Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Author Note: Set after episode 5x11 'Swan Song.'
BETWEEN HEARTBEATS
It was a little while after their whole boat ride to the Underworld that Emma had a chance to actually talk to Henry. He'd been kind of quiet – understandable considering where they were – and he'd seen Killian die right in front of him. Emma pressed her lips together and pushed down the grief and anger she could always feel rising now.
They were going to get Killian back and Gold was going to help, whether he liked it or not.
For now, everyone was resting or talking quietly while Henry sat by himself down by the water. There was a lot of water in the Underworld.
"Not trying to fish, huh?" Emma asked, sitting down beside him.
She was really glad when she looked in the river that all she saw was a blur of long blonde hair and red leather. Henry shook his head, not quite looking at her yet.
"Killian was teaching me."
Right. "I know."
Even when they weren't planning how to stop another Storybrooke crisis, Henry and Killian had spent a lot of time together. Killian hadn't tried to be a father – that was still a sore spot for him, after Neal – but he'd been a friend and Henry had accepted him as an important part of Emma's life, probably before Emma had. He'd teased her about Killian sometimes and had looked happy about it. Her kid's approval, it'd helped.
Now they were both grieving.
"Do you think..." Now Henry turned to look at her, worry, even fear and some kind of really terrible hope mixed up in his eyes even though he looked like he was trying to mask it all. Okay, Emma was officially worried now. "We're in the Underworld."
Emma nodded, steeling herself for whatever had Henry, one of the bravest people she knew, so freaked out.
"Do you think we'll see Dad?"
Emma stared at him, her thoughts and voice plummeting to numb. Neal. That was another deep pain, now it felt fresher than it had done in months. Could Neal be in the Underworld? Who chose who got sent here anyway? Was that why Gold had been so reluctant to come? Maybe there were other people down here that he didn't want to see again too – Milah, his Dad. Emma managed to glance towards where Regina and Robin were talking together, what about Cora? And Marian?
Something very sick and painful was now growing in Emma's stomach and she didn't have the words to comfort her son.
Henry leaned into her and she wrapped an arm around him, overwhelmed suddenly by the possibilities of where she was. Killian was down here, who was he going to meet? Neal? His brother? Milah? Emma was here too and she was going to find him. They were going to share a heart.
Killian had done so much to save Emma from the darkness and this was how he'd been repaid – by her lying to him, hurting him, and by a sacrifice that had rebuilt Gold's power and made him stronger. Of course Gold had become the Dark One again, of course Killian now suffered more than anyone. Gold had to have known that would happen.
For Emma, there'd been Neal and Walsh and now Killian. There'd been all the pain and loss she'd been trying to avoid but she was still here, trying to find Killian. He'd sworn time and time again that he was a survivor, hard to kill. It'd taken Emma to prove him wrong. Now she was going to prove him right, again. She swallowed. Yes, she was.
Killian had told her once, when they'd actually talked about Neal, that he and Neal had reached an accord. He'd been clearly grateful, though still grieving, still guilty and pained about their messy painful past. He and Neal had been linked before Emma had even been born, by Milah, by Gold.
Seeing Neal or his brother, it'd be the same amount of gladness and pain for Killian. He was one of only two people who'd ever called Neal Bae.
"We're doing the right thing, Mom," Henry told her, so sure despite his fear.
Emma's smile wobbled, "You think so?"
Henry drew back, surprise and vehemence bright on his face again, it was so good to see, "Mom, you're still the Savior."
Emma frowned, she was pretty sure the whole Dark-One phase she'd had going on had changed things, "I don't think the Savior can be the Dark One too, kid."
Henry shook his head, "Rumplestiltskin was a hero and a villain."
Emma didn't point out that Rumplestiltskin's hero phase hadn't lasted long and had probably been a means to an end. Even with Neal or Belle around, he'd still always chosen that power. The power of the Dark One...it'd been overwhelming, just knowing she could change things, reshape circumstances her way for once, that she could be in total control. She hadn't sought it for that but she'd still used it to save Killian and look at how that'd turned out.
She didn't crave it now it was gone though; she wasn't going to grab it if it was offered as a way of saving Killian again, she couldn't. And she was certain Gold was going to try manipulating events down here, like he always did. But she'd meant what she'd said; she was going to do this the right way.
"You'll always be the Savior," Henry told her fiercely.
And her parents would be heroes and Henry would be the Author, someday. Regina had been a villain, so had Killian. Then he'd become the man she'd chosen, the man she'd actually wanted to move in with. And soon, they'd share a heart. They would. Because she couldn't have him suffering and she couldn't have him gone.
Emma closed her eyes, her heart thumping loudly, in the Underworld, toward her son and his amazing everlasting faith and towards Killian.
-the end