Title: Trying to have a life together
Author: Loz
E-Mail: loz06(at)yahoo(dot)com
Rating: T
Category: Neil/Andrea…All Neil/Andrea
Series: Story number fourteen. What follows are titles and story ID numbers:
(1) After he's at her door – 2486705
(2) When the mighty fall – 2506192
(3) While his wife's away – 2525486
(4) While they're away – 2543010
(5) When love's not working – 2543013
(6) Boundaries when broken up - 2562611
(7) What happens on the train – 2579012
(8) When they work together – 2595808
(9) When she wants him back – 2598312
(10) When they're stuck together – 2611364
(11) When they're back together – 2619492
(12) Life almost in balance – 2630121
(13) Life under pressure – 2666280
(14) Trying to have a life together - 2699235
Spoilers: So minor it shouldn't ruffle any feathers.
Archive (if applicable): www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net.
Feedback: The good, the bad and the very ugly it's all appreciated.
Summary: Andrea looks for something she and Neil can share as a couple while Bruce continues to place pressure on her sending Andrea to Neil for comfort.
Authors' notes: OMG I'm back online. FINALLY! Can't believe how much I've missed having internet access and now I have broadband, no more waiting and waiting and waiting with dial-up. Yay! Anyway going to post as fast as my hands can type. Thanks everyone for hanging in there the last few months, hang on I can hear an echo out there, maybe there's no one left.
Thanks: So many cheers and big thanks for Lornz, Fabio, Gem6, madz87, Storm Wolf 3000, aerialplug and Chelsee6 for leaving a review and anyone else who read the last part and loved it or hated it!
Disclaimers: Status quo. I haven't been running madly around buying up The Bill while I've been gone. Still not mine.
Their coats are taken at the front and they follow the waiter through the tables that are arranged in a horseshoe fashion around a small dance floor – the band is just instruments for the moment. Their table is small but intimate; a dull light above them provides less light than the candle that flickers in front of them. The waiter pushes Andrea's chair in once she's sitting down and Neil orders wine.
"I hope white is alright?" Neil says getting the conversation going.
"Fine," Andrea says softly glancing at the wooden dance floor.
"So policing, was it your first choice?" Neil smiles knowing its information they've already exchanged, the game continues. It isn't lost on Andrea that she's lied in her answer to this question.
"It was." She notices the wine approach.
"And for you?"
"Never wanted to do anything else," he watches as their glasses are filled. "What do you like about it?"
"Helping people, the people you work with, the status that comes from the job, the flexibility of hours and holidays." Andrea thanks the waiter once her glass is full. "What about you?"
"The same," Neil says picking up his glass. There's no toast, just a chinking of glasses but they both know their relationship is the subject of the toast.
"So how long have you been in London?"
Andrea folds the napkin that rested on her lap during the meal and places it next to her plate. For the moment she's alone, Neil having excused himself to the men's, she smiles and thanks the waiter as he clears their plates. Their conversation had steered itself from known information eventually and Andrea had enjoyed the fast service and quite nature of the space. Although the restaurant is full it is though each table has an invisible sound proof barrier.
The band had appeared during dessert, their soft cabaret notes sliding down just as easily as her strawberries. Andrea watches four couples on the floor dancing, each moving to their own beat despite there being only one song.
"Dance with me?" She turns to see Neil with his hand out, ready to lead her to the floor. She doesn't need to think about it.
They fall with ease into the waltz hold, Andrea looks out to where their hands are clasped realising this is the first time they've touched tonight and she's missed it. They don't even get through the first song before they've blocked out the rest of the world, her hand resting on his heart, his over it and their other arms across each others back.
"This was a great idea." She falls out of character and feels him smile against her cheek, pressing the briefest of kisses against it.
"We never have gone out on a proper date." She loses count of the number of songs they remain like this for, stepping to their own beat in their own little space on the floor.
Only when her feet protest stronger does she reluctantly pull away from him. "Don't go away." She whispers noticing for the first time the dance floor has filled.
Andrea realises her feet from the strappy shoes and places them under her chair, across the room she sees their waiter smile. Neil stands the odd one out on the dance floor smiling as well.
