One night all wrong (very wrong)
Another sinister masterpiece! (Not really)
The awful Author: Evilkittiebobo
Warnings of course so here they are Language (dumb fuck), adult humor, drug abuse/misuse/used way too much, and finally whatever is dumb as hell! ^_^ And please don't read if you are faint at heart in any way and really not into hard core, stupid, bad, insensitive, I mean really SICK stuff! Actually, it's not that bad. Exaggeration sells more. I can only give so much of a warning. PG-17 (this time)
Oh, and more Relena bashing.
Heero stares at the television screen with his eyes as wide as saucers. His mind is caught in a spiraling warp. Sticky, clear strands of drool overflow his mouth and drip onto the floor. There's not a movement out of him. It was as if he has fallen into a wide eyed coma. A fly lands on his face and crawls over his dry cobalt blue eye. His forehead is melted to the glass screen that showed pixels of pictures. He has become a zombie caught in another world. Mindless. Where had his mind gone? Where else, but in the TV?
A commotion from the hall chatters and clatters like a birds in a flock. The flock enters: Genesis in the lead followed by Duo, Trowa, Juggles, Quatre and Gedra. "Heero get out of the way. We're going to watch a movie." Genesis comes up and pushes him over. He falls to the ground like a limp noodle. "Heero?" Genesis nervously hovers over the body.
"Hey, what's wrong with Heero?" Duo perks up after plopping on the couch. Trowa comes up behind Genesis and peeks over her shoulder. She turns suddenly and punches him dead in the nose. The big boy tumbles to the floor, totally startled, with warm blood running down his lip.
"Genesis!?" Juggles jumps up to go over and help her fallen crush. "What did you do that for?"
Genesis holds back her fist and glares at them. "He grabbed my ass." She puts her hands on her hips. They all look at Trowa a bit amazed.
"It was tempting." He admits. Juggles drops him as Genesis and Duo shake their heads. Closet pervert.
"So wuz up with Heero?" Duo also came over to hover.
"Heero!!!!!" Juggles shouts into his ear.
"I don't think that helped." Trowa dares to speak up.
"We should go get Quatre." Genesis moves to the door.
"Do you think he'll know how to help?" Duo was curious if Quatre would even know.
"I don't know I just wanted to grab his fine ass before Trowa does." She turns and runs out the door.
Mean while in the kitchen....
"Duo, you little baka, hand me the strawberries from the fridge." Wufei orders as Quatre sets the timer on the microwave.
"Duo's not even here." He goes to the fridge and opens the door. "Can you give me the strawberries please?" He asks the mayonnaise.
"Sure, so you and that playboy chick having another romp night through the house, again?" It's goopy arms drip as Quatre takes the strawberries out.
"No we're making strawberry daiquiris, margaritas, and squishies!" Quatre smiles happily ^_^. (Ain't he just adorable!)
"Sounds like fun." It smiles too.
"How's the kids?" Quatre strikes up polite conversation.
"The little mold patch is growing nicely. We're really happy, but sadly living in this part of the neighborhood we lost one." Water droplets rolls down the jar.
"Ohh no," Quatre gasps. "How?"
"Damn it kid are you dumb? Can't you see I'm upset?" Quatre backs off as tears fill his eyes. "Yesterday, oh god, the women...what did she look like? Oh yeah, she had long brown hair in a braid and had such pretty eyes. Man, I was really getting off on that and she dived a spoon right in me, it felt so good." The mayo starts rubbing itself. "She lifted out a little part of the mold patch and slapped it on a sandwich. Oh yeah, she spanked it good. Then she spread it, and laid that bread on good all soft and warm. Then took that huge, umm oh yes, and chewed slowly just how I like it. Mmm, yes that's it. (Squishing noises) Oyo, yes daddy likes that. Watching them lips move and cover the whole thing. (Squish, squish) She deep throated the whole thing and swallowed." It's story is beginning to frighten Quatre's inner child so he starts to back away as the *squish, squish* becomes louder and faster. Little chunks of mayonnaise go flying out everywhere and splashing him in the face with it's white, thick, goodness.
"Nataku, Quatre, what is taking so long?!" He whirls around to come face to face with Quatre splotched with white dripping lumps like a Dalmatian.
