On the day Renji died, Genichirou finds a cat outside his front door.
Genichirou opens the door. The cat allows himself inside and takes up residence.
Genichirou wakes up in the morning, gets off the bed, pads out of his room and sees a cat curled up on his sofa. "Mrrrw?" His head rears up at the sound of footsteps, then he stands, stretching his legs.
"Ah," Genichirou says, "I should find you something to eat."
The cat hops off the sofa and walks beside him to the kitchen. Genichirou goes through his cupboards, finding rice, instant miso soup, seaweed, cans of corn. He goes to his fridge then and pulls out a fillet of fish.
He makes a call to Seiichi and puts it on speaker phone.
"Poach it and let it cool first," Seiichi tells Genichirou. "What kind of cat is it? A moggy?"
"I don't know. I guess so." Genichirou puts the fish on the hob. "It turned up last night."
"Oh," says Seiichi in understanding. "You're keeping it?"
"It's a cat. Cats do what they want, don't they?" Genichirou looks down at the cat. The cat looks up at him.
"That's true." Seiichi pauses. They listen to each other's breathing for a moment. "I'll pick you up in an hour."
"Okay."
When the fish is done, Genichirou puts it on a plate and points a fan at it. "Don't eat it yet," he tells the cat, though not knowing if he will be listened to, and goes to get changed. He has had the yellow Rikkai high school tennis outfit ready for the past few weeks; it was Renji's request that his old friends from the tennis club show up as a team. The trousers aren't really long enough now; they hang just above Genichirou's ankles. But the shirt and jersey still fit, and it isn't too cold to wear shorts.
Genichirou checks himself in the mirror. He puts on the black baseball cap, too.
The cat is on a windowsill, looking out when Genichirou returns. He puts the back of a finger on the fish, decides it is cool enough and sets the plate on the floor. The cat helps himself to the food as Genichirou fills a rice bowl with water and puts it beside the fish. The cat purrs as he eats. Genichirou finds himself smiling.
A while later, he hears Seiichi's car pulling up on the drive. He checks himself again and leaves the house.
The cat follows.
Seiichi steps out of his car. "That's the cat?" He crouches down and the cat walks over to him, allowing the man to pet him on the head. "You have Renji's expression, little one."
Genichirou is glad he isn't the only one who feels that way. "He followed me out." He picks the cat up, goes back to the house and puts him down.
The cat is beside his feet again before he can shut the door.
"Perhaps he just wants out," says Seiichi. "Let's go; we don't want to be late."
The cat follows Genichirou inside the car, then jumps to the back seats.
Genichirou and Seiichi both become silent.
Then, Seiichi takes a deep breath, turns around, studies the animal.
Finally, he smiles. "Shall we go?"
The cat sits down.
Everyone brightens up when they see the cat. Suddenly it doesn't feel like a funeral anymore. Renji's mother smiles through her tears. Akaya laughs when the feline climbs onto his shoulders and not the chanting of the Buddhist monks nor Genichirou's "tarundoru" can make him quiet down.
The family stays behind for the cremation and the friends depart, as that is something private for the family. They feel less of a sadness - Yanagi had had the time to do everything he wanted to and enjoy life before the inevitable - but more of an emptiness, one that is now replaced by a strange curiosity.
"So." Niou scratches the back of his head. "Let's get a bag to hide Yanagi in, then go for yakiniku?"
Several hours of DIY is all that is needed to install a cat-flap on the front door and make home cat-safe. Jackal said cats usually prefer to use the window, but Genichirou has decided he isn't going to always leave the window open and Renji could be caught out in the rain.
Jackal also taught him a lot of other things, such as what cats can eat ("cooked eggs are actually okay,") and not eat ("don't give him milk!"). He also reminded Genichirou that Renji will need to see the vet.
Genichirou has been putting off that vet visit, in case the vet tells him Renji is a girl or finds a microchip in Renji's neck that says he is actually somebody's pet. But two weeks go by and Renji is still here, often dozing off under the setting sun while curled up on one end of the sofa, or sitting in front of the window, long tail wrapped around himself and his front paws together, when Genichirou comes home from work. Occasionally he may spot Renji up one of the trees near home and on those days Renji doesn't come inside until late. But he always comes back. Eventually, Genichirou overcomes his fears and takes Renji to the vet.
