A Second Chance, a sailor moon fanfic

Title: A Second Chance

Author: Matthias aka MysticMew

Email: Minaru@gmx.de

Beta-reader: I DESPERATELY need one!

Rating: PG-13

Pairing: You should figure it out for yourself

Timeline: After Stars (Anime)

Summary: The battle with Galaxia is over but the senshi suffer some aftereffects of being reduced to their Sailor Crystals. Especially two of them…

Distribution: Starsinlove-group (http://groups.yahoo.com/group/starsinlove/), MAC (www.catstrio.de) www.fanfiction.net, ASMR (www.moonromance.com). Anyone else, you can have it but please ask first, 'kay?

Disclaimer: Bishoujo Senshi Sailormoon belongs to Naoko Takeuchi, Toei and Kodansha

A Second Chance by Matthias

based on the works of Takeuchi Naoko

Quietly I slipped away from the group starring off into the horizon after the departing shooting stars. The battle was finally over. Galaxia cleansed and Chaos had retreated. Peace once again was established, once again due to our bright star of hope, our princess. And yet, I did not feel very much like celebrating. The general mood had been depressed actually and I believe the Outers had to have similar feelings.

What the princess didn't know – if Mamoru hadn't told her yet – was, that our absence hadn't been so smoothly as we had assured our savior. She wouldn't have understood, wouldn't have been happy to hear it. The truth of the matter was, being reduced to your Sailor Crystal left you quite unprotected, all emotional and mental shields you protected yourself from the outside world with, were non-existent. I could only speak from my own memories but I guess, the others were not better off.

I had been… aware. That much I'm sure about. I was even aware of who I was etc., but there was no body, no linking whatsoever to the world around me. The only thing that defined my existence was the ocean of star seeds around me and the emotions from the closest ones around me. No, not only emotions. Memories. Our deepest, best hidden, darkest memories. Those that defined, shaped our mortal lives, made us who we were. I had received glimpses from all of them. Rei's childhood from the time when her mother died and her father didn't take the responsibility he damn well should have, Ami living through the worst times before the divorce of her parents. Makoto upon receiving the news of the plane crash in which her parents died… That had to be one of the worst. Even memories from the Outers and Mamoru had been mixed into it. And everything was packed into a massive onslaught of unyielding dark emotions. It was terrible.

All that though, wasn't the worst. The worst and the clearest memories and emotions I had received from only one of my fellow comrades. It had made the rest appear unworthy and hollow compared to the deep experiences I had received from… her. I had been aware that her past was probably the worst of all of us, I wouldn't have needed the memories to confirm that. However, I was unprepared for the exact nature of her emotional pain. I had never imagined that it would run THAT deep. People who judged a person from the outside, from appearance, were dumb, I knew that already, but everyone knowing her, REALLY knowing her, would instinctively reach out to protect the girl. Yet, nobody did know her. I doubted that even Pluto did quite so well as I did now. And as a result, the world just saw what they wanted. Prejudices were one thing but that, that… I couldn't really find a word for it.

I headed towards the fountain in of those countless parks of Tokyo. I knew she would be here. Don't ask me how, I just did.

My steps were quick and purposeful, definitely not the ones that should belong to the child I appeared to be for the world around me. Not the small steps of a little girl who would falter in her straight course over and over again, to satisfy her curiosity about one thing or another. No, that was not me. It was just a shell, a mask, a protection for my soul. It was useless now, becoming useless, to her at least. I had nothing to hide anymore, didn't need to hide anymore and couldn't hide anymore. Because she knew already. Everything. The whole, terrific truth. As much as I knew hers.

She was there as expected, blonde hair swaying in the evening wind, the last sun beams of the day bathing her in a beautiful display of shadow and light through the water of the fountain. Blue eyes searched mine the moment I stepped into sight and I didn't hesitate to meet the gaze. Sad, compassionate, hesitant, unsure of what to do now. I walked the remaining distance at a slower pace, not caring about onlookers while my body began to shift and my form to grow to match hers. She watched intently, transfixed by the transformation, her eyes lingering on the older body. I think, we were the same age now.

The sounds around us faded into the background and further away as time passed, when we met in front of the fountain. Standing still for an eternity, we remained as we were. Our bodies inches apart, one of her hands hovering on my arm, my head upwards so that my eyes could still see hers as she looked down – I was still slightly shorter but I didn't mind. These blue eyes so full of life and yet so deeply filled with loneliness. The craving for one who could fill this special place in her heart, the longing for the end of the suffering, I all knew what it meant, where it came from. And it was directed at me right now. Me alone.

Neither of us moved, neither dared to move, as we probably both recalled the fated moment only hours ago. A moment only for us. One timeless moment.

