Author's Notes: Written after one too many Ludwig kicks Gilbert out fic. Berlin was Prussia's capital, damn it! Jackidy owns Sean. I own Denmark's name.
Unter den Linden
"Brother, please." Ludwig sighed as he caught his brother reorganizing the kitchen. Again. He knew that Prussia did most of the cooking in the house but no-one could find anything when the male fixed the kitchen to his liking. At least he had stopped messing with the library after Germany had agreed to not adopt anymore dogs in exchange.
"It's not like anyone but me and your Italian pet use it." Prussia answered, balancing a tower of pots and pans on his arms.
"Italy is not my pet, brother." The male raised a fine eyebrow making Ludwig shift self consciously.
"Gilbert! What did you do to the music room?" Roderich irrupted into the kitchen, eyes flashing dangerously. "Where. Is. My. Piano?"
"We have to fix the roof unless you want the rain ruining it... and what do you mean your piano?! That's mine!" The albino growled, shoving his load in to a cupboard.
"GILBERT! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY COLLECTION?!" Germany shot in to the air when Elizabeta burst in to the room, eyes flashing as she brandished her trusty fraying pan.
"KEEP YOUR BLOODY PORN OUT MY HOUSE!" But Gilbert wasn't easily intimidated; the man was sort of friends, or at least not enemies, with Ivan after all.
"Brother..." Ludwig tried to stop the budding war, but the three nations ignored him. "Please don't fight..."
"YOU HAD NO RIGHT TO-" Hungary roared, clutching her weapon tightly, ready to punish the male for his offence.
"NO RIGHT? THAT WAS PORN ABOUT MY BROTHER!" And Ludwig definitely didn't need to know that.
"Germany~ Ve~ ve~ are we going out for dinner?" Germany wanted to tear his hair out as North Italy appeared behind him, the male was sure to make things even worse.
"West why didn't you tell me sooner? I already started dinner!" The albino scowled, moving to check on the shimmering pots he hadn't noticed amidst the fight and multiple shouts.
"Gilbert, would you kindly return my piano now?" Roderich stated coldly...and rather unwisely on Ludwig's opinion.
"Go buy your own, you freeloader... or play your own, I know you own one." Prussia growled back, now looking dangerously close to snapping. Germany tried to say something to stop the disaster but Hungary spoke before he could.
"If anyone is being a freeloader is you!" Hungary shouted angrily.
"Broth!-" But Ludwig didn't had time to finish before he found himself standing outside the house, Feliciano on the floor beside him as Roderich groaned on top Elizabeta. Gilbert was glaring at them all darkly from the front door, his trusty rifle on his hands.
"Get. The. Fuck. Out. My. House!" He commanded, the nations frozen on the floor. "I'm bloody tired of you freeloaders behaving like this is your fucking place."
With that said, the nation opened fire and the four countries where forced to exercise the dodging skills they had picked up after years of living next to Switzerland.
"What the hell are you doing here?!" Vash demanded as Roderich calmly drunk the tea that Lili offered him. Elizabeta was muttering something under her breath across the aristocrat, polishing her spear with a psychotic grin.
"We meet when I was shopping groceries for tonight's dinner, brother." Liechtenstein explained softly, putting the dirty dishes on a tray to carry then to the kitchen. "I invited them to join us."
"Lili, you really should ask me first before doing things like that." The male sighed, causing the younger girl to shift uneasily under his stare. "Don't worry; I'm not mad at you."
But he certainly didn't want the pair in his house. He didn't voice the last though to spare his sister's feelings, but he made sure to make his displeasure with their presence known. Sadly for him, Austria and Hungary were well versed in ignoring him. By nightfall it was too dark to send them home and then they could turn them away without breakfast. Soon enough, a week had passed and Switzerland was ready to shoot the pair in the head.
Liechtenstein, sensing her brother discomfort, decided to visit the reason why the pair had invaded the male's home. Said reason opened the door cheerily enough, grinning at the young girl lopsidedly. "Hey Lili, what are you doing here?"
"Hello Mist... I mean Gilbert." Prussia nodded and let Liechtenstein pass in to the house, slamming the door firmly after her, sparing a glare in the direction of the hiding Hungary before doing so.
"What can I do for you?" The girl thanked him softly as he placed a cup of tea and biscuits on the sitting room's table, the nation nursing his own beverages contently.
"Well, I have a request to make." The girl chose her words with care, by now most of Europe had heard about the row at the German house and she didn't want to offend the nation before her. "Ever since Mister Eldestein... moved away from the house he was being staying with brother... And well, you see..."
