Disclaimer: These characters belong to J.K. Rowling and I'm not trying to make any profit from this.

A/N: For a long time I've wanted to write a longish story about Sirius and Remus realizing that there's something else than friendship going on between them… I'd be so happy to get any reviews!

Chapter 1: The Beginning

I can admit it. It was weird at first, seeing Remus falling for that girl, beginning to talk to her in an intense tone and beginning to stare at her in the lessons even though he always before had been so focused on studying. I guess the weird part was that before it had been me and James who were chasing after girls. Of course, in a quite different ways. James had had that obsession of his like thousands of years, all the way from when we were thirteen years old and Lily Evans got mad at him and hit him with a pumpkin. James had had a few non-serious girlfriends, but all the time he had been thinking about Lily Evans. And I had made a list of Hogwarts' prettiest girls and made my best to try them all. "Trying" didn't usually involve anything more than talking to a girl a few times and some snogging, and to be honest my list had been quite short in the first place, but I was doing something anyway.

Remus was different. In fact he was more like Peter, who had been dating with Melissa Brown for almost a year before they both got bored, besides the fact that Remus had never showed an interest to any girl. Before Sarah, of course. It's not my fault that I got surprised, when he fancied that brown-haired girl that was from Gryffindor and a year yonger than we, quite a nice girl in the end, but Remus fancying a girl? Remus trying to hit on a girl? Remus beginning to date a girl?

'Padfoot?'

I blinked. James was watching me a suspicious look on his face. I saw Peter trying to hide his Potion book under his bed.

'What?'

'Nothing', James said still staring at me. 'Just thinking. You looked like you were somewhere else, like in Spain at least. Or Moon. Are you coming?'

I nodded. It was the first Friday since we've come back to Hogwarts to begin the seventh grade and there was no option. We were going to go to Hogsmeade, enjoy the abilities being seventeen brought, stay until midnight, drink a few fire whiskeys untill we all would be wasted and then come back.

'Where's Moony?' I asked.

'Not coming.' James grinned. 'He's gone to the common room for Sarah, I guess, and I'm quite sure they've got enough to do. You know, they haven't seen each other since July.

'He's not coming to Hogsmeade?' I repeated hating the tone my voice had taken. 'With us?'

James shrugged. The glance he threw at me was quite sharp. 'He's in love, Pads. I can't claim that I wouldn't prefer spending the night with Lily if I had a chance. He'll come with us some other time.'

'Yeah, I don't care. Good for him.' I changed my robe to a pullover and jeans. 'Warmtail, are you ready?'

'I can't find my shoes', Peter said.

'I'm quite sure you left one to bathroom.'

'Why would I - oh, I guess you're right. Thanks, Prongs.'

'He'll come with us next time', James said when the door closed behind us.

-

'Any girls on sight, Pete?' James' voice was probably quite loud, but I don't know if anyone cared. It was almost eleven at night and "Three Broomstics" was almost empty, anyway. We couldn't bother anyone. I leaned over the table to grab a new bottle of fire whiskey to wash away a feeling that everyone else was hiding in their own homes.

'Not really', Peter said. He had always had surprisingly good ability to drink and still maintain his thoughs quite clear. I'm quite sure his eyes were still quite sharp unlike James', even though I surely wasn't the right person to think who was sober and who wasn't. 'I've been watching that Ravenclaw girl, anyway. You know, two years younger than we, quite tall, red hair.'

'The thick one', James said surprisingly seriously. 'I guess I know who you're speaking of. What's her name? Mary? Marie?'

'Maria, I guess.'

'Well, that's just great. You have her.'

Peter shrugged. 'Let's see. It's not like I've got on obsession to her or anything.'

James frowned. 'Was that trying to be an insult? Because if it was, I can assure you that I'm not insulted at all. Lily Evans has smiled to me twice in a week and that's the new record. She'll fall for me before October.'

'Is she talking to you again?' Peter asked sounding surprised. 'After the last spring?'

'It was an accident', James claimed loudly. 'Those roses were supposed to follow her, not… try to catch her. And I hadn't been thinking about thorns. And I apologized like, well, thousands of times. And I guess she liked it, anyway.'

'Liked having to go to the Hospital Wing to get off all those thorns?' I raised my eyebrow. 'Sounds to me that Evans has something to do with her mental health.'

'Shut up, dog', James said. 'And how're you, anyway? Pete's, got a girl, Remus's definitely got a girl. I'm gonna marry Lily Evans before Christmas. How about you? Any birds you're fancying?'

I grabbed a bottle and enjoyed the warm feeling in my throat. And in my head. 'No. One of us has to maintain sane.'