He tells the vet Renji used to be a stray. The vet checks him over, doesn't find any microchip and says he is in great condition and has no fleas, rare for a stray. She administers the standard shots and asks if Genichirou wants his cat neutered. Horrified by the idea, Genichirou loses his words and doesn't reply straight away.
"Male cats are quite territorial. Obviously there are the hormones, too. Neutering would reduce the mess he might create."
Renji sits prettily on the vet's metal table, seemingly calm and unaware what is going on, but Genichirou somehow feels tension in the air. Is it just his imagination?
"The operation is very very simple." The vet reaches for Renji. "With an incision-"
Hearing that word, Genichirou feels his blood cool. He picks up Renji and holds him close. "Uh, no. No. He's fine as he is."
After the check-up, Genichirou goes back to his car, putting Renji in the front passenger seat.
"Tarundoru."
"Meow."
"I saw Renji on the way back home." There are small sounds of purring coming through the phone. "And took him back with me. Do you want to come and pick him up? And dinner with me?"
Seiichi lives just two doors down, so it isn't strange that Renji happens to be there. Genichirou agrees to drop by.
Seiichi's cooking is much like Genichirou's: passable, with the occasional decent surprise or disaster. Tonight's dinner is the former and Renji seems happy with his canned tuna, too.
"I call this a success. Renji clearly knows my heart."
"Hmm?" Genichirou doesn't understand.
"You haven't come by for months. I was going to kidnap your Renji if that's what it takes to make you come over."
"Ah... that... sorry. I've just been wanting to have some time to myself."
"It's fine. As long as it isn't something I've done." Seiichi smiles, vacates his seat and starts to clear the dishes. Genichirou helps. "I get like that too, sometimes. I just don't have a cat to brood with."
The cat stands by Seiichi's leg and rubs it with his body. Seiichi puts the dishes down, wipes his hands and crouches down to tickle Renji on the head. "I still want to kidnap you."
"Meow. Meow."
"You want to keep him...?"
"Cats choose their owners." Seiichi picks Renji up and holds him so that Renji can drape his front arms over a shoulder. "And he's chosen you, I'm pretty certain."
Renji looks comfortable and happy at his current position.
"That's the thing I don't understand."
"What?"
"Why he chose me. He could have easily come here instead, for example."
"It's not that strange I think? If I were a cat I'd go live with you. I mean..." Seiichi's eyes shift. He looks embarrassed about what he has just said. "You installed cat-flaps and everything for him, you never forget to feed him..."
"That's after he came. He shouldn't have known that beforehand."
Seiichi shrugs and edges past Genichirou to leave the kitchen. "It's just one of those inexplicable things, I guess." He turns to the cat flopped on his shoulder. "But I think I'm going to get a cat-flap too, so you can drop by whenever you want."
Genichirou puts a hand in his pocket. He has had something ready since a long time ago. "You're welcome to come and visit whenever you want, too." He pulls out a set of keys, holds them in front of Seiichi, a plastic keyring dangling from a small chain.
Seiichi accepts the keys with a smile. "Okay."
Renji finds the penguin keyring fascinating.
Renji hunts. At weekends, when Genichirou stays home to read, he sometimes sees Renji in the garden, chasing something. Then he would run up a tree and jump from branch to branch, elegant and athletic. Every now and then Genichirou catches a glimpse of other cats in the neighbourhood Renji seems to hang out with, one of them a tortoiseshell, which, according to Genichirou's All About Cats book, is definitely a female.
He tells Seiichi this.
"He's got a lady friend?" The smile in Seiichi's voice is very obvious. "Then he's doing better than either of us."
Genichirou looks out to the garden, where Renji is almost flattened on the ground, staying very still, eyes trained on an unsuspecting bird. Renji isn't going to hurt the bird; this is more like a game to him.
"Say, Seiichi, do you want to go fishing on Saturday?"
For the trip, Genichirou checks his fishing rod, makes sure his brother isn't going to suddenly want to borrow his car, and, after some thought, buys one of those pet carriers that can be strapped to the car with the seatbelt; Renji travels well in the car but Genichirou feels not giving him the safety protection is irresponsible. Some time ago Akaya had already given him a carrier for Renji that looks like an ordinary shoulder bag, and he packs that, too.