"The mayonnaise got a little over excited." Quatre murmurs feeling violated as Wufei stares at him mouth agape in disgust. He snatches the strawberries from him and starts to sort them out. He is still embarrassed about their last little adventure when he had wild sex with the washer, streaked through the house, and started a porn web page called 'the Chicksie Dicks'. He was amazed he could even manage to type let alone create a ten-page web site dedicated to cheese covered transvestites. Most of the things that happened he couldn't remember so they had to show him what the security cameras caught. They were all acting a little funny.
"Quatre, Wufei, come quick something's wrong with-" Juggles stops at the sight of Quatre. "Umm...?"
Quatre stops wiping his self off to answer. "The mayonnaise was getting off on Duo."
"WH-WHAT?!" Duo sputters as they enters the kitchen.
Genesis walks up by Wufei and pets the squid. "I can't believe you're making this thing as a snack?" She was talking to Wufei.
"It is a delicacy so shut up!" He has a butcher's knife in his hand.
"Smella like pussy," Trowa walks in. Wufei is fuming and wings it across the room at his head. It misses as Trowa does his famous acrobatic flip into the air only to slip on a banana peel. He lands flat on his back silent.
"What's wrong with Heero?" Quatre finishes cleaning himself up with the teletubie dishrag.
"He's like a zombie or somethin'. His eyes are all wide," Juggles pulls her eyes wider, "he has no expression-"
"So what? Yuy usually never does." Wufei interrupts.
"BURN!" Duo cheers.
"Well, he's...umm...well he's actually not too different then how he really is, but get this when I mooned him he didn't even blink!" Juggles gets right in Wufei's face and getting closer.
Duo and Trowa shrug, taking a glance at her hind quarters. "Don't look so bad to me?" Duo must say.
"So what do we do about Yuy?" Wufei takes Juggles off of him and sets her on the counter. They all look around the room and Genesis walks over to the blender to get a sip of the margarita mix.
"Maybe we need to-ahh o_o!" She jumps, her hair on end like a Halloween cat.
"What is it?" Quatre didn't want anything to be wrong with his love muffin.
"Something pinched my ass!" She steps away from the counter.
"Wufei!" Juggles laughes. Genesis looks around, eye twitching from annoyance.
"Let's get serious and quit grabbing Genesis's ass. We need to do something about Heero!" Quatre takes charge.
Back in the living room......
"There, he-he-he."
"Hold him still..."
"Shh..."
"Ha ha, he's going to be sooo pissed."
"We'll have to watch our backs."
"If he ever wakes up."
"Every man for himself."
"I'm not a man."
"We can see that."
"Don't stare at my boobs!"
"But they're just so...there."
"Quiet you two or three? Trowa what are you doing?"
"Putting a banana in his pants."
"Why?" Trowa just shrugs.
They all step back satisfied with the cruel trick they had done to the drooling Heero. He has fag, I love mommy, dick tastes good, and I fucked Quatre written all over his face in red marker. His shirt was turned inside out; fruit is in his pants, and his hair put in bows. His toes were decked out in whip cream and a cherry has been placed in his belly button. There's ketchup dripping from his nose and eyelashes drawn on him. A happy face across his belly smiles up as a skirt is placed around his thighs. His own underwear has also been put over his head.
"Job well done!" Juggles dusts off her hands.
"Trowa, why did you pierce his nipple?" Genesis has to know.
He just shrugs, "wanted to see if he'd wake up?"
"What do we do now?" They all turn to one another dumb founded.
"Have an idea." Duo exchanges glances with Juggles and they both nod.
Later on the couch...............ok not much later.
They sit there in a frenzy of giggles and chuckles as a light fog coats the room. One little light barely shines in the smog that lingers. Duo passes the little white stick to Genesis and Genesis passes it to Quatre and Quatre to Trowa and Trowa to Juggles then Juggles to Wufei and back again.
"Shh, shhe, you guys, hey puppy!" Zech's bloodshot eyes light up. They all burst up in laughter, practically rolling on the floor. No one had noticed he had showed up.
"Zechs what are you doing here?" Quatre squirms out before coughing.
"You take it like a pussy!" Zechs grabs the joint from Quatre. "Well bitch, Relena had me bring her here so she could see Heero. Man, this parties the shit." He laughes as he fell over on the floor his elegant blonde hair draping his face. Relena is in the background trying to give Heero CPR and crying loudly like an idiot. Dorothy sits in the corner snuffing something up her nose.