"Don't suddenly develop two left feet." She says standing on her toes to kiss him. Secure back in his arms again, this time she rests her head where his collar meets his neck – she could stay there forever concentrating on his arms around her, she doesn't even notice the floor underneath her bare feet. Only when he asks her does she want to go that she moves.
Neil pulls her closer with an arm around her shoulder once they're outside trying to chase away the cold. He opens the car door for her, closing it once her coat is tucked out of the way. He finds her hand in the darkness as they head back to her flat.
At the door Andrea fumbles for her keys looking at her shoes. "I had a really lovely time tonight."
"So did I, maybe we could do it again sometime." Their game is back on.
"Would you like to come in for coffee?" Andrea purposely rushes the words past her lips as though she's nervous about asking him inside. Her heart sinks as he starts laughing like her words were the joke of the day.
"I hope that's a euphemism for something because I've had my share of bad coffee this week." The game is off and Andrea pushes him into the wall, where he lands with a thump, the second assault comes from her lips – this one he doesn't mind so much. She kisses him hard almost as if there's something to prove, he matches her, not concerned about the public nature of the stairwell, she releases him to catch her breath.
"Do you think I'm willing to be awake for half the night because of some lousy coffee?" Andrea says against his lips.
"I can't stay all night." She expected this, it's Saturday and his family are home. It doesn't stop her increasing the intensity of the kiss.
"We're wasting time."
The shower running wakes her, struggling she lifts her head to look at the clock, ten to two, she doesn't need to pat the other side of the bed. Weak and unstable on her feet she pushes open the shower door. His hair isn't wet and she hates that, it means he's washing away any trace of her and wet hair would raise questions when he gets home.
"Your pick up lines need some work." She lets the door close and rubs her eyes still fused together with sleep.
"They worked on you." There's a laugh in his voice and the water shuts off. Andrea holds a towel out for him, avoiding her reflection in the mirror. "I've never needed a line." He steps out with the towel wrapped lightly around his waist.
"That's fairly arrogant." She yawns.
"Not what I meant, I've been lucky." He smoothes some of her hair down and kisses her forehead. "You should go back to bed, I'll come and kiss you goodbye."
She's asleep by the time he leaves.
It's his left leg that wakes him, not Philippa shaking his shoulders or calling his name. The left leg that is tucked under his right on the chair is asleep, numb, circulation has been restricted. He winces with the pins and needle feeling that invades the leg as he moves it. It turns almost painful as he walks delicately; trying to stimulate circulation, in front of him Philippa switches off the TV and picks up the glass with a fine film of whiskey in the bottom.
As the life blood drains back into his leg, the million pins stop poking into his skin and his brain focuses on more pressing matters. He knows he can't keep doing this, using the same excuse – coming home from 'work', turning on the TV to 'relax' and ending up falling asleep. It won't be long before Philippa becomes suspicious, he might think he has every intention of coming to bed but deep down he knows the reason he can't climb into his marital bed after being with Andrea is guilt. He takes small comfort knowing he is a one woman man after all, he knows the women in his life will take none.
"What time did you get in?" He notices for the first time what she's wearing; clearly she's not spending the day at home.
"Just after two." He rubs his face awake knowing it's not a total lie.
"I need you to pick up Colin from the McPhee's." Philippa says as she takes the glass into the kitchen.
"Where are you going?" He asks though he already knows the answer.
"I have work that needs to be done for court on Monday." Her voice is normal as though she doesn't expect the fight she's about to get.
"This is ridiculous." Neil vents his anger and frustration. They've had this conversation before and she seems to be impervious to his requests to slow up on the work.
"No, it's unfair that's what it is, I didn't comment when you worked all yesterday and last night, I was here and now I need to work."
"You didn't have Saturday off, your office…our office is stacked with work, and did you do anything with Colin?" His tone is accusing.
"He was at the McPhee's." Philippa refuses to be drawn in, keeping her tone even.
"Right, he probably doesn't remember what you look like; there was a stranger in the house." He's not proud of himself but he can't help the sarcasm.
"That's the pot calling the kettle black; you did sixty five hours this week." The last comment has Philippa to rising to defend herself. In truth about twenty of those were spent with Andrea.
