- Little Time and Many Presents -
Mirana gifts her a castle (that's what she calls it but it's more like a very large house) and she can't very well say no because she is, after all, her sister, and the castle is quite cute and tiny with just enough space to make it through the doorways without bumping her giant head on the frame and so she lives there. Some part of Iracebeth wants to say no, however, because now that she lives in the heart of Underland, of her sister's land of Marmoreal, she can only pretend that she doesn't feel lonely instead of actually being able to be alone. So she dreams of her castle made of insects and only when some ants make a hill in the center of her backyard garden does she feel a little bit at home. They are pampered and she doesn't drown them or scorch them like she once would, once upon a time.
She is bitter and when no one is around she screams and throws fits because that is all she remembers how to do. Her bones ache and her head hurts and her stomach does flips because who is she if she is not the tyrannical ruler everyone hates? But something other than a lust for power fills her barely-there heart whenever Chessur visits and makes her laugh and she doesn't know what to make of it. It feels too nice and her body rejects it with caustic remarks and scowls.
But Mirana visits often and they share tea and she feels the anger slowly leave her body, except her head stays the same size so she's confused but it makes it all better when her sister stares at her with guilty eyes and apologizes for the mess she has made. It only helps a little bit, though, because her head is still giant and her sister is still pretty and beautiful and perfect and everyone loves her so most days she screams.
Tarrant makes her tiny hats because he knows she likes tiny things but they just make her head look bigger and she throws fits and refuses to wear them. She gifts them to her ants and the way they parade around in them makes Tarrant giddy with laughter and he swears he will bring fashion to the tiny bugs if it is the last thing he does. She kicks him out but continues watching them parade around in their little sinamays until the sun sets.
She doesn't go out often because although all of Alice's stupid friends don't seem to mind her that much, people still see her as the head-chopper and she likes the recognition but not the fruit thrown at her in the streets. Mirana's half-hearted attempts to make her subjects stop and see that her sister has changed and won't attack them outright doesn't work and they still hate her.
So she stays inside. It is isolated and lonely but it is also safe and why would she need love when she is safe? It makes no sense and she eats strawberries, pretending they are the hearts of non-existent admirers.
Time passes by and she thinks about him a lot because out of all of her lovers he was always the one that looked at her with admiration instead of undisguised contempt, or hate, without a hunger for power hidden in his eyes. She actually didn't mind his company all that much and perhaps he was no Stayne but his eyes were vibrant and he never cheated on her. She thinks about the way she was rude and mean and thinks it better that way because it means a clean cut, like a perfect beheading. No need for her to seek him out and see if would like to have dinner some time. She is not loved and he is just a reminder of that.
He is elusive and poignant and steady. She is a little neurotic and she, well, kind of used him - destruction incarnate - and she doesn't think he would want to see her all that much anyway, considering she killed everyone for a moment and never brought him any gifts even though he was so nice to her and made her tiny presents with his own hands.
Iracebeth keeps the little music box that he made her because she is very touched by it and she remembers the warmth of the blush spreading across her cheeks when he presented it to her, his eyes nervous and warm when he gazed at her, waiting for her approval. No one has ever bothered making something for her. It is in her garden because she is there most days and she likes to keep it close as a reminder that maybe someone did love her once upon a time and she is an idiot.
In-between her dreams of insect palaces she dreams of his eyes and his smile and her heart grows a size bigger but she doesn't think she likes it very much because it just aches all that much more.
Looking glasses are avoided and there are none in her house because if she looks at herself she knows she will hate it and probably punch the glass and make herself bleed. Some days the prospect doesn't sound so horrible but Mirana refuses to give her even a hand mirror – probably aware of her sister's self-destructive tendencies - so she doesn't bother with the possibility.
She pretends that as the days pass her head shrinks little by little and one day, when her heart is especially empty, she thinks she does feel it shrink a little smaller. It is less heavy on her shoulders. She tells her ants the news and dances to silent music.
