So far this is just a oneshot, if you want a sequel, review and i will :) enjoy :D x
"Now, gents, there is something you must understand." Leah Clearwater paced up and down in front of the male population of the Cullens, hands behind her back, head in the air.
"Being the bane of one's existence is a strenuous, demanding job; one which I take seriously and to heart. One must not lack in effort and inspiration, much less intelligence and imagination. However!" She turned on her heel and stared degradingly at the men, each of whom were watching with respectful gazes. "I do not hold with cowards. I do not hold with cheats and liars. And I do not hold with mercy."
She studied each and every one of them- Jasper, Carlisle, Edward and Emmett- then carried on pacing.
"So. Your objective: To irritate Tanya Cullen to the point where she vacates the area. Your inspiration: the idea of an existence purged of any 'strawberry blonde' curls." She made quotation marks at this point. "though, truth be told, she's obviously a fucking ginger." Leah stopped for a second and gazed in to the distance. "Anyway! Are you ready to bend over backwards, to strain yourselves with unreachable targets, to do whatever it takes to achieve a seemingly unattainable goal?"
they all nodded fervently.
"Right! Then we begin tomorrow. Meet me in the Meadow at noon. Be there or be triangle. Wait, it's square... be there or be square. Or dead. Or undead. Ah, whatever, I'm too tired for this shit."
She wandered out on to the porch, passing Jacob, who grinned at her.
"Heya, Leah.."
"Alraaaght, ma brudda."
And thus began the Cullen's new mission:
The eradication of Tanya.