---Flashback---

Bright sunlight penetrated my eyes forcing them to blink in irritation and close just as quickly. Taking my time, I tried to readjust to my surroundings, wondering there I was. I felt physically rooted again but at the same time it was different. Nothing made much sense and I chose to undergo the simple task of taking in my surroundings.

We were in a palace of some sorts. The stone was a brilliant orange-gold color. Wide archways, giant pillars and at the same time soft-looking as well as massive-appearing statues and sculptures were gracing the walls. I was outside in a garden, I think. Although the simple term "garden" bore a hidden note of blasphemy, judged by the variety of flowers. A bed of roses, lilies, daisies, orchids and many, many other that I didn't even recognize. Some surely didn't even bloom on Earth, some might even not in the huge gardens of the old Moon Kingdom. A huge bird of golden stone sat atop the outside world, its wings spread wide and it prepared to screech. A truly, magnificent sight. This place bore memories though I could not tell which.

My mind was still to jumbled to sort through all the experiences I had just shared, all the emotions weighing down on my already heavy soul, all the memories tormenting my strained spirit. If not for the one, constant one, I don't believe, I could have kept sane. I had grabbed onto that one experience like a lifeline. Where had been something I could deeply identify with, sympathize with. I could understand loneliness, I could share it, that was something I knew all too well. The other memories were simply distracting.

"Where am I?" I wondered out loud, not really expecting an answer. I couldn't get the nagging sense out of my mind, that I should know this place, as if it was… home. Home? Something about this word warmed me, thinking about it and linking it to the surrounding, I felt almost content with life. I could happily die now that I was here. "In the atmosphere of Venus. That is the Magellan Palace." My head snapped around and I saw her standing there, leaning against the wall, directly under the huge bird statue. I expected her to wear an orange gown, appropriate for the place and time. But there was none. There was nothing actually. She was nude only a pair of golden wings – just like Sailor Moons folded around her birthday's body. With a start, I realized that I wasn't wearing anything either. Only the comforting blanket of ebony black wings.

Hesitant I walked over to her, her eyes following my movement carefully, not leaving my form for a fleeting moment. Patient and tranquil, waiting for me to reach her. And when I finally did, when I joined her under the protective area of the bird, the… Suiwa… When I did that and our eyes met, blue on violet, everything suddenly made sense. So much horrible sense.

"Do you remember?" she asked tentatively, softly. I could only nod. I did remember. Oh, how much I did remember. Everything was suddenly so clear. As if something had cut the shell away and left only clarity. The one memory that mattered, the one that answered all the questions, solved all the problems, made everything as it should be. The one that hurt oh so much… There were no names, only faces, actions, lives. But no names, I did not know why that was, why that was the only thing left undiscovered. Maybe it was for the best. The memories were enough anyway. Names would just further confuse us, force us to ask who we were now. We still knew who we were… in this life… and maybe the one before. And now we knew what we were back then. Still, without the names, we at least were us now. Just us. Not me, not her, just us.

"Yeah…" I replied quietly, reaching up to touch her cheek, playing with my fingers over the soft skin, oh so familiar yet different. Golden, feathered wings opened and enfolded me without a word, without a sound. We didn't need sounds, we didn't need anything to do what we did. The actions were natural, simple and almost as old as time itself. Or so it seemed to me. My black wings joined her golden ones in a cocoon that enfolded us in a protective glow. As it had been all that time ago. Lifetimes back, then it all started.

Her hands were cupping my face now, staring deep into my eyes. A mixture of all sorts of emotions swirled into those blue orbs and for a moment there, I actually believed they briefly flashed golden. I felt my heart clench at the familiar sight and my usual calm was already melted away the moment I had set eyes on her. My sweet Goddess. Not trusting the silence and the seemingly endless moment anymore, I put my arms around her neck and pulled her forward. Lips met in a fierce, desperate, hopeful, longing kiss that was filled with the craving of millennia over millennia of living with a cruel, painful curse that we had been unaware of for so long, a loneliness fueled and never really satisfied over all this time, filled with the feelings that were just reserved for us. Us and nobody else. Everything what mattered was the other, everything that was of importance was us. Again. Finally.

Lips parting, I gazed up at the simple, unyielding eternal love gazing down at me, healing my long-tortured heart with just this one look, simply that love, from her. I did not know what exactly was happening, why it happened now or if we were ever going to leave here again. But I had to know, because if we would leave, I would not leave without her. Never again. Never, ever again.

"Is this heaven?" I asked. The moment the words left my lips everything went wide and we heard the calling of our hope. Yet, I certainly didn't know, if I really wanted to go. We had no chance though.

---End Flashback---

A long time ago, several dozen lifetimes before the here and now, when this solar system was still no more than an infant, there was a time of innocence, of absolute peace. Before the galaxy knew of the star seeds, Sailor Crystals and Sailor Senshi, before the creatures of existence knew of the endless war between Order and Chaos, the constant struggle between Good and Evil.