She doesn't wear her make-up and lets her hair grow out in long waves without the heart in the middle because it's too recognizable and she actually wants to go out and buy new clothes sometimes without being stared at like she is a monster. She also dyes it black like the night sky, the infinite of Time, and to forget about red tarts and the past. She likes it and even though Tarrant says it reminds him of death she finds it suites her quite well.
She should know her disguise won't work because Mirana's peasants are not stupid and the mere size of her head makes her recognizable and she just feels frustrated when Mirana brings her new clothes to try on so she doesn't have to go outside.
She wants to keep trying but she's a coward and has given up on most things at this point. (Her house is littered with clocks that tick tock – if there is one thing she is still keeping track of it is the wasting away of Time.)
One day there is a knock on her door and she opens it to see electric blue eyes and a timid smile. She feels like she should have seen him coming because he is Time and Time is predictable but then again she supposes Time can be unpredictable when he sees it fit.
"You shouldn't be here," she says because she is just a little bit of a monster but her heart says no, no, stay! Because she knows she misses him and she feels like a jumbled mess at the moment when she sees him again.
He is so much more fabulous than she remembers and it is a reprieve; he is water and she is so, so thirsty that she drinks him up, how his shoulders are broad and his nose straight and aristocratic.
"Oh, well," he starts and she thinks he is regretting his decision already, "I had a spare moment so I thought I would… see how you are? You have a lovely little house." It is a mixture of pink and light blue.
Her heart thumps loudly, his accent thick, and she realizes he is waiting for her to let him in.
They haven't spoken in months (she would know) but it feels natural to be around him and she leads him to her garden and offers him tea politely (the way Mirana taught her) and introduces him to her ants and he is smiling the whole time. He notices the music box he made her from the corner of his eye and his smile only grows, if that is even possible. She doesn't know what there is to smile about because she is really a big mess and her dress is a little too big and her hair is in a lop-sided bun and –
"You look different," he tells her calmly, sipping away.
She touches her un-makeuped face and thinks she should have at least put on some kohl, "Well I am different I guess."
He gently touches the crown of her head with his long, long arms, "You don't have the heart-thing anymore. It doesn't seem very… you." She scowls fiercely.
"I'm not the old me anymore, am I?" He looks thoughtful at the rhetoric, "Not that I can see why you would want to see the old me. I was quite the bitch to you and all," he stays silent and his eyes are boring into her and she takes a deep breath," Sorry about the whole Chronosphere disaster, by the way. I'm embarrassed by it, and, well…" she blurts out when he doesn't respond and she curses because that definitely sounds like something the old her would say out of nowhere, blunt as ever, and she has none of the grace of her little sister.
She knows they have been avoiding the subject like an elephant but she feels better knowing she has said it. This way he can leave already and she can go back to being lonely and eating red cakes that make her want to vomit. He is Time and Time waits for no man but he probably would want an apology.
He shrugs, "I am past it. There is no use to live in the past, after all," she snorts at his pun, "You regret it, after all. What more is there to do, torture yourself? Bah, silly talk," he pauses a moment, "I like it, by the way, the hair and… it brings out your eyes." She blushes and she decides she likes Time and likes that Time seems to like her. He feels steady and she has to physically stop herself from leaning against him.
They spend the afternoon talking about tiny hats and tick tocks and she remembers all her manners and he kisses her knuckles when he leaves. Time is predictable and she is unpredictable and she likes it very much because it means that he always comes right on time and she has a new surprise for him every time he visits. Sometimes it is food she has (attempted) cooking and sometimes it is a gift.
She is not good with her hands but she grits her teeth and spends more time with Tarrant than strictly necessary so she can make him something handmade, too. Tarrant giggles, whispering about dreams and hands and she stops herself from slapping him one too many times for her liking.
It ends up being a very crude doll that is supposed to be Wilkins and it makes Tarrant laugh when she shows it to him, but when she presents it to Time his whole face lights up like starlight. She smiles back and that afternoon when the tea becomes cold, she does lean against him and he doesn't mind. Her face seems to be constantly warm in a blush.
