Dreaming Through Your Memory
Author Note:
Inspired by etanunu's Zutara fic linked here: /works/7802011
Trigedasleng is italicized since I didn't want to butcher translating it. For more look the story up on AO3, same author name just with underscores.
Early Impressions
At first Lexa is terrified of the dreams, fearing her soulmate is of the Mountain with their metal and English.
For years she tells no one. As she and her soulmate grow older, however, she begins to realize something was wrong with her assumption. It isn't until her soulmate watches someone get sucked out into space that Lexa realizes just how wrong her assumption was.
Space.
Her soulmate lived in space.
How was Lexa to be with this Clarke if they weren't even on the planet together? Ten-year-old Lexa decided it was still better than her soulmate being from the Mountain.
As a child Clarke would regal her parents with stories of all the things she saw in her soulmate dreams. The trees and huts and animals and food. They even spoke a different language along with English! When she first mentioned that her soulmate was training to fight her parents exchanged a look and firmly told eight-year-old Clarke not to share her dreams with anyone.
She still told Wells though, who claimed to have never had a soulmate dream. Clarke didn't understand why someone as great as Wells wouldn't have a soulmate until it was too late. Still, even though she could tell no one Clarke decided that didn't mean she could not draw what she saw. So she drew and drew and drew.
Every dream received an entry in her journal.
When she saw someone floated for the first time Clarke silently apologized to her soulmate, but by then she had already seen her soulmate take another's life with her weapons.
It both thrilled and terrified her.
Her soulmate was a fierce fighter and surely would protect Clarke from all harm if only Clarke could get to Earth where her mate lived. Clarke just hoped her soulmate lived long enough. Every night more and more violence was bestowed upon her Earth-bound soulmate.
Young, naive Clarke felt the strain on her soulmates body in each dream and longed to comfort her.
Established Connections
The night Lexa won the Conclave and became Heda she took the suppressant tea for the first time.
She told herself it was because she couldn't afford to give information to a potential enemy. Deep inside she also wanted to protect her soulmate from seeing the type of monster she had become. From that day forward she regularly drank the tea. Only forgetting on days where she would collapse on the battlefield from injuries or in her tent from sheer exhaustion.
On the nights where soulmate dreams reached her Lexa watched her soulmate train to become a healer. Not once had Lexa seen her soulmate train for combat. This knowledge charged Lexa with conflicting feelings. Lexa was proud to have a future healer as her mate. Yet she felt shame knowing how much blood already stained her hands and how much more would likely be added.
A healer and a killer.
The irony was not lost on Lexa. Somewhere out there in space was a kru living in piece, a peace she longed to bring to her people.
The tea became a permanent fixture in her routine.
Clarke panicked the first time she didn't have a dream.
Terrified that something had happened to her soulmate she cried for hours in her room until her father was able to pry the story out of her. As he soothed her, her father explained about a tea that could be made to block the dreams. He told her how sometimes soulmates don't want to share events that happen in their lives. How people sometimes did things to protect us without knowing they hurt us in the process.
Clarke tried to believe him.
Her father had never lied to her before. Yet the fear clung to her for days until another soulmate dream reached her. The dream confirmed something drastic had changed in her soulmates life and Clarke longed even more to comfort her.
The pattern continued for years.
The dreams that did reach Clarke made her fear for her soulmate. It had taken her a while, but Clarke found a pattern in the dreams that reached her. Nearly every dream came because Clarke's soulmate would pass out before taking the tea.
Her soulmate was trying to hide her pain from Clarke.
Clarke began her training at her mother's side. Clarke swore that one day she would be by her mate's side and able to treat those wounds. Not once did Clarke take the tea, determined to give her soulmate an escape from the violence that plagued her daily life.
Her dream journal continued. Only now Clarke added words and names to go with the images, having picked up some of her soulmate's language through the dreams. This was her routine and she was content.
Then her father discovered the Ark was dying.
Terror spread through Lexa as yet another day passed without a soulmate dream. In the quiet of her mind Lexa replayed the last dream again and again.
Her soulmate's father had discovered their ship was dying and that their kru was in danger. He sought to tell the people.
Her soulmate's mother feared the chaos that would follow.