"Who's counting, you did eighty and I was here three out of five days when Colin got home from school and a half a day both Saturday and Sunday." It had been a good week for his relationship with Colin, they had time alone and Neil felt he was chipping away at the remaining barriers his son had erected. They'd eaten out, talked but for Neil the breakthrough would come with an invitation to his sons football match.
"Well I'm so happy you can pass on some of your load to the people under you but I have people relying on me. Sometimes it's the difference between freedom and punishment." Philippa busies herself unstacking the dishwasher but Neil knows it's just a tactic so she doesn't have to look at him.
"You think the MET doesn't like my department to solve crimes? If for no one else than the victims, I've got to report, analyse, justify and explain and we rely on you too, your family."
"What do you rely on me for Neil? You can't even come to bed of a night. Can't bring yourself to lie next to me." Finally she scores a point and Neil is punched with her words and his guilt.
"Colin is going to be gone soon and he won't come back at this rate." Neil tries to drive his guilt back onto Philippa.
"I can't do this now; this work has to be done." Her voice drops to sound distracted. Neil follows her as she gathers her keys and work from the table.
"We're doing it now! We're in the middle of it. When Philippa? Pencil me in some time please."
"Don't get all high and mighty father-of-the-year with me Neil. You're just as much to blame as I am." Her words drip with venom as though she can't stand the sight of him.
"Who is he?" As soon as the words escape his mouth Neil regrets it. Bringing up the subject only puts the spotlight on him.
"I won't dignify that." Fittingly the door slams behind her.
After she's gone he asks himself why he pushes the issue, other than for Colin's sake. He's not so stupid to realise Philippa's hours allow him the flexibility to see Andrea without having to come up with a new excuse each time he comes home.
He questions whether his pushing is because her hours are a wedge that would come between them and be used as a catalyst for divorce, keeping his affair out of it.
He wants to throw Colin's words, about it better with them apart, at her as an I-told-you-so. Neil knows it wouldn't help and the last thing he really wants to do is use his son as a pawn in his fight with Philippa.
Checking his wallet for cash, he decides to do something with Colin tonight instead of letting them retire to their respective corners when he gets home.
Andrea's phone snaps shut after she finishes the call, smiling she strides confidently into CID much too pleased with herself to let anyone or anything bring her down, that is till she raises her arm to knock on his office door.
She doesn't see Jack Meadows going almost toe to toe with Neil as she cruised through the outer offices. She backs off but not before she captures Neil's attention, part of her supposes he was looking for any means of escape from the argument.
That less than a second she held his attention distracts the DCI who casts angry eyes over Andrea.
"We'll discuss it later." He paces past Andrea, a tiny 'sir' escapes her mouth but it's lost in the anger that radiates from him.
Neil looks up from the top of his desk; not disguising how glad he is to see her, she closes the door carefully behind her and turns to find him almost on top of her. He kisses her softly and sweetly, stepping her against the door, his thumbs stroking her cheeks, his other fingers behind her ears. Andrea does the same noticing he looks tired.
"Let's run away." For a moment she's concerned because there's more than an ounce of seriousness in his voice.
"Bad day?"
"Meadows."
"Enough said." Andrea sighs looking at him like a mother would to say 'what am I going to do with you?'
He kisses her one last time and reluctantly sits back in his chair knowing too long behind the door will arouse suspicion.
"What are you doing Sunday?" The brilliant smile returns as she settles in the guest seat.
Intrigued he smiles and says, "nothing."
"Dress neat casual, collared shirt and long pants, my place at six am." It's all the detail she's willing to give.
"Six am!"
"Well maybe you could stay Saturday night?" He smiles for a moment only to have it fade.
"I promised Colin we'd go out after his game – it's a night match." There's disappointment in his voice but Andrea would never dare ask him to give it up. Nor can she stop him as he fills her in on the progress he's perceived he's made with Colin.
"I'm glad things are better." She smiles genuinely, leaning forward for a moment to cover his hand with her in a show of support.
"You could pick me up at mine." It's not the first time he's broached such an idea and sometimes she has similar fantasies. "Six am."
A part of her would rather sit and watch him work, but she loves her job and pushes herself out of the chair, not noticing him before he stops her from opening the door.
"You're so good to me." His arms slip easily around her.
"It's because I love you." She kisses him quickly and disappears behind the office door.