'Don't worry', Peter said in a serious tone. 'I'm not gonna fall for anyone, either. Maria is just nice one to watch.'

'With that ass of hers, yeah', James said.

'In fact I think I'm done with girls for now', I said suddenly, not sure where the thought had came. 'No offense, but I'm getting enough of them when I hear you speaking of your Evans, Prongs. And Moony's eyes when he's looking at that bird of his. Besides, I've snogged all the best girls already.'

'Second time is always better', James said. He looked like he hadn't known what he was talking about. Literally.

'Thanks but no thanks.' I took a deep breath. I was beginning to be a little tired. Maybe I should just buy one more fire whiskey. 'Or maybe Susie Thomas. She was quite nice. You know, the one I actually dated a year ago. The one with reddish hair and the boobs.'

'I used to dream of her', Peter said. Well, he wasn't apparently as sober as I had thought he was.

'I kind of miss her', I kept on. 'Maybe I should ask her out.'

'I have to marry Lily before the war begins', James said in low voice that made both me and Peter stop with our hands holding half-full glasses.

'James, don't talk about it', I said harsly. 'This is our first Friday night. It's bad enough that Moony's left us.'

'But it's true', James said. 'It's coming. I know it, you know it, Pete knows it. My dad's working hell lot more than he used to and if I ask my mom about it, she tells nothing. One neighbor of us went for a holiday and now no one knows where he is. I'm not a fool, Padfoot.'

'Not now, Prongs', I said. 'Fucking war. I wanna have Moony here.'

-

I almost fell asleep before he came. James had gone straight to the bed, or at least he had tried. His upper torso was leaning against the bed, but his feet were still on the floor. Me and Peter had tried to make him move, but he had already fallen asleep, and neither of us really cared. Now Peter was snoring, but I couldn't help staying awake. Remus' bed was empty. Was he still in the common room and why hadn't we seen him? Where else could he be? Doing Sarah in her own bed? For the first time I was almost glad that we couldn't get to girls' dormitories.

I recognized the steps far before he reached the door. Remus was always walking like he had been little scared or at least suspecting that somebody might be spying on him or following him. I never asked why he did that, and I guess he wouldn't have known, either. When the door opened and he stepped inside, I took a deep breath and let the short burst of laughter come out of my throat.

'Padfoot?' Remus asked, hesitating, but besides that he sounded quite cheerful. 'You're awake?' A short pause. 'Why the heck is James sleeping on the floor?'

Well, he had apparently fallen down. 'He was in bed half an hour again. Or, at least he was almost in bed.'

Remus sighed. 'And what're you doing awake? Waiting for me?'

I wondered if he was right. 'Maybe. Where were you? We couldn't see you in the common room. How did you get to her dormitory?'

'I couldn't. We were just walking.'

'Walking?'

'Around the corridors.' He was smiling. He so was smiling. It was too dark to see, but I could imagine the expression on his face. 'How was Hogsmeade?'

'Better than ever. Bad luck you abandoned us. What's so great in the corridors that you have to wander there when you could be in your warm, nice common room?'

'Well, I've been thinking that a few times myself. Especially when you and James get your stupid ideas of going to test Filch's nerves in the middle of the night for no reason.'

'That's not the point. Are you sleeping with her?'

I heard him sit down to his bed. He was breathing a little too heavily. I smiled to the ceiling that I couldn't clearly see. Remus Lupin was such a lost case.

'How did you know?'

'I'm your best friend. I'm supposed to know. Was this the first time?'

'Yeah.' Remus sounded like he was hesitating. 'Sirius, I know that kind of things mean nothing to you, but it's not the same for me. Could you please be kind and not to mention anything to the others?'

'What do you mean, it means nothing to me?'

'Sirius.'

'Okay, I won't tell them. It's a promise. Now tell me what you meant.'

He was hesitating, I could sense it. 'You've done it many times. And you keep talking about it… about sex… with James and Peter like it's nothing too serious, but guess what? I was scared to hell.'

'Why? Was she demanding or something?' I felt the angry push of blood going washing through my veins. 'Remus, listen to me. We won't disapprove you even though you wouldn't like to fuck your girlfriend.'

He laughed. 'You still aren't sober, Padfoot. Your brain isn't really working. No, she wasn't forcing me or anything. I wanted to. I don't know if you can get it, you were probably so certain all the way, but I just don't have your self-confidence.'

'But it was good, anyway?'

I sensed the smile. 'Yeah. A little awkward at first, I mean, she hadn't done it before, either, and we were just two fools trying to manage with something we knew nothing about… but in the end it was fine.'

'Fine? You've fucked a girl for the first time and it was just fine?'

