One Heck Of A Vacation
Disclaimer: CBS and their affiliates own Criminal Minds...
Summary: What happens when a vacation turns out to be anything but a vacation...
A/N: I absolutely loved all my vacation stories, but you all know me I needed to fix them up and re-post them as a multi chapter series of oneshot.
Thanks for reading, don't forget to leave a review.
"None of us knows the what the next change is going to be, what unexpected opportunity is just around the corner, waiting a few months or a few years to change all the tenor of our lives." Kathleen Norris
Emily sighed looking out the window as she watched the snow fall even harder on the ground. She felt the presence behind her before she even looked up.
"I'm sorry, Emily" Dave softly whispered, taking the window seat beside her, "I know how much you wanted to go on that hike up the mountain."
Suppressing another sigh she turned around, shrugging her shoulders, "Eh, I guess it's not a big deal."
Patting her lightly on the shoulder, "Well look at it this way, we're here on this wonderful vacation, in a beautiful lodge, all the room service we want and..."
"And what?" Emily asked watching his face light up, "What?"
"No active cases to call us back home" he told her watching her spirits perk up a little "Just a good old fashion, worry free, vacation."
"There is that whole thing with the kids though," Emily asked, "Did JJ, Will and Hotch find an au pair yet?"
Dave shook his head, "Hotch turned down the last three because they, and I quote 'looked unsavory'."
"Unsavory?" she frowned at that, "How?"
Dave tilted his head to the side, "JJ wants your input there's another two batch coming in."
Relenting, the older man helped pull her out of the seat, two marched through the lodge into the large living room.
It really didn't surprise Emily that Dave would have booked all of them in one of the best lodges in the country, after all he was Dave Rossi. If he wanted the best, he booked the best.
And he apparently wanted them all to have a Dave Rossi experience.
"Oh my God" Dave murmured when he and Emily walked into the room, watching a young nineteen year old rush past them crying.
"Next" Hotch muttered, nodding to Dave and Emily who joined them on the couch.
"Why was she crying?" Emily asked sitting beside her blonde friend.
"Why do you think?" JJ asked nodding in the dark haired man's direction, "He felt she shouldn't be allowed to drive not with three tickets."
"Three tickets?" the brunette repeated.
"One for speeding, one for a busted taillight and the other for parking in a tow away zone" Hotch said, clicking on his Tablet then looked up to see three annoyed agents staring back at him, "What?"
"She was a kid, Aaron" Dave told his friend, raising his eyebrow at the younger man's unfazed demeanor.
"Well I don't want some teenager who likes speeding with a broken taillight to park in a tow away zone while my son's in the car" Hotch said unsympathetically, "Call me crazy but I thought you two would feel the same."
Hoping to deflect this conversation she looked over at the list, "Who's next?"
"Sydney Collins" Hotch read, "Twenty three, junior year in college. She's study to be a phlebotomist and works part time in a used book store on her college campus."
"That sounds promising" Emily offered watching Hotch reach for his cell phone.
"Garcia," Hotch said watching Dave groan at that, "Sydney Collins, twenty three, college student at LIU."
The two women went over the application while Hotch made notes, "Thanks."
"So does she past the background check?" JJ asked.
"We need a chat with Miss Collins" Hotch replied getting up, and wandering to a small seating area in the back, "Sydney Collins?"
A pretty tanned young woman, with honey blonde hair walked over with a bright smile to the older man, "That's me."
"Take a seat" Hotch replied sitting back down next to Dave, "So do you have any experience with children, Miss Collins?"
Sydney smiled, "Yes, I've babysat for my younger brother and sisters all during high school. I'm certified in CPR, and know how to handle crisis with first aid treatment."
"That's great" Dave replied, looking relieved.
"And you're currently in college?" JJ asked.
"Yes, I'm studying to be a phlebotomist" Sydney replied, "I wanted to try something different and that seems the best line for me."
"And what about this restraining order that was issued last year?" Hotch asked shocking the three and the woman.
"Excuse me?" Sydney asked.
"Restraining order?" Hotch repeated, "There's a restraining order on you by a Courtney Marris?"
The woman nervously played with her fingers, "Well that's uh..." taking a deep breath, "That was a misunderstanding."