As a leader herself, Lexa couldn't help but agree with her mate's mother - whom Lexa had long ago learned held a seat of authority among her mate's kru. Lexa knew something must have happened the next day, but no dream had come to tell her what.
After years of consistent dreams - even when Lexa hid her own - their absence terrified Lexa.
It would be a week before Lexa learned what happened. A week of suppressing her inner turmoil and pretending all is well as she leads her people. A week before her soulmate managed to trick the guard and not take the tea they were forcing her to take.
Solitary confinement.
Her soulmate was locked up in confinement where they forced her to take the tea every night to prevent dreams being shared. Lexa quaked with suppressed fury the following morning. If her mate's kru was not in space and beyond her reach Lexa was certain she would have mounted a rescue. Perhaps that is why they made their prisoners drink the tea.
It would not be until days after when Lexa's fury on her mate's behalf calmed that a detail she had subconsciously noticed came to the forefront of her memory.
One wall had been marked with a journal entry. Lexa was very familiar with her mate's chosen habit of recording a scene from the dreams she received. That her mate sought to continue that habit even while in solitary... Lexa was awed by her mate's determination.
That night Lexa did not take the tea.
Interwoven Meetings
Lexa woke from her dream with a start. Her first soulmate dream in nearly a year and it's contents left her shaken.
Earth.
Her mate was being sent to Earth along with the others who had been locked up.
Immediately Lexa set to work. She did not have much time to prepare before they arrived. Her generals were summoned to her. Guards were posted to watch the skies for the falling star.
As expected there was some outrage over the declaration that the soon to arrive be welcomed instead of scorned, but Lexa crushed it with authority. Those being sent down were not of the Mountain and Lexa could prove it - because her soulmate was among them.
Mentally Lexa filed away her general's gob-smacked expressions for later. It wouldn't due to show her amusement at their expense.
Before further protest could be made a guard ran in shouting about the falling star. Instantly Lexa rushed to the balcony to observe its path. She did not move until it disappeared from her view. Releasing a deep breath Lexa allowed a small smile to grace her lips.
Her soulmate was finally on Earth.
Clarke panicked briefly in the drop ship about whether her soulmate would figure out what was happening, whether her soulmate would go to bed that night only to see Clarke's death. Clarke panicked over a lot of things in those few minutes on the drop ship.
Once alive on the ground she knew a choice had to be made.
She knew not where they were in relation to her mate's people. All she knew was that her soulmate could once again see her memories from the day and would hopefully be able to find her based on information Clarke provided.
With that in mind Clarke decided to head towards the Mountain her mate's people feared using the Chancellor's message as excuse. She was pleased when four others joined her despite the frustration she felt towards Bellamy and Wells.
As they walked the other girl in their group surprised Clarke by displaying unique knowledge. Knowledge Clarke had been quietly keeping to herself. This Octavia seemed to have no reservations about showing off her knowledge of the ground. Pulling her aside after the water incident Clarke confronted her about it.
She was right.
Octavia did have a mate on the ground, a male named Lincoln who was likely in these same woods. It had made Octavia reckless with desire to find him.
That night they slept in the open. Both females exchanged soft smiles as they lay down to sleep. Their dreams confirmed that their mates were seeking them too. Hopefully the knowledge of where they had traveled that day and their end goal will give their mates enough to find them.
It was enough, although the pair would not find out just how much their end goal had terrified their mates until the next night.
Come morning the group of five continued on their path only to freeze upon reaching the river. There in front of them stood another group of humans dressed for combat with masks covering their faces.
Only one bore no mask.
Instead the female leader wore face paint. Clarke breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of the group, noting Octavia did the same. Motioning for the rest to stay - with a pointed look toward Octavia - Clarke cautiously stepped forward. With a deep breath she spoke words she had practiced again and again since she had first learned how to say them.
"I am Clarke of the Sky People. We seek audience with the Commander of the Twelve clans."
For a moment no one breathed. The males of Clarke's party were staring at Clarke in clear shock. Octavia just beamed at further proof she wasn't the only one. The Trikru shifted minuscule amounts in their surprise, only Clarke and Octavia noticing due to years spent observing their mates do the same. Finally, the woman - Lexa - spoke.
"Welcome Clarke of the Sky People. We have been waiting for you."