Some people take their dogs out, surely it can't be weird that he takes the cat.
Renji doesn't seem to have an opinion when Genichirou tells him they are going on a trip. But everyone likes to be with Seiichi so there won't be a problem. And the cat loves it when Seiichi strokes him.
Sitting on the sofa watching a documentary on Antartica animals, Genichirou suddenly realises he has never stroked Renji's fur. He has carried him when necessary, but not stroked him like someone normally would stroke a cat.
He looks at Renji, who is curled up beside him, half asleep. The cat opens his eyes wide and the ears stand tall when Genichirou holds his hand near, stopping mid-air.
"Um." How does one initiate this? "Is it okay if.... may I?"
"Mrrw!"
The cat stands, arches his back and stretches. He pushes himself up to brush his cheek on Genichirou's hand, purring.
Renji's fur is thick and soft and feels lovely to the hand.
"You what?"
The journey to the lake takes one and a half hours by car, and then half an hour on foot. They take just their fishing kits and let Renji walk on his own. Renji isn't a dog that would respond to the owner calling him back, but somehow Genichirou knows it's going to be all right.
"It didn't feel right to just touch him without asking. Even if he's a cat."
Seiichi stares at Genichirou disbelievingly, but laughs and shakes his head after a while. "That's definitely something you'd do, yes," he says. "Actually..." he smiles, "you're right. People shouldn't assume things; Renji doesn't necessarily have to enjoy being touched just because he's a cat. He deserves respect, too, and should be given a choice."
Genichirou frowns a little. "Now you're dissecting this too much."
"I think," Seiichi ignores the statement, "this is one of your good traits. You respect. You never assume and you don't take anything for granted."
Muttering something under his breath, Genichirou looks away and then announces they are almost at the lake.
They put their things down, set up the fishing rods and keep them in place with small piles of strategically-placed stones. Renji shows up a while later looking a bit dusty, then wanders off again as if he only came to confirm their location.
The surface of the lake is very still; it's a windless day. The lines from the rods are barely moving, no leaves falling from the evergreen they're sitting under. Everything is still. Genichirou feels calmness washing over him, something Renji liked to call "inner peace".
"Late last year, I had a very long conversation with Renji," Genichirou says, and Seiichi shifts his gaze from the water to his companion, "about a lot of things, but mostly about respect. And choice.
"He taught me so much. You say I don't assume, but he made so much fun of me because of the things I thought and what I assumed must be true. He told me if I don't know something with complete certainty, then I should ask questions. And if something has half a chance of success, then it's worth going for it."
"Oh, Renji." Seiichi chuckled, shaking his head.
"At the time, I assumed something in my mind. And he made me realise that by assuming something about... well, you, I wasn't respecting you or giving you the choice you deserve."
Brows furrowing, Seiichi shifts so that he faces Genichirou.
Words are getting more difficult. Genichirou thinks about Renji's advice, and his gentle laughter, and his understanding smile when Genichirou said he didn't feel he was ready yet. Renji told him some things couldn't be rushed; patience brought the maturity and insight needed for big decisions.
Genichirou tries to remember the calm that being with Renji always brought, but feels something brush against his knee instead.
"Meow." The cat looks up at Genichirou for a moment, then finds a comfortable place - Genichirou's folded jacket - to lie down on, purring to himself.
Genichirou feels his heartbeat slowing again. Now he is ready.
"What I want to ask you is: would you go out with me?"
Long seconds pass before Seiichi speaks. "What was your assumption?"
"That you would say no."
"Thank God for Renji." A smile breaks on Seiichi's face. "Otherwise I wouldn't have the chance to say yes."
They go home having only caught one small fish (Renji's dinner, they have decided), but Genichirou feels he has won the world.
This feeling strengthens when one day, he sees Seiichi asleep and Renji curled up beside him, both of them snoring gently.
At work, over plastic bento boxes and during a conversation that evolves from the Nikkei to house pets, Genichirou mentions that he has a cat.
"Really? You don't look like the cat type."
Genichirou doesn't answer.
"Have you heard the saying that people choose dogs, but cats choose people?"
Genichirou thinks about Renji, and knows the saying is true.
-end-