"How so?" Hotch asked, noticing the discomfort on the young woman's face, "If we're going to hire you we need to know why there is something as serious as this on you."
"I had an incident with Courtney" Sydney said softly, "She accused me of... well, you see it was like this. I wrote a piece for my Lit class, she turned in hers around the same time, and well we were accused of plagiarism."
"And that warranted a restraining order?" JJ asked.
"No" the younger blonde shook her head, "But then she told the Professor that I... that I did it and I almost got expelled. And well I totaled her car."
"Totaled?" Emily asked.
"I kind of used my Lacrosse stick and redecorated her back window" Sydney said, seeing the stunned faces of the agents "It was an honest mistake, I swear I'm not a bad woman. I would never ever endanger a child. I swear it. If you hire me, I will treat your children with the utmost care."
"Well" JJ said finding her voice, "We've got your contact information, have a good day."
Sydney nodded grabbing her bag, hurrying out of the living room.
"Was that necessary?" Dave asked his friend, "It's an interview not an interrogation."
"She's has a restraining order on her" Hotch reminded the group, "Imagine if she runs into that girl and she ends up arrested, huh? What if she has the kids with her? That's not a chance I'm willing to take."
"Next" Emily called out, watching a thirty year old woman with dark red hair walk over with a grin across her.
Hotch looked down at the papers, "Well who do you think would be a suitable candidate?"
Dave grinned, "Now I have no problem with big red, but then again I don't have any kids, so I'm leaning towards her."
Garcia raised an eyebrow at him, "Now why doesn't that surprise me?"
Emily chuckled lightly, "Because he's Dave Rossi, the man is a natural horn dog."
"Hey" Dave protested watching the others chuckled, "I'm not that bad, it's not like I'm Morgan."
"What?" the athletic profiler said, walking over to the small group with Reid, "Derek Morgan loves the ladies."
"Huh" JJ scoffed, shaking her head as she went back over the list, "Ok, Valerie Meyers out."
Morgan peered over her shoulder, "Why are you crossing the hot red head off?"
The three women rolled their eyes, "Please, my Hunk of Man Candy don't make me smack you."
"What?" Morgan asked, looking at them only to shrug then sat down on the ottoman, "So who are you going to pick? Keep in mine they just have to watch the kids for a couple of hours while we go out skiing, snowboarding and..."
"Calm down" JJ told him, "There's a process to this, it has to be someone reliable and trustworthy."
"Preferably one without a criminal record or a restraining order out on them" Hotch added, sighing, "And unfortunately I don't trust anyone on this list."
"There were a few good candidates in there" Dave commented, "And I'm not talking about the Bridget Bardot lookalike."
Garcia snorted, "Right."
"I did like that Mrs. Brooks" Emily told the two women, "She seemed sweet."
"And grandmotherly" JJ added, "She could handle the boys."
Hotch raised an eyebrow to that, "What?"
Dave shook his head, "The woman was practically ninety years old. One trip to the ice skating rink and she'll be asleep before they've laced up their skates."
"She's a board certified nanny" Emily told them, "I think she knows what she's doing."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah" Morgan said, "But Princess, maybe it'd be better if they got someone who wasn't alive when the first World War was going on."
JJ shook her head, "There's nothing wrong with Mrs. Brooks" the blonde said, "Besides she comes highly recommended by the staff here."
"Maybe for an older child, but not for two hyperactive children" Hotch told the three women.
"Please it's not like they're going to tie her to a tree or anything" Garcia replied, "There are plenty of indoor activities that Jack and Henry could do with Mrs. Brooks."
"No" Hotch replied, "There is no way I'm going to subject an elderly woman to two young boys. There's got to be another person in here..."
While going through the applications, Emily felt a tap on her shoulder and turned around, noticing a young concierge standing there.
"Yes?" Emily asked, watching the young man shift nervously.
"I don't want to disturb your meeting but there's another applicant that filed for the nanny position" the young man informed the brunette passing along the slip of paper, "She doesn't have a formal application or resume, but she was highly recommended by another family."
"Thank you" Emily nodded, turning back to the team, "We've got another candidate."
"Really?" Hotch asked, hopeful not liking the applicants that they just interviewed, "Tell us about them?"
