Seras never thought she would feel this emotion for the ex-Catholic priest. Pity. How could she feel sorry for him? He had tried to kill her…and Sir Integral. She wondered what Pip would think of her feelings, and her Master. Both would probably call her foolish. They would be right too.

Damn you, Pip. I miss you. Why couldn't you stay with me just a little longer? The Captain hadn't left her suddenly but Seras had felt Pip slipping away, little by little. Sometimes she still felt his influence on her: His tastes, attitude, and strength. They were all a part of who Seras Victoria was now, for better or worst.

She watched Alexander from the corner of the library. He was reading one of Integral's books on the history of Romania. She wondered when his obsession with her Master would end. But, Seras couldn't blame him entirely. Most of Anderson's misfortune was in some way linked to Alucard – much like her own.

"I can feel yer presence, Draculina." Alexander said as he looked around the room.

Seras emerged from the mist. "Oh, sorry."

Anderson grinned at the girl. She was such walking contradiction, a monster with more humanity then most humans. "So what do ye want, Draculina?"

Seras glared back at him. Why couldn't anyone call her by name? "I am not Alucard's wife, nor will I ever be. Please don't call me by that name. I think you know what my real name is, Alexander."

Anderson chuckled; he had hit a nerve. He put his head down and continued to read about Vlad. He hoped what he heard was true and that knowledge really was power.

Seras sat down at the table and watched him from the corner of her eye. It was because he was like her. That was the reason she felt sorry for him. Since the war had ended and there was no enemy to fight, she felt out of place. Integral spent most of her time with Alucard doing things she would rather not even think of. She had heard the noises they made in Integral's office during their meetings. Seras had thought Anderson would have fought for Integral but that time never came. He performed some of Walter's more technical duties and would go on the occasional mission. But he never tried to court Integral. He merely followed Integral's orders, just like her.

"Will you ever stop fighting him?" Seras asked him.

"No, it is in my blood to defeat him. I shan't forget about it, until I kill him." Anderson didn't mind the Draculina. Sometimes he even enjoyed her presence. He reminded her that humanity existed in places where you least expected it. Maybe there is hope for me, still.

Seras started to ask him a question but thought better of it. She posed another question instead. "Do you really think you can defeat him by studying what he was like as a human?" Seras asked.

"Aye, those who do not study history are condemned to repeat it." He replied. "Now that I've answered yer question, you must answer mine. Do ye ever regret taking his gift and becoming what ye are?"

"Sometimes I do but I try not to think about it much. What about you, Alexander?" Seras asked him.

"What about me?"

"Do you ever think about accepting the gift of immortality? You would have a better chance at defeating him." Seras studied him as she waited for the answer. One of the reasons for her question was selfish and she hated even thinking it. There was only one vampire who could give him the gift and it was not Alucard. Everyday it seemed like her humanity was slipping away. Seras watched the pulse on his neck wanting to do what she knew was wrong. Was it her imagination or could she smell the blood underneath his skin?

Anderson considered her question carefully. The Draculina did have a point. He would have a better chance at defeating that beast if he was a monster as well. But, who could give him that gift? Certainly not Alucard. It was at that moment he noticed the innocent Draculina standing above him, her eyes burning with hunger, staring at his neck.

"Tell me, Alexander. What would your answer be?" Seras asked as she ran her finger along the pulse line on his neck.

Anderson froze. He did not say a word. He had thought about becoming a monster. After all, what was left for him now? Maybe if he were a monster, like Dracula, Integral Hellsing would lust for him like she did that demon. Anderson knew his inaction; his failure to speak could be taken as his acceptance of her offer.

He didn't know if he had spoken, nodded his head but Alexander felt Draculina's fangs rip into his skin. At that one moment, Anderson felt both pain and pleasure beyond anything he had experience in his long life. The last thought he had before his life ended was a question. Will losing my soul to become like him, to defeat it him, be worth---"

And then his world became darkness. When Anderson awoke, he would justify his actions to himself and to her.