"Hey-hey-hey, now (gulp) Dorothy you can't be bringing that shit up in here. I don't allow drugs; (laughing to Duo) I know I know, in my house-e." Genesis snatches Quatre by the back of his pants so he won't fall over while he points as he speaks to Dorothy.
"What? Me?" She spins around acting as innocent as a innocent Mormon wife with a pixie stick spilling out her hand.
"Bring me some Kool-Aid!" Duo shouts. Genesis, Juggles, Wufei, Zechs, and everyone else, but Duo all head to the kitchen.
In the kitchen they all spread out. Genesis dives into the freezer, Juggles digs into the cabinet, and Dorothy puts her head in the microwave. (If only it could be turned on)
"I gotta take a leek." Quatre confesses using Genesis to keep from staggering over while going to the door. "I don't wanna go alone. Who's going to come wit me?" All the guys go with him to the bathroom, including Dorothy.
Quatre enters the bathroom and starts to pee. Zechs marches over and leans against his shoulder like and old buddy. "Man you gotta put the seat up." Quatre looks at his shoes that are now dripping with yellow.
Wufei just keeps walking blankly trips into the bathtub. "Evil warrior! Help me some one! Come to my aid!" Trowa rushes over and starts a fight with the shower curtain. He falls over away from the bathtub, dragging the curtain with him that's entangled around his legs, getting his ass kicked. Zechs flings open the cabinet door and starts searching through the pills. Nodding at a few he pockets one or six bottles.
"Hey! Hey you!" Quatre looks down into the bowels of the toilet. His eyes widened in shock as he stumbles away from it. "Good, stop urinating on me." The feminine voice echoes and sounds quite familiar. Dorothy runs over, pushing Quatre down, and her eyes sparkling with admiration.
"Brittany Spears! I'm your biggest fan! Can you sign something for me?" She chided to the head sticking out of the toilet.
"Sure what?" Dorothy about-faced and rears up her skirt.
"Can you sign my ass please?" Brittan pulls a marker out from no where and happily signs. "Always happy to meet a fan."
Zechs comes over and shoves Dorothy out of the way. "What are you doing?!" Brittany spears screeched.
"I haveta take a piss so either you suck or I flush!" She thinks about his proposal for a second.
Wufei stands hunched over with his butt sticking out. Trowa finally manages to get back up to find him in such an awkward position. "What are you doing?"
"There's a villain in my anal passageway. I heard him. He taunts me like a...vile person!" from his hole something very huge and frightening emerges. Hair, eyes, a nose, glasses and grinning mouth then came into view.
"Who is that?"
"Hi, I'm Berry Boswick." The man with glasses introduces himself to Trowa.
"Who's Berry Boswick?" Trowa asks and Berry frowns.
"He's Berry Boswick you dumb ass! What's in my ass?" Wufei's face twists in pain.
"Please help me I've been stuck up there for days. It really smells and I just want to get out so I can go home to my wife and children!" The man pleads.
Wufei objected. "No, Trowa help me vanquish this parasite in my ass! We can do it together. Or else I'll kill your beanie baby!" Trowa gasps at Wufei's evil threat. He walks over behind Wufei.
"No, no please no!" Berry begs one last time.
"Sorry, I just love my Goochi (the jellyfish) too much." He bends down and begens to push Berry's head in with his shoulder. When he is almost all the way up there Trowa drops his pants and stuck it in, because his hand would no longer fit.
Quatre begins weeping ass, I mean as* two big monsters hovered over him.
Meanwhile, err...not meanwhile but next in the kitchen.....
Juggles stares off into the lower cabinet gets up off the floor she put as she pops a Pringle in her mouth and turns to Genesis. "What did we come in here for?"
Genesis finally pulls her head out of the freezer with ice crisping her hair and Moose Tracks ice cream all over her face. "I don't know, but I think I gotta use the restroom." They both leave hypnotically to the same bathroom.
Banging on the door, "Hey get out we needs to use the restroom!"
Genesis opens the door when Quatre pops out, clutching something to his chest. "Quatre, what are you doing with the bathroom scale?"
Quatre wines like a child. "It's my only friend."
"OK?" Juggles goes around him into the bathroom. Quatre dashes off down the hall with the bathroom scale.