"It's driving Vashie up the wall?" Prussia finished easily, the girl nodding sheepishly at him. "And this is all because you invited him for dinner or something right?"
"I..." Lili blushed when the older male patted her head much like Switzerland did to make her feel better when she was feeling particularly down.
"You should just kick them out, you know?" Liechtenstein shock her head, protesting mutely at the very idea of being so, so rude to them. "Okay, okay, not an acceptable method I get it."
Prussia sighed, brushing his hair back absently. He was still pretty upset with the nations, but he liked the girl enough to not want her fretting all day about Vash's blood pressure. Never mind the fact Elizabeta was handling the issue like an opportunity to siege the house and Feliciano to send him pasta every day. His brother had moved to his own apartment, his precious mutts shipped to Arthur's house, and showed no sign of apologising. He probably thought he had done nothing wrong and was waiting for Prussia to forget about it and let him back in to the house.
If he believes that will happen then he is a bigger idiot than he thought.
Lovino Vargas was staring and he couldn't bring himself to stop. It was simply that the scene was so utterly ridiculous that he couldn't look away. Had he hit his head or maybe Antonio had feed him something strange by mistake?
"AND STAY THE FUCK AWAY OR I WILL BLOW YOUR HEAD OFF!" Gilbert roared, shooting at his younger brother and the potato bastard as he did. Vash whistled appreciably from his perch on the balcony beside him, handing him a reloaded weapon when he run out of bullets.
The Zwingli siblings had been invited to visit, move in really, the albino's house since Austria showed no signs of returning to his own home. The man was used to having others to do the housework for him and Vash, quite frankly, had had enough with babysitting him while they were young.
"Hum, shouldn't we stop them?" Lili after a particularly close call on Germany's part "I'm sure they are sorry?"
"Why? I'm enjoying the show." Lili sighed at Lovino's unhelpful response. "Don't worry; if Gilbert was shooting to kill they would be dead already."
"I suppose... Should I start dinner?"
"Sure, I will help you out."
"Soo, when are ya going to let them back in to the house?" Sigurðr inquired, patting a passed out Arthur on the head with his free hand. Gilbert had invited the pair for a drinking night and the trio had been drinking for a few hours by now. England had nodded out almost an hour ago and Switzerland had declined to join them "Heard from Edward that Elizabeta is now bunking with Feliks."
"Good for her." Prussia grouched, knocking the rest of his beer down. The woman had been trying to break in to the house ever since he had thrown her out along with the rest two months ago "This is my fucking house!"
"Fair enough, buddy." Denmark commented idly, unfocused eyes peering at the albino. "If I dint know better I would think ya miss having them around"
"Shut up and drink already!" Prussia snarled, almost choking down in his anger. "Not drunk enough!"
"Fine, fine" Sigurðr waved his arms around, almost knocking Arthur to the floor in his enthusiasm.
When Lili found them in the morning the trio was dog piled in the sofa and spent the rest of the day nursing monstrous headaches. Vash was completely unsympathetic with them and Lovino though the whole thing hilarious. In the end, Liechtenstein had to call Ireland and Norway to pick the pair up, much to the Scandinavian displeasure and the Irish amusement.
The thing that Austria had missed the most during the last two months was the antique piano he played at Prussia's house. And though it hurt his pride to admit it, he kind of missed the albino's cooking too. Denmark had come to the house at some point and suggested he apologized already to the male and Roderich, much to his own surprise, was actually entertaining the idea.
"I must be truly desperate..." The Austrian murmured as he browsed for something to give Gilbert.
"Talking to yourself is the first sign of insanity, you know?" Roderich squeaked rather undignified as he heard the voice drawl in to his ear.
"Will you please not do that?!" Prussia seemed to be totally unconcerned as he examined a set of dishes. If Austria wasn't mistaken, the china set was rather similar to the one Prussia had at home.
"Hum, I suppose this will be a good replacement to the ones Hungary smashed yesterday when she tried to break in to the house, again." This explained why the brunette had returned with pieces of smashed china in her clothes. "But I think that I'm out of money by now. See ya Rody!"
"Will you stop calling me that?!" The albino laughed and disappeared from the store, leaving Roderich staring emptily at the porcelain dishes.
"You make no sense... as always I suppose." The male whispered to himself as he signalled a shop attendant that he would take the china set. Might as well take the help provided he supposed it wasn't like he had a better idea after all...
It was Lovino who answered the door when he knocked, the younger male in a suit that looked stray out from a gangster movie "Back for another round?" Austria frowned disapprovingly at the brunet, but under the circumstances he supposed South Italy had reasons to be smug. "He is in the kitchen I think."
