Chapter One

The Worst Wedding

"So, Moony, anyone caught your eye?" a slightly tipsy Sirius Black asked as he sat down on the chair next to his good friend, putting an arm around the man's shoulders. He took a gulp of his drink and placed the glass on the table. "There's a pretty little blonde over there," he said, nodding towards the corner of the small tent. "The bird she's talking to isn't bad looking either. You never know, you might get both if you're lucky," he winked, grinning at his friend.

Remus rolled his eyes and shook his head, only half listening to what Sirius was saying until the need to flirt with the two women became uncontrollable and off he went. He hadn't really paid much attention to what anyone had been saying all day. Of course Remus was over the moon for James and Lily for finally getting married; it was so clear how much they loved each other and they were perfect for one another. The ceremony was grand, as everyone had anticipated, but the sandy haired young man couldn't help but hope the reception flew by. Seeing two of his friends so happy and in love just brought back so many memories he didn't want to think about. So many memories that pained him. He had tried to move on, tried to get on with his life and think about the present and what was happening in the world, but even after all this time Remus still found it difficult to stop his mind wandering to her. He missed her. He missed her laugh. Her laugh always made him smile. It was so beautiful how her head fell back and her shoulders shook as she let out the melodic sound. Just thinking about it made him want to both laugh and cry himself. He missed her terribly. He missed how her whole face lit up whenever she smiled, he missed the small furrow in her brow that appeared when she concentrated, he missed her crazy hair and how the curls always tickled his face whenever they hugged. He missed Ophelia Turner. Even the name made his stomach twist with a handful of emotions: anger, grief, confusion… But most of all, love.

It had been two years since Remus had seen Ophelia and yet he still found it hard to deal with her absence. He had known something was wrong when she hadn't replied to any of his letters. His suspicion that something had happened grew when his father called him down to the kitchen a couple of days later. His mother had looked as though she'd been crying just moments before he walked into the room, and his father had been unable to look him in the eye. That was when he knew something had happened. Something had happened to Ophelia. Lyall had tried his best to explain to his son what had happened but couldn't bring himself to do it. Instead, he'd just pushed The Daily Prophet towards him. There was a photograph on the front page of the newspaper of a house Remus knew all too well, though he had never seen it like that before; it was completely destroyed. The front door had been blown in, as had the windows, and there were burn marks on the bricks from hexes someone had dodged. Despite that, the thing that had made Remus lose it was in the night sky above what was left of the house: the Dark Mark. He hadn't let himself read the article, he hadn't needed to. The evidence of what had happened was in the photograph. He'd barely looked at the photograph before he had completely broken down. Ophelia was gone.

Remus saw her face everywhere he went. In the morning, when he looked in the mirror after his shower, he could swear he saw the girl who had left in the background. When he went out into town for a while, he turned the corner of the street and he couldn't keep walking because there she would be. When he closed his eyes, her face, her lips, her eyes, everything taunted his imagination. Except it never actually was. His mind played cruel tricks. Even now, on the happiest day of his best friend's life, he could have sworn that he had seen her entering the reception but just shook his head and rubbed his eyes because it couldn't be.

Remus took a swig of his drink.

He looked across the tent and spotted James and Lily dancing madly to the music. They waved their arms and swung their hips, clearly not having a care in the world about what they looked like. Remus smiled. They were so happy. Lily looked amazing and James… Well, he scrubbed up well. They were lucky to have each other, especially during this tough time in the wizarding world. Danger surrounded them. No one knew how long the war would go on for or if it was ever going to end. The thought horrified him. He was terrified of losing his friends – of losing more people he loved. Losing Ophelia had been too much, he couldn't lose anyone else.

Remus took another swig of his drink and turned away from the married couple.

He couldn't help his eyes from drifting over towards the table nearest the entrance where the woman he'd seen just moments before had settled down at. She stared right back at him, face as pale as his own with a mirrored look of fear. He felt sick. When would his mind stop playing tricks on him? It was the worst torture.

The woman's messy, curly brown hair fell past her freckled shoulders and Remus's hand twitched as he remembered how soft it felt between his fingers. Her hazel eyes stared back at him, wide with panic but he just closed his own and gave another shake of his head to try and rid the image of her from his mind. She seemed so real… Every time Remus had seen Ophelia, there had always been something in him that told him she wasn't really there, that she was just the ghost of a person he once knew. But this was different. He could feel her eyes on him, her gaze burning through his skin but even then, he refused to look back. He kept his eyes shut tight with his hands over them for extra protection against painful sight of the woman who had stolen his heart. He pressed his palms hard against his eyes, trying to push his tears back. Hadn't he cried enough these last couple of years?

Back when Remus had first realised what had happened, after the horrific events had really sunk in, he pushed himself away from everyone he knew. He barely spoke to his parents, only when it was necessary and even then it was just a few mumbled words, spoken as though it literally pained him. He lost weight and drank more than he could handle most nights in his bedroom, keeping the door locked so he couldn't be stopped. James, Sirius and Peter refused to be completely cut off, despite Remus's perseverance. He couldn't handle the look in their eyes, that look of pity he had grown to detest so deeply. There were even times in his drunken state that Remus had began to wonder why it had to be Ophelia rather than anyone else he had grown close to throughout the years. He had thought about why it hadn't been Alice or Marlene or even Lily. Anyone but Ophelia. It was selfish and disgusting to even think about that, Remus knew, but his whole being had ached with pain. It still did. He had never voiced those thoughts aloud, especially to the boys even now that he had gotten rid of that view because he knew the guilt of even thinking that way would overwhelm him and cause more pain than James or Sirius would if they found out. He had only come out of that state because of their persistence. The boys had allowed him time to grieve and do some damage to his body, with the worst coming during his monthly transformations. James and Sirius (as well as Peter the odd time) had still stayed with Remus during the full moon, though only appeared after he had transformed because they knew he needed his space. When he was a werewolf, he wouldn't remember them and that was therefore their time to keep him from torturing himself and ripping himself to shreds. Those nights were always hard but they all managed to get through them, gaining more scars each month. They always hung around after Remus transformed back to his human self and once he was well enough, they tried to get him out of his room and into some fresh air, all the while dodging and blocking any hex Remus angrily shot at them with what little energy he had left. It took them over half a year to get Remus to accept Ophelia's death and for him to try to move on with his life. That was the hardest and most impossible thing: moving on.

The chair beside him scraped against the wooden floor as it was pulled back and he felt the presence of a person take a seat. The light, floral perfume hit Remus and he had to do everything in his power to keep it together, to keep the pieces of his broken heart from shattering once more. This couldn't be her. Ophelia was dead and had been for two long years but yet he could feel her next to him, smell her perfume, hear her breaths…

Had he gone mad?

His heart pounded in his ears and the blood in his body ran cold despite the thin sheet of sweat that had began to cover his body. Every ounce of his being wanted so badly to turn and take her in his arms and hug her and kiss her and promise that they would never be separated but how could he do that when it was his mind playing tricks? It couldn't be her, he refused. Remus had seen the papers, he had gone to what had been left of Ophelia's family home and had seen the blood. But why couldn't he get rid of her presence in his head?

The skin on his shoulder burnt white hot when he felt a hand place itself gently on him. He was going to throw up. His hands shook as he pulled them away from his face and he had to force himself to turn his head, to see the woman he refused to believe was really there.

But there she was.

A/N So I've had this story in my head for a couple of years now and I'm finally getting to writing it. This is just a little taster and the next chapter will take us back to the beginning. Please don't forget to leave a review!