Inside Juggles hits Zechs on the shoulder. "Zechs get outs." She speaks mildly and lazy eyed.
Zechs has his hands behind his head and his face grinning with pleasure. "Just hold on one more minute." She rolled his eyes at him. "Ok we're done." Brittany Spears wipes off her mouth and Zechs flushes the toilet. *Whoosh down she goes just like her album sales. Genesis taps on Trowa's back as he's standing at the sink eating toothpaste. He turns without a word and leaves.
"Owe!" Her hands fly to cover her behind.
"Nice ass," Zechs has a smirk on his face as he saunters away.
"Does everybody have to grab my ass tonight?" Genesis wonders aloud.
Outside the bathroom door they hear a crazy yell. "Hey, who shit in the bathtub!" Juggles shrill voice echoes through the hall.
Since they were all gone...
Duo sputters, choking on his own spit as his head was cocked back on the couch. He shoots up hacking up drool, dripping over his lip. His eyes are still a little puffy and a little blurry as he drags his feet into the kitchen. He squints at the sight of the bright light compared to the dim glow of the dark living room. He trips over the banana peel and opens the fridge as he catches himself on the handle. A clump of mayonnaise splatters him in the face when he checks inside. He slams the fridge door shut and heads to the cabinet. Pringles fly out in a barrage of attack and he slams the door shut quickly, leaning against it very confused. He feels daring enough to keep searching for munchies. He opens the top cabinet and his half cupped eyes became titanic as a can of green beans smacks him in the head. He falls over out like a light.
When does this story end....
Back in the room where Heero still lays with Relena weeping over him pitifully (or more like over dramatically, I mean he isn't dead for god sakes!). Zechs sits down on the couch with a bag of Fritos and Genesis curls up with the Cheetos. "Let me have one?" Trowa asks but Genesis just growls at him so he backs off. They turn to Dorothy who has been starring at the TV. They all looked at her like she is really a retard.
"I'm losing my buzz." Quatre sighs as he plops down on the couch between Zechs and Genesis, resting his arm on her butt. "There really isn't much else to do now that the war is over. I feel like I lack meaning. What's a Gundam Pilot to do?"
"Here, take these two together and you'll so be feeling go_od." He places a white and a red plus yellow pill in Quatre's hand the stash hidden in his pants. Quatre shrugs and gulps them back. Zechs is an ally he can trust him.
"I don't feel any different." Quatre states blandly.
"Just wait for them to kick in. They're not Speed, you know!" Zechs informs him. Quatre shrinks back into the couch and waits quietly.
Dorothy suddenly jumps up from the TV and turns to them. "I know where Heero's brain went! I just saw it in Barney's play land! That fucking bastard took his brain!" She hold up her fist in anger then spins to strike a pose. "We must retrieve it!"
As is customary for them to take a diplomatic vote they all glance around at one another and shrug. . .again. "All right Dorothy, anything to shut you up." Genesis agrees. Her, Trowa, Wufei, and Juggles all go over to her.
Relena pops up her eyes disgustingly all puffy and red like overripe tomatoes. "I'm coming too. I must save my true love's life!" They roll their eyes at her.
"That's great Miss Relena, you're so brave! You're my hero! I love you!" They all take a step back away from Dorothy as she gushes over nothing.
"Ok, now how do you suppose we go in there?" Genesis folded her arms.
Dorothy thinks for a second then pulls the pixie sticks out of her pocket. "Here snuff, I mean stiff these," she hands them each one. "They'll give you psycho kinetic powers!" They inspected over them over as Dorothy demonstrates. After a slight hesitation of concern that it was a extremely stupid idea like trying to ride a skateboard onto a railing while intoxicated, BUT they all go with the theory of "what could it hurt." It's not like they had any other bright ideas as to how to get in there.
In one big snort and fiery, burning sensation they look to the TV and dive into the space/time warp. Inside the world is so bright and cheery it's making these teens from a depressing, war torn world sick. Barney comes out of the school. "Howdy boys and girls, ha yuck!" (I don't know how Barney talks I stopped watching the show when I was 6 and even then I liked Lamb Chops Play Along better. I kind of imagined him sounding like Goofy.)
