"Please don't do this. Please. I love you." My face was crumpling.
"Don't. You. Dare," Maxon ordered through gritted teeth. "You put on a smile, and you wear it to the last second."
I blinked away the tears and gave a weak smile.
"That'll do. Don't let that slip until you leave the room, do you understand?" I nodded. He looked into my eyes. "I'll be glad when you're gone."
After he spat out those last words, his smile returned and he faced Kriss again. I stared into my lap a minute, slowing my breathing and putting on a brave face.
The music started and smiles lit up Maxon's and Kriss' faces. I managed an unconvincing half-smile, half-grimace.
Gavril ran up to the stage, "Ladies and Gentlemen! It is the day all of Illea has waited for! Our dearly beloved prince has made his choice! One of these two ladies will be having her happily ever after with the handsome prince. To celebrate this happy occasion, let's revisit how these two ladies arrived on this stage today."
The lights on the stage dimmed, and behind Gavril, photos began to fill a screen. I gasped as a video of me and Ashley popped up, of our first breakfast in the palace. I had stayed mostly silent during the interview and it was striking how much I had changed since then. The screen changed to a video of Kriss and my eyes filled with tears as I thought of how brokenhearted I had been over Aspen. Regret at not telling the truth to Maxon immediately overwhelmed me. I blinked away the tears and saw the photo of Maxon and I's official photo, where I wore the sash. A few moments later was a video of Maxon and I dancing at the Halloween ball, arms wrapped around each other so tight it might have hurt.
A small sob slipped from my lips and Maxon whipped his head around to face me. He studied me, a frown on his face for the moment before the slideshow cleared and spotlights lit the stage once again.
Gavril spoke once again as I composed myself, "But without further ado, I would like to turn the microphone over to none other than Prince Maxon himself!"
Maxon stood up and walked in front of our small table.
"Thank you, Gavril. And thank you all for the well-wishes you have sent. I started with 35 women in the palace and have narrowed it down to these two lovely ladies." Gestured over to the Kriss and I. When his eyes reached mine they paused and I thought I saw a flash of pain cross his face, breaking his composure. Please, I begged him silently. He looked at Kriss, then back at me, slightly panicked, before regaining his smile and turning back to the crowd. He cleared his throat and knelt in front of Kriss.
My mind went blank. I couldn't think. I felt like I might hyperventilate and I clutched my seat, blocking out his words, until I heard the ones I dreaded most.
"Kriss Ambers, will you marry me?"
"Yes!" She squealed, throwing his arms around him. His face was turned towards me and he looked at me, although I couldn't read his expression. He pulled back and kissed her. I looked away, forcing myself to clap and smile.
When they broke apart, he turned to me. 'Lady America. Thank you for joining me at the palace. It has been a pleasure… to get to know you."
I stood up, curtsied, and walked away, leaving the two of them waving to the crowd.
Cameras followed me out of the room. "Lady America!" A reporter called. "Can we have a moment, please?"
I exhaled deeply, willing myself not to cry. When I had composed myself, I turned to the reporter, a dazzling smile on my face. "Of course."
"Lady America, have you enjoyed your time at the palace?"
"Very much so. Everyone has been too kind. But I am anxious to get back to Carolina and see my family."
"What will you do next?"
I stumbled over the question, "I haven't really thought about it." Because I thought I would be staying here. "I will spend time with my family and make a decision from there. I would like to continue with my music somehow."
Just then, Maxon and Kriss ran out of the room, smiling, Kriss clutching Maxon's arm.
"Lady America, how do you feel about the Prince's decision today?" The reporter asked, seeming to have not noticed the new arrivals behind him.
Maxon froze, looking towards me.
"I…" I stuttered. I swallowed, holding Maxon's gaze. "I think Kriss will make a wonderful princess. Prince Maxon is the kindest, most generous and sincere person I have ever met, and if I had one wish, it would be for him to be happy." Maxon looked pained and I shifted my eyes away, unsure how much longer I could maintain my façade.