"Thank you." He found Gilbert cutting vegetables, Lili peeling potatoes to the side. The girl nodded respectfully at him and took her leave. Gilbert didn't even spare him a second look as he moved to fill a pan with water, completely focused in his current task. "May I speak with you for a moment, please?"
"I suppose you are already here, aren't ya?" And wasn't that reassuring, but Roderich guessed he had got all the help he was getting. It was more than he had expected in any case. "What do you want? Kind of busy here."
The brunet opened his mouth but found that no words came in to his mind. He hadn't though too hard about what he would say mainly because if he had he would had lost his courage. Austria was not a man who dealt well with emotions and his pride often prevented him from apologizing when in the wrong. Prussia had been subject to this more than once and the nation guessed that he had simply got tired of the constant disregard.
"If you are just going to stand there get the fuck out." Gilbert stated after a few minutes of silence on the aristocrat part. "Don't you have anything better to do than stare at me? I know I'm awesome, but you are creeping me out."
"I... I, well, I wanted to..."
"Yeah"
"I wanted to apologize for my inappropriate conduct." Roderich spit out finally, refusing to met the other's eyes. He offered silently the packet he was carrying, but the other didn't move to receive it up. "...I'm, I'm sorry for the incon-"
"Wash those and set the table, will ya?" Gilbert interrupted him, waving at him with a wooden spoon. "Dinner will be ready in about an hour."
Austria opened his mouth to say something but closet it with an almost audible snap. Instead, he moved to the sink and washed the dishes silently, setting the table before moving to finish Lili's unfinished task. The pair worked in silence and Roderich joined them for dinner without questions. The food, in his opinion, tasted even better than usual.
The brunet sighed, his hands caressing the piano's keys gently, the albino chuckling gently at him. It had been almost a week since he had been allowed to return in to the house. The aristocrat had feared at first when the Zwingli siblings left the day after he abandoned the eldest house, but he had been surprised at how little he had noticed about his companions daily activities.
In the past he had thought that Gilbert's existence consisted in little else than bothering him and his brother. Instead, the albino had a demanding job at the government and the military. Lili and Lovino visited him often, the Italian almost a permanent feature at the house. He was also in much better terms he had assumed with other world countries and was very well informed about current world events.
"I swear you are in love with that piano." The albino declared, Gilbird chirping in apparent agreement from the man's hair.
"Don't be ridiculous." Prussia smirked at Austria's ineffective glare, the male waving away the other's anger easily.
"Sure, sure, keep telling yourself that." The albino yawned, stretching lazily before leaving his perch on the window. "I'm thirsty, want anything from the kitchen?"
"A cup of coffee wouldn't be amiss." The male nodded and left the room without another comment, the sound of footsteps barely out of earshot when someone knocked the window behind the brunet.
"Roderich, can you let me in?" Roderich blinked when he found Elizabeta kneeling against the wall. "Where is the idiot?"
"The idiot is currently behind him with a gun trained to your head." Austria hadn't heard the man return to the room and by Hungary's expression, neither had she. "You have exactly five second to scram before I open fire."
Before Austria can think to intervene, the nation shot Hungary dodging quickly to the side. Prussia leaped out the window and chased her out until she disappeared down the street. Roderich stayed frozen by the window, Gilbert grinning easily as he re-entered the house the same way he left it. "So, do you still want that coffee?"
"…Maybe something stronger would be nice."
Ludwig sighed irritably as he made his way to his brother's house. After his boss had finally learned about the reason why the brothers weren't living together anymore he had demanded that he fixed the issue. This meant he better apologize or his boss was going to drag him kicking and screaming to do so.
"And what are you doing here?" Gilbert drawled as he leaned over the fence while lazily watering the garden.
"Ah, well, I come to deliver this." He extended the box of sweet Japan had brought during his last visit. The man had also hinted that he should share it with the people he knew, pointing out that his brother seem to enjoy certain brands.
"Ludwig, you come here to deliver some sweets?" Germany shifted uncertainly under his brother's stare until the Prussian sighed heavily and whacked him on the head. "At least you could have brought beer." The albino remarked as he went to turn the hose off and open the door. "Come in then."
"What did the potato bastard bring?" Lovino inquired lazily as Lili welcomed the blond politely while Roderich frowned at the brunet's choice of words. Really, Antonio had done an appalling job raising the boy.