Wufei screams and ducts behind Dorothy. "You brought us here now do something, baka. Scare him away with your freaky eyebrows and ugly face! Or try this: come on to him so he will go away." He cowers. "What evil is this?"
Juggles looks around only to run off, grinning wide. Genesis rolls shakes her head as she and Trowa approach Barney. "Listen, you stankin purple blob, give me Heero's brain or I'll fuck you up!" She stares straight into his fuzzy, lint covered face. Barney is covering where his ears should have been with his hands.
"Bring it on bitch I'll fuck you all right!" Barney catches them all by surprise. "Sick them, you little bastards!" He orders and five kids, that were more like 12-15 years old, came out. "Now attack or I'm having your sweet little ass' for dinner!"
The kids all appear very frightened. "No please not again, big daddy Barney!" They attack. Trowa and Genesis easily throw them all around. Out of the garbage can pops that green thing...umm...shit what was his name? Oh, ya, Oscar the grouch and Elmo, the alien thing, pop up.
"Elmo's going to kick your ass!" Elmo speaks in the 3rd person, because he has a deep rooted personality complex probably due to sexual abuse as Oscar pets his red head lovingly. Succumbing to gravity Big Bird falls out of the tree and the teletubies spring out of the ground one up top the other.
"My god how gay are these characters?" Genesis eyes bug out.
Trowa calls back to Wufei, "We're going to need your help so get out from under Dorothy's skirt!" Wufei peeks out and goes to attack the enemy behind him.
"What the hell are you?" He asks the yellow rat with a spiky tail.
"Pikachu!" It screams the only thing it could amazingly say and shocks him with a mighty bolt of lightning.
"Owe, that hurt!" He punts it out of the school yard like a football. Trowa is caught by Big Bird who held him back by his arms so the Teletubie, Tinky Winky (giggle), can work the gut. Genesis takes on the fuzzy things in the garbage can.
"You afraid bitch?" His scratchy voice asked her. She picked up a branch, slammed down on the can top, held it down, and banged on the can with the stick. She then tipped it over and sent it rolling down the hill that appeared from no where. She then turned to Barney knowing that Wufei was helping Trowa by jumping on the teletubies back and beating him on the head and whipping out all kinds of Karate moves. Dorothy was actually doing her share by slicing the Rugrats in half with her razor sharp eyebrows and poking some eyes out. It was some really bloody stuff, man.
"Give us the brain, fag ass, or I'll make you extinct along with yo momma!" Genesis threatened Barney. (note: Barney the dinosaur was originally played by a gay black man. Thanks for the reality check mom that's good to know when your in first grade.)
He pretends to quiver and cry in his cowboy boots. "Don't be talkin' bout my momma. My momma's dead! That fucking comet wiped them all out!"
"Give us the brain, son!" Trowa kicks Big Bird in the stomach and yells at him.
"I ain't got no brain." Big Bird cries.
"No kidding! Damn it, Dorothy! You drag us all the way here and they don't even have his stupid brain!" She nocks Barney out, "That's for grabbing my ass! Go to hell!" She walks over to Trowa.
"Wufei stop kicking him and come on." Wufei is kicking the hell out of the passed out and half dead green teletubie. They start to head towards Dorothy when Wufei runs back and begins kicking it again. "Okay, Wufei, stop! I think he's had enough!" They both have to grab him in order to drag him away as he's still kicking. He takes off his shoe, throws it, and hits it in the head.
"Let's go Dorothy. Where's Relena?" Dorothy turns around and points. Relena is getting her ass literally kicked by chibi Dragon Ball Z peoples.
"Help me!" She cries put. From the bushes there's a rustle. Out comes the Oompa Loompas.
"Hell na," Dorothy yells at them. "What are they doing following us?" They move up and snag poor Relena.
She begins kicking and screaming, "NO, not again!"
"Oompa Loompa doopity doo, I've got another lesson for you. What do you get when you run away. Getting caught by the pound like a dirty stray? Tied up and whipped in our dominatrix place. (deep voice) Then we brake your fucking legs off. Oompa loompa doopity doh, we don't feel like singing so lets freakin go!" They disappear back into the bushes.
"Why do they always do that?" They all look back at Dorothy. "They never sing on key and you know they are so making it up as they go along!"
"Who cares! Juggles, where the fuck are you?" Genesis is growing impatient.