"Looking at this, she's an older woman in her late fifties" Emily said, "She's raised three children of her own and just recently became a child care giver."
"Sounds promising" Garcia said, "I mean had children of her own so she's got first hand experience."
"Go on" Hotch asked, watching her frown, "What is it?"
"Well there's not much on here, but she had a real career before switching to this career path" Emily said, looking over at the concierge "What can you tell us about her?"
"All that I can tell you is that for the past few months she's been residing her as a guest when one day she saved a young boy from drowning in the lake" the man told the team.
Garcia gasped, "Oh my... well what happened then?"
"The boy and her grew attached to one another and the parents were so grateful and well she ended up being the au pair here since" the concierge informed them, "Every family that's hired has been pleased. She has a warm presence with the children but also has a firm hand so they'll behave."
Hotch looked impressed, "Can we meet her?" looking over at JJ who nodded in agreement.
"She's right in the office, let me go get her" the man said, hurrying off.
"Well this sounds promising" Dave commented, "We find the right sitter and we'll be coasting through our vacation easily."
"And that means it off to hot oil massages girls" Garcia added, "And hunky masseuses."
"That was something I could live without" Morgan replied, "Just think of all the fun we have while the little ones are off with Mary Poppins."
"I hardly call myself that," the older female voice called out making the BAU team tense as they look up to see her.
This was something that none of them had ever expected to see.
"Chief Strauss" Hotch croaked out, "What are you..."
"I hear you interested in my services as a nanny" Strauss said with a grin, "I think I'd like to accept the position if it's still opened."
Even Dave, the king of cool, was stunned by that and his head turned to the two parents who were too stunned to speak.
"How about we do a test run?" Emily offered, "A little meet and greet with the boys over hot chocolate and see how it goes from there?"
"That'd be splendid" Strauss smiled, watching the shocked faces of her former team try and process this.
Sitting back in the arm chair, Dave watched in glee while Hotch and JJ kept their eyes on the two boys like hawks.
It was so much as fear that the former Section Chief would devour the children, but more along the lines of whether their two parents would be able to finally find their voice.
And he wondered if this was even a good idea to begin with. After all everyone on this team had history with Strauss, and not all of it would be characterized as good history.
"That's mine" Henry called out wrenching the toy car from the older boy, "Give it here."
"Uh uh" Jack called out, "Emmy got these for me, Henry."
Hotch, Emily and JJ were just about to intervene with they watched their former boss lean down and softly say, "Boys, is that any way to behave?"
The small children looked up at the older woman about to protest when she said, "Share the cars or neither of you can play with them."
"My mommy will let me play with them if I want too" Henry replied back.
"Will she?" Strauss said, "Does your mom like you fighting with other boys? Does your father like that, Jack?"
Both boys shook their heads, "Then I think your parents will have no issues with removing the cause of conflict."
"Huh?" Jack asked.
The older woman extended her hand, "Share or pass over the toys."
Emily leaned over to Dave, "She's like a freaking miracle worker."
"Who knew she'd be better with children then adults?" JJ added.
The team watched on in silence as their former boss was able to take control of several instances with Jack and Henry and knew that despite their own history with the woman, there was no one better handled for this job.
As Strauss stood up the women watched as Hotch took Strauss aside speaking with her and watched as the older woman shake his hand before walking away.
"Well?" Dave asked, "What did you decide?"
"She starts first thing tomorrow morning" Hotch told them, as he took a seat opposite the group, "Lets just hope this doesn't blow up in our faces."
"Ah hell, what's the worst that could happen?" Emily offered, "It's not like she can fire any of us."
Dave chuckled at that, shaking his head, "She's got you there, Aaron. Just relax."
Standing up, Emily wandered over to the bar, "Besides it's not like she's plotting to turn the kids against you in some massive throw..."
Looking up she noticed the puzzled looks on their face, "Right?" seeing the worry on their face, "What?"
Dave chuckled sharing a look with the brunette, he rolled his eyes while Hotch mentally cataloged the new fear running through his veins.
"A keen sense of humor helps us to overlook the unbecoming, understand the unconventional, tolerate the unpleasant, overcome the unexpected and outlast the unbearable." Billy Graham
To Be Continued...
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