She still doesn't go out much but she doesn't feel so lonely any more so she doesn't mind. A castle isolated that does not feel like isolation. She doesn't even mind when Tarrant bursts through her front door, screaming about how he has perfected mini dresses for her ants and storms into the backyard to begin his work. She, in fact, joins him.
Mirana smiles more because Iracebeth smiles more, and her tea tastes sweeter.
She feels like maybe she is perfect but she doesn't look in mirrors, and when she visits Time one sunny day in his faraway palace and accidentally looks at the mirror in his parlor she breaks down and cries. She almost – almost – forgets about her deformed head but seeing it now when she feels so pretty is a shock and she hates it all the more.
When he comes back into the room and sees her with bloody knuckles and shattered pieces on the floor and she screams at him that she is ugly and how can he stand to look at her face? He hugs her and pulls her close into his lap and she fights him but he is patient and lets her beat her fists against his chest until she is all tuckered out, like a spoiled child. She won't look at him but he takes the time to shush her until she is calm again and cleans the blood from her hands.
He tells her she is beautiful and she thanks him and leaves. But Time is predictable and he shows up at her castle of solitude anyway, and with it he has an arson of horrible puns that make her crack a small smile. She knows she is ugly and most days are hard but when Time is around she feels a little bit pretty.
She plays with his little music box when he is not around and she doesn't know if she'll behead anyone ever again but it's the thought that counts. Her heart doesn't feel so empty and it swirls and swirls in her chest at night and she feels like a little girl again, giddy and happy. It is foreign but slowly, slowly, she is letting Time in and he is filling her up with something that is not loneliness.
One day, when the guilt is eating her up he holds her hands and she tells him about how she killed Stayne and beheaded a few more people who made her mad, once upon a time, and he tells her about how he kills people every day and even though he tries it doesn't get easier. She sits in his lap and he massages her knuckles.
Mirana is pretty and gorgeous but Iracebeth doesn't feel so jealous anymore so the next time she comes over for tea and sister-time, she tells her as much. It is random and sudden and very much the only way Iracebeth ever lets her emotions out – sharp and brash. Mirana smiles and takes her sister's hand in her own. Iracebeth pretends to look haughty and that it doesn't matter but Mirana can see the smile twitching at the corners of her lips so she doesn't let go.
When Tarrant misses Alice she lets him make stupid-looking hats for her that she will probably never wear and Time notices it and he feels happiness blooming in his chest to know that Iracebeth is finding herself. He almost forgets he has a profound duty to the universe and finds himself trapped within her gravity.
The day he finds her sitting in her garden trying to knit a sweater that is much too large for any human being, and she blushes and tells him winter is coming and she doesn't want him to be cold when he visits because she will not be seen with a popsicle as a friend, he kisses her.
She starts, but soon she is kissing him back with fervor and she is in his lap, drinking him in. They stay locked together, lost and found, until they need to breathe again, and even then he steals a few more from her reddened lips because he can't get enough. Stars sparkle behind her eyelids and she feels electric, alive and profound and less human and more galactic. He rubs his nose against hers, whispers, "My little liebling," and she almost swoons.
She doesn't remember what lonely feels like and when she has to leave the house to get more tea because Mirana is busy and Tarrant is having his own weird little party with the rabbit and the mouse and she needs tea because Time will be visiting soon she doesn't mind all that much. She has a smile splitting her face the whole time, outshining the glares sent in her direction. On the walk back she gets less angry stares than on the walk out, and she leaves the house more and more and Marmoreal is so lovely in the spring. Her and Time walk about the town square occasionally and the warm breeze is relaxing.
And it was all meant to happen eventually, she will muse. When Tarrant visits, raving about tiny shoes and socks, he at first ignores her completely and dashes for the little ant kingdom in her garden. He stops, straight as a pin, and turns slowly around to stare at her and she is certain he has officially and truly gone mad. His makeup twists around his face in uncomfortable swirls. And when he whispers – almost in horror – that her head has shrunk she almost throws a fit because if there is anything she hates it is when her head is the center of the joke.