"Over here!" They spot her over on the play set. She's hanging upside down on the handle bars.
"Juggles, get your ass down! What are you doing up there?"
"I wanted to play! Oh, and I also found Heero's brain! It was having a tea party with John Stamose and Cameron Dias!" It's funny how they're all shocked that Juggles wasn't lying after everything that has happened.
"Juggles, snatch the brain and run!" Juggles nods and snatches the brain dressed in a bonnet. The Earth trembles as a giant boulder rolls at them. They leap for dear life, but can they make it through the wormhole in time?
Back outside the TV...
Quatre sits happily singing, "Blues clues, Blues clues!" He is rocking in beat side to side and his pupils take up most of his eye. "Welcome back! That sure looked like a fun adventure! Zechs was right about those pills I feel happy! Look he's even doing a funny little dance!" Zechs is foaming at the mouth, having a seizure. It had become so violent he shook off the couch and is now twitching on the floor.
"What happened to Mr. Milliardo?" Dorothy gasps.
Quatre smiles ear to ear. "Skittles. He had a rainbow mix of colorful fun. Like what he gave me except a lot more!" A group exchange of glances agrees nobody really cares so move over to Heero.
"Hey stop that!" Juggles squeals. They whirl around to see Wufei chewing on Heero's brain.
"What?! It's a delicacy!" He spits blood as he speaks. Daggers are glared at him. Juggles takes the brain and sticks her tongue out at him.
"What do we do now?" Juggles asks while setting the brain on Heero's head.
"Remember the last time someone said that?" Genesis intervenes.
"That doesn't matter now c'mon!" Trowa tries to think for a second. "We have to get it back into his head."
"Well duh," Genesis had her hands on her hips. "But how?"
The room is silent. "We force it back in. Through his ear. That might work." They all agree with the only suggestion Trowa could think of and come reach another block.
"How?" Juggles is the first to ask. Again the room is cast in silence, ignoring Quatre's singing of Nelly Furtado's 'I'm like a bird'.
Wufei speaks up. "How about we have Genesis sit on it!" They all start laughing.
"That's it! Fuck all! I'm sick of your perverted deals with my ass!" With that she storms out the room.
"Then how about Dorothy? She has a fat ass." Wufei points.
Dorothy dances over, eying him happily. "Do you mean I have a phat ass as in Pretty Hot And Tempting?"
Glances are exchanged. "No I meant fat as in F.A.T., Fat Ass Teen. So sit that dump truck down on Heero's head." Wufei brings her down with the harshest of force. She mumbles complaints under her breath as she takes a seat on Heero's soft brain.
Nothing happenes. "Now what?" Dorothy is very embarrassed (he-he).
"We eat it!" Wufei says eagerly drool over flowering his mouth and a ravenous glint as Juggles had to hold him back.
"I got it! Bounce on it a little to wedge it in!" Juggles figures it out. "Bouncing always gets me the best results when I want something!" Dorothy commences bouncing.
"That's one stubborn brain." Trowa grabs her shoulders to bounce her harder. *Whoomp*, in it slides. Dorothy rolls off and Heero as he sits up. His eyes are enormous when he opened his mouth to say something.
"Cagier Party!" He throws one hand in the air and all the characters, excluding Relena, all cheer, "Yay!"
"You think we put his brain in the wrong way? He's acting fun." Juggles notices.
"Who cares? Yuy is never this free-spirited. I say go with it!" Trowa points out.
Sometime the next morning...the end is near...
The next morning they all wake up one by one. Duo gradually opens his eyes and smells something funny. Next to him is an empty jar of mayonnaise and the white stuff is in his pants. "What in the hell did I do?" He starts coughing up jelly. Juggles lifts herself out of the windowsill and take the oxygen tank attached to her ear.
Quatre rolls over on the dog and jumps up. "Awe, what's that horrible smell?" He then lifted Genesis off oh him and she throws the umbrella she finds in her underwear across the room. Wufei stumbles over the couch and tries to pee on the living room fern through his pink spandex short shorts.
"It tastes like I ate an ashtray." Heero rubs his head and spits out a cigarette butt. Zechs unsticks his limp dick from the vacuum cleaner and pulls the arm of an Oompa Loompa's out of his ass. Trowa steps out of the closet with Juggles' bra on his head and Dorothy's skirt around his chest, but other than that he's naked.
