A/N: This is my first Glee story, and I have been really disappointed by the lack of Puck/Quinn so far this season and decided to take it out through a little bit of Puck angst.
Disclaimer: The amazingness that is Glee, does not belong to me!
What is it about him? What does he have that I don't? Well, other than that stupid Bieber hair, but I can't see the appeal in that. Why does she get to be his while I'm stuck banging Santana for a distraction? I'm not an idiot despite what people seem to think. I knew there was no way Quinn would take me back as the poor, angry, criminal straight out of juvi, so I had planned to lay low for a while; let everything simmer down and show her that I was still the guy she loved.
I was still the guy that had held her for hours that first night back from the hospital after we gave away our Beth. I was the one who had wiped her tears and quietly sang to her for those nine hours, not Sam. He didn't even know her then! He didn't know how beautiful she had looked while carrying my Beth. I bet he has never even seen her without her makeup and hair perfect; let alone crying and scared.
Did he know what kind of coffee she liked? I doubt it. I knew he wouldn't be willing to get up half an hour early to drive to the Starbucks in the next town over, buy one for her, and sneak it into her homeroom every morning. Did he know that from the time I got my drivers license, whenever she would get upset she would call me? We would sneak out in my truck and drive around for hours listening to the radio and looking up at the stars through the windshield, not talking, until she fell asleep with both my letterman's jacket and my arm around her shoulders; her head on my chest.
She was supposed to be with me, damn it! I've known it since we were just kids. Second grade to be exact. I was her first, we had a child together! Even if we didn't keep her, there was no denying that I loved that little girl and I loved her mommy. I still do. I loved her enough to let her go be with Sam. I guess I just thought that she would always realize that she wanted me instead; that she needed me instead.
It wasn't until I saw her today, in that church for Finn and Kurt's parent's wedding, that I realized that she truly didn't care. She walked down the aisle with Sam, singing, twirling in that gorgeous red dress, smiling, and happy. When I walked down that same aisle with Santana moments later my eyes were on Quinn. And Quinn's eyes were on Sam. It was then that it hit me, that there may be a chance that she really has moved on. I had always expected that the first time we were both in a wedding together it would be our own and she would be looking at me like that, with that gleam of love in her clear blue eyes.
And then the next day when she pranced into glee club showing off her precious diamond, I felt my heart sink to the floor and shatter. He had promised her his unconditional love and she had accepted. That should have been my ring on her finger. God knows I tried to put one there…
I was the one she called that night she took the pregnancy tests, all 12 of them. I drove, and she cried. For the first time on any of our midnight drives, I pulled off and parked. It was in the middle of an open field, with the Ohio moon pooling around us that I dropped to one knee and took her hand. I promised to love both her and the baby forever but she stopped me before I could slip my class ring onto her hand. She said she couldn't let me do it. She couldn't let me take pity on her and she would not marry me simply because we were going to have a baby. She said that after we graduated, if I still wanted her she would take me up on my offer. I kissed her hand and promised to wait forever for her.
I guess she forgot about that night; about that promise. I didn't.
I'm not saying that I deserve to be with her, because I know I don't. But why does he? What makes Sam so qualified that he is able to call her his girlfriend? I could make myself be happy for them if I knew that what they had was real, but it wasn't. The girl he was in love with wasn't the real Quinn. She was just a cover-up. She was just the shell that MY Quinn had created to hide all the little things that she considered flaws; all those funny little quirks that made up the woman I loved.
She loves him, as hard as it is for me to say I know that it's true. But he doesn't love the real her. So when he realizes this, he is going to leave her, just like I have watched so many other guys do to her in the past, only this time it's going to be worse because she didn't really love any of them. And when he does, I will be the first person she calls.
I will drive over to her house and watch her sneak out the back door and climb into my truck. I will reach her my coat and put my arm around her and she will cry into my shoulder as the miles go by. When she's finally asleep I'll start home, and then wake her up when were on her block. She will yawn and rub her eyes with the back of her fists like a sleepy little kitten and offer me my jacket back, even though she knows I always tell her she can keep it till morning. I will wait for her to cross the driveway and unlock the door because I will always make sure she is safely inside before I start up my truck and pull away from the curb.
When I get home it will be almost dawn, so I'll shower and get my stuff, leave a note for Mom saying I left early to finish some made-up assignment, and then I'll drive for half an hour each way, just to buy her that coffee. The one that I will leave sitting on her desk in homeroom so she will have a reason to start out the day with a smile. All because she will always be the love of my life.
Drop me a review and let me know if you like it! I'm considering writing a second chapter from Quinn's PoV, so let me know what you think!