7r33 f1ddy $h d35 0f 41tl3r

by

dj rody rod

I was a young man in 1935 I had just gotten out of skool with a degree in all da science sure it took me 8 years to do it but I did it. Oh I forgot to tell you my name it is

N3$$y I this (holds up 26 fingers) many years old. I had decided to move to Germany after they had lost ww1 because it was cheap to live there because of all the money they owned and I started up a research lab with the money I made from working the streets selling drugs and working the sheets. With this lad I had the intention of making a cloning machine. I had gathered up a small team to help. There was BRÜNHILD,DIEDERICH, ECKBERT,GERTRUD, and Dave. At first life in Germany was not bad I had enough money to buy what we need the people in town were nice but I never told them I was merica as a bold eagle fucking an apple pie. Things were good from those first 5 year till we started running out of money. Which lead me to make a deal with a some nice guyz who fonded the research lab but that is a story for another camp fire.

You got the camp fire going big booooya now were was I oh. I was a young science in Germany those first five years were some of the best years of my life I knew all the shop kept like Goonter who ran the local tavern who always had a sad look on his face as bright as a pitch black room because the economy was in the shitter and he was a big old drunk. There was also this young star eyed painter named Adolf he was always meeting with people and later because the leader of Germany. But the high was over by 1940 my lab was out of my blood money everyone in my team left but dave who was to tied up to leave(literately). Then one day some really big man offered me and dave jobs at a new fun science camp they made. They had tons of money like a mega shit load like scrooge mcduck vaults amount of money how could I say no. Turns out it was a concentration camp keeping jews and other unwanted groups in germany but hey scrooge mcfuck it.

It was day on the job the enterance was "clean" , all the jews looked "happy" . Then some "friendly not scary" looking "gentlemen" helped me and dave to my new lab. I spent the first day set up the lab and I defiantly did not see like 5 different executes. The next day I showed the small scale cloning machine to the head of nazis science dr stickler or as I call him stick it my ass ler (hahaha I am a comedian I am going to make a vine account). After I showed it to him he said "I like what jew made here" I replied " do you really have to do that" "i dont know what jew are talking about" and I like " fine whatever now what". He then told me " its time jew went big or when with the others unwanteds" and then I am like " I dont even know if this will work on humans I am still studing how human dna works!" and than he is like" jewr going to have study more effectively then. Gunter bring him some samples" . After than I left his office and when I got back gunter had put like 5 dead jews on my lab table and I knew what they wanted I started to dissect the bodies. As I did it I told myself there was nothing I could do they were dead before I got here. After I had token all the note I could on the 5 dead jews I went to the mess hall with dave who couldnt watch me do it. While in the mess hall a group of fucking nerds bumped into me and dave then circled me there leader sheldon cooper then said to me " I hear your working on cloning 2" he then pointed to a near by table with my former team " I already know ever thing about cloning that you know bagnazgoogoo gaga"(insert laugh track) and I am like " fuk you m8 I am going to fuking rekt you mate so bad you mum is going to feel it when I fuk you in your arse you unfunny peace of fuking shit bitch wanker !" I then walked like a fuking b0ss.

I a month past sense then had pass I had understood a good chunk of human dna but I need to pick the test subject if I wanted to understood what I needed to aboot human dna. So I went dr stickler because if I dont keep up with what they need they will kill dave and I cant have that he was the only one who stood by me. so told dr stickler aboot that I need to pick the bodies I study and he gave me a half smile and said "if jew need to pick then jew need to kill them." I then fell to the ground and yell "khannnnnnnnn!" "do jew have a problem" I look down with eyes as hopeless as adam sandlers "carer" I say "yes I dont kill innocent people thats not what I do!" "gunter" then gunter proceeds to beat the living shit out of me till I cough up blood "do jew have a problem?" "No I understand you piece shit" "gunter I think jew need to teacher him some more respect". Gunter then kick more shit out of me till I am pretty sure he broke my ribs. "now what was that" " there is no problem sir" I then leave barely able to walk and go back to the labs and dave patch me up.

I eventually when looking for another specimen I fond the family that let me live with the when I first came to Germany and I snapped not like the pokemon game. I picked them as a my specimens and onto the way to the lab while be escorted by a Nazis solider. I punched him and took his gun a shot him. "run" I yell to dave and the family as we try escape from the city. We eventually make it to to the exit of the building I look at the family "I am sorry I never wanted this! I dont want to be this monster! dave take this gun and hide with the fam" I will take care of the guys outside" "but sir you cant take them all" "i know but I can make them think it was just me who snapped and you can escape during night fall." I look at the family"i am sorry Bellman's I never wanted put you in danger" fam looks at me " thank you for trying to get us out" "no problem I will see you on the other side" I smile and pick up a soldiers sub-machine gun kick open the door a yell " eat shit shitlords" I immediately get shot in the kidney and see old stick up the ass standing over me laughing.

Next thing I know I wake up in a darker room handcuffed to the the table and my feet chain to the chair. I wait for what felt like hours and finally stickler came into da room like walk in not cum in the room.

"so jew kill at 5 of my soliders and for what?"

"to get out of this hell hole and fuck your dad"

"jewr still a smart as I see"

"and your still a little bitch"

"so what did jew gain by this little outburst?"

"the pussy b0ss"

"i see jew dont want to talk fine but we found the family jew tried to save"

"you what? I will kill you if you touch them!"

"well no jew seem motivated to talk seriously." he crack a half smile

"what do you want?"

"i want jew to keep working on jewr cloning machine"

"fine If you don't hurt them"

" jew got it but I also I going to also have to punish you. Gunter bring in dave"

"you monster dont hurt him he was just fallowing orders!"

he just looked at me as he made dave get on his knee(not in that way you pervert) and put the gun to his had " dont stop trying to do good" bang

"now gunter take nessy out of here a finch his punishment" I spent the next 10 day in a room being water boarded, beaten, shocked, being show justin biebers nudes, and so much more ungodly things.

I spent months after my first escape attempt doing what I was told because they would kill more people then I would or kill the family that put me up for the first couple years in germany. But that changed when one of the jews handed me a note that told me that a group of jews that were fight the nazis and needed help mapping out the whole camp and needed a distraction to get out as many jews as possible. I agreed because why the hell not I got nothing but blood on my hand.

It took month to set up and coordinate with the Jewish army but I had it a perfect plan to get out. I spent the night building a bomb in sheldon cooper lab in his cabinet and turn my cloning machine in to a bomb. I then waited for the morning a put all my notes in to my bag and set the bombs off and ran. "bazanga" I picked up a gun and kept going to pick up the family. I almost made it to the family stickler was there waiting for me. "where do jew think jewr going?" "hell probable but I taking you with me" " gunter!" bang bang bang* and gunter was dead on the ground " how do jew like that big booooy"

stickler just stood there silent and I smiled "run" and he ran an I capped him in the knee "o jew dont kneed that" I say " now least see the all thing gunter taught me in that room" he screamed and scream till he died in my hand as I cut and fingered his wounds. I than I left with the family. After it was over the parents of the family decided to stay with the Jewish army but asked me to take there son with me to America till the war was over and I agreed. I then left Germany and headed back to America and meet back up with my friends and family and waited for the war to be over. (wait where is hitler its titled tree fiddy shades of hilter) [to be contined..] (oh your back to the future now ending on a to be contined this is shit rushed shit)