"He brought candy." Germany could feel his cheeks warming up as South Italy began to laugh hysterically. Prussia smirked as he began to scribble on a piece of paper and then handed it to his brother. "We drank all the alcohol with Denmark and Russia the last time they were over." The albino said as an explanation.
Ludwig wondered if there was some way he could dump the bill on his boss, probably not.
"Elizabeta, this is getting ridiculous." Sigurðr remarked, dragging the woman firmly by the arm. While he himself hadn't had as big as a role raising the female as other nations, not even Hungary dared to go against the nation who could keep both Russia and Belarus in check. Even if she really, really wanted to "And you should know better than to get on Finland's nerves"
The female nodded glumly, still bitter about her destroyed camera. Who knew Tino could be so protective? Or that he had so good senses for the matter? She only had time for a picture or five of his adopted son when he showed up with a riffle and threatened to declare war if she didn't hand it over now.
"Oi Gilbert open up!" Denmark shouted as he knocked with one hand. The sound of something crashing came from the house and smoke was coming out from the kitchen's windows. Prussia finally opened the door, smiling hugely at Denmark at first, and then glaring darkly at Hungary.
"Sigurðr," Gilbert was looking at the pair back at fort, frowning heavily as he did, Gilbird chirping from the top of his head. "What's going on?"
"Well, Gilbert, Elizabeta has something she wants to say to you!" Sigurðr replied easily, tightening his hold on the female's arm warningly. "Don't you Elizabeta?"
Denmark's smile was possibly dripping honey, but Hungary could felt a shiver going down her spine. She was quite sure that if she didn't do as he wanted she wasn't going to like the consequences. "I... I wanted to…" The female winced when she felt Sigurðr squash her arm; she was definitely going to have bruises tomorrow. "I wanted to apologize!" She finally shouted, closing her eyes stubbornly.
"Uh… Okay…" Prussia blinked as Denmark finally released his companion, the female rubbing her arm to regain the filling of her hand. When the two didn't move the albino stepped aside, the blond not even waiting for a second before walking right in. "Err Austria is making a pie… and burning the kitchen so will you to stay for a cup of coffee?"
"Of course ya know I love coffee!" The male declared cheerfully, dragging the other two toward the sitting room easily "Though I wouldn't say no to a beer!"
"…I think I would do with one too" Elizabeta remarked, Gilbert shuddering in response. The albino decided that he really didn't want to know.
Author's Notes: My muse went MIA on me in the middle of this so it took a long time to finish it. It's also longer than I initially thought which aided to the delay.
On the house: The house is situated where Gilbert's house used to be in Berlin before WWII. After it he reconstructed the trashed parts and lived there alone during the cold war. After the reunification their bosses insisted the brothers moved together. Austria and Hungary got used to living at the house (Prussia and later Germany cleaned for them) so they had virtually moved back in.
On Austria: The reason Prussia helped him was because he knows he is a miser and actually considering buying something as an apology was a huge sign from the brunet. He also wanted him out of Switzerland's house for Liechtenstein peace of mind.
On Germany: Prussia wasn't nearly as angry at him as he was with Austria and Hungary, which is why he didn't mind the cheap gift (And then left him with the pub's bill!). He was a bit ticked about Ludwig just waiting it out until their boss forced him to apologize but since he knows the blond has little social skills he understands.
On Hungary: She is used to abuse the albino and get away with it, mainly because he actually doesn't get truly angry easily, which is why she reacted in the a bizarre way that she did. She reacted in the usual way between them, but this time Gilbert wasn't going to accept that. And since Elizabeta is very proud, she needed the extra push to make things okay between them again.
On Denmark: He considers most of Europe as his children, which gives him the right to meddle. He doesn't actually do it much, but the fight was getting onto his nerves (Because it was more like quarrelling, a war he would had enjoyed).
On England: He is Denmark and Prussia's drinking buddy. Germany took advantage of the fact England had a teenager boy who thought his dogs were 'cool' to dump them on him. He was not amused. Neither was Whiskey the cat.
On the cooking: I think it would be rather strange for a country to not be able to cook its own food, so all nations in my mind can cook at least decently. Prussia is better because he: a) had to cook for himself during his early history. b) Is a bit of a perfectionist and took lessons to cook better. Austria isn't allowed to cook much because he always manages to trash the place. Hungary is dangerous near frying pans so she is mostly banned from the kitchen and Germany is an average cook so the four prefer to let the albino do the cooking. Ludwig has to clean the dishes though.
Jackidy note: Whiskey is the cat that belongs to the Kirkland family, primarily Scotland. The teenager in question who thinks dogs are 'cool' would be Northern Ireland.