A/N: I took a rather long break. I'll continue with my other stories, but I just don't know how to yet.
But here, have another.
I'm planning for this one to be short.
I've been friends with Jose for as long as I could remember. Our fathers served in the army together so our mothers hung out most of the time. When my mom divorced Ray, I stayed with him. I knew I wouldn't have a stable life with her moving around all the time. Jose was always there for everything I went through. First pimple, acne break out, first boyfriend, break-ups, you name it. He was a year younger than me, but he acted as my big brother. I still remember the night I was leaving for college, how heart broken I felt that I wouldn't see him as much. How different life would be for me. We promised to stay in contact everyday. We've been true to that promise. I'm going back home tonight for his birthday. I told him I wouldn't be able to make it and he sounded upset. I wanted to surprise him.
"You ok?" Charles asked.
I've been with Charles for four years. This last year hasn't really felt all the special. We went to the same high school and now we're going to the same college. It feels like both of us are drifting apart, but we're so used to being with each other that life without him would seem different. I know it's a stupid excuse not to break it off, but I love him. I'm just not sure how I feel about everything else.
"Yes, thanks for asking. I'm just so excited," I said. I told him he didn't need to come with me, but he wanted to make sure I got home safe. He's flying back tonight. "Thanks for coming, but you know you really didn't need to."
He held my hand for reassurance, "I want to make sure you get home okay and it'd be nice to say to my family and some friends." He smiles. I love how he focuses on his career, but I'm not part of his plan nor his future. You would think that four years of being together he would include me in his plans, but his future is just about him. I'm being selfish, I know, but I can't help it. I need to let him be. I've become so dependent on him, it's just good for both of us.
"I'll come back with you next week, babe," he said.
"You don't need to Charles, don't be ridiculous! Don't waste your money," I said. He's being so over protective.
"Look, Ana, I care about you. If anything happens, I want you to be the last person I'm with," he said, he seems so sincere about it. "I just can't imagine life without you, I know I don't show my love sometimes, but I do."
And this is why it's hard to let go of him. He could make you feel so important.
"Attention Passengers, this is your Captain speaking. Please fasten you seatbelt once again. We are preparing for landing. I want to thank you all for flying with us today," the guy on the speaker said. There were clicks everywhere.
"What did you get Jose for his birthday?" he asked while he fastened his seatbelt.
"I ordered a cookie cake," I said. "I ordered a bracelet online and Ray said it's already at the house all wrapped up."
"That's nice of you," he said. "A few more and we're home, darling." He gave my hand a small squeeze and closed his eyes. He doesn't like the landing. It makes him all light headed.
.
.
"Where are we headed, Ana?" Ray asked. He had not let go of me since we first saw each other at the airport. I love my dad and I missed him very much. This is the first time I've gone back since I left.
"I just want to go home and get ready for Jose's get together birthday party," I said, leaning on his shoulder. I hope everything is ok with my dad. I feel like he's sad about being alone. Me going away for college didn't help either. I could actually see his wrinkles. They weren't so noticeable before. "I missed you a lot, dad!"
"I missed you a lot too, Ana," he said. Charles got picked up by his parents and he'll stop by before he leaves tonight. "You know, Jose was really upset you said you weren't going to make it."
"Dad, did you really think I wasn't going to make it?" I said. "He's very important to me, you know?"
"I know that and if not being with him makes you sad, then you should say something," he said. I cried to Ray the night I was leaving for college. I told him I liked Jose, but Jose didn't like me back. Well either that or he was really good at hiding it.
I've thought about breaking it off with Charles plenty of times, but it didn't seem right. I'm being selfish to my own happiness. "I'm still with Charles," I mumbled.
"I know, but does he make you happy?" Ray asked. "You've been with him for a long time. You're my daughter and I know when you're happy and when you're not. I'm going to have to make a wild guess and say you want to be with Jose."
He's always right.
.
.
It's good to be home. I've actually missed my bed. In a little bit, I'm going to see Jose and for some reason, I'm very nervous. I looked at myself once more in the mirror. I feel like I'm going on a first date. I text Charles and let him know I won't be bringing my phone with me. I didn't wait for a text back. I grabbed the wrapped gift and walk out of my room. "Dad!" I call out. "I'm leaving!"
"Living room!" he shouts. I walk in the living room and give him a kiss. "Are you trying to break Jose's heart?" he gestures to my outfit.
"Dad, not funny," I let out a small laugh. "I'll see you there, ok?" I give him a kiss one more time and off I go to Jose's house. He lives right next door and I'm hoping he's not looking outside his window. I feel butterflies in the stomach. I walked in and see his parents in the living. I put my finger to my mouth gesturing for them not to make too much noise. His mom excitedly runs up to me. "I am so glad you're here," she whispers and gives my cheek a kiss.
"Welcome back," his dad said and pulled me into a hug.
"I missed you both!" I said. "We'll catch up in a little bit."
I make my way up the stairs and the butterflies are getting stronger. I peak in his room and he has his back on me. I'm not sure if it's the right time, he's shirtless. Heck, I want to see him. I knocked once. "Mom, not now please. I don't feel like doing anything," he said. I could feel the hurt in his voice. I had really hurt him.
"Shall I leave you alone?" I asked. He stopped typing on his computer and slowly looked back at me. He has changed a lot. He cut his hair short which fits him perfectly. He gets up and his lips curves into a smile. I couldn't help but look at his abs. My oh my, someone has been working out.
"No, you shouldn't," he whispers. I run up to him to give him a hug.
This right here is what I've been wanting for what seems like a lifetime.
I want him.