Upon this time, we had lived the first time, our first lifetime. I had been raised as the actually first princess of my planet. She had been there as long as I could think. We grew up as sisters but we were not. We were much more than that, much more than sisters – even by blood – could ever be. We were, as simple as it sounds, harmony. Two innocent girls from the same basic roots of the same, oldest tribe of the human species. We were pure, innocent and perfect for each other.

Then… Chaos had come and everything was shattered. The first Sailor Senshi were discovered. Senshi all over the galaxy, just like us. However, by then the inevitable had already occurred, the expected had transpired and there was no going back anymore. We had fallen in love. And that was when we learned the hard way, that the universe was a cruel place. Not the shiny, peaceful world that we had grown up in. But a harsh, painful and cold reality. I was a Senshi, she was another. The first was okay, the second not. Not then it meant we were together. They forced us apart, didn't grant us our love, declined us the right of decision. Her power was too dangerous they said… They didn't even know. How could they know? How SHOULD they know? Who gave them the RIGHT to decide? They sealed her away and to make sure something like that would never happen again, cursed us. They cursed us both to never find true love again. And it was right. We never did find TRUE love again over all the following lifetimes because the only true love there ever was for us, was the other. And she was unreachable.

I did understand now. All the time I had thought Adonis to be right and he was. I had fought it, with all my heart, and yet I had never succeeded. In the end he had been right, but ironically instead of it being his fault as I always thought, he merely stated a fact. It had been her all along I was searching. Her, the only one that could free me, could break the seal to my heart. And yet, even then we met the first time, I had not recognized her. We had not realized what we were for each other. We had to die first to break the curse placed upon us by the oh so wise elders of our times for a crime as beautiful and innocent as love. In the end, it did not matter. We had found each other again. Here and now.

"No," I whispered, responding to the question she had asked, right before we left, "this is our second chance. Just like we hoped for." Tilting her chin up a little more with one hand, I put the other around her waist and pulled her close for a kiss of ageless quality. The first real, physical kiss for us in millennia, the first one in our new lives here. It was truly beautiful how such a tiny gesture of affection could cause reactions like this. I felt truly reborn. Reborn in a new life, with a new hope and with her at my side, always, forever. There would be nothing and nobody again who could separate us. Nobody should be stupid enough to dare, not with all this time we had waited. Waited for this new chance, this second time we met, as friends like the first time and then growing into something more. Something far more beautiful. Our stars were shining again. Together. Brighter than ever, brighter than they ever could alone. We had wished for it and finally the wish had been granted. The endless suffering had found an end. And anything else didn't matter anymore.

I could have stood there forever, never letting go, never leaving this comfortable space that was my heart's safest place. Right there, with her, nowhere else either of us wanted to be. Never again. Everything around us was of no importance. The people staring, whispering about how it wasn't proper to show affection in public, especially between two girls. What did they know? They were hiding, were afraid from the purity love created. That is why they were making up stupid rules. They were afraid to get hurt, like we did. But we had overcome the tasks destiny had confronted us with. We had come out victorious in the end because we had always believed. That you and I would see each other again in the same way we once had. We had believed and the believe finally became reality.

I finally broke the contact, pushing the smaller girl away to be able to see in her face again. The happiness radiating from it was enough for another thousand lifetimes, however, this time I would keep it. Right here, with me. Near me, always. Because I needed her there. My light, my soul, my heart, my confidence, my eternal star always shining to lead me back to her. All that she was. It did not matter who we were, had been or are now. We were simply two stars that were in love. Once we had names that had brought us together the first time, destined to meet, destined for each other. However, even when we did not remember them. We were us. Her and me. Me and her. Venus and Saturn, Aino Minako and Tomoe Hotaru, it did not matter. A second chance was given to us today and we would use it because… Like they say, love conquers all, right? It certainly was true in our case.

"Aishiteru," I said, just like you, at the same time. I took her hand and started to leave. "Let's go…" She gripped my hand tightly and I drew her closer to me as we walked into the sunset. It had only been a minute or two since we met under the fountain, but so much had changed. Clearly for the better.

"Yes," she finished, "towards a new future."

THE END

Author's Notes

Yes, okay that was a bit sappy, right? I can't help since I was just in the right mood for a little short story (when this happens, it usually does on Friday afternoons…). I could probably blame Ayrki after reading something similar from her but I won't since I had the idea to do this even before I read hers.

I hope you liked this little piece of work. The whole thing is especially for my standards really short and leaves a lot to the imagination. This wasn't meant to be detailed. I left a lot of points pretty open for interpretation and will leave them so. You can come up with your own theories, I'm sure.

That is actually everything for this one. I hope you enjoyed.

Ja ne, yours

Matthias