Puddlemere United's Anthem

by The Illustrious Crackpot

Anyone who has read Quidditch Through the Ages recognizes the name of the song Beat Back Those Bludgers, Boys, and Chuck That Quaffle Here, but after years of sneaking into World Cup games I can finally bring you the lyrics!

Puddlemere United's Anthem

("Beat Back Those Bludgers, Boys, And Chuck That Quaffle Here")

copiously copied down by The Illustrious Crackpot

Tune is similar to that of a drinking song

Beat back those Bludgers, boys, and chuck that Quaffle here

We'll get the Golden Snitch again and spread a lot of fear

Beat back those Bludgers, boys, and toss that Quaffle down

Just listen to that crowd cheer, that wonderful sound

I was walkin' down the pitch one night and I thought I heard a noise

I spun around, my wand in hand, but it were just my boys

We settled down for a bit o' brew, oh what would be the harm

When me wife came down and caught me here, and Transfigured m'arm.

I tried explainin' my purpose, but she turned my pleas deaf ears

The lovin' way I talk about Quidditch, she might've Vanished m'rear.

OH beat back those Bludgers, boys, and chuck that Quaffle here

We'll get the Golden Snitch again and spread a lot of fear

Beat back those Bludgers, boys, and toss that Quaffle down

Just listen to that crowd cheer, that wonderful sound

The wind whistlin' off m'broomstick and turnin' in the air

When that Quaffle comes my way then I will get my share

I'll pummel the Keeper, dodge the Beaters, makin' lotsa hell

'Till the referee blows at me aaaaand begins to yell.

I'll pull the punches, score the goals

So long's my head's not fulla' holes

C'MON beat back those Bludgers, boys, and chuck that Quaffle here

We'll get the Golden Snitch again and spread a lot of fear

Beat back those Bludgers, boys, and toss that Quaffle down

Just listen to that crowd cheer, that wonderful sound

Whoops, the season's over and the game is done

But our very favorite teammates all been havin' lots of fun

But none of us are finished, yeah, that cliff sure is sheer

We're ready for another year, be-cause-we'll

Beat back those Bludgers, boys, and chuck that Quaffle here

We'll get the Golden Snitch again and spread a lot of fear

Beat back those Bludgers, boys, and toss that Quaffle down

Just listen to that crowd cheer, that wonderful sound

Beat back those Bludgers, boys, and chuck-that-Qua-ffle HEEEEEEEEEEEERE!