"So did you know Prince Maxon would be choosing Lady Ambers today?"
Panicked, I stuttered, "I…. I…."
"There you are, America!" Celeste crooned, sweeping her arm around me. She batted her eyes at the cameraman, "America has a busy day ahead of her, I'd be happy to take any questions in just a moment."
"Thank you," I whispered in her ear as she pulled me into a hug and away from the cameras.
"You are going to be fine, I promise." She added, loud enough for Kriss and Maxon to hear, "We all knew you were the one for him, America. And if he doesn't see that, he doesn't deserve you."
After stumbling upstairs in a haze, I opened the door to my room to find Aspen and Lucy embracing. Shocked, I stood quietly at the door until they pulled apart and Aspen saw me and walked over, Lucy trailing behind, looking nervous.
"Mer," Aspen breathed. "I'm sorry. This is my fault…"
Rubbing my forehead, I said, "No, Aspen. It is mine. I should have told him a long time ago." Lucy came and hugged me before rushing out of the room.
"America…" Aspen said, reaching for my hand. "I've been needing to talk to you a while now. And today has really taught me something about being truthful. When I said that I'd always love you, I meant it. And I think if we had stayed in Carolina, we would have gotten married, and we would have been happy. Poor, but happy." He smiled sadly. "But we didn't stay in Carolina. And you've changed. I have, too. You'll always have a piece of my heart, Mer, but I'm not in love with you anymore. I think sometimes that you still need me or want me, but I don't know if that's right. You deserve better than me being with you because I feel obligated." He paused and smiled. "There's something else. You were right when you said that I'd never given anyone else a chance, and why would I have ever bothered except for all this happening?"
I held up my hand, putting the pieces together. "Lucy."
He nodded and I smiled. "I want to ask her to marry me," he said.
"Thank you, Aspen. For everything. Your friendship has meant so much and you couldn't have picked a better girl than Lucy. Take care of her, okay?"
His face fell, "Mer, I'm getting sent away to New Asia, remember?"
"Right." I sighed, trying to think of a way to remedy this. "This is my fault. I will try to fix it."
I walked down the hall towards where I knew the engagement celebration was being held. I peeked into the room and saw Kriss and Maxon dancing under glittering lights, surrounded by their families. I rubbed my forehead, trying not to cry. What was I going to do, barge in? I snuck away quietly and soon found myself in the garden, on mine and Maxon's bench. Overwhelmed, I put my face in my hands, wishing I could rewind this day and start again.
A few minutes passed and I heard footsteps. I looked up and saw a shocked Maxon.
"I thought you had left," he said.
"No. My mother is arriving shortly and I will be leaving soon. I actually was looking for you."
Surprise marked his features before he leaned against a nearby tree, crossing his arms guardedly.
"It's actually about Officer Leger." He huffed and turned to leave but I quickly continued. "I know you are mad at me, but please don't take it out on him. He's with Lucy now and I don't want…"
"What?" Maxon stood up straight. "What are you talking about?"
"My maid, Lucy? They are going to get married. If you send him away…"
Maxon groaned and sank against the tree, running his hand through his hair. He didn't say anything for a long time. "This morning, in the hallway?" he said softly.
"It was nothing. I'm sorry I lied to you about him, I was scared of how you would react. And for a long time, I wasn't sure what I wanted. Aspen was my safety net. But after the safe room…I knew you were the one… and I let him go." I was on the verge of tears, but tried to keep my voice steady. "So please. I'm not asking you to forgive me. But he deserves to be happy."
Maxon pressed his fists against his forehead, but didn't say anything.
"Maxon? Are you out here?" I heard Kriss' voice call.
I got up and started walking, not wanting to hurt Kriss by being here, but Maxon grabbed my hand. I looked down and saw pain etched across his face.
"He can stay," Maxon whispered.