Author Notes Of Awesomeness: Owo Another story! Isn't that awesome? -does the Friendly Mushroom wave-. Okay, the background on the story o.O. Gather 'round, ladies and dudes.
Normally, when I'm doing a story, I do it all at once so I can carry out the same feeling, although this one had to be divided. I am hoping, however, that despite the fact I had to split up my time, I made it blend in pretty good, and that I capture a sort of theme behind the story. Her life was perfect...but once all those instabilites came pouring out, I thought her flaws the most beautiful, and that she's captured between thinking she's better off and being at her most saddest. (Owo That is just how I feel, not the theme. The theme is for you to find, or make up, if you would like). And now...I hope you enjoy, and that I did my best to give that bit of a kick in your pants!
I think I'm doing just fine,
Here, on my own
Although I'm always watching
The bite slowly start to show.
"My own mother...thought I was a monster." -Azula
"Schizophrenia?"
A professional conversation was held between two doctors as they combed carefully over the patient's list. Their words were muffled behind the door they stood in front of, and every shift they made between them had almost snuffed out the rest of the dialogue. But hearing what they had to say held little importance to the former princess inside.
Into the room lay nothing but a bed and a lonely window that allowed little amounts of sunshine to enter. The white paint was meticulous; almost perfect. With nothing else to accommodate it, the place held a somber and quiet feeling to it, although it was told that white calmed the spirit.
The stark color of the place was anything but calm. Seeing so much white made the former princess' insides curl into disgust. Were they really planning on treating someone of such high royalty this way? To be tempered in some cramped, empty space?
She would not have it so.
One of the doctors outside scooted closer to the door, their words becoming more clear.
"She's been seeing hallucinations?"
"Her brother reported she has been before her defeat."
She snorted and curled her lips into a scowl. Hallucinating? Azula was most certainly not hallucinating, of all things. Those visits she received were all very much real. And in all of those visits, they had all tried to get under her skin. Despite all of their attempts, however, they had failed to even scratch the surface.
How could a bunch of fools and traitors even think they bothered her? She was perfectly fine, and she most certainly didn't need any of them.
"I love Zuko more than I fear you."
The conversation beyond the walls became the one that started to play out in her mind once more as footsteps grew faint. Words faded and blended, slowly beginning to mix in. Her once relaxed position tensed and her eyes quickly shifted into a narrow glare. Her hands clenched onto the lining of the bed, sharp fingernails tearing though the sheets.
"Then you didn't fear me enough!" She shouted, snorting out smoke. It was unfathomable. Her own friend…her assistant in her entourage, her close ally…having choosing her brother over herself? Clearly she had lost her touch. Her grip on Mai wasn't strong enough to keep her under control.
And then Ty Lee…
"Come on Mai, let's get out of here!"
Oh, how dare she. How dare she use those clever fingers against Azula, of all people. It was her doing that she got her ever-smiling [former] friend out of that lowly circus. She gave them both meaning to just exist, and that was how she was repaid?
They were her friends…
"You're both fools!" She once more shouted. "I hope you rot!" The shouting became screeching, and she suddenly threw herself back and hissed at the reflection of the tiles on the floor. Tired golden-copper irises wearily looked beyond. The doctors and nurses were careful to keep away any reflective surfaces, but they had not counted on the floor to prove any more dangerous than a mirror or a window.
Although it was near impossible to see because of the heavy distortion, the former princess could make out a lone image of herself. Long raven tresses tangled into themselves as her used-to-be trademark bangs hung somberly on either side.
Her hair was the only stunning contrast to such a void room.
Beneath all of the strands lay a set of eyes that were underlined by darkening grey circles. There was another contrast between the baggy accents from her lack of sleep, and her naturally pale skin, before there was nothing else worth pointing out [Minus the already white nightgown]. All she could see was something feral, and could not reconcile that it was her very own reflection.
After a while, the image before her had turned into her father.
He was no more traitor than Mai or Ty Lee.
"I've decided to head out to Ba Sing Se…alone."
The last she had heard, the Avatar had defeated him and he was stripped of his Firebending, locked away in a grave cell.
'That's good.' She dismissed. 'He can rot, too.' He deserved it. Even her father, the one who praised her and groomed her to perfection, had turned against her after she had already suffered betrayal. The more she thought on it, the more angrier she became. He stood there, perfectly still, all eyes on her. She stared him down, though, waiting for him to go away, secretly hoping that he would become nothing but bones in his prison.
"You're a disgrace to the Fire Nation."
"Disgrace!?" She exclaimed. The very nature of the comment had disturbed her on the deepest level. To be rendered a failure by the only person that had chosen her over her brother…
But what did he know? It didn't even matter, now. He was far worse off than she was. She was supplied with better food and even a better bed than he. He was the true failure. He was just one more mock upon her list. With a strong, ferocious blast of her trademark blue flames, the former princess had eradicated the pestering, leaving a black scorch mark and wavering embers upon the once perfectly polished tiles.
It was a shame how they all thought they could try and bother her. Did they not realize they meant nothing to her? Azula had never even needed them. They were only there as steps that she could use to walk all over to get to the top. Even with their treachery, she still didn't need them. Why, they probably only turned against her because they were more afraid then she realized. Her grip was so tight they ran away with their tails between their legs.
The thought brought a darkly wicked smirk upon her lips.
"What a shame…you always had such beautiful hair."
The pleased smirk twisted into a deep scowl as the echo of the voice reverberated in her head. Once the reflection of her mother appeared, she quickly looked away, concentrating her glare at the wall.
"What do you want this time?"
"I wanted to be here for my daughter."
The corner of her eye caught a smile. "Don't smile at me!" She turned to face the reflection, snarling. The corner of the vision's lips turned into a small frown.
The former princess waited tensely for her unwanted visitor to disappear. When it was clear that she had no intention of moving, she shot her wild blue flames at the image, grinning madly. Once the smoke had cleared, however, the reflection was still as clear as could be, despite the large black smudge.
She sent another unfocused attack, hoping it would do her visitor in. The reflection remained undaunted, a small frown still etched into her features.
"Why are you here!?" Azula demanded, huffing impatiently. She was not about to let her mother, of all people, make even one inch into her skin.
"I wanted to tell you that…"
"NO!" The former princess screeched, shooting as much fire as she could at the floor. The reflection was completely obscured, but the words prepared to come out of her mouth were nothing of the unimaginable. Even though she couldn't see her mother anymore, she could still hear the echo of her voice. Tears started to crawl bitterly down as she dragged helplessly on her bed, body twisting forward toward her knees while gasping for air in between the sobs.
All of those traitors…all of those fools…they were never crawling.
They only had to bite to break her skin.
Ending Notes Of Awesomesauce: O.o If you are reading this, then you are awesome and win a FxoxF cookie because you read it!...or cheated, I can't tell. Owo I hope you read, though, because I hope to give back to this wonderful community of fanfiction-based writers that have given me the opportunity to grow, even if just a little each time.
O.o. Every time you review, you save a clicking finger's life. Think of all those clicking fingers that lose their purpose because they aren't clicking enough. Please, think of the clicking fingers. Positive reviewing and helpful advice nom out typo fairies (and are always appreciated). Enjoy the rest of your day and peace out!