'She's not just a girl, she's Sarah. She's got a name, Sirius.' Suddenly Remus sounded quite tired. 'Are you saying that it should have been perfect?'

'No. Don't care about me. I had to spent too many hours with James and Peter only. Next time you've got to come with us.'

'I'm sorry about tonight', he said. 'I would have come, unless - '

'Unless you didn't have a beautiful, smart girlfriend to shag', I said. 'James said something like that, although I guess he was talking about Evans, not Sarah.'

'Well, I hope he gets Lily in the end', Remus said slowly. 'And that you get someone, too, Sirius. You should have a proper girlfriend. One you'd fall for. It makes quite a difference.'

'Mission impossible. And, if James gets her girl, someone has to keep sense in his mind.'

'Peter's doing it. You can fall in love.'

'Peter's after that Maria from Ravenclaw.'

Remus smiled. 'Well, good for him. Sirius, I'm falling asleep. I couldn't imagine how tired it's to…'

'Don't you even try. You just want to fall asleep soon and get dreaming all those dirty dreams of yours.'

'Right. Good night.'

He didn't fall asleep in twenty minutes. I heard him breathe and decided I needed a girl. Not a girlfriend, but Susie Thomas and some snogging. Otherwise I could imagine feeling lonely if Remus got more attached to that girl.

-

Operation Susie Thomas wasn't hard to make true. She had always been that kind of a girl who's not thinking too much and doesn't make things too hard by thinking too much. It was easy for me to manage with her. She was Hufflepuff and in a seventh grade as we were, too,, she had reddish blond hair, pretty little nose, sharp eyes and great breasts. She was also smart, but in her case 'smart' didn't mean like Lily Evans' 'smart' but more like 'you can't fool me, I know that you just want to get some snogging and don't care a shit whether I live in Sheffield or Manchester' –kind of smart. As I said, I liked her.

I asked her out when I was looking for Moony in the library. Susie was reading something about Magical Creatures, I guess it counted as studying but I didn't really want to know that much. I just walked to her, greeted her and asked, if she wanted to go to a date with me.

'Where?' she asked.

'I'll figure out something.'

'Will you?'

I shrugged. 'Do I have to?'

She smiled. 'Not really. After dinner? I can't now, I've got some homework to do.'

'Too bad.'

'You've been waiting for a year, you can wait for a little more time.'

'Sure', I said. She made a gesture of trying to get me to leave, and so I obeyed and almost forgot to look for Moony.

At the dinner I was looking at her and trying to see when she would leave. James and Peter were throwing looks at each other, but they didn't bother to say anything. James still looked a little nauseous and he attempted really hard not to stare at Evans all the time. And finally Susie got up and I followed her.

'It's been a year', she said when we walked towards, well, I don't really know where we were going.

'Yeah.'

'I won't fuck you.'

I nodded. 'Fine. Hell, James' still trying to hit on Evans and now it seems he's making some kind of progress. And Remus' got Sarah Jones, you probably know that already.'

She looked amused. 'Are you jealous of your friends?'

'Not really. But they're all about girls now. I had to do something.'

'Like hit on me.'

'Yeah.'

We got to a silent corner. I was still thinking Remus and where he had done it with Sarah - in the end I had forgotten to ask specific information - when Susie stopped. I kissed her and she tasted the same as always, same as the most of the girls do. I can't say anything accurate about that taste. It's just… a girl taste. I should probably ask Remus if he's noticed it, too.

'I dated someone', Susie said a few minutes later when we tried to catch our breath again. 'A ravenclaw. It was last year, he was a year older. Michael.'

I hugged her and stroked her curly hair. 'But not anymore?'

'It just happened. I don't know why. I might have really liked him.'

'Too bad.' I smiled a little. 'Well, good for me. I'm not stealing you from anyone.'

'And I'm just stealing you from your friends', she said. 'To whom you're jealous because they've got girls and you don't.'

'Only Remus.'

'But you're scared that James' getting Lily.'

'Maybe.'

She rolled her eyes. I kissed her smiling mouth and felt her fingertips traveling under my shirt.

'You know, Sirius, they won't forget you', she said in a low voice against my neck. 'One can love two persons at the same time.'

'How about four?'

Susie leaned against my shoulder and I hold her near. A few years younger Gryffindor boy walked the corridor and turned to glare at us over his shoulder, and I grinned at him wondering what the boy's name was.

Later that evening I was trying to decide if I ought to cut my hair, when James came to the dormitory. It didn't took a second to realize that something had happened and that had probably something to do with Lily Evans. He was smiling broadly looking even more stupid than usually. After a few minutes he managed to tell me that he had asked Lily out and the girl had said with only a bit unpleasant tone that she might think about it.