Before she can reach his throat to wring it he is out of her front door, leaving her angry and flustered in the doorway but he is back in a jiffy. Mirror in hand. Before she can realize it she is looking at her reflection but she doesn't flinch away because her head actually fits in the looking glass. Her eyes are wide and almost unseeing. She feels shocked. It must be an illusion, but the way that Tarrant is staring at her like he is about to vomit makes her let out a high-pitched careening whine.
Her head has shrunk! She wants to sing to the universe. She feels like her heart will explode.
She stares at Tarrant a moment before practically running to Time's palace, barreling into him with a smile that could move mountains, giggling and laughing because her head has shrunk! It is not quite the size it was when she was a child, but it is more than she had ever hoped for. Normal enough that her body feels like it all fits together and it is not a jumbled mess of mixed pieces haphazardly put together.
The invisible burden weighing down her shoulders is lifted and she is almost guilty because she was happy before, but now she is happy. So happy she feels like it will bubble over and consume her whole. She kisses Time and he kisses back and she knows she will never have enough of him, will always need him. She rushes to his parlor - his hand in hers - where he has replaced the mirror she broke, ripping the velvet cover off it so she can look at herself again. Look at Time's smiling, serene face behind her.
And he is happy but he is also nervous because every man in the Kingdom will want lovely Iracebeth now – those stupid, vapid fools - and how can he compete with handsome young men with money and time reserved only for her? It was never about her head but about her heart and he will be devastated if she ever leaves him. He knows he is trapped to his duty and cannot give her everything she wants and needs but he is dedicated and –
But when she visits him more often than she ever had and the slump in her shoulders is gone and her special smiles are only for him, he knows he has nothing to fear. (Her sewing has improved and his closet is filled with sweaters and gloves with pompoms on the end and he keeps asking for more.)
When he visits, there are looking glasses right alongside the clocks littering her house and it brings him peace.
She loves Mirana and Mirana loves her. She stands Tarrant enough to like him and he likes her ants enough to keep visiting her very, very often. She feels like she has a life now, sort of (mostly due to blue eyes and easy smiles). Chessur is there mostly to tease her about her love and she doesn't even mind all that much, except when he pops in when they are snogging in her garden.
People don't stare at her anymore and she is simply another face in the crowd. She has no glory or power but she doesn't mind so much when her sister is doing such a good job at being a ruler and benevolent and kind to those who need it. Her ants are happy and clothed, and she doesn't need to depend on anyone to make it through the day because she can walk the talk and talk the walk.
She feels fulfilled and full and downright content. It is weird and relaxing and she allows herself to bask in the moment – Time is both not on her side and right by her side too, so she won't waste a second of it.
One night, when he stays late because they are drawn to each other like magic and the stars are glimmering she tells him that he is her favorite present (he chuckles lightly at the almost-pun) and that she loves him. His eyes glaze over and he kisses her like she is his world, and Iracebeth is whole.
She is done messing with fate, with making herself miserable with what ifs, and she knows that one day she will pass away. She does not have the infinite that Time does; she will become old and hollow and her clock will stop ticking. But for now she is happy and she has wasted enough time being angry and for now, she just wants to be a little bit crazy because Tarrant looks like he is having quite a bit of fun being mad.
Time entwines their fingers together and she thinks for a moment of perhaps proposing to Time right then and there, but she pushes the thought aside. She would much rather he propose because she is still, after all, a princess, and Time is predictable and yet unpredictable so it is only a matter of, well, time until she is a Mrs. Mrs Time. The name has a ring to it and who is she if she does not win the hearts of celestial beings?
She savors his kiss and his taste and thinks about insect palaces and the stars.
A/N: Sorry if they are OOC, and for a lack of plot, but I just watched the movie and I actually really dig Iracebeth and Time together. OTP, anyone? I really, really hope you like this little one-shot, and let me know what you think maybe? :)
Edited: June 11th, 2016. Thank you for all the reviews spacetea, Happy, BatmanSwiss, and Martha Ponce and thank you for the favorites :)