"That was one hell of a cager." Dorothy sits up, her head swerving around as she falls back with her hair a mess and a goat nibbling on her toes that are covered in cream cheese.
Soreya walks into the house followed by Gedra and both are amazed at the total disaster area the house had become. It was like a petting zoo in the middle of a nuclear waste dump. There were two goats, a dog, six chickens, and a donkey with the words 'Zechs was here' painted on that ass. The couch had been set on fire, beer bottles, food, balloons, broken pottery, and Christmas decorations dashed everywhere. Dancer and Donor both had 'Heero was here' on them.
Next they dare to go in the kitchen. In the kitchen Duo is seated on the floor and there is even more food splattered all over. The washer has been moved next to the doorway with the words 'Wufei was here, Nataku' written on it. A duck swims in the sink and the side door left wide open. A computer hangs out the window by it's powercable and the big screen TV is shattered by the baseball bat that rests inside it. (Death to the TV, I guess. Too many subliminal messages.) Heading upstairs where underwear and other "things" litter the floor the two girls carry down an intact TV and VCR. They hook it up quickly and gather the half-dazed, hung-over whiney people who all have headaches in the dinning room. The only place not covered in Kool-Aid. They all sit around the huge table, eyes bloodshot, clothes wrinkled, and hair everywhere.
"What time in the morning is it?" Duo ponders, rubbing his head with one eye shut.
"It's 3 in the afternoon." Gedra corrects him.
They all moan. "It's too early," Juggles wines.
"What do you want?" Heero mumbles grumpily with his head on the table.
Soreya nods to Gedra and she pushes a red button on the VCR. "We video taped all you guys last night being complete jack ass'. Enjoy!" Pilot steps out of the way and the screen goes from fuzzy to black then loud, warped music plays. The party animals gawk at seeing themselves doing all kinds of crazy things. Wufei was peeing on the dog, Zechs was having sex with the goat, Juggles was running around topless with a beer in her hands and Trowa was holding her up in the air. Heero had a lampshade on his head and set the couch on fire. Genesis was doing shots when she turns around and grabs the baseball bat. She went around smashing everything in sight. Then Quatre and her start to get buck-wild.
"That's why there was an umbrella in my underwear!" Genesis jumps up as she sees Dorothy stick it in her pants. The camerawomen heads into the kitchen where Wufei was riding the washer and eating a box of Coco Puffs. Duo was whacking off with the mayonnaise while swallowing whole clumps of jelly and smearing it on the walls.
"Man, I'm never getting high again." Duo leans on his elbow almost falling out of the chair.
"Weed doesn't do this." Gedra looks at them confused.
"I can't believe we went through six caigs!" Dorothy bends over and throws up.
"Beer doesn't just get you to do all this either." Gedra speaks up again scared at what they had really done to get like that.
They all look over at Juggles. "What?! It's not my fault my dealer laces everything!" They all slam their heads on the table in exhaustion. "Look, Duo, you're fucking a Horny Duck!" Juggles points out.
"And you're helping!" Duo finished.
"I didn't know Lady Une and Noin were strippers!" Quatre faints with a bloody nose at the sight.
"Eeuuuww!!" They all gag.
"They are way too old to be wearing those outfits! Middle-age spread, anyone?" Gensis shivers.
"Trowa! So that's how you got my skirt on!" Dorothy slaps him. They get in an uproar when Heero noticed something.
"What the hell is written all over my body?!" He finally notices and inspects himself. The room completely clears out in an instant. Heero stands up.
"Is the party over?" Sierra crawls out from under the table. He helps her out and they leave out the front door after his frightened friends. Out into the world they decend, out into the world of blue and yellow, purple pills, oops, I mean Hills.
I don't know if this turned out the way I wanted, because I didn't have a clue how or what I was writing about. This was kind of a run off of "Search for the Leprechaun" and was written only a few months after so it's that old.. This had no point, reason, story line, or detail. This was mainly a retarded comedy that made absolutely no sense! As you can tell I was really bored. At least it's funny, right? Well I love feedback, come to think about it I'm kind of hungry so message me and I'll get back to you. If N-E 1 is wondering why I write these it's just for the shier thrill of it and not many people write like this or like this. Not many people in their right mind would. Umm...ba-bye ^-^