slamming back onto Nick's lap as he nearly sobbed at his release inside Jeff. Jeff came across Nick's chest moments later, the man kissing him softly, slowly as they came down. Nick felt boneless and sated and Jeff was slumped on to his chest, obviously feeling the same way.

"I've clearly died and gone to heaven….and I'm in love with the man who killed me." Nick whispered out, his mouth still close to Jeff's ear as his head rested on Nick's shoulder.

"Please don't die, I still have quite a few fun little kinky things up my sleeve to try with you and I think your dying would complicate things in that regard." Jeff snickered.

"Of course…of course that's what you're worried about. Thanks for that, Jeffie." Nick huffed, laughing.

"Nobody else for me but you, Nicky. Not now, not ever. So don't leave me."

"I have absolutely no intention of leaving you, my love….none whatsoever. Especially not if you keep doing that with me…although, I think my left arm is numb now." He grinned.

"Eventually I'll be able to feel my lower half again and I'll move and untie you. Give me a minute?" Jeff mumbled, his head buried in Nick's neck.

"Take as long as you need, Love. I'm in no hurry to not be inside you. There's nowhere more perfect for me, and I'm quite content right here."

"We can't ever tell Kurt that we defiled his chair. He'll turn into a royal diva bitch and get rid of it." Jeff laughed out loud. "Then again, maybe I should tell him. I like this chair. It fits both of us perfectly, don't you think? I could just steal it when he ditches it…."

"Mmmmhmmmm….perfectly. Expensive, soft, supple leather, cushiony seat, and it's a little springy, so when you bounce on me-" Nick began, with a smile.

"OK, ok, I get it. You like the chair." Jeff said, blushing at the thought of bouncing on Nick's lap.

"I like you better than the chair. You're infinitely more handsome, softer, smarter, the chair doesn't have hands to hold me or a heart to keep me in…safely, forever….and I can't possibly love a chair the way I love you. No chair I've ever owned has made my heart race by merely being there, and I've never looked forward to sleep because I knew a chair would be waiting for me, warm, soft and pliant…in my arms."

If he hadn't been blindfolded, he'd have seen the immense love on Jeff's face. He'd have also seen the tears filling his boyfriend's eyes, ready to spill over at any moment. He'd have seen the grin on Jeff's face and every ounce of happiness within him shining out like a light as he sat, motionless, on Nick's thighs. As it was, all her heard was the sniff and the little sob.

"Baby?"

"Shhh, 's ok…you just…damn it, Nicky."

"I love you, Pretty Boy."

"Love you too, Nicky